Something You Said
by sailor8t
Summary: Things get weird at Eastland, and weirder after that.
1. Chapter 1A

Disclaimer: Jo Polniaczek, Blair Warner, and all things Facts of Life belong to Columbia Pictures Television and Sony Pictures Television. Buffy and Her Friends are owned by Joss Whedon and a bunch of suits. I'm altering their realities for fun, not profit, as I own nothing and have the credit report to prove it. Original characters are mine, and in the unlikely event you want to play with them, let me know where they wander off to.

Dialogue from _Faith, Hope and Trick_ by David Greenwalt  
>Dialogue from <em>Dirty Girls<em> by Drew Goddard  
>Dialogue from <em>Empty Places<em> by Drew Z. Greenberg  
>Dialogue from <em>Touched<em> by Rebecca Rand Kirshner  
>Dialogue from <em>Chosen<em> by Jane Espenson and Douglas Petrie  
>Dialogue from <em>End of Days<em> by Joss Whedon

Lyrics from _Something You Said_ by the Wicomicos, copyright 1998 Oyster Boy Music.  
>Lyrics from <em>All at Once<em> by Bonnie Raitt, copyright 1991 Bonnie Raitt.  
>Lyrics from <em>One Fine Wire<em> by Colbie Caillat, copyright Colbie Caillat, Jason Reeves, Mikal Blue  
>Lyrics from <em>Blue Wind<em> by the Wicomicos, copyright 1993 Craig Devage, Mikel Campbell & Carmen Yates  
>Lyrics from <em>Karla with a K<em> by The Hooters, copyright Eric Bazilian and Rob Hyman  
>Lyrics from <em>Grace Saves the Day<em> by the Wicomicos, copyright 1998 Oyster Boy Music  
>Lyrics from <em>Precious Faith<em> by the Wicomicos, copyright 1998 Oyster Boy Music  
>Lyrics from <em>Surrounded<em> by the Wicomicos, copyright 1995 Carmen Yates & Mikel Campbell

All used without permission or profit, and with huge thanks for the inspiration.

* * *

><p><strong>One<strong>

Another summer  
>Dying on the vine<br>North wind leaning in at night  
>In a world made of pictures<br>This is how the blind survive  
>We cling to certain words that shine<br>_Something You Said_

Jo Polniaczek hated the idea of leaving the Bronx. She hated leaving her mother. And she especially hated being singled out by getting a scholarship to an upstate private girls' school, a scholarship her mother applied for without telling her.

Jo knew that her mother wanted her to have a better life, an easier life, and wanted her away from the gang she ran with because her girlfriend, her oh so hot bad girl girlfriend, was a member. Jo had a few scrapes with the law, and the last time she'd been arrested, the third time, she spent more than a month in juvenile detention. That was the final straw for Rose Polniaczek, the thing that drove her to complete and mail the scholarship application.

Rose made Jo promise to try, and as incentive, let Jo take herself to Peekskill on her motorcycle. Rose hoped she wouldn't regret that, worried that her hotheaded daughter would do something more stupid and dangerous than the stunts she regularly pulled. Rose held her tongue when Jo stayed away the two nights before leaving, but made it clear that she and Jo would spend the last evening together. Rose switched her work schedule, so Jo knew it was something she had to do. Not that she really minded, especially after two almost sleepless nights saying a prolonged goodbye to Lita.

On the morning Jo had to leave, Rose got her up early and they had a quiet breakfast. Rose hugged Jo and made her promise to be careful, and again, to give the school a chance. Jo swallowed her tears and hugged her mother. Rose watched Jo ride away.

Once she was out of the city, the view changed. There was less concrete and asphalt, more trees, and less traffic. She stopped once, to top off the tank, stretch her legs, and double-check the directions. She set off again, her jaw tightening as she got closer to her destination.

Jo put off the inevitable for a few minutes by riding through Peekskill, noting the locations of places that looked promising for entertainment. The Chug-a-Lug, with its old school neon and rented trailer sign promising two-for-one beers, caught her attention. It wasn't like this school was a jail or anything, even if being sent there made her feel just like she did when the judge told her she'd be spending at least a month at the juvenile jail. It took her breath like sucker punch, hearing that she would lose both privacy and freedom until someone felt like returning them. When she got out, her friends treated her like she'd done something awesome. Jo had free beers and back slaps and eager sloppy kisses from Lita, but what made her feel good was using her own key to enter her home when she was ready, and deciding whether the door to her room should be open or closed.

She finally turned toward the outskirts of the small town, and a few minutes later rode through the huge iron gates at the school's entrance. She pulled in front of the largest building, parking close to it off the drive so her bike wouldn't be endangered, steeled herself, and went inside.

It was, initially, worse than she thought it would be. The snooty blonde girl first ogled, then insulted her. Blair Warner managed to push all of her buttons inside of five minutes, and they ended up yelling at each other. The school's dietician and dorm mother separated them, and Jo tried to remember her manners as she followed Mrs. Garrett to her room. When Jo tried to sneak out later, she had to bring the Princess along to keep her quiet. Because she had to keep an eye on Blair, Jo wasn't able to relax. She sipped her beer and looked around warily, trying to get a feel for the place.

And then all hell broke loose. It started as a scuffle by the pool table. Jo tried to get Blair out the door, but there were too many bodies between them and it, so she pushed Blair against a wall before she was pulled into the fight. She managed to grab a pool cue to balance out the inequity between her size and that of the men around her.

"Jo! Behind you!" Blair yelled.

Jo instinctively shoved the pool cue back. She felt the initial connection of the small end of the stick before it slid back, meeting resistance for a few moments. She thought it was adrenaline, the rush she felt as she waded deeper into the fight. She kept at it, giving as good as she got until she was shoved against the bar and restrained. Jo looked around, saw the familiar blue of police uniforms, and groaned. She groaned again when she heard Blair's protests.

Jo didn't have the opportunity to say anything to Blair. The blood dripping down her face got her bundled into a squad car and taken to the emergency room. She assumed Blair was arrested too, but when Jo emerged from the treatment area, hands cuffed in front of her because she'd made it clear she wasn't going to cause problems, Blair and Mrs. Garrett waited with some guy in a suit and a cop with a bunch of stripes.

Jo's handcuffs were immediately removed, but she knew she was still in trouble. She kept her head down and said nothing, followed Blair and Mrs. Garrett to the car, and remained silent during the drive back to Eastland.

She didn't say anything while Mrs. Garrett sat them down in the kitchen and explained exactly how much trouble they were in. All Jo could think was that her mother would kill her. Blair followed her lead and remained silent, and Mrs. Garrett eventually wound down. She looked at them for a long time, hoping one of them would offer an explanation, and sighed before getting up and leaving them there.

Jo slid out of the chair. She went to the freezer, pulled out a bag of frozen mixed vegetables, and placed it against her aching jaw. She was mostly bruised, and not as sore as she usually was after a fight. The nosebleed stopped before she got to the emergency room, and her busted lip stopped dripping soon after. The emergency room doctor insisted on stitching the cut in her eyebrow. Jo rummaged through the refrigerator and found sandwich makings. She pulled them out one at a time with her free hand.

"I don't understand what happened in the bar," Blair said while watching Jo. When she realized what Jo was doing, Blair got up to help her. "The guy who was sneaking up on you, he was there and then he wasn't."

"Oh, c'mon, Princess, you only had one beer."

"I'm serious, Jo," Blair insisted while getting plates, napkins, and glasses. "Sit down, I'll fix your sandwich."

"Make two," Jo instructed, and moved back to the table.

"That man was there and then there was a cloud of dust and he was gone."

Jo decided to humor her. "Ok. I didn't see it. Too busy trying to not get killed."

"Oh, please. You knocked two of them out."

"I got lucky," Jo shrugged. "How'd you get sprung so quick?"

"Money talks." She put the sandwich makings away and brought out a jug of milk. She filled the glasses and returned the milk to the refrigerator.

"Thanks for gettin' me."

"Don't thank me yet." Blair put a plate and glass in front of Jo and got her own. "We have to see the headmaster in the morning."

"Yeah, don't worry, I'll take the rap."

"No, you won't. I was there because I wanted to be."

Jo didn't answer. She inhaled the sandwiches one neatly cut quarter at a time, the other hand holding the makeshift compress to her face. "Any aspirin around here?"

"I have some in my purse." Blair put her sandwich down and got her bag off her chair. Moments later, she handed Jo a small foil pack.

"Thanks," Jo said again. She put the vegetables down long enough to tear open the package and throw down the pills, finishing her milk.

"Go on up to bed. I'll clean up."

"I can help," Jo said defensively.

"By keeping me company." Blair looked at Jo and swapped their plates and glasses. "Thank you for taking me with you and making sure I didn't get hurt."

"Whatever." Jo quickly finished Blair's sandwich and pushed the plate away. Blair picked it and the empty glass up. "Is there anything else to eat?"

"Didn't you have dinner?"

"That was hours ago," Jo protested.

"There's chocolate cake." Blair turned from the sink.

"Perfect. Where is it?" Jo stood up again, and returned the vegetables to the freezer.

Blair went to the industrial refrigerator and pulled out a plate. She handed it to Jo, who put it on the counter. Blair opened a drawer and handed her a fork, then got the glass of milk from the table.

Jo ate the cake quickly and drained the glass. She put them both in the sink and turned to see Blair watching her. "What?"

"We better get to bed before somebody comes looking for us."

"I guess."

Jo lay awake for a long time, worrying about what her mother would say and how she was going to pay the hospital bill. She thought about Blair, too, how the other girl was not like she seemed at their initial meeting. Once she was in police custody, Jo figured it was all over except for the paperwork, but Blair had come to get her. Blair, in a room across the hall, lay awake, too, thinking about the girl who roared into her life and changed everything in a few hours. It sounded strange even in her thoughts, but she had fun, and looked forward to spending more time with Jo.

Mrs. Garrett got them both up early. They had to see the headmaster before breakfast. Jo was amazed to see that the bruises were almost gone. Her lip was back to its normal size, and her jaw no longer ached with each movement. She hurried to get ready, skipping the school uniform for jeans, a t-shirt, and sneakers, and scrambled down the stairs. Blair followed the sound of pacing and found Jo in the kitchen a few minutes later. She looked perfect, makeup and hair done, her uniform looking fresh.

"Wow," Blair said when she saw Jo. "Your face looks a lot better than I thought it would." She frowned at the other girl's attire. "Why aren't you wearing your uniform?"

"Why? I'm gonna get thrown out anyway."

"No, you aren't."

"I'm pretty sure sneaking out to a bar, getting in a fight and getting arrested is gonna get me expelled."

"Don't say anything, all right? Just go put your uniform on."

"Why? I ain't stayin."

"You are, Jo. Please. Last night was the most fun I ever had. I want to do that again. Well, not the part where you get beat up and we get handcuffed, but the rest of it. So, please, put your uniform on and trust me."

Jo looked at her speculatively for a few moments before nodding. She raced upstairs to her room and changed. When Blair saw her again, Jo was rolling up her shirt sleeves, her vest unbuttoned and the tie hanging around her neck. Jo tried to swat her away, but Blair persisted and knotted the tie. "Geez, are you tryin' to choke me? Loosen it up."

Blair tutted, but did as Jo asked. She was still adjusting the tie when Mrs. Garrett joined them. The meeting went much better than Jo thought it would. She let Blair do the talking, and they escaped with a month of grounding and kitchen duty. To make sure they stayed out of trouble, they were moved from their dorm rooms to a small room next to Mrs. Garrett's. They would move their things after class. The headmaster would refrain from informing their parents as long as they behaved appropriately.

Jo spoke up only after everything was clear. "Uh, sir, I need to get my motorcycle."

"After dinner," he said crisply, nodding toward Mrs. Garrett, and dismissed them.

"Kitchen duty starts now," Mrs. Garrett informed them, and hustled them into the rear of the cafeteria. She handed them both aprons and told them to serve eggs, sausage, and pancakes to the other students. They barely had time to eat before running off to class.

They had the same schedule, but not the same interests. Jo's mind wandered during English, and Blair drifted off during both algebra and chemistry. They served lunch, but didn't get to eat before history class. By the end of language class, the only one they didn't share, Jo was starving. She met Blair on the way back to the kitchen.

"Hockey tryouts are today," Blair said. "You should go."

"I don't know nothin' about hockey."

"You're smart and fast and tough. Coach Morris will love you."

"Coach Morris who busted me twice in English class?"

"Yes," Blair grinned. She laughed when Jo's stomach rumbled. "C'mon." She pulled at Jo's arm. "Let's feed the beast before we start moving."

Jo scarfed three sandwiches while Blair ate one. As soon as they finished, Mrs. Garrett appeared and began directing the move. Jo's part was finished quickly, so she pitched in to help Blair. They had a half-hour breather before hockey tryouts started. Blair insisted that Jo go, and went with the other girl to make sure she did.

Blair watched from the bleachers as Jo picked up the basics. After tryouts finished, they had just enough time to get back to the kitchen to serve the evening meal. It was more work than the others, since they were expected to clean up the cafeteria after serving the other students. They worked together without complaining, aware that Mrs. Garrett was watching them.

"Can I get my bike now?" Jo asked as soon as the cleaning tools were put away.

"Take a cab," Mrs. Garrett instructed. "Blair, you go with her. You better be back here within an hour."

"Yes, ma'am," Blair said, and went to call the cab company. Jo went with her, and followed her out to the gate.

Because she'd timed it earlier, Jo knew exactly how long it would take to get back to Eastland. She suspected Mrs. Garrett knew, too, and was giving them an opportunity to show their intentions, so they went directly back to school, arriving with 10 minutes to spare. Mrs. Garrett was waiting, her hand held out. Jo understood the gesture clearly, having surrendered her bike key to her mother on several occasions, and handed over the small key ring with a resigned sigh.

"I suggest you both get to bed early. I'll need you in the kitchen at 7 a.m."

Neither of them said anything as they headed upstairs. Jo headed to the window and stood looking out of it.

"What's wrong?" Blair asked.

"My mom's gonna find out about this anyway."

"No one's going to call her," Blair reassured.

"They'll send her the hospital bill," Jo sighed.

"I took care of it," Blair said.

"You what?"

"I told Mr. Blake to make sure the bill got paid."

"You shouldn't'a done that."

"Why not?"

"I'm not a charity case," Jo bristled.

"I never said you were. I thought it was appropriate payment for your bodyguard services."

"I'll pay you back. Every penny."

"You don't have to." Blair approached her slowly. "I was trying to help."

"I know," Jo said finally, and turned back toward the window. Blair watched her for a few moments before gathering her things and leaving for the bathroom.

* * *

><p>Jo wanted to hate Eastland. It would have been easy, but there was more good than bad. For the first time, she was engaged by her classes and academically challenged. Teachers didn't brush off her questions or make her stay after class to lecture her that she was being a disruption. She was busy with homework, hockey, cafeteria duty, and evening swims with Blair. Blair continued to surprise her, their initially tentative friendship cemented by their shared punishment and late night talks. There was more to her than their first impressions indicated.<p>

Things should have gotten easier, but they didn't. The rich girls around her drove Jo insane. They were so catty, constantly remarking about her accent, appearance, and scholarship. They were even ruder to Blair, mocking her for slumming. Blair quickly learned who her friends were and ignored the others.

Jo took out some of her aggression on the hockey field. Blair watched every practice and attended every game. She loved watching Jo play hockey. Jo went all out, as if she had only one speed where motion was involved, and it required her ponytail to stream behind her. Jo smiled when she scrambled up after a collision, even those that left the other girls writhing in the dirt. Her teammates soon recognized that smile and tried to avoid it. Whatever else was going on with the new girl, she was a maniac on the hockey field, and Eastland was winning because Jo never tired, never asked for a break, and never quit trying.

At the start of the last week of punishment, Mrs. Garrett pulled Jo aside after cleanup, and they talked for several minutes. Blair waited impatiently upstairs, trying to read the next chapter of history, but unable to concentrate.

"Well?" Blair asked as soon as Jo entered the room.

"What?"

"What did Mrs. Garrett want?"

"She wants me to keep workin' in the kitchen. For money."

Blair frowned.

"I'm gonna do it. I need to pay you back."

"Jo, there's no hurry for that."

Jo shrugged. "It'll help Ma."

"Jo," Blair protested, trying to think of a reason to keep Jo from accepting Mrs. Garrett's offer. She was looking forward to the end of restrictions on their time so they could do something fun.

"It's not your concern, Blair."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"Ridiculous," Jo repeated. "So sorry that I'm ridiculous to you," she said stiffly.

"That's not what I meant."

"Then say what you mean."

Blair sighed. "I'm sorry, Jo. I know how tired I am. I can't imagine how tired you must be. I don't want you to run yourself ragged."

"You shoulda thought of that before you dragged me off to hockey tryouts. And I ain't tired."

"Jo, you don't have to work."

"No, Princess, you don't have to work. The rabble, we got bills to pay."

"You are so stubborn!"

"That the best you got?" Jo challenged her.

Blair sputtered for a few seconds. "Turn blue!" she yelled and stormed out of their room.

Jo stared at the door for a few seconds before doubling over in laughter.

When Blair returned an hour later, Jo was deep into her English assignment. She hated Melville, she decided on page three of _Moby Dick_. Anything, even Father Waitowski's endless droning sermons during Sunday mass, was less boring.

"Hey," Blair said as she closed the door.

"Hey," Jo answered without looking up.

"If you're going to continue working in the cafeteria, I'm going to help you."

Jo, grateful for the distraction, put the book aside and slid to the edge of her bed. "Why?"

"I want to."

Jo looked at Blair speculatively. "You want to work in the cafeteria."

"Not the way you make it sound."

"So why?"

"Just leave it, ok? And please help me with math. All I ever hear from Mr. Wright is blah blah blah squared."

* * *

><p>Punishment officially ended on a Tuesday night, but they weren't allowed to leave the campus during the week. On Friday night, as soon as they finished cleaning up, Jo hurried upstairs and grabbed her helmet, then went to Mrs. Garrett. "May I have my keys, please?"<p>

"You still have a curfew," Mrs. Garrett reminded her.

"Yeah, I know. We'll be back in plenty of time."

"And the Chug-a-Lug is strictly off limits."

"Got it."

"Be careful."

"You bet," Jo grinned, and walked as quickly as she could for the door.

Blair was pacing around the motorcycle. "Well?"

Jo shrugged. "Curfew, stay away from the bar, be careful."

Blair smiled and put on the helmet she'd ordered the first week of punishment. Jo put on her helmet and got on the motorcycle. She rocked it off the kickstand and waited for Blair to get on behind her. Once the other girl was settled, Jo started the bike and headed for the gate.

Blair smiled brightly and waved as they passed the girls waiting for the school's bus to take them into Peekskill. Once they were on the highway outside the school, Jo opened up the throttle. Blair squeezed her tightly, but Jo ignored the subtle request to slow down. She loved the feeling of moving over the road, imagining it to be something like flying. Blair was an excellent passenger. Pressed close against Jo, she followed the other girl's body through the sweeping curves on the parkway.

After an hour, Jo spotted a diner and pulled into the parking lot. She was happy to see Blair smiling hugely when she got off the bike, and they went inside and got a booth at the front so Jo could keep an eye on their ride.

They talked, falling into the easy rhythm of conversations that went on whenever they were alone. Tonight, Jo made an effort to be upbeat, although she had a weird tingling feeling on her neck. She kept shifting in the booth, looking around, but finding nothing to cause her discomfort.

Blair kept an eye on the time, and reminded Jo of their curfew. They paid the bill, Blair watching as Jo did the math to add the tip and split everything evenly. When they went outside, a man was admiring Jo's motorcycle.

Normally, she loved to talk about it, but something about him bothered her. The tingling sensation grew as he tried to get between them, and Jo told him firmly to leave them alone.

He laughed at that. "Little girl," he began.

"I ain't little anything," Jo spat. "Go away."

He shifted into his true face. Blair saw one yellow eye over Jo's shoulder before the man reached for her friend. She watched the fight, amazed at the speed of Jo's blows and the durability of her foe. When they got close to her, Blair swung the helmet and cracked it against the man's skull.

He turned his attention to her, and Blair saw his disfigured face for the first time.

"Hey," Jo yelled, and jerked him by the collar. "I'm not done with you." She pulled him into her fist, then pushed him down as she raised her knee. When he went to the ground, she kicked him, moving him several inches across the gravel lot each time her foot disappeared into his side.

She stood over him to make sure he wasn't going to get up before returning to Blair. "We gotta go now. I'm pretty sure they called the cops."

Blair didn't ask questions. She put her helmet on and but didn't bother to buckle it, and scrambled on behind Jo. She glanced at the man, still on the ground, but beginning to move. "He's getting up," she reported apprehensively.

Jo just grunted as she forced down the kickstart. She deliberately spun the rear tire, throwing gravel toward him, before pulling onto the highway. Blair held on as Jo raced down the road. She slowed down after putting some miles behind them, but kept an eye out in the mirror.

They got back to Eastland just ahead of curfew. Jo cut the engine and they glided the last distance to the garage where Jo kept the motorcycle. She hurried to put it inside and pull the door down. Blair removed the helmet and shook out her hair while she watched Jo.

"What was wrong with that guy?"

"Dunno." Jo looked at her knuckles, still red and a little swollen. "It was like hittin' concrete."

"Are you hurt?"

"Nah." Jo pulled off her helmet.

"I can't take you anywhere," Blair teased. "Barbarian."

"Barbarian saved your butt."

"So now we're even."

"We're even when I say we're even."

"All right," Blair acquiesced. "We better get inside."

They were unsurprised to see Mrs. Garrett waiting, one eye on the clock, even though they had 15 minutes to spare.

"Night, Mrs. G," Jo said as they went past.

"Good night, Mrs. Garrett."

"Good night, girls."

* * *

><p>They went out the next night, too, just because they could. This time, Blair drove. Jo was stunned to see the shiny black Porsche 911, and thrilled to get to ride in it. Blair listened to her extol the car's performance standards, smiling at the excitement in Jo's voice.<p>

They stayed in Peekskill. Blair parked the car between the small café and the movie theatre. They bought popcorn and drinks, and settled into the middle of the theatre for the first showing. Afterward, they went to the café for sodas. Again, Jo felt the uneasy sensation of being watched, and kept looking around, trying to find the source, and again could not. Blair noted the behavior this time, and sighed. "If you're not going to talk, we can just go back now."

"Nah, it's not that. Last night, at the diner, I had this weird feeling, and then when we got outside, that creep was there. And now I got the same feeling."

"Is there going to be another fight?"

"Man, I hope not. Otherwise, I'm gonna think you just attract them."

"Me! All I've done is go with you."

"Yeah, well, I never been in a fight _every_ time I go out before, and you're the only common denominator."

"It's definitely not me," Blair said emphatically.

"Fine. It's not you." Jo emptied her soda. "I really don't like this. Let's just go."

They were almost at the car when a man stepped out of the alley. "Slayer," he said coldly, eyeing Jo.

"Look, I don't want any problems," Jo said.

"Killing you won't be a problem," the man said, and his face shifted.

Blair gulped and Jo sighed before saying, "Blair, get in the car. You, c'mon."

The man smiled and threw a punch that Jo easily avoided, and the battle was on. This man was a better fighter than the man she faced last night, and he landed a blow for every three Jo did. He slung her into the alley, and while Jo scrambled up, she grabbed a piece of the wooden pallet she landed on. She was holding it in front of her when he charged, and she instinctively stabbed toward his chest.

Somehow, the wood went through his shirt and into his chest, and three seconds later, Jo was coughing, trying to expel the cloud of dust that suddenly surrounded her. "What the fuck?" she asked, then remembered her friend.

Blair was waiting in the car, the engine running, and pulled away before Jo got the door closed. "What happened?"

"I don't know." Jo felt blood on her chin and swiped at it, hissing as the back of her hand went over her split lip. "Damn it."

"Don't swear."

"My lip's busted. Mrs. G's gonna ground me again."

"She won't. Someone tried to mug me."

Jo looked at Blair, who concentrated on the road. "Told you you're a fight magnet," she said smugly.

"Barbarian," Blair retorted automatically. "There's a hankie in my purse."

"I'm all right."

"I don't want you bleeding all over the leather."

"Thanks for your concern," Jo said sarcastically, but dug around in Blair's bag until she felt the soft fabric. She didn't bother to unfold it, just pressed it against her lip, hissing again at the pressure.

They didn't talk for the rest of the ride, but inside the garage, Blair stopped Jo from going in. "Let me see." Blair put her hand on Jo's cheek and tried to turn her face toward the light, but Jo shied away.

"I'm fine."

"No, you're a bloody mess," Blair corrected. "How many times did he hit you?"

"I didn't exactly have time to count."

"You look almost as bad as you did the first time we did this."

"I ain't goin' to the hospital."

"If you're hurt, you're going."

"It's just a busted lip."

"Your hand is swollen."

"That's what happens when you hit somebody." Jo jerked her hand out of Blair's, not because the other girl was hurting her, but because of the tiny electrical charges between Blair's skin and her own. "I'm all right," she insisted.

"Fine. Remember, somebody tried to mug me."

"So why am I the one bleeding?"

Fortunately, they didn't need the cover story. The kitchen was empty, although a light showed under Mrs. Garrett's door when they passed. Blair pulled Jo into the bathroom, and over Jo's protests, carefully cleaned her face.

They changed into pajamas and Jo headed down to the kitchen to find something to eat. A plate of sandwiches was waiting in the refrigerator, and she grabbed it, two glasses, and the half-empty milk jug. After a moment's consideration, she put everything on the counter and pulled the cookie jar forward. She grabbed a handful of oatmeal cookies and put them on top of the plate before gathering everything and heading upstairs.

They sat on Jo's bed to eat.

"What happened to that man?" Blair asked again.

"I dunno." Jo took another big bite of her sandwich and chewed while she thought about it. "It was weird," she said after swallowing. "I picked up a piece of wood, you know, for a weapon, and I stabbed him with it and he disappeared."

"In a cloud of dust."

"Yeah."

"That's what happened in the bar. And his face looked like the guy last night. He was normal one minute and then he was really ugly."

"Fight magnet," Jo repeated in the same smug tone she used in the car.

Blair ignored her. "He called you something."

Jo shrugged. "Been called worse by better people."

"I'm being serious here."

"Don't. It's too late and it was weird, and I don't wanna deal right now." Jo finished her sandwiches and started on the cookies. She offered Blair one, but Blair shook her head.

"It's weird, all right," Blair agreed.

"Let it go," Jo said before finishing the milk. She took the plate and glasses down to the sink, rinsed them, and put them in the dishwasher. By the time she returned to their room, Blair had the lights off and was in her regular sleeping position.

"Night, Princess," Jo said as she settled under the covers.

"Good night, Jo."

In the morning, Jo was completely healed.


	2. Chapter 1B

The next week flew by, and Jo and Blair made plans for the weekend. Like before, Jo chose their Friday night activity, and Blair decided what they would do Saturday evening.

Jo picked bowling. Blair shuddered at the rented shoes, unable to decide whether their colors or previous use made them more distasteful, but allowed Jo to coax her into them. They had fun, and although Jo easily won every game, she cheered each time Blair picked up a spare, and spun her in a gleeful hug when Blair rolled her first strike. When they finished five games, they turned in their shoes and left. They went to the local pizza place and split a pizza.

Blair picked up on Jo's unease before Jo did. "Not again," she groaned.

"What?"

"You're doing that thing again. Looking around."

"Crap." Jo dropped the last slice of pizza. "Let's just go now."

"Too late," Blair said quietly, and nodded toward the door.

Jo looked over her shoulder and recognized the man from the fight in the diner parking lot a week ago. "Fuck."

"Jo!"

"What?"

"Language."

Jo rolled her eyes, and decided to face the problem head on. She slid out of the booth and walked toward the door. "Whaddya want?"

"You."

"Take it outside," the man behind the cash register yelled.

Blair got out of her seat and stalked angrily to the counter. "Call the police."

"It ain't my problem, girl."

"It will be your problem," she threatened. "Jo, stay right there."

"I'll find you," the man promised, walked out the door, and disappeared into the shadows.

"Jerk," Jo muttered.

Blair glared at the counterman before walking to her roommate. "Do you think it's safe?"

"Dunno."

"Let's go," Blair decided. She returned to the booth for their helmets.

Jo was pleased to get away without a fight. Going home early was a fair tradeoff, as far as she was concerned. Blair was worried. She heard the man's threat, and had no doubt he would follow through.

"Don't you wonder why this is happening?" Blair asked once they were in bed.

"Don't care."

"How can you not care?"

"I got enough to worry about without thinkin' about every creep in town."

"He's following you, Jo. He was at the diner last week, and he shows up here tonight. He wants something."

"He ain't getting' it. Go to sleep."

Blair didn't press the issue. She stared out the window, trying to fit together all the pieces of the puzzle. That led to thinking about Jo, who was completely different from everyone she'd ever known. Nearly all of her friends abandoned her when she began working in the cafeteria, and Blair continued to ignore their comments. She still had to regularly settle Jo down when she heard them, but the other girls learned to steer clear of them, as Jo was likely to slam a shoulder into them or trip them in the hall if the opportunity presented itself. Blair saw these events as accidents, though Jo wasn't clumsy.

Blair genuinely liked Jo. She enjoyed her quick mind and appreciated the other girl's patience as she explained the intricacies of algebraic equations and the periodic table. She liked helping Jo stay on track in English class, and they traded language lessons every few days. She knew Coach Morris was all ready asking Jo about basketball, even though it looked like the hockey team might finish at the top of the conference and make the playoffs for the first time in years, mostly because Jo mastered the game quickly and played fearlessly.

Blair wondered about some of the things she heard being said about them, and for the first time, thought that she might have an option other than the future mapped out by her parents. Jo expressed no interest in dating, and Blair was happier not dealing with boys and their fragile egos. Jo was far more entertaining. Until that man came into the pizza parlor, Blair was having fun, more fun than she ever had on a date with a boy.

Jo was all of the things Blair looked for in the boys she went out with. She was attractive, smart, funny, and confident but not full of herself. She was the first friend Blair ever had who didn't care about her status, and Blair knew she could trust Jo. Blair thought about kissing her, and wanted to. She sighed into the darkness and rolled onto her side to watch Jo sleep.

* * *

><p>Although Jo was uneasy the next night, there was no confrontation or fight. Blair took them to a drive-in movie, figuring that if they didn't get out of the car, there would be no problems. She packed snacks and a cooler of drinks, and they stayed through the second movie.<p>

There was no going out the next weekend. Coach Morris insisted the hockey team stay in, since they were leaving early Saturday morning for an away game. Mrs. Garrett gave Blair the day off so she could attend the game. Blair took a book to occupy her during the bus ride. She sat in the first seat, behind the driver, and started reading even before all of the other students were aboard. She ignored the pointed whispers from the seats behind her.

Jo scored the winning goal late in the game, securing Eastland's place in the playoffs. Blair cheered loudly enough that Jo heard her, and flashed her a grin before scrambling back to her position for the final faceoff.

Blair spent the return ride buried in her book. Around her, the other girls chattered excitedly about the game, but continued make snarky remarks about her. When they moved on to Jo, Blair had her fill. She put her book aside and directed her best glare at the most vocal of the group. The bus immediately became silent. "I don't care if you talk about me, but you know _nothing_ about her."

Jennifer rolled her eyes. "I'm sure you know all about your girlfriend."

"I know she's a better person than you'll ever be."

"What's that mean?"

Blair returned to her book. She heard movement, and her antagonist plopped into the seat beside her.

"I asked you a question, Warner."

Blair ignored her, and a few moments later, her book was pulled from her hands.

"Give me my book and go back to your seat."

"Or what? You'll sic her on me?"

Blair took a moment to get her anger under control. "I don't need Jo to fight my battles, especially against someone as inconsequential as you. Now please give me my book."

It slammed into her chest, then fell to the floor. "Dyke," Jennifer growled, got up, and stalked back to her friends.

Blair waited a few seconds before picking up her book. She opened it and tried to read, but she was too angry. She looked up once, and met the driver's eyes in the mirror. When they got back to Eastland, Blair was the first off the bus. She headed to the gym.

Blair waited for Jo outside the locker room, congratulating the other girls as they exited. Jo was the last one out. "Great game," Blair told her, smiling.

"Yeah, it was."

"I'll let you pick tonight."

"Can we just hang out? Maybe get pizza delivered or something?"

"You feeling all right?"

"Yeah. I just don't feel like any crap, you know? And there's a Katharine Hepburn movie on channel 67."

"You sure you're not hurt or something?"

"I'm fine. Really," Jo insisted.

"Pizza and an old movie it is, then."

They served dinner like it was any other night, although there were fewer snide remarks than usual. They ate together in the kitchen, as they usually did, before beginning the clean up. They didn't rush, but still finished by 7 p.m.

"When's the movie start?"

"Nine."

"What do you want to do until then?"

"Let's see what else is on."

They sat close to each other on the couch, and Jo found an old monster movie. Blair used the excuse of the film to move closer, and when Blair buried her face in Jo's shoulder, Jo put her arm around her. When Blair stayed where she was, Jo relaxed and enjoyed the movie and Blair's proximity. They didn't move until the movie ended, half an hour before their chosen film was to begin, and slowly separated.

They called for the pizza, which arrived before the second movie started. They carried it and drinks back to the couch, and when she finished eating, Jo put her arm around Blair, who moved closer and put her hand on Jo's leg. They stayed in that position throughout the movie, which Jo watched with only part of her attention. The rest was on Blair, and the feeling of her hand on Jo's thigh, and the struggle to keep her thoughts platonic. Blair was the only friend she had at Eastland, and she didn't want to lose her because she couldn't control her hormones.

The girls stayed where they were after the movie ended and Jo turned off the television. She wished she could read Blair's mind, to find out whether her actions meant what Jo wanted them to mean. Jo stretched, breaking the contact, and Blair picked up the empty pizza box and glasses before standing up. Jo followed her to the kitchen, then up to their room.

Both girls were silent, unusual for them. Jo stood at the window and looked out over the campus. Blair joined her, taking Jo's hand without saying anything. Jo turned to look at her, wondering whether Blair knew the effect she had on her. She couldn't translate the look on Blair's face, and reined in the urge to kiss her. She turned back to the window. "He's out there."

"I know."

"No, he's out there. Watching. Now."

"Creep."

"Yeah." Jo shook her head and backed away from the window.

Blair went with her rather than release Jo's hand. "Guess we better get to bed," she said.

"Yeah," Jo sighed, and loosened her hold on Blair's hand.

Blair looked at her, her expression still unreadable, before letting go and going to her bed.

* * *

><p>On Monday, Ms. Mitchell held Blair back after history class. Jo tried to stay with her, but was pointedly dismissed. She waited impatiently in the hall, trying to figure out why the instructor wanted to speak with Blair.<p>

"I heard everything the girls said on the bus, Blair."

Blair nodded.

"You did the right thing, defending your friend and not letting Jennifer bait you into a fight. She's on punishment for a month for calling you that name. Part of her punishment is a research paper on prejudice."

Blair smiled. "Thank you."

"If she causes any problems for you, please let me know."

Blair nodded and repeated, "Thank you."

"You'll need to hurry so you and Jo aren't late for your next class."

Blair picked up her books and went out the door.

"What did she want?" Jo asked as soon as she saw Blair.

"Nothing important." They walked through the nearly empty halls.

"You're not in trouble, are you?"

"Not unless we're late for class."

They slid into their seats just as the bell rang.

* * *

><p>That night and the next, Jo stood at the window and stared into the darkness for half an hour before going to bed. Blair said nothing while she watched her friend. She didn't have any idea what to say, and Jo wasn't responding to her usual conversation openers. On Wednesday night, Jo was restless and jumpy. She hurried through her homework and grabbed a jacket. "Goin' for a walk," she said before Blair could ask.<p>

"I'll come with you."

"I won't be long."

"I'm coming with you."

Jo recognized Blair's tone and knew there was no sense in arguing. She waited while her friend got her coat, and they went downstairs and out the back door.

"He's here, isn't he?" Blair asked as they went down the brick path toward the library.

"Yeah."

"What're we gonna do?"

"You're going to die," a voice said from above them, and the man dropped from a branch into their path.

"What's your deal?"

"My deal, Slayer, is that you must die."

"Don't start that crap again." Jo kicked toward him without warning, catching him between the legs.

He growled and his face changed. Jo stood her ground, waiting for him to attack, and when he didn't, she took the offensive. This fight lasted longer, but Jo had the upper hand the entire time. After nearly 10 minutes, she had him on the ground, her fingers around his throat, the other hand pawing through the leaf fall for a piece of wood. She finally found one, and shoved it into this chest. He disintegrated, and she sprawled into the dust pile and began to cough.

Blair hurried to help her up. "You did it again."

Jo still trying to catch her breath, nodded. She bent over until the coughing passed, and stayed that way until her breathing slowed from hurried pants to something more normal.

"Are you hurt?"

"I don't think so." Jo straightened up and flexed her hands.

"Do you want to go in now?"

"I need a few minutes." Jo shifted the piece of wood to her other hand and reached for Blair.

Blair put her palm against Jo's and laced their fingers as they started walking again. Behind the library, there were no lights. Jo looked up at the stars. She was still getting used to seeing them; only the brightest were visible from the Bronx, and she'd never paid any attention then.

"What do you see?" Blair asked.

"The sky."

Blair raised their hands and pointed. "See those three there?"

"Yeah."

"Those are Orion's belt." Blair moved their hands and traced the rest of the constellation. "Orion was a hunter." She moved their hands again and pointed at the North Star, then traced the Ursa Major and Minor, Andromeda, Cassiopeia, and the Pleiades, telling their stories.

Jo listened, and let Blair's voice calm her as she began to see patterns in the night sky. The stars were beautiful, and Blair made the ancient stories behind them believable.

When she finished, Blair waited for Jo to say something. When she didn't, Blair asked, "Ready to go in now?"

"Yeah. Thanks." Jo turned back the way they came.

"I didn't do anything," Blair answered, confused.

Jo squeezed her hand gently, but didn't explain. She had no idea where to start, and couldn't find words to explain all she felt. They didn't talk on the short walk back, and fortunately didn't run into anyone on the way to their room. By the time they got there, Jo's eye was swollen shut. Blair went to the bathroom and brought back two washcloths, one warm, one cold. She put the cold one over Jo's eye and carefully cleaned her hands with the warm one.

"We both saw what happened," she said when she finished.

"Yeah."

"They can't be human."

"I don't know what they are." Jo flipped the washcloth so the cool side would be on her face.

"Maybe we should tell someone."

"Tell them what, Blair?"

"I don't know," Blair answered after nearly a minute.

"Maybe he's the last one."

"What if he isn't?"

Jo stared at her hands. "I don't know," she said finally. "I'm goin' to bed."

"You can't just not talk about this."

"Watch me." Jo pulled her pajamas out from under her pillow and went to the bathroom before Blair could stop her. While she was gone, Blair decided not to press the issue. Pushing Jo would get her nowhere, but if she waited, Jo would talk when she was ready.

Blair settled on her bed with a magazine. Jo returned a few minutes later and got under the blankets, on her side, her back to Blair. She was far from sleep, though, and stared out the window, trying her keep her thoughts off of her roommate and on something, anything safer.

It didn't work. She needed to make the hunk of wood a better weapon. She got up and went to her desk. The wood was there with her knife and lip balm and some change. Wood to the chest stopped _them_. Whatever _they _were.

When Blair realized Jo wasn't going back to bed, she sat up and watched the careful strokes of Jo's sharp knife, shavings falling neatly into the trash can between Jo's feet. Her steady movements answered some of Blair's questions.

Others had no easy answers. But Blair was learning to be patient.

* * *

><p>There was no Friday night date this week, either. The first playoff game was Saturday morning at Eastland. If they won, the next game would be Sunday afternoon on their home field.<p>

Jo insisted on serving breakfast, and nearly every girl who came through the line wished her luck for the game. Blair caught her just before Jo headed for the gym. "Good luck."

"Thanks. You're gonna be there, right?"

"Wouldn't miss it for anything."

"Great." Jo smiled. "I gotta run."

"Go get 'em," Blair encouraged her.

This game came down to the wire. It was a scoreless tie until the final seconds, when Jo darted past the defender who blocked her all day and passed the ball to Christine, who lurked near the goal. Christine handled the pass easily and faked out the goaltender. The goalie fell for the head feint, and shifted to the right as the ball entered the left side of the goal.

The referee's whistle ending the game was lost in the screams of the Eastland student body. Jo heard it, though, and ducked past her teammates to head for the locker room. By the time the others arrived, Jo was dressed and gone. She headed for the garage.

Blair waited there, holding out the keys to the Porsche, which was all ready on the driveway. "Really?" Jo asked.

"Really."

Jo took the keys. She took the time to adjust the mirrors and seat. Although they were the same height, Jo's legs were longer. "Where to?"

"Your choice."

"I picked last time."

"Just drive," Blair sighed, and Jo started the car.

They headed north on the highway. Jo loved driving Blair's car more than riding in it. She wished she could see what it could do, but kept herself to five miles over the speed limit. After half an hour, Jo spotted a McDonald's and pulled into the drive-through lane. "Whaddya want?"

"I have no idea. I've never been anywhere like this."

"Just pick something."

"You pick something."

"Fine," Jo huffed, and ordered for both of them. She pulled up to the window and started to get her wallet out.

Blair put her hand on Jo's arm. "My treat."

Jo started to protest, but decided to let it slide. "Thanks." She took the $20 bill from Blair and handed it to the cashier, then passed Blair's change back to her. The cashier started handing things out the window, and Jo handed the milkshakes to Blair and dropped the bag of food in her lap before pulling smoothly away into a parking spot.

They ate without talking, and Jo headed immediately back to Eastland. Blair fiddled with the radio until she found something light and bouncy, and they sang along instead of talking.

* * *

><p>Sunday's game was a disappointment. The weather was horrible. It started raining shortly after midnight, but slowed to a drizzle by the time the game started. The field was muddy and slippery, and the other team played dirty. They did it well, too, so that neither of the referees caught them at it. Jo ended up face first in the mud half a dozen times in the first half.<p>

The second half wasn't any better. The third time Jo was tripped, she landed awkwardly and heard her right wrist snap. Angry, frustrated, and in pain, she launched her stick toward the girl who tripped her and was immediately ejected from the game. She ignored the coach and took a seat at the end of the bench, hunched over her throbbing wrist. After she was thrown off the field, the other team promptly scored back-to-back goals.

After the second goal, Jo got up and headed for the locker room. Blair came out of the bleachers to follow her, and quickly caught up. "You got a raw deal."

Jo grunted.

"What's wrong?"

"I think I broke my wrist."

"Let me see."

"When did you become a doctor?"

"Then I'm taking you to the hospital."

"Oh, hell no."

"The school's insurance will pay."

"Not unless somebody official takes me."

"Then let's go find somebody official. Everybody's at the game."

"I just wanna get a shower."

"Not until we're sure you're all right." Blair put her hand on Jo's shoulder and turned her toward the hockey field. They walked back slowly, and Jo returned to the bench, sitting at the far end.

Blair brought the school nurse over a few minutes later. She examined Jo's arm and agreed with Blair that Jo needed to go to the hospital. She hustled them both off the field.

Half an hour later, they were at the emergency room. Fortunately, it was a slow day, and the nurse was still completing paperwork when Jo was taken in the back. Blair went with her. Three and a half hours, one set of x-rays, and a bright blue cast later, they were back at school.

"Told you to let me get a shower first," Jo complained.

"I thought those pills were supposed to make you sleepy."

"When I'm clean, maybe."

"You can take a bath."

"Right. With one hand."

"I'll help."

"Great," Jo grumbled.

"Hey!"

"I meant I'll manage."

"Don't be so stubborn. You can't wash your hair with one hand."

"Wanna bet?"

"Fine." Blair opened the door to their room. "If you can get your uniform off without help, I'll leave you to it."

Jo rolled her eyes and backed into the hallway. She turned and went into the bathroom, and closed the door. Five minutes later, she opened it again. Blair didn't say anything. She closed the door and opened the faucets to start filling the tub before turning to her roommate. "Shirt first," she decided.

"It's a jersey."

"It's disgusting." Blair reached for the collar, then let go. "Either bend over or sit on the toilet." Jo leaned toward her, and Blair pulled the collar over Jo's head. Jo slipped her left arm out of the sleeve, and Blair worked the other one past the cast while Jo straightened up.

The rest of the clothes were easy to get off. They removed Jo's muddy cleats downstairs, so it didn't take long to get her out of the remaining parts of her uniform. Blair checked the water temperature before letting the other girl get in, and concentrated on not staring at her. She washed Jo's hair first, and worked her way down, struggling to control her body's reactions to Jo's nearness and nudity. Jo was stiff while Blair washed her. Her mind concocted dozens of fantasies that ended up with both of them naked in the warm water.

Neither of them looked at the other during the bath, or after, when Blair dried her off and snugged the towel around her. "Go on. I'll be there in a minute."

Jo nodded, too tired to argue. The warm water and the pain pills combined to relax her, but not enough that she waited for help to dress. She got clean panties from her drawer, and sat on the bed to put her feet in them. She got them most of the way up before standing and awkwardly pulling them on. She dropped the towel and pulled her pajamas out from under her pillow. She was able to put the top on without a problem, and was fumbling with the buttons when Blair arrived. She crossed the room without saying anything and brushed Jo's hands aside.

Blair buttoned the top and pushed Jo lightly so she sat down on the bed. Blair took the pajama bottoms and knelt in front of Jo so she could get them on her legs. Once Jo's feet were through the legs and planted on the floor, Blair prompted her to stand so she could slide the pants up her legs. That done, she stood. "Say goodnight, Jo," she teased.

Jo didn't bite. She turned and threw the covers back with her uninjured hand and dropped onto the mattress. She was asleep before Blair left the room with the wet towel.

Blair woke her a few hours later. "I brought you some dinner."

"Smells good."

"After you eat, Mrs. Garrett will give you another pain pill."

"You tryin' to keep me knocked out for a reason?"

"I like the quiet."

"Ha ha." Jo sat at her desk, where a plate waited. The meat was all ready cut into bite-sized pieces. Jo ate steadily, ignoring Blair until the plate was empty. "Dessert?" she asked hopefully.

"I'll get it."

"Hey, did we win?"

"No, but Hope did score a goal."

"How bad was it?"

"Three to one."

When Blair returned with a slice of cake and another glass of milk, Coach Morris was with her. Jo looked at her sheepishly. "Sorry, Coach."

"How are you?"

"All right I guess."

"You played a good game until you lost your temper."

"I'm sorry."

"I don't blame you, but you shouldn't have thrown your stick at her."

"She tripped me nine times, Coach. Nine times, and the ref never saw it."

"I saw, Jo. Next time, hang onto your stick. And start practicing dribbling. That you can do with one hand. Basketball practice starts in next week." Coach Morris held out her hand. Two round white tablets rested in it. When Jo hesitated, she told her, "Take them. You need to get a full night's sleep."

Jo nodded and picked the pills up. She put them in her mouth and took the milk from Blair to wash them down.

"Good night, girls. See you tomorrow." Coach Morris left without waiting for them to say anything. She closed the door, and Jo attacked the cake.

* * *

><p>Every time Jo made a sound, Blair sat up, waiting to see whether Jo needed something. A little before 3 a.m., Jo sat up. Her wrist throbbed, and it felt like the cast was lined with lava.<p>

"What's wrong?"

"My wrist hurts."

Blair crossed the small distance between their beds and moved Jo's arm so that her wrist was above her shoulder. "Leave it there. I'll get Mrs. Garrett."

"Don't bother her."

Blair ignored her. "I'll be right back."

"Damn it," Jo whispered, but she wasn't sure whether it because of her hand or Blair.

Blair came back a few minutes later with two cookies, a glass of milk, and two more pills. She didn't bother with the light, just put the plate and glass on the table between their beds and sat beside Jo, who still had her hand in the air. She picked up the pills with one hand and the glass with the other. "Here."

Jo picked the pills out of Blair's palm and threw them to the back of her mouth. She took two big swallows of milk. Blair took the glass back and handed her a cookie. "Thanks."

"You're welcome."

"How come you're up?"

"You've been restless."

"I been havin' weird dreams." Jo took the glass and took another swallow, then handed it back to Blair.

Blair passed her the last cookie. "About what?"

"Those things, mostly. It's like they're plannin' somethin', but not here." Jo ate the cookie and finished the milk without saying anything else. She yawned.

"Back to bed," Blair said, and stood up. She waited for Jo to lay down, and pulled the blankets over her. "Try to keep your hand up," she said, and pushed Jo's hair away from her face. "Wake me up if you need me."

Jo yawned again and nodded. "'Night."

"Sweet dreams."

* * *

><p>Two weeks later, twelve days after Jo put her foot down and refused to accept any more help from Blair, Jo went to the doctor for a follow-up visit. He x-rayed her arm, and had the technician x-ray it again after he looked at the films. After the second set of x-rays, he went into the room where Jo waited impatiently, shaking his head.<p>

"It's your lucky day," he said. "Your wrist is healed."

"Can I get outta this thing?"

"Yes." He set up the saw and warned her to be still while he cut through the fiberglass.

A few minutes later, Jo was flexing her wrist. She welcomed the light feeling of her unencumbered arm, but frowned at its appearance.

"It'll look fine in a few days," the doctor reassured her. "It's mostly dead skin, and it will wash off. Some lotion will take care of the rest." He gave her two sheets of exercises and sent her out with instructions to schedule another appointment in two weeks.

* * *

><p>While Jo's arm was in the cast, the girls decided not to tempt fate and stayed in over the weekends. She couldn't swim with Blair in the evenings, and sat on the bleachers and watched her. When it was nearly time for Blair to finish up, Jo hooked two fingers in her mouth and let out a deafening whistle.<p>

Blair immediately stopped her stroke and popped up, treading water. "What?"

"Experiment," Jo grinned. "You heard me?"

"Whales in the Pacific Ocean heard you."

"Time to get outta the pool anyway."

Blair moved to the edge and raised her goggles before lifting herself out of the water. Jo just stared. Seeing Blair dripping wet from a distance was completely different than the view from beside her after they both got out of the pool. From the bleachers, she clearly saw, and enjoyed, Blair's curves, and lost several seconds in a lustful haze.

"C'mon all ready," Blair said impatiently from the end of the bleachers.

Jo got up and followed her to the locker room, where she carefully didn't watch Blair strip, shower, and dress.

* * *

><p>Although Jo swore her arm felt fine once the cast was off, Blair convinced her to stay in again. The compromise was that they would head to the video store as soon as class ended and pick out movies to watch.<p>

Jo couldn't get interested in the first movie. She fidgeted and kept turning toward the window.

"You're not going out there," Blair said firmly.

"Yeah, yeah."

"I'm serious, Jo."

"Drop it, Princess."

"Not unless you promise you won't go out."

"I promise," Jo grumbled, but her eyes kept going to the window.

* * *

><p>They had the same problem the next night. As soon as it was dark, Jo felt the tingling sensation on her neck. She couldn't settle down, and got up at every opportunity. Finally, Blair turned the movie off. She watched Jo pace for a few minutes before reminding her, "You're not completely healed."<p>

"It just feels weird. Uncomfortable."

"I know," Blair sympathized, and changed the subject. "You going home for Thanksgiving?"

"Yeah."

"That sounds nice."

Jo laughed. "It'll be a lotta things, but nice ain't one of 'em. Where you goin'?"

"My mother's. It's tradition. We watch the parade, eat, and get up early to hit the sales on Friday."

"Have fun with that."

"I intend to."

Jo's pacing slowed as the feeling faded. It suddenly became stronger, and Jo walked to the window. She pulled the curtain aside to look out and jumped back, startled by the bright yellow eyes staring at her.

"Jo?"

"There's one of them right outside the window."

"We're staying right here. Everything's locked up."

"What the hell is going on?" Jo wondered aloud.

"I don't know."

Jo resumed pacing.


	3. Chapter 2A

Why the angels turn their backs on some is a mystery to me  
>All at once I hear your voice and time just slips away<br>Nothing they could say can hold me here  
>Take me where I only feel the wind upon my face<br>Let me know there's someplace left for me  
><em>All at Once<em>

Wednesday afternoon, Jo and Blair shared a cab to the train station. They were on the same train, and talked during the ride to the city. They hugged before heading for their exits. On the subway to the Bronx, Jo thought about Blair's brush of her lips and her quiet "I'll miss you," before Blair squeezed her extra tight and let her go.

There was a note on the refrigerator, telling Jo what to eat and when to be home. Jo dropped her bag on her bed and took off to see who was still around. She found the gang in their favorite pool hall. Lita was wrapped around some bottle blond, and Jo thought seeing that should hurt, but it didn't.

She got a beer and sat at the table with Lita and her new girlfriend. "Hey."

"Jojo! You get thrown out all ready?"

"Not for lack of tryin'," Jo grinned, and tried to ignore the tickle on her neck.

"Do not tell me you like it there," Lita answered disdainfully.

Jo shrugged. "Some of it's all right. What's new?"

While Lita gossiped, Jo became more uncomfortable. She leaned back in her chair on the pretext of stretching to take a good look around the room, but the source of her discomfort seemed to be sitting across from her. When Lita left them to go to the bathroom, Jo looked at the girl across from her. "You can't have her."

"All ready did." The vampire smirked. "You should try it sometime."

"Eww." Jo swigged from the beer bottle and stood up. "I see a mark on her and you're dust."

"I'm so scared."

"You should be," Jo answered calmly. She walked toward the back, and intercepted Lita on her return from the bathroom. "You know your girlfriend's a freak, right?"

"Oh yeah," Lita answered dreamily and put her hand on Jo's face. "But for you, I'll share."

Lita's hand was cold and hard, and a chill ran through Jo. She knew what she had to do. "Come outside with me," she said huskily, and pressed forward.

They went into the alley, as they had on nights when they couldn't wait for privacy. Jo pushed Lita into the wall and pulled at her collar. The bite mark was still red and new against her now pale skin. Jo touched it uncertainly, and Lita made a satisfied noise. "What's this?" Jo asked, repressing a shudder.

"Erogenous zone. When're you comin' home?"

"I'm home now. Who did this?" Jo brushed her fingers along the fresh scar again. The cool, pale skin was alien, and Jo fought her repulsion.

"You like it? Come to my place and I'll give you one of your own."

"C'mon, Lita, just tell me," Jo breathed into her ear, pressing Lita against the wall with her body despite the constant flares of warning.

"You know what that does to me, Jojo."

"Yeah." Jo raised her head and saw bright yellow eyes, prominent brow ridges, and gleaming fangs. "Tell me what happened to you," Jo demanded again.

"Let me show you," Lita crooned and lowered her lips to Jo's neck. "Right here, like we used to." She flipped them so Jo was against the wall, her lips glued to Jo's pulse the entire time. "It feels good."

Jo raised her forearm between their bodies and pushed Lita enough to get a little distance. "So, what, you bite me, I get a wicked new look?"

"We get to live forever. You and me. None of that crap about school or curfews or anything. We can do whatever we want to do."

"I wasn't born yesterday," Jo said skeptically.

"You can be born tomorrow. You'll like it. It's fucking amazing. And the fucking's amazing."

"Nothin's free, Lita."

"Can't go to church. No great loss there. No more suntan. But we don't get old and we don't get sick and we don't die. You can fight it, but you won't win."

Jo stealthily reached into her jacket. "What are you?"

"I'm free, Jo." Lita leaned closer. "No more pencils, no more books, no more teacher's dirty looks," she sing-songed into Jo's ear.

"So you wanna be 16 and ignorant forever?"

"Hey!" Lita jerked back and narrowed her eyes at Jo. "Watch your mouth. I ain't ignorant. I'm a vampire."

"What, like Dracula?"

"Yeah. I vant to suck your blood." Lita leaned in again and lapped at Jo's neck, where the pulse was closest to the surface.

Jo turned her head so she wouldn't have to see it again. The vampire. It was Lita's body, but it wasn't her. Lita was warm and brown and when she was excited, her skin glowed and she smiled at Jo in a way that made her stomach flip. Whatever this was, it wasn't Lita. "I'm sorry," Jo said, and pushed the stake into Lita's chest. She leaned against the wall after her ex dissolved into ash, willing herself not to cry.

"What the fuck did you do?" the blonde vampire shrieked from the rear exit of the pool hall.

Jo straightened up and turned to face her. "How many?"

"I'm going to fucking kill you."

"How many?" Jo demanded again.

It ignored her and charged. She was smaller than Lita, and even with enhanced strength was no match for Jo. They scuffled a bit before Jo staked her. Jo put the stake back in her jacket and debated going back inside. She didn't want to. She wanted to go home and lay on her bed in darkness and mourn. Instead, she returned to her half-finished beer.

None of the other girls was different, and Jo counted them against the list in her head. Everyone else was fine, and she couldn't stay and drink cheap beer and pretend that nothing happened outside, or that it wasn't her fault for leaving. "I'm headin' out," she told Sandy, whom she'd known since infancy.

"I'll go with ya," Sandy said, and put her drink down.

Outside, they turned toward Jo's, and walked half a block in silence. "She gone?" Sandy finally asked.

"Yeah. Both of 'em."

"She showed up almost as soon as you left, and Lita changed."

"Yeah."

"How you doin' at that school?"

"Good."

"You make somethin' of yourself, you hear me?"

Jo looked at her and noticed for the first time the fading bruise around her eye. "You all right?"

"Yeah, I'm great. I mean it, Jo. You got a chance to get outta here for good."

"Not for good."

"For good," Sandy said firmly.

Jo nodded. After a few seconds she said, "Keep an eye on Ma, will ya?"

"She's safe," Sandy promised.

"See ya at Christmas."

"Ok." Sandy frowned a little. "You better get movin'. Your mom'll be home soon."

"Yeah. Say hi to your mom for me."

"Get outta here," Sandy answered, and walked away.

Jo walked home slowly. Her mother was hours from getting off work. She had to kill someone she knew intimately, and even her friends were pushing her away, telling her that she no longer belonged with them. A few of them ignored completely ignored her presence in the pool hall. Inside the apartment, Jo left the lights off and walked to the phone. She stared at it, wanting to pick it up and dial the numbers she'd memorized, to hear Blair's voice.

Instead, she went back to her room and lay on her bed. She stared at the familiar shadows that crossed the ceiling each time a car passed on the street. She didn't want to ruin Blair's holiday. The lump in her chest choked her. The last time she saw Lita was August, locked in her girlfriend's room with the window fan not even moving enough air to dry the sweat that poured from their bodies. They were hot and slick and determined not to miss a moment of their last hours together.

Tonight, she'd put that body, the one she so eagerly touched and kissed, someplace where no one would touch it again. There was probably some of Lita still embedded in her clothes, ground in by the brief fight afterward with the thing that took her. Tears finally began, and Jo let them.

She wanted Blair to tell her things would be all right, to fuss over her bruised knuckles, to let her know that someone understood, even a little, what was happening in her life.

For the rest of the weekend, Jo was quiet. Her mother didn't press once she determined it had nothing to do with school. While her mother worked, Jo stayed in. She spent most of her time staring into the distance without seeing anything.

On Sunday morning, they went to mass, then to lunch, and when they got back to the apartment, Jo picked up the bag she packed Saturday night, kissed her mother, and started for the subway.

* * *

><p>Blair stared out the window without seeing anything. She wondered what, exactly, possessed her to kiss Jo on the lips. On. The. Lips. Jo hadn't said anything or reacted at all, not that Blair had waited around to see how Jo might respond. She had a limo waiting and Jo had a long ride ahead on the subway, and they could talk about it when they got back to school. Or not talk about it. Blair wasn't certain which she would prefer.<p>

She was sure about missing Jo. She missed her all ready. Jo would enjoy the parade. She wouldn't be content to watch from the balcony, and Blair knew they would wind up on the street, jostled around and ending up with sore necks, and they would have fun. Blair sighed. She wasn't looking forward to being home.

No one could tell, though. Blair smiled and acted like she always did, except for sidestepping her mother's questions about boys and dating. The apartment was full of people taking advantage of their view of the parade route. Half of them stayed for dinner, and afterward. Blair mingled, as expected, for the shortest possible amount of time she could before going to her room. She sat and stared out the window and wondered what Jo was doing.

Shopping the next day didn't excite her like it usually did. She had a list of people to buy for, but the only one she really wanted to find something for was Jo. It was harder than she'd thought it would be, and she didn't find anything that suited in any of the dozens of stores she and her mother went through.

She kissed her mother's cheek after Sunday brunch and went down to the limo. She got to the train station with plenty of time, and once she was checked in, settled in to wait for Jo. Jo found her half an hour later, just as the boarding call was announced, and Blair grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the platform.

Once they were settled in their seats, Blair got her first real look at Jo. "What's wrong?"

Jo shook her head. It still nearly suffocated her, the memories of summer and Lita's end in an alley they knew well.

Blair worked one of her hands between Jo's and slid her fingers between Jo's. Jo lowered her head and stared at their hands, and tears began to fall.

"Jo, what's wrong?" Blair said softly.

Jo didn't answer. She wasn't sure how to begin.

"You don't have to tell me." Blair leaned against her and kissed Jo's head. Jo turned into her, and muffled her sobs in Blair's shoulder. Blair freed her hand and wrapped her arms around Jo. "It's all right," she soothed, and tried not to worry about all of the things that would cause Jo to fall apart like this. She felt something more, too. Not pleasure at her friend's pain, but that she would share it with Blair told her more than anything Jo said aloud.

Jo's tears slowed, then stopped, but she stayed in the awkward position, the armrest pressing into her gut but unwilling to leave the warmth of Blair's arms. Blair did nothing to move her, and Jo didn't pull back until the stop before theirs. Concern was obvious on Blair's face. Jo said nothing, just held Blair's closest hand.

They were silent until they were alone in their room. Jo put their coats in the closet and drifted to the window. She looked out into the darkness until Blair came and put her arm around Jo's waist. Jo leaned against her.

"What happened?"

Jo inhaled raggedly. "I had to. She was. I."

"Start at the beginning," Blair encouraged softly.

"I went out, you know. Ma was workin' late, and I went out to see everybody. At the pool hall. That's where we hang out. Everybody was there, and it was good until I saw her. I mean, after I saw her it was all right for a few seconds. But."

"Who did you see, Jo?"

"My girlfriend," Jo whispered. "Not my girlfriend any more," she hurried to add. "We broke up before I came up here, but we were, you know, friends. Except she wasn't any more."

"She wasn't what?"

"She wasn't Lita."

"What was she?"

"One of _them_," Jo spat. "A vampire. I had to kill her, Blair, and the one with her."

"I'm so sorry."

Jo breathed unevenly. Blair turned her and brought Jo's head to her shoulder again. Jo's arms went around her, and Blair held her and processed what Jo told her. There were no tears this time, just Jo's uncertain breathing and an occasional heave of escaping emotion.

Jo forced herself to remain still. She wanted more than ever to kiss Blair. She wanted to feel skin, warm and alive, under her lips and fingers. She wanted to reassure herself that she belonged somewhere, even in exile.

Blair was burning up. Jo was hot. She was always warm to the touch, but pressed against her tonight, she was a fire Blair couldn't step away from. Jo liked girls, had a girlfriend before. The things she wanted weren't out of reach, even if they had to wait until Jo's pain faded. Blair ached for her friend. The closest she could come to imagining Jo's pain was the thought that she would never see her again, one that kept her arms around the brunette.

Jo lifted her head as Blair turned to kiss her hair again, and their lips met. There was nothing tentative about their kiss, one that turned into dozens and the shifting of bodies until they were separated only by layers of cloth.

"I'm sorry," Jo whispered. She couldn't think, the whole process subverted by grief and its easing by Blair's presence.

"I'm not," Blair answered and kissed her again.

Later, they lay fully clothed in each other's arms in the moonlight on Jo's bed. Jo reached out and turned on the alarm and settled herself beside Blair. Jo began to talk, and Blair let her. They'd talked before, shared secrets, but Jo always held back. Tonight, she spilled her recent past, the months leading up to her expulsion from the Bronx. Chasing Lita, running with the Young Diablos, the stunts that got her into the juvenile system and the ones that she got away with.

Blair took it all in. Jo's life, she'd known when they met, was nothing like hers, and tonight, it sounded like the crime section of the _Post_, one of Blair's guilty pleasures when she was home. Blair heard, too, that there were still things Jo wasn't telling her, things besides the details of her relationship with Lita.

Jo's voice faded into the night, and Blair kissed her one more time before closing her own eyes.

* * *

><p>Jo woke before the alarm. Blair held her, just as she had through the night. Jo reached out and turned off the alarm. She had a few minutes to just enjoy this, before Blair woke and questions started, some of them her own.<p>

"Mmmm, Joey," Blair mumbled.

Jo smiled involuntarily. A surge of warmth washed through her. "Time to wake up, Princess," she said softly, and ran her hand through Blair's hair.

"All ready?"

"Yeah. We got five more minutes."

"I don't wanna get up."

"Me either."

Duty separated them, and sent them to begin the day. Jo seemed far away all day, but every time Blair thought she was beyond reach, Jo turned and smiled or winked at her. It was evening before they had time alone to talk, after a full day of classes, cafeteria duty, basketball practice for Jo, and swim team practice for Blair.

Jo didn't want to talk though. As soon as they were in their room, she wrapped Blair in her arms and kissed her. Everything Blair wanted to say was lost in the pressure of Jo's lips.

"I wanted this all day," Jo murmured as she nosed hair away from Blair's ear.

"We should talk."

"Later."

"Sweetheart," Blair crooned. "Joey." She lowered her hands to Jo's shoulders and pushed her away. "Talk."

"We talked last night," Jo pouted, but let Blair maintain the small separation between them.

"We didn't talk about us."

Jo stiffened and waited for Blair to continue.

"It's not anything bad," Blair said, and rubbed Jo's upper arms. "I never felt like this before. We need to go slow, ok?"

Jo relaxed. "Slow," she repeated, and licked her lips.

"You're not helping."

Jo smiled then, and kissed Blair. "Slow," she said again, when they paused.

"Uh huh."

"You'll explain what all that means, right?"

"Right now," Blair sighed, "it means homework."

"We can call it that," Jo agreed.

"No, I mean history. We have that test tomorrow."

"History test."

"Weren't you listening at all?"

"Watching you," Jo confessed.

Blair laughed and shoved Jo a little. "Desk. History. Test tomorrow."

"Got it." Jo backed away.

* * *

><p>After dinner the next night, Blair sat cross-legged on her bed and looked at Jo, who slouched in the window. "I did some research about vampires."<p>

"What?"

"That's what they are, right?"

"I guess." Jo closed her eyes and saw Lita's face deformed.

"That's why the stake works."

"Is that all?"

"No. C'mon, you can read faster than I can talk."

Jo shook her head.

"Decapitation, fire, sunlight, holy water and blessed objects are the five things I found everywhere. Sometimes garlic." Blair looked up from the papers in her hand and smiled at Jo. "So we're safe."

"Garlic's good for ya," Jo said defensively.

"Obviously." Blair looked at the papers again. "Staking and decapitation are instant death. Fire, sunlight, and holy water do damage and can kill them. Blessed objects, I'm not sure exactly what they do, but it's not good."

"She said she couldn't go to church."

"It's sacred ground," Blair said.

"Why are they findin' me?"

"I still haven't found anything about that."

"What else?"

"The rest is folklore."

"Yeah, that's what we thought about vampires."

"What if all those things are real?"

Jo put her head back and closed her eyes. Lita was still the first thing she saw, Lita not-Lita. Her chest tightened, and she didn't want to know any more.

"Jo?"

"I don't know, Blair." 'More and different and the same and more vampires and,' Jo bolted from the room, but couldn't outrun her dark thoughts. She reached the toilet just in time.

She didn't hear the door close, or feel her hair pulled away from her face. She didn't know she was crying again while she brought up everything in her stomach. Jo didn't feel any better when she was finished, either. She had a foul taste in her mouth, a raging headache, and the deep ache of abused muscles.

She also had Blair kneeling beside her, her arms around Jo. "What are we gonna do?" Jo asked desperately, her tone made hollower by the toilet bowl.

"Exactly what we've been doing," Blair answered calmly.

Jo pushed herself back and looked at Blair, wondering why she wasn't anywhere near as freaked out as Jo was.

"C'mon, sweetheart." Blair stood up and held out her hand.

Jo took it and stood up.

"Brush your teeth."

Jo nodded and let go of Blair's hand so she could. Blair flushed the toilet and waited for Jo to finish so she could wash her hands.

They went back to their room and sat on their beds. Jo leaned over her thighs and stared at the floor. Blair watched her for a while, then got up and sat beside her. She put her arm around Jo's waist. "It'll be all right."

Jo nodded and sat up. She looked at the clock and sighed, then turned on the alarm. Blair took the hint and stood up. She leaned down and kissed the top of Jo's head. "Sweet dreams."

"You too." Jo reached under her pillow and pulled out her pajamas, then went to the bathroom to change.

* * *

><p>Their Saturday night date went like clockwork. Movies. Low level tingle on Jo's neck. Kisses. Vampire in the alley. Another vampire between the movies and the pizza place. Big smiles from both girls, exhilaration from Jo, relief from Blair, who was relieved again when it got closer to their curfew.<p>

When Blair woke on Sunday morning, Jo's empty bed was neatly made. Blair turned off the alarm, got out of bed, and began her day. When she reached the cafeteria, Jo was all ready there.

"Where'd you go?" Blair asked while she put on her apron.

"Mass."

"How was it?"

"Good. C'mon, the horde'll be here in a minute." Jo was relieved that Blair didn't ask why she started going now. She wasn't sure that she could explain it, except that it was one place vampires couldn't follow her.

* * *

><p>Jo was more careful now of their safety, especially Blair's after the night she had to pull a vampire off her girlfriend. Jo lost her mind when she saw the look on Blair's face, heard her scream, and she pulled the vampire off her friend so hard that its arm dislocated. Blair thought it was all over when Jo went down under the three attackers, and then she heard coughing and realized there were fewer legs in the pile, and fewer, and then there was only Jo, punching the face of the one that bit Blair into oblivion before she staked it.<p>

And then there was Jo, wadding up Blair's scarf to press against her neck, putting Blair's hand against it while she carried her to the car. "Talk to me," she begged while carrying her.

"Oh god," Blair moaned. "It bit me."

"I know. We're going to the hospital."

"No. No. No."

Jo jerked the Porsche door open and deposited Blair in the passenger seat. She knelt on the gravel, concerned only with Blair. She covered Blair's hand with her own and gently pulled the ruined scarf away.

The blood on it was still wet but beginning to oxidize, and there was no more coming from beneath it, and Jo shivered suddenly as she realized just how near disaster they were. "You're ok," she soothed, hoping to calm both of them, realizing how futile it was when she saw her hand shaking while she fastened the seatbelt across Blair's body.

"Home," Blair demanded in a hoarse whisper, her nails digging into Jo's thigh. Jo nodded and drove faster than was legal although nowhere near as fast as she wanted.

Luck was with them, and they saw no one. They climbed the stairs, Blair leaning into Jo, curled around her and supporting her, to the bathroom, where the rituals they learned with each other were reversed.

Jo cleaned Blair's small wound, rinsing it first with peroxide and then with holy water she'd started carrying, taking comfort in the trappings of her childhood belief. Blair hissed at the colder water, and reassured Jo with, "It's just cold."

Jo threw away the bloody scarf and Blair's ruined blouse. She ran downstairs and got milk and cookies, and sat on Blair's bed while they ate them. She turned out the light and got into her own bed, wondering how she could sleep when all she saw when she closed her eyes was Blair's terrified face and blood running down her chest. When she heard Blair's teeth chattering in the dark, Jo left her bed and climbed into Blair's. Blair turned into her immediately, and Jo held her, one hand moving through Blair's soft blonde hair long after the other girl was asleep. Each move of Blair's ribs under her hand eased the terror of her memory a tiny bit more.

* * *

><p>The time between Thanksgiving and the winter break went by quickly. They had practice and homework and cafeteria duty. Blair attended every basketball game, her eyes glued to Jo, who played with more aggression than finesse but got the job done. Jo was in the bleachers for every swim meet, and Blair heard her whistle through her adrenaline and the churning water. She got Jo to teach her how to do it, and occasionally unleashed it at Jo's basketball games.<p>

For Christmas break, Blair drove Jo home, over Jo's protests. Jo didn't let her come in, not even into the foyer. "I'll see you on New Year's Eve," she promised, kissed Blair and got out of the car.

Blair let her go. She all ready planned to see Jo at least once before then. They had gifts to exchange, after all. She wanted to go skating at Rockefeller Center, too, and couldn't think of anyone she'd rather do it with.

Blair, being Blair, got her way. She called Jo Christmas evening and they talked for a little while. When she asked Jo to go skating with her, Jo agreed to meet her the next afternoon at Rockefeller Center, where she'd never been.

Jo was early, and paced while she waited, checking the stash pocket of her jacket to make sure that Blair's gift hadn't somehow disappeared in the past seconds. She wished she'd worn a hat, because it was colder than she thought. She shivered, and Blair was suddenly draped around Jo, enclosing her in both a hug and the fur coat she wore.

"Did any of them get away?" Jo asked, a hint of teasing in her tone, while she warmed up.

"Did any of what get away?"

"Whatever this coat's made of."

"I doubt it."

Jo backed away and Blair held the coat closed with one hand and held her other out to Jo.

They got skates – rented footwear still made Blair squirm, but if she hadn't caught anything from the bowling shoes, she didn't think she'd catch anything here – and were on the ice as soon as their hour started. Jo was tentative at first, and it took Blair a while to warm up, but before a quarter of their time passed, they were easily circling the rink.

Blair showed Jo how to skate backward, how to stop without face planting, and two simple jumps. They were, to Blair, muscle memory, and easily completed. Jo had more trouble. She fell many times before figuring out how to correctly finish her revolution and land, but each time was back on her feet before Blair could help her.

After they turned in their skates, they went inside and got hot chocolate, and laughed about Jo's unexpected clumsiness. Before too long, they were walking hand in hand, admiring the seasonal decorations. As it got later, Jo became more uncomfortable. Since those things began finding her, the coming of dusk made her feel keyed up, like she had one cup too many of coffee. "We need get somewhere safe," Jo told Blair.

"I was going to ask you to stay for dinner," Blair said, disappointment obvious in her tone.

"I'm s'posed to have dinner with Ma," Jo frowned.

"All right," Blair sighed. She knew how much Jo looked forward to time with her mother. "I'll get a cab."

"Good. C'mon, let's get you moving." Jo nudged Blair toward the curb with her shoulder. Jo raised her hand, and a cab stopped. She kissed Blair quickly and put her into it. "Go home," she said firmly.

"But."

"I'll see you New Year's Eve." Jo closed the door and turned for the curb.

She knew one of them was following her when she got off the subway four blocks from home, and looked around. The cold weather, holidays, and darkness had everyone inside. At least there would be no witnesses.

Jo led it a block from the subway stop before sliding into a shadow and waiting for it to approach. She stepped out in front of it, stake held loosely in her right hand. "Do I have bait stenciled on my back or something?" she asked, and punched it in the nose, satisfied with the crunch of bone.

It was a brutal fight, and Jo was only able to stake it after ripping open its leather jacket and forcing the stake through multiple layers of wool, flannel, and cotton. "Son of a bitch," she panted, leaning over so her bloody nose dripped on the pavement and not her jacket.

Jo noticed a wallet on the ground and picked it up. The ID showed the vampire she fought. Jo emptied the wallet of several hundred dollars in cash the vampire no longer needed, and tossed it as far into the darkness as she could. Then she took off for home at a jog. Her mother would have a fit over her appearance, even if Jo was able to sneak into the bathroom and clean up first.

Jo was right; Rose did throw a fit. She began lecturing Jo as soon as she saw her daughter's face. Jo kept trying to interrupt her, and finally gave up. She'd heard the lecture enough to know when to be silent and when to say "Yes, ma'am."

"What do you have to say for yourself?"

"I got jumped." That was close enough to the truth, Jo decided.

"Who?"

"Don't know. Creep followed me off the subway." She jerked her hand away from the sting of Bactine® on her ripped knuckles.

"Don't be a baby," her mother said, and pulled Jo's hand over the sink again to apply another dose before closing the bottle and returning it to the medicine cabinet. "Change your clothes before you set the table."

Jo nodded. She went to her room and shrugged off her jacket. She noticed blood on it, and sighed. It probably wouldn't come out, even if she sent it to the cleaner. She checked the pockets again, making certain Blair's gift and her stake were where they belonged.

Then she got a look at her jeans. Another pair beyond salvaging, and Jo wondered how her mother missed her bloody knees. She emptied her pockets before sliding the pants to the floor. Jo walked out of them on the way to the bathroom. She gingerly cleaned the bloody scrapes and steeled herself to spray them with antiseptic.

Jo returned to her room and put on clean jeans, a turtleneck, and a sweater before going to the kitchen. It smelled good, and Jo knew stuffed cabbage was in the oven. It was her favorite, something she hadn't had since leaving for Eastland months before.

They talked and ate and cleaned up, then played cards and talked a while longer. Jo answered the phone at 8 p.m. and heard Blair's worried voice at the other end.

"Oh, good, you're safe," Blair said.

"Yeah. You all right?"

"Fine. I was concerned about you."

"I'm ok."

"Wanna go skating again?"

"Sure."

"Day after tomorrow?"

Jo glanced at the calendar on the refrigerator. Her mother was working a double shift that day. "Sure."

"I'll let you know when to meet me."

"Good."

"Have a nice evening."

"You, too," Jo answered. She wanted to talk more, but her mother could hear every word, and the last thing she needed to know was that Jo was a magnet for some weird non-people who kept trying to kill her, or that she had another girlfriend.

Jo went back to the table. They played a few more rounds of cards, then went in to watch television, and her mother went to bed as soon as the news went off. Jo turned off the television and lights and went to her room. She changed into pajamas and got into bed. Tomorrow was her mother's day off, and they were going to New Jersey to visit her sister's family.


	4. Chapter 2B

Jo dressed warmer this time, but it was overcast and damp, and the wind roared down the streets, funneled by the buildings. Again, Blair opened her fur and hugged it around Jo, and again Jo snuggled into her for several extra seconds.

Blair made back-to-back reservations for them, and they spent the entire two hours on the ice. By the end of their time, Blair was glad it was over, and happier still at how beautiful Jo was, laughing, her face a little flushed.

Again, they had hot chocolate before setting off hand in hand in a different direction than the time before. Jo didn't realize how much time passed until she felt the tickle on her neck.

Blair felt the change in her friend's body language. "Jo?"

"We need to get inside," Jo said urgently.

"Is it?"

"Yeah," Jo answered, her tone grim. She walked a little faster.

Blair matched her speed. "We can take a taxi," she suggested.

Jo looked around, then agreed. She let Blair lead her to the street and hail a cab. They were quiet during the ride, their joined hands resting between them on the seat.

Jo couldn't believe how big Blair's apartment was. Blair's bedroom alone was larger than her mother's entire place. She'd known Blair was rich, but the penthouse, with its view of Central Park and the rest of the city, drove that point home to Jo.

"It's just us tonight," Blair said quietly.

"That's good, right?" Jo asked nervously.

"Certainly," Blair smiled.

"Nice place."

"Thanks. I'm glad you got to see it before it turned into party central."

"Yeah, about that."

"Oh, no, you are not backing out on me now," Blair said firmly. "I'm going to pick you up at 4 p.m. and you are coming to the party with me."

"I thought it was going to be," Jo stopped, uncertain how to explain her apprehension to Blair.

Blair seemed to read her discomfort. "You'll be fine," she promised. "Besides, after I put in my appearance, we can sneak out and go to Times Square."

Jo smiled. That would be fun, and if it cost a few hours of being nice to strangers, she could put up with it. "Deal."

"Good. Now come and open your presents."

"Blair," Jo protested.

"Jo," Blair answered.

"All right. I'll be right there." Jo went back to the closet and removed Blair's gift from her jacket. The wrapping was a little worn from being carried around for several days and taking at least one direct hit in the fight.

Jo stopped at the far side of the living room. While she was gone, Blair turned on the tree, and now she stood near it, relaxed and beautiful, and totally took Jo's breath. She watched Blair for as long as she could before approaching her, the box held out. "Merry Christmas."

"Thank you." Blair neatly unwrapped the paper, and Jo was glad the bracelet was in a real jewelry box and not a piece of cardboard. Blair opened the lid. "Oh, it's beautiful. Put it on me."

Jo hoped her hands didn't shake noticeably as she removed the bracelet from the box and fastened it around Blair's left wrist. It looked exactly as Jo pictured it there when she saw it.

Blair looked at it, admiring the delicate twin links. She smiled at Jo, who smiled back while her heart pounded. "Thank you so much, Jo," she said, and kissed her.

"You're welcome," Jo answered, her smile a little bigger.

"Sit down," Blair instructed.

Jo moved to the nearest chair.

"I know you're going to say it's too much, but it's really not."

Jo waited. Blair put a large box on her lap, then added three smaller ones.

"You're right. It's too much."

"Jo, please."

Jo looked up at Blair. She looked upset at the thought that Jo might refuse her gifts. They argued regularly over Blair paying for things that were out of Jo's budget. Tickets to a play they wanted to see. Dinner and movies and pizza afterward. Blair's gift and her mother's had taken all of the money Jo saved from her cafeteria job and a few odd jobs she'd picked up on the rare weekend that wasn't completely filled with school and school activities. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Blair answered, relief obvious in her tone. She gathered the smaller boxes and waited for Jo to open the large one.

It contained a new leather jacket, lined against the cold. The leather was all ready soft and pliable, and the coat fit perfectly. The smaller boxes were leather gloves, lined to match the jacket, a scarf that also matched the lining, and a silver-colored cross on a fine chain. "Thank you," Jo repeated, and offered the box holding the necklace to Blair. "Put it on."

When Blair took the box, Jo used both hands to move her hair out of the way. Blair moved behind the chair and carefully placed the chain around Jo's neck. She kissed the patch of bare skin below the clasp, a place that was almost always covered by Jo's gorgeous hair.

Jo was glad Blair was behind her, and couldn't see her sudden rush of color. She was oh so aware of Blair's soft fingertips brushing her neck, her warm exhalations over her skin.

Blair came around and looked at the necklace. She made a small adjustment to the chain, not that it really needed it, but because she needed to touch Jo again. The cross rested just below the hollow of her throat, right where Blair intended it to.

"Thank you," Jo choked out, her voice just above a whisper.

Blair kissed her. "You're welcome," she said. "Hungry?" she asked seconds later.

"When am I not?" Jo joked.

Blair looked back and smiled, grateful to Jo for lowering the tension between them. "True. Let's go see what we have."

Jo followed her to the kitchen.

Jo wanted to argue when Blair had the doorman get a cab for Jo, but the freezing temperature, noticeable even in her new coat, changed her mind. "The fare's in your pocket," Blair told her quietly when they hugged one more time.

"See you in a couple days."

"Be careful."

"Yeah."

* * *

><p>The next time Jo saw Blair's bedroom, she put her bag down beside the dresser and looked at the bed, where clothes lay. "Can't decide what to wear?" she asked.<p>

"I know what I'm wearing. The question is, what are you wearing? It's a loan," Blair added in a hurry.

"One of them?" Jo asked uncertainly.

"Just for a few hours."

Jo walked around the bed a few times. "This," she decided, and pointed at the first outfit Blair pulled from her closet hours before. It would fit Jo's leaner build much better than it did her own.

At 8 p.m., they were moving through the guests, stopping to talk, it seemed to Jo, with everyone. Blair mingled, and Jo tagged along, smiling politely and doing her best to make conversation. At 9:30, Blair pulled her back into the bedroom. They changed, putting tights on under their jeans, turtlenecks under their sweaters. There would be no bags tonight, and they both put cash and ID in a front pocket before picking up their coats, deliberately left in Blair's room earlier. Blair also took a credit card.

They slipped out the door without any problem. Blair waved off the doorman when he offered to get them a cab. She held Jo's hand tightly as walked downtown. The crowd became denser as they moved through it toward their destination, Blair leaning close to hear what Jo said and to answer her.

It was like nothing Blair ever did before. Usually, she left her mother's party at 11 p.m. to shut herself into her room and watch the traditional ball drop on television. Being here was so much better, Blair thought, especially with Jo. She walked them through the crowd, yelling "Happy New Year!" back at every drunk who bumped into her and said that instead of excuse me. By 11:45, Jo had them at the perfect vantage point. She stood behind Blair, who held the coffee they were sharing. When she emptied the cup, Jo crushed it and put it in her pocket, then wrapped her arms around Blair.

Blair leaned back into her with a sigh. "I like this better than the party."

"Me too."

Jo's breath across her ear made Blair shudder. "Ten," the crowd began to count, the volume a physical sensation. At one, Blair turned, and kissed Jo. Jo pulled Blair closer and returned the kiss, which went on and on while confetti fell and the crowd yelled.

"Happy New Year," Blair said into Jo's ear, the only way she could be sure to be heard.

"Happy New Year," Jo answered, and kissed just below Blair's ear.

"What now?"

"Well, we find a phone and I call Ma, and then we head back."

Blair pointed. "There's one."

They made their way to it. Jo dropped in a quarter and dialed the number. "Happy New Year, Ma."

"Happy New Year, Jo. Where are you? I can barely hear."

"Times Square."

"I thought you were going to a party at your friend's house."

"We did, and then we came down here."

"Be careful."

"Always am," Jo answered cheerfully. "Love you, Ma. I'll call you on Sunday, ok?"

"I love you, too," Rose answered, and ended the call.

"That was sweet."

"Yeah." Jo rolled her eyes. "Let's get outta here before the puking starts."

Getting out took just as long as getting in, but they were able to pick up speed as the crowds thinned out. Blair dropped Jo's hand in favor of putting her arm around Jo's waist, and Jo reciprocated. They slowed a little then, but not much. It was cold without the insulation of bodies massed around them.

The party was still going strong when they returned. Jo was hungry, and without changing they went to the buffet table. Jo let Blair talk when it was necessary, while she piled food onto two plates. "Can you get us something to drink?"

"Meet you in my room," Blair said.

True to her word, she entered the room minutes after Jo, her hands full. Blair had two glasses of soda in one hand, two crystal flutes with champagne in the other. She crossed the room and put the drinks down on the window table where Jo sat. She pulled her chair beside Jo's and picked a shrimp from one of the plates. As always, Jo ate steadily while Blair nibbled.

When the plates were empty, Blair pushed them away. She handed one of the champagne glasses to Jo. "We should toast the new year."

"Thought we all ready did."

"Oh, we can do that again." Blair held her glass toward Jo. "Happy New Year."

"Happy New Year," Jo answered. She sipped the champagne cautiously, and hurriedly set it down before sneezing violently twice.

Blair giggled. Jo blinked a few times, then tried another sip with the same results. This time, she put the glass down at the edge of her reach so it wouldn't spill while Blair laughed merrily.

"Amused, are we?"

"Slightly," Blair answered once she got herself under control. She took Jo's hand. "It was cute."

"Cute."

"Absolutely." Blair put her glass down and leaned over. She kissed Jo.

Jo didn't hesitate to kiss Blair back, and when they broke apart, smiled goofily. "Wow." 'I got it bad,' she thought before sliding her chair as close to Blair's as she could and kissing her.

All the distance they carefully kept between them in Blair's huge bed disappeared by morning. They woke in the middle of the bed, Blair pressed into Jo's back, her arm around the brunette's waist.

Jo rolled over and propped her head on her hand. As much as she wanted to feel Blair's body against her, Jo left six inches between them. She traced Blair's features with two fingers, before kissing her. When it ended, they remained forehead to forehead, Blair's fingers tangled in Jo's hair, Jo's thumb stroking Blair's cheek.

"If we go back today, we'll have tomorrow to ourselves," Blair said.

"You wanna?"

Blair kissed her again. She inched closer and slid her other arm under Jo. She bunched up Jo's top until she was able to splay her fingers on the skin of Jo's back. Jo moved her hand down Blair's bare arm, along the edge of her breast and the rise of her hip until she reached Blair's smooth thigh. Jo caressed her skin before moving her hand up again. This time, she cupped Blair's breast and brushed the nipple with her thumb.

Blair gasped, but didn't break their kiss. She ran her hand up and down Jo's back, and finally slid it past the waistband of her pajama bottoms. Blair hesitated for a moment before moving her hand down. It was different, touching Jo's skin directly instead of through layers of clothing. Combined with what Jo was doing to her breast and their kisses, Blair was quickly losing the ability to think rationally.

Jo wanted to give in to her feelings, Blair's hand on her butt, stroking and kneading and pulling her closer; Blair's breast in her hand, the nipple between two fingers; and the breathless, seamless kisses that made her see stars. Instead, she gradually disengaged, moving her hand from Blair's breast to her back, slowing the tempo of their kisses until they stopped and were again forehead to forehead.

"We have stuff to do," Jo said.

"Starting with a cold shower," Blair sighed.

"Two," Jo answered. "I'll go first." She rolled away before Blair could stop her.

* * *

><p>Jo drove them back to Eastland. They picked up a pizza in Peekskill for dinner. Jo unloaded the car, making two trips up to their room with Blair's bags and one with her own before moving Blair's Porsche to the garage. She looked longingly at her motorcycle for a few moments. Spring couldn't come soon enough.<p>

They ate pizza in front of the television and shared a few kisses on the couch before heading up to bed. There were no classes on the second, and the cafeteria wouldn't be open until dinner, so they were able to sleep in again.

They spent part of the afternoon on the basketball court, both of them practicing layups and free throws, and part swimming laps in the pool. They served dinner, went upstairs to make sure they were ready for classes, and made out until they were interrupted by knocking on the door. Fortunately, Mrs. Garrett didn't open the door, just reminded them of the time and that they had to be in the kitchen promptly at 7 a.m.

Beginning the next day, they fell into their regular patterns. Serve breakfast, grab something to eat, class, serve lunch (they'd learned to take turns so they got a meal, too), class, practice, serve dinner, homework, bed. Blair cheered at Jo's Friday night basketball games, and Jo cheered at the Saturday morning swim meets, and on Saturday night they went out together, Blair's car giving them freedom most of the other students didn't have.

On most Saturday nights, there was at least one fight. Jo never went looking for trouble, but it found her everywhere, one or two vampires at a time. She became a better fighter, thankful for every dirty trick she picked up on the street, and was hurt less often. It gave her another outlet for her energy and aggression. Jo got into the habit of picking pockets in the middle of a fight. So many of them had cash, and anything Jo could pay for was one less hour her mother had to work.

Blair surprised Jo with her physical affection in public. It was no more than occurred between other girls, holding hands or putting her arm through Jo's as they walked. Jo quickly became accustomed to it, and would initiate contact if Blair didn't. In their room, they continued their explorations. They stayed above the waist, although clothes were gradually shed.

Basketball and swimming ended, and Jo started softball practice. It wasn't much different than baseball, which Jo, a lifelong Yankees fan, understood well. She played shortstop like she played other sports, her speed, aggression, and natural ability giving her an edge that made the other team think twice about trying steal a base or get away with an infield hit.

By spring, much of the teasing stopped once the perpetrators realized they wouldn't get a response from either girl. It didn't hurt that they were standouts on the usually lackluster Eastland teams, or that Jennifer's punishment put them on notice that some things wouldn't be tolerated.

Jo stayed at school during spring break while Blair's father took her to Europe. Jo took Blair to the train station, and Blair told her to use the car if she went out, because she worried about Jo riding her motorcycle. She kissed Jo goodbye in the car. "I'm going to miss you."

"I'll miss you, too. Have fun. Take lots of pictures."

"I will. Be careful."

Jo nodded and kissed her again. She pulled away abruptly and got out of the car. She got Blair's bags from the trunk. Blair got out of the car and straightened her dress. She led Jo inside, and once the bags were checked, Jo waited with her in the lounge. They sat, silently holding hands, until boarding began for Blair's train. Jo hugged her tightly one more time. "Have fun," she said again.

Blair nodded and touched her cheek. She kissed Jo briefly, and when Jo let her, go, went quickly toward the platform. Jo watched until Blair went through the door, then sighed. Two weeks mostly alone at Eastland. Her mother had to work, and there was nothing for Jo to do at home except get into trouble, and she could find plenty of that here.

She started that night, riding her motorcycle to the Chug-A-Lug. She got a beer and waited her turn at the pool table. While she waited, Jo observed the goings on, and saw one of _them_ as soon as her neck began to tickle. Jo sighed and walked to the corner booth. She slid in across from him. "This is a no zone for you, pal."

"Excuse me?"

"No biting, no fighting, no annoying me."

"Outside?" the vampire suggested.

"Which part of no annoying me did you not get?"

"All of it. Outside."

"Fine." Jo finished her beer and got up. "Let's go." She waited for the vampire and followed him out of the bar. They went around to the side of the building. Two more waited there.

"Damn it," Jo swore softly, and got out her stake. "Who's first?" she asked.

They didn't take turns, but Jo was able to dance away from the initial assault and grab one by the collar. She swung it onto her stake and looked at the other two, waiting. They didn't disappoint. One went high and the other low. She avoided the sweep kick but took a punch that dazed her for a second, long enough for her legs to be pulled away.

Jo tried to get up, and when she couldn't, settled for kicking. She saw an ankle and yanked, bringing its owner to the ground, and was able to roll away and to her feet. The other vampire was waiting, and they traded punches and kicks until Jo got it down and staked it.

That left only the first vampire. They circled each other warily. Jo made the first move this time, attacking with her fists. He blocked her and tried to move in close, but she punched him away, then ducked in and pounded on his ribs while emptying his pockets. His fist caught her on the temple, and Jo was momentarily dazed again, but when he moved in to hit her again, she brought her stake up.

He dissipated into dust, and she sneezed. Then she gathered up what she'd dumped from his pockets: A wad of cash and a knot of tangled jewelry, mostly necklaces. There was a notebook, too, and Jo shrugged and slipped it into her pocket. She went back in the bar and went directly to the bathroom. Jo used a damp paper towel to wipe her face and looked critically in the mirror. Bruises would be gone in the morning, and shouldn't be too noticeable in the bar's dim light. She went out and got another beer, and returned to her place in the pool table line.

On the fourth day, the first note arrived from Blair. Every day after that, a piece of mail came. Postcards, mostly, all signed _Love, Blair_. Every day, Jo read all of them and sighed. Every night, she took off on her motorcycle to a different bar, and every night she came back dinged up. She cleaned herself up and lay on her bed and missed Blair until she fell asleep.

Blair came back early, hoping to catch Jo so they could get a pizza and talk. She missed her. The thought of summer apart distressed her. Blair never missed anyone like this before, certainly not her parents. Europe was… It wasn't fun, that was for sure. It was enlightening, as Blair sat quietly behind her father and listened to the business meetings while pretending to read. Afterward, when she wasn't certain what exactly happened or why, she asked, and got a small thrill when her father didn't just brush her aside.

There were meetings, but there was time for sightseeing and shopping. Blair had a small bag of things she got just for Jo, something small in every one of the cities she'd been in at least 24 hours. London. Brussels. Paris. Rome. Vienna. Zurich. Madrid.

But Jo was gone when Blair arrived, and as the hours passed, Blair paced and became more worried, even as she told herself it was stupid. Jo went to a movie. Or the arcade. Or just to ride because she loved the feeling. When Jo stumbled in after midnight, bloody and reeking of beer, Blair was torn between anger and concern, and anger had the upper hand.

The last night of their separation was the worst for Jo. There were no vampires this time. It was just a bar fight. The second time the old guy pinched her ass, she slugged him. It seemed that the entire crowd turned on her. By the time she was ejected from the bar – literally tossed into the parking lot – Jo was a bloody, bruised mess. It took her a minute to stand up after her first failed attempt to push up off the gravel resulted in another layer of scrapes.

Riding home was difficult. She was dizzy and seeing double, and more than a little sick to her stomach. 'Concussion,' she decided, and kept going.

Her luck was no better when she arrived at Eastland. Blair paced the kitchen, her eyes fixed on Jo the moment she came through the door. She was ready to blast Jo for breaking her promise, but Jo was so beat up that she couldn't. "Upstairs," Blair directed.

Jo didn't answer. She stumbled toward the stairs. Blair stayed behind her, one hand on Jo's hip to steady her. They went into the bathroom and Blair turned on the light and closed the door while Jo went to the sink.

Jo shrugged off her jacket and let it fall to the floor, then opened both taps wide. She started washing her hands. When she finished that, she picked up the washcloth Blair put on the sink and began cleaning her face.

"Sit down." Blair directed. "I'll do that."

"I got it," Jo said roughly.

"Let me," Blair said firmly.

Jo knew there would be words later about the motorcycle and fighting, and decided not to compound her trouble. She sat on the tub and raised her face. Blair started at her hairline and wiped gently until she could see all of the bruises and the healing cuts and scrapes. She rinsed the washcloth and left it there.

"C'mon," Blair said, and held out her hand.

Jo closed one eye to get a fix on it, then put hers in it and stood up. Blair took them to their room and sat Jo on her bed. "What happened?"

"Bar fight," Jo sighed.

"I thought you weren't going to do that."

"I wasn't planning on it."

"And you rode your motorcycle."

"Yeah," Jo sighed again.

"This is not the surprise I planned."

Jo looked at the floor.

"Why?"

"Needed something to do."

"And you couldn't, I don't know, take some laps or write your term paper or clean the pantry? You had to ride your motorcycle to a bar, get drunk, and get into a fight?"

"No. I mean, yes. I mean, I did that stuff. I swam laps. I ran laps. I wrote two term papers. And I'm not drunk."

"But you went looking for a fight."

"No." Jo kept her eyes down. "I was looking for them."

Blair knelt in front of her. "You promised to be careful."

"I was careful." Jo looked at her briefly. "I took the bike because the car wouldn't be safe where I was going and I didn't want anything to happen to it."

"That's not the point."

Jo closed her eyes and deflated a little more. "I'm sorry."

"Did you think it would be all right if I didn't find out?"

"No."

"So are you going to tell me or am I going to pry it out of you lie by lie?"

Jo's head throbbed more. "I'm sorry," she repeated, and took a deep breath. "Every night," she admitted.

"Every night?"

"Yeah, and it was all right until tonight. Just, you know, them. Except tonight. Tonight I was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Where?"

Jo said the name of the bar.

"Were you trying to get killed?" Blair exploded. She read the weekly paper. That bar was the police force's reason to exist. They were called out there every weekend and plenty of weeknights, too. "Why did you go there?"

"Been everywhere else," Jo answered sullenly.

"Where is everywhere else?"

'This is worse than Ma,' Jo thought miserably, but began naming every bar within a 25- mile radius of the school.

"So every night that I was gone, you got on your motorcycle, went to a bar, and tried to get into a fight."

"No, I wasn't lookin' for a fight. I just wanted to play pool. But they were there, and you know how that goes. I only wanted to play pool tonight, but one of those fat slobs grabbed my ass."

"Every night," Blair repeated.

Jo dropped her head again. "Yeah."

Blair stood up. She backed up until her legs hit her bed, then sat. "You promised, Jo."

"I'm sorry. I won't do it again."

There was silence for a long time. Jo continued to stare at the floor. Blair watched her while she thought. "Look at me," she said after a few minutes.

Jo slowly raised her throbbing head.

"If you ever lie to me again, we're finished. I trusted you, Jo, and if I can't believe you, we can't be together."

Jo nodded.

"Get ready for bed," Blair said in a gentler tone.

Jo slowly got up and got her pajamas from under her pillow. She went to the bathroom without saying anything. She was in there a while. It took time to remove her boots and shredded jeans. She sat on the tub, feet in it, and poured peroxide over her knees, and cleaned that up. The full-length mirror on the door showed bruising on her torso and back, and Jo knew she would be sore and stiff in the morning. That was the least of her worries, though. Blair was angry, justifiably angry. It wasn't going to go away overnight.

She gathered her clothes and returned to the bedroom. Blair changed into her nightgown while Jo was gone, and sat in her bed, blankets covering her legs. She watched Jo put her boots in the closet, jeans in the trash, and other clothes in the hamper. Jo stood beside Blair's bed. "I'm sorry," she repeated.

"Good night," Blair answered. Waiting for sleep, Blair looked over at Jo and sighed. She hadn't meant to be so harsh, but seeing Jo beat up again frightened her. There were too many things all ready that could take Jo from her. Why did the other girl have to seek them out?

* * *

><p>Jo decided they would celebrate Blair's birthday on both the weekend before and after. Their spring schedules were a little easier. Softball games were usually after school during the week. Debates were usually on Wednesday nights, so they had Friday and Saturday nights to themselves.<p>

On Friday night, they went to the movies. Jo ignored the vampire they passed on the way out, and breathed a sigh of relief when it didn't attack her. Saturday night, they dressed up and drove to New York to see the ballet. Jo was bored, but Blair loved it.

Blair's birthday was on Tuesday. She got flowers from both parents and Jo, who also gave Blair a pair of earrings.

The next weekend, Jo took Blair to dinner at her favorite local restaurant on Friday, and got Mrs. Garrett to give them both Saturday off. The weather was fine, and they rode Jo's motorcycle away from Eastland with no set destination. They picked up sandwiches and drinks, and Jo followed signs to a state park. Despite the beautiful weather, the park was empty, and they sat at a picnic table to eat and, afterward, neck. They rode back to Eastland, stopping for dinner on the way.

They agreed, before getting into bed, that it was nice to have back-to-back weekends without Jo getting into a fight.

"It won't last," Jo predicted.

* * *

><p>When Blair hugged Jo goodbye at the end of the term, she did it in their room, where no one could see her hand slide down to pull Jo firmly against her body. "Promise me you'll be careful."<p>

"I promise," Jo said, stunned that her voice worked at all. They were the same height, and Blair's embrace meant they were touching in a way that only ever precluded sex for Jo, and her body was on fire. They had kissed a lot, and petted a little, but Blair had never held her like this, as close as they could get.

"And call me," Blair instructed.

Jo nodded, and then she kissed Blair. She couldn't wait any longer. The pressure of Blair's body against hers and Blair's hands, one on her butt, the other between her shoulders, keeping her in place, made it hard to think about anything else.

On kiss turned into a dozen. "I don't want to go," Blair whispered.

"I know." Jo kissed her cheek, still trying to get her breathing back to something normal.

"You'll call me?"

"I'll call," Jo promised, and kissed her again.

Jo called every week. Blair called her, but usually got nothing at the other end. Jo worked the same two jobs her mother did, busing tables and cleaning, and on nights she didn't work, searched for vampires_._

They weren't hard to find. At night, they followed people to those places where they became careless. During the day, they hid in the same squats as junkies. Jo got better at spotting them, better at trailing them, better at robbing them, better at fighting them, better at staking them.

When she was late calling Blair one week, the phone woke her up, and Jo struggled from bed to answer it. Last night's fight was extra brutal. Her own fault, Jo freely admitted. She charged in without doing her reconnaissance, and paid for it with a beating like she hadn't had before. She staked them all, the whole nest, but it was a near thing, and when Blair heard her evasions, she told Jo she was on the way and hung up the phone.

Jo staggered to the couch and stayed there to wait. It was closer to the door, and half an hour later, she buzzed Blair in, and opened the door when she knocked. "Hey," she croaked through a black eye and fat lip, fingerprints obvious on her neck.

Blair's eyes were wide, but she closed the door and hugged Jo, gently but firmly. "Have you eaten?" she asked, knowing that always made Jo feel better.

Jo shook her head slightly. She stayed in Blair's arms, her own around the other girl, happy she was there.

"Take a shower and I'll fix you something to eat." Blair kissed her forehead, her lips brushing across the bruised scrape there. "Go on," she encouraged, dropping her arms, and Jo did.

She felt better after the shower, and better still after eating, and better still when she woke up much later, her head on Blair's lap. "Hey."

"Feel better?" Blair put her book aside.

"Yeah."

"It's getting late. I should go."

Jo sat up slowly. "If you have to." She tried and failed to mask her disappointment with indifference.

"I don't want to."

Jo looked at the floor. "Can you do me a favor?"

"Anything."

"I need to show you something." Jo stood up.

Blair followed her back to her room. Jo went to a drawer and opened it, and when she turned around, handed Blair a wad of cash.

"What is this?" Blair asked.

"Thought you'd recognize your favorite color."

"I know it's money. Where'd you get it?"

"Let's just call it a transaction fee and leave it at that."

"Jo," Blair pressed.

"I took it from them."

"Why?"

"What are they gonna do with it?"

"What do you want me to do with it?"

"I dunno, take care of it. Whatever it is that rich people do with their money so it makes more."

"There's paperwork involved."

"Fine," Jo huffed. "If you don't wanna."

"No," Blair interrupted. "I'm just saying, there's paperwork involved."

"Whatever you need to do. And if anything happens, you make sure Ma gets it."

"If what happens?"

Jo looked at her, but didn't say anything.

"Oh." It was a small sound, Blair thought as it came out, too small to encompass all of the awful things she imagined. "I'll call you when the papers are ready," she choked out and turned to leave.

Jo didn't let her go. She stopped her and turned Blair into a hug. "Nothin's gonna happen," she said roughly, and held Blair until they were both calm. "Where's your ride?" she asked.

"I need to call."

Jo walked Blair to the phone, her hand in the middle of Blair's back while Blair called. They went downstairs to wait, sat on the stoop holding hands.

"Call me tomorrow," Blair said while Jo closed the door, relieved when she saw Jo nod just before the door separated them.

* * *

><p>A week later, Jo took the subway to Manhattan. They met for lunch. Blair picked someplace where there wouldn't be looks or comments about Jo's appearance. Not that she cared what anyone thought. Jo was gorgeous in jeans and a Yankees shirt, slouching toward Blair, green eyes admiring her form. "You look better," Blair said.<p>

"You look great."

"And you're feeling better, too."

"Oh yeah."

"I couldn't get a reservation, and Mother has some charity thing."

"Whatever."

"I got sandwiches. We can eat in the park," Blair suggested.

"Perfect." Jo held out her hand, and Blair handed over the deli bag, heavy with food and drinks. "Great day for a picnic."

"I didn't bring a blanket."

Jo laughed. "We'll find a bench or something."

They found a small concrete bench. Jo straddled it and began unpacking the bag. They ate, falling easily into conversation about what they'd been doing, and what the rest of the summer held.

Blair held back dessert until the paperwork was complete. There was an entire pile of forms that Jo needed to sign, and by the time she finished, Jo was heartily sick of her name. Blair explained each as she put it down, and Jo listened, but she didn't care. Blair would take care of it, and that was all she really needed to know.

They ate dessert, and walked through the park for a while, but Jo had the dinner shift and needed to go.

* * *

><p>They met twice more during the summer. Jo came downtown and spent the day in the Museum of Modern Art with Blair. Blair went to the Bronx one Saturday for a street fair. She met some of Jo's friends there, and later wondered what the difference was between Jo and them. There was one, and it was obvious that Jo, while accepted, no longer belonged there. Both times, Jo handed her another wad of cash. Jo was unmarked, smiling, held the hand that Blair offered, so Blair took a deep breath and kept trusting Jo, who called when she said she would, even on her break from work if she had to.<p>

School started again. They had the same room, away from the other students, even though they weren't working in the cafeteria this year. Other students cared less about them, and they went to after-game celebrations and ate with Jo's teammates in the cafeteria.

What didn't change was the number of demons. Nearly every night they went out, Jo fought a vampire, sometimes two. She got in the habit of handing over what she garnered to Blair. She had no idea what happened to the money. The jewelry she sold, stopping at different pawnshops on their Saturday outings, and kept those funds.

Despite Jo's pleading, they had to spend the Thanksgiving break apart. Blair would be in New York, Jo in Boston. Rose wanted Jo to spend some time there, looking at colleges and visiting family, because she would be working nearly the entire time and still didn't quite trust Jo not to get in trouble, even if she was in Manhattan with Blair for the long weekend.

Jo and Blair said goodbye in their room, both determined not to cry. It's only a few days, they told each other. We've been apart longer. And Jo should at least look at the colleges in Boston. MIT sounded good to her, especially since Blair's heart was set on Wellesley, and if Jo went to school in Boston, they'd be close to each other.

Jo spent the train ride daydreaming about Blair and what they were moving toward.


	5. Chapter 3A

And I'm juggling all the thoughts in my head  
>I'm juggling and my fear's on fire<br>But I'm listening as it evolves in my head  
>I'm balancing on one fine wire<br>_One Fine Wire_

Blair unpacked and looked over her schoolwork, and waited for Jo to return. She was still waiting at 11 p.m., when she prepared for bed, and lay down looking at the empty bed next to hers.

Blair worried when Jo didn't return to the school Sunday night. When Jo missed her Monday classes, Blair called Jo's mother to find out why. Jo was missing, Rose told her. She left her uncle's home Friday afternoon and didn't return. She left all of her things. Blair said nothing to the facts that were presented. She nodded, trying at the same time to process the information and think of a way to help. After a week with no news, Blair called her father. They talked for a while before Blair got to the point.

"What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"Help me find her, Daddy."

"Why is this so important?" he asked after a pause. He had a good idea what was going on between his daughter and this girl. His security people kept an eye on Blair from a discreet distance, but he wanted her to tell him.

"She's my friend, Daddy. I love her."

"This is a lot to do for a friend," he pushed.

"I love her," Blair repeated. She took a deep breath. "She's my girlfriend."

"Are you sure about this, Blair?"

"Positive."

"So the next time Ken hints that Kenny needs an escort?"

"I'm busy with Jo."

"All right." David took a few seconds to consider the options. "I'll put some people on it."

They traded information, and he agreed that Blair would get regular reports.

Every month, Blair received a single sheet of paper that said nothing changed. Jo made it to the mall, was later seen at Denney's with an unknown woman, and disappeared. Each time she received a report, she slept in Jo's bed, inhaling Jo's dissipating scent. She refused to cry. Tears were an admission that she didn't expect Jo to return, and that was something Blair would not admit.

* * *

><p>Jo's thoughts of Blair evaporated when she walked into the terminal and found the entire Boston Polniaczek clan waiting for her. She was passed around for hugs before they even considered heading to the car.<p>

Jo found herself sharing a room with her cousin Anna. She was glad Anna was the only girl, because it meant she had her own room. A fold-up cot waited for her there, and Jo dropped her backpack onto it and went to the kitchen to see if she could help.

Instead, her aunt made her sit at the table and answer endless questions about school. When the meal was ready, her uncle and cousins charged in, and the conversation shifted off of Jo, for which she was grateful. She wasn't allowed to clean up, either, as each of the boys had a different job to do.

She spent the day watching football, and took a brief break to play touch football with the boys in the back yard. Then it was time to eat again, and Jo fell asleep in front of yet another game. A few hours later, her aunt roused everyone to eat again, and after that, Jo went to bed.

On Friday, Jo slept in. After a late lunch, she decided to do some shopping. She had no idea what to get either Blair or her mother for Christmas, and wanted to look around. Jo walked the two miles to the nearest mall in 20 minutes. The trip took her past two cemeteries, one where a burial was taking place.

The mall was insanely crowded, but Jo didn't mind. She wandered from store to store, considering some of the things she saw, but none of them really seemed right. By the time she was tired of the crowds, it was dark.

Jo thought nothing of walking in the dark, until she neared the cemetery and that odd tingling sensation started on her neck. "Fuck," she swore vehemently after reaching for her stake and finding it gone. She'd packed it in her bag, but forgot to get it out. She started walking faster.

It didn't help. Jo heard footsteps behind her, and turned to face her pursuer. She immediately recognized the yellow eyes and prominent brow. She didn't have any trouble with the fight, except being unable to end it.

A voice called, "Catch," and Jo looked up in time to pull a wooden stake from the sky. She punched it into the man's chest, and as the others had, he disintegrated into ash. Jo, expecting it, stepped back.

"Very good," the woman said, and Jo turned to look at her.

"Uh, thanks," she said nervously, and tried to return the stake.

"Keep that. It's your best tool."

"Excuse me?"

"You have no idea what just happened." The woman sounded amused.

"No, I have a pretty good idea of that. It's you I'm worried about."

"I'm no threat to you, Slayer."

"I really wish people would quit callin' me that."

"It's who you are."

"No, it's not." Jo started walking.

"How many have you destroyed?"

"I dunno," Jo said, and stopped again. "How many are there?"

"More than either of us can count."

"So what's the deal?"

"Come with me, and I'll tell you."

"No way."

"You need to know what you are."

"No, I need to get home."

The woman looked her up and down. "Come with me," she repeated.

"Unh unh. You can tell me right here."

"It's going to take some time."

"Then you can meet me at Denney's." Jo started walking back toward the mall.

The woman was waiting at the entrance when Jo arrived, and they sat at a booth without saying anything. "Order what you want," the woman said.

"Let's start with introductions."

"I'm Catherine Pierson, a member of the Watcher's Council. You are Joanna Polniaczek, the newest Slayer."

"So you know my name."

"I know a great deal about you."

"How about sharin' so I know somethin' about you."

"In time."

The waitress came and took their orders, and Catherine told her to double Jo's request.

"Spill, all ready," Jo demanded.

"Into each generation a Slayer is born. One girl in all the world, a Chosen One. One born with the strength and skill to fight the vampires, to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their numbers."

"Get out."

"It's true. You are that girl. You've all ready staked one of the monsters."

"So?"

"How can you doubt your own experience?"

"Whaddya want?"

"I'm a Watcher. My job is to train you, help you survive."

"And if I don't want help?"

"You don't understand. This isn't optional. You are part of something larger than yourself. You have a gift, and a calling to use it."

Jo stared at her while the waitress put plates on the table.

As soon as the waitress left, Catherine continued. "You are special. You are the only one who can do this."

"You're outta your mind."

"I know it's difficult to accept. When you finish eating, I will show you."

"I'm not goin' anywhere with you."

"We won't have to go any further than the parking lot. You know they're out there. You feel their presence."

Jo, all too aware of the faint prickle on her neck, said nothing. She focused on the food. Catherine watched her. As soon as Jo finished, Catherine said, "Whenever you're ready."

"May as well get it over with." Jo slid out of the booth and followed Catherine to the cash register. She waited while Catherine paid the bill, then followed her out to the parking lot.

They went around the building and found a girl around Jo's age lurking by the dumpster. Although she looked harmless, Jo's senses told her she was anything but. The girl didn't bother trying to make conversation. Her face changed and she attacked, and in two minutes was blowing away.

"Believe me now?" Catherine asked, suppressing a smile.

"Yeah, but I'm still not goin' anywhere with you. I got stuff to do." Jo walked past her.

"I'm not asking, Joanna."

Jo didn't waste time looking over her shoulder. She started running, but after a few steps felt a sharp prick in her calf. "What the?" she thought, and staggered a few steps before stumbling into the hood of a car she swore wasn't there before. Her head fell forward and she passed out.

Two large men dressed in suits and overcoats got out of the car and easily put Jo into the back seat. Catherine got in with her and pulled the dart from Jo's calf.

* * *

><p>Jo woke in a strange room with a hangover worse than any she had before. She looked around cautiously, and was happy to see there was no evidence that anyone shared the bed with her. Sitting up took time, her head spinning, and for several minutes Jo remained still.<p>

The door opened and Catherine entered. "You're awake. Good."

"What did you do to me?"

"The facilities are through that door. There are clothes in the dresser and closet."

"I don't know what game you're runnin', but I'm not playin'."

"It's not a game, and you don't have a choice. You are the Slayer, and you will do your duty."

"Whaddya gonna do if I don't?"

"You won't like the consequences."

"You don't scare me."

"Good. I don't wish to frighten you. Get cleaned up and join me in the dining room." Catherine left the room, and Jo swung her legs out of the bed.

The shower cleared away the grogginess, leaving her with a slight headache. She looked through the dresser and closet. Everything was her size, but the colors other than black were dark. She dressed and combed her still damp hair one more time before leaving the room.

The smell of food pulled her through the apartment. It reminded her of Blair's, spacious with a great view that Jo didn't recognize, but more traditional furnishings. Jo found the dining room table, where Catherine waited.

"Come and eat before we begin."

"How do I know there's nothin' in there?"

"I do not need an incapacitated Slayer."

Jo took her seat, and Catherine piled food onto a plate from the serving dishes. She watched Jo eat, and refilled her plate and glass twice before Jo finished.

"Your training begins today."

"I don't want training. I wanna go home. My Ma's gonna be worried."

"You're not going home. You have a sacred duty, and you will fulfill it."

"No, I don't."

"You do, Joanna, and you will. As I said, there are consequences."

"What, you gonna take me from my family? Oh, wait, you all ready did that."

"Your mother could lose her jobs. Your cousins might disappear. Your girlfriend could have an accident."

Jo stared, not believing what was being said.

"Their safety is contingent on your behavior."

In one motion, Jo stood and threw herself at Catherine, reaching for her throat. Moments later, she was rigid, and hit the floor with a thump. Catherine watched her impassively for several seconds before kneeling and pulling the taser barbs from Jo's torso. Catherine returned to her seat to watch Jo recover.

It took about two minutes for Jo to sit up. "What the fuck did you do to me?" she asked.

"Return to your seat."

"Fuck you."

"Do you need another demonstration?"

"I need to go home."

"You are home. Return to your seat."

Jo pushed up off the floor and picked up the chair she'd knocked down when she charged her Watcher. She sat and glared at Catherine.

"There's no reason to make this harder than it has to be, Joanna." When Jo didn't answer, Catherine continued. "Your training begins today. We will train during the day and patrol at night."

Jo continued silently stare. Catherine stood up. "Come with me."

"No."

"Listen carefully to me. You will do as you are told, or you will be punished. If you continue to resist, we can and will do whatever it takes to gain your assent, including bringing harm to those you love. Should things reach that level, you will see exactly what happens to them."

Jo struggled against the impulse to attack her again. She wasn't afraid of what would happen to her, but the thought that her mother or Blair would be hurt while she looked on helplessly brought her to her feet, and she followed Catherine from the room.

Catherine kept Jo on the go for 16 to 18 hours a day. Training was rigorous, and included a morning run, martial arts, combat skills, and weapons training. Jo took a great deal of pleasure in pummeling Catherine and the men she brought in to assist with Jo's development. If not for the circumstances, Jo would have enjoyed her lessons. She knew she was getting faster and stronger. She learned which weapons to use when, and how to kill the demons she regularly encountered. She read the handbook Catherine gave her, her name embossed in gold on the leather cover. Most of it was boring and annoying, but Catherine expected her to know it, so she learned.

Jo resented the lectures, the constant repetition that her duty comes first, ahead of anything, everything that Jo might have ever wanted; that doing her duty keeps those she loves safe, just like it protects those she doesn't; that Jo is part of something bigger than herself, part of history and will be remembered, but only if she does what she is destined to do. When Jo asked what that is, Catherine can't answer. She told Jo to read history, the tales of the Slayers before her, but the things those stories tell Jo aren't the things Catherine wants her to learn. Those girls are brave, heading out to face whatever form evil took, knowing it would probably kill them.

Jo didn't feel brave. Mostly she's angry, and vampires catch the brunt of it. She brawled, not caring that she left herself open to injury. There's no one to care. Catherine called instructions to her, sighed when she ignored most of them, and patched her up afterward. "Always keep up your guard," she instructed through ice packs and stitches and poultices. "Pay attention to your surroundings. Use what's around you. Trust your instincts. Listen to your informants." Her voice was a cicada buzz to Jo, but the lessons sank in.

Every night, they patrolled in and around Cleveland. Jo wasn't certain which was worse, the change in the city after dark or the things they removed. Twice a week, they drove to a large, wooded area southwest of the city. Jo didn't understand the attraction of the area to demons but there was always something there to be hunted and slayed. She didn't like the area at all. The constant silence creeped her out, but other than that, she didn't know why she was uncomfortable. Catherine always stayed with her, and they always walked entire perimeter of the clearing in the center of the woods. When Jo asked why, Catherine told her they were keeping an eye on things, and didn't respond to additional questions.

Patrol became a routine, no matter where in the city she went. Cemeteries first, then places people congregated. If Catherine learned about a vampire nest, they would go there last, after the demons were driven indoors by the sun.

After every patrol, while Jo ate, Catherine critiqued her performance. Then Jo showered and fell into bed, where she slept without moving until Catherine woke her. One week became two, then three, and Jo tried to leave. She wanted Christmas with her mother and Blair. She managed to slip away from Catherine during patrol, and ran for the bus station.

At the Ohio border, the bus was pulled over by the state police. Jo was removed from the bus, handcuffed, and placed in the patrol car. When the trooper wasn't looking, she broke the cuffs apart and kicked the door open. Jo vaulted the guardrail and scrambled up the hill. She heard something whiz by one ear, then felt a sharp sting in her thigh. Before she finished reaching back to see what it was, Jo landed face first in the dirt.

When she woke up, she felt awful. Her head ached and her mouth was dry. Catherine slowly came into focus. She leaned forward in her chair. "Welcome back," she said pleasantly.

Jo groaned.

"Did you really think you could just leave?"

"Yeah." Jo knew she was busted, and there was no point in lying.

"Learned your lesson?"

"Yeah." Jo was resigned.

"I want to believe you, Joanna."

"I won't do it again," Jo croaked, unsettled by her Watcher's tone.

Catherine looked at her for nearly a minute. Jo stared at the door.

"Get some rest," Catherine said finally. She stood up and went to the bed side. She adjusted the covers over Jo and smoothed her hair.

The unsolicited kindness of the gesture stunned Jo. She closed her eyes, but couldn't shut off her brain. This was her life now, and she couldn't see a way out of it. It wasn't what she planned. They, she and Blair, were supposed to do things together. They were supposed to graduate from Eastland, go to college. And after that, they were supposed to have their entire lives in front of them. They hadn't talked about it much, because being 17 meant they didn't have to, and now, they couldn't.

Jo turned onto her side and saw something on the nightstand. She reached out and pulled it back. It was a photo of Blair, her arm in a sling, both eyes blackened, a bandage on her forehead. Blair looked tired and in pain, and Jo ignored how bad she felt and got out of bed. She staggered from her room to Catherine's office.

"What the fuck is this?"

"You should be in bed."

"What. Is. This." Jo screamed.

"I told you, Joanna. Your actions have consequences."

"What did you do to her?"

"Miss Warner had a minor automobile accident."

Jo slid down the doorframe to the floor. She knew it wasn't an accident, that Blair was hurt because of her. Rage brought her back to her feet. "If anything else happens to her, I'll kill you."

"What happens is entirely up to you."

Jo ignored her and returned to her room. She slammed the door as hard as she could, and immediately regretted it as pain speared through her head. She got back into bed and stared at the photo of Blair until she fell asleep again.

Christmas was hard. Jo wanted it to be just another day, and pointedly ignored all of the decorations, even the tree in their living room. She felt like a cheat when Catherine had gifts for her and she had none in return, but Catherine was unconcerned. The gifts, for the most part, are nothing special. Gloves. A crossbow. The coat, though, was a thing of beauty. It was a size too large, but the pockets inside explained that. Heavy black leather. Jo was certain that as time went on, she would find other things that made it special, but that day was far in the future.

New Year's was hard, too. Couples all around her while she worked the edges of the downtown crowd, and she missed Blair. At midnight all the church bells tolled and fireworks lit the sky and all Jo could think was that she and Blair should be in Times Square, in their own pocket of bliss.

After three more months, Jo was permitted to patrol alone. She didn't try to run again. Every time she thought about it, she looked at the picture of Blair. If staying away was what it cost to keep her out of danger, Jo would swallow her feelings to keep Blair safe.

She hated Cleveland. She especially hated the red light district that demons loved. The cops didn't care how many hookers were killed or disappeared, as long as the rest of the city was left alone. Jo sympathized with most of the prostitutes, recognizing others caught up in something they had no control over. She continued taking things from the vampires before staking them, and was constantly amazed that they always seemed to have money. Jewelry was easy to sell on the street, and Jo kept the cash she collected in her coat until it became too obvious. Then she began to stash it in a duffel bag in her room, one that was supposed to be for weapons, but which she kept packed in case the day came that she could escape.

Jo and Catherine settled into a respectful working relationship. Catherine was kinder than Jo expected her to be, but Jo kept the photo of Blair with her all the time. Any time she was tempted to treat Catherine as anything other than her boss, she looked at the picture and the feeling passed. The only request she ever made for anything beside work gear was for a subscription to the New York _Times_. The first time she saw Blair's photo – she stood beside Monica at some charity event, smiling – Jo was able to relax a little. Blair was safe, healthy, and still beautiful, and seeing her made the ache of their separation physical.

When Blair's birthday approached, five months after Thanksgiving, Jo couldn't let it pass unrecognized. She bought a card and stamp at the 24-hour pharmacy, and found in one of the pawnshops a pair of earrings she knew the other girl would adore. They reminded Jo of the stars she hadn't seen in months, had never seen as clearly as she did walking the school grounds with Blair. She sat in a diner, sipping coffee and struggling with what to say. She borrowed a pen from the waitress and wrote a brief note inside the card.

_Happy birthday, Blair! Sorry I can't be there. I just want to let you know that I'm all right. It's a long story, and I can't tell it, but I'm ok. Please don't tell anyone about this, because I can't come back. I miss you. Take care._

She hesitated before signing _Love, Jo_. She didn't hesitate before dropping it in a mailbox.

* * *

><p>Blair recognized Jo's handwriting on the envelope, and her heart beat faster. She went to her, their room. She sat on her bed and studied the envelope while she tried to calm her nerves. The Cleveland postmark gave her hope that Jo could be found.<p>

After a few minutes, she opened the envelope. She set aside the small wad of tape and tissues to look at the card. Jo's message raised her hopes. Jo didn't leave voluntarily, and she hadn't been killed by a vampire, and she missed Blair.

Blair traced Jo's signature with her index finger until tears blurred her vision too much to see it clearly. She wiped her eyes and turned her attention to the curious package. She pulled it apart and found inside a pair of gold filigree earrings with tiny diamonds scattered through the metalwork. They reminded her of stars and their nights together, and Blair smiled through her tears, remembering Jo's amazement at the beauty of the night sky and the stories it held.

She took a few moments to compose herself, then changed her earrings and went into the bathroom to wash her face. She went to the kitchen and called the man in charge of her search for Jo. Someone from his office was at Eastland a few hours later. He photographed the envelope and promised they would renew their efforts. The zip code the envelope was sent from narrowed their search.

The next month's report continued her frustration. Jo was seen regularly in the worst part of town. The report stressed that Jo was not working as a prostitute, but they couldn't determine what, exactly, she was doing. They hadn't actually seen her, only heard reports of her presence. No one was willing yet to admit anything other than they recognized her.

* * *

><p>A month later, Jo noticed an increase in the number of vampires on the streets despite the longer hours of sunlight. She dutifully reported her observations, and Catherine accompanied her on patrol the next night. Afterward, Catherine skipped her assessment of Jo's performance to bury herself in books. For the next two months, Jo came home exhausted and battered after struggling against more vampires than usual. Catherine read and studied. She was at her desk when Jo got up, and still there when Jo went to bed. Jo was so busy fighting vampires that she wasn't able to pay attention to her street friends' warnings that people were looking for her, flashing photos during the day, asking by her title at night.<p>

Catherine went with her on patrol again, directing Jo toward the port. In the dim light between the warehouses, Jo saw the most horrific thing she'd ever seen.

It started as a routine fight. Jo fought silently, ducking, kicking, and punching until she staked four vampires. Catherine took out two more with a crossbow, but Jo paid her no mind until she heard her scream.

"So this is what it takes to get your attention, Slayer," he rumbled.

Jo looked at him and blinked. He couldn't be human. She couldn't imagine he had ever been human by the way he looked. He didn't even have fingers, but he managed to hold Catherine immobile. "You want me, let her go."

"You do not dictate the terms of your surrender."

"Let her go."

"I think not." He, _it_, jerked at Catherine's arm, and the woman screamed. A moment later, he threw the arm aside.

Jo stood frozen, watching the blood spurt, wondering if she would vomit, when Catherine's other arm left her body. A foot was next, then the other, and her Watcher, somehow, was still alive, still screaming.

The sound stopped when it separated her head from her body. Jo did vomit then, and heard it laughing. Her instincts kicked in as it approached, and she fought with everything she had. It laughed at her best efforts, until she got a lucky strike that left her stake in its eye.

It fell to its knees, howling, and Jo took advantage of that to run. She headed back to the apartment, running on instinct and adrenaline, to get the duffel bag that held the bulk of her cash hidden among the rolled up clothes. She went through the apartment, gathering weapons, and stopped at Catherine's desk.

A book sat open on it, with a picture of the thing that…That thing. Its name in was in English beneath the Greek characters, and Jo memorized it. There was an envelope there, too, with Jo's name on it, and she opened it hesitantly.

_If you are reading this, Joanna, then you have done everything right. You survived meeting The Worst of the Worst. There is money in the drawer. Take it and go to Sunnydale, California. Find Rupert Giles and Elizabeth Summers. They will help you._

_If you only wounded him, you must hurry. He is strong and ruthless, and he will find you. He will never stop looking until he is dust. _

_I believe in you, Joanna. Have faith in your abilities and face your destiny without fear._

Jo carefully returned the letter to its envelope and put it in her jacket. Then she searched the desk for the cash. She found a large manila envelope with her name, and dumped the contents onto the desk. There were two bundles of cash and a third of documents. Jo found US and British passports for herself, her birth certificate, her New York license, and another from Ohio. She slid the Ohio license and some cash into her wallet. The other papers went into the same interior pocket as the letter, the remaining cash into another one. She picked up her bag and headed out the door.

* * *

><p>Jo disappeared again, evaporated like a puddle after a summer rain shower, frustrating Blair, who'd hoped that she and Jo could spend the summer together. She had been certain that Jo would be found, and her disappointment weighed on her as she sat on Jo's bed and stared silently out the window for hours.<p>

She thought about all the things they should be doing together, and all they had done, and felt as alone as she had the very first time her mother packed her off to boarding school. Blair made a point of remembering something about Jo and writing it in her diary every night. She stood at the window most evenings and looked out, remembering Jo's arms around her, the tickle of her breath across Blair's ear, the weight of Jo's chin on her shoulder.

Before leaving school for the summer, Blair packed Jo's remaining things and took them home with her. Over the summer, Blair did what was expected of her. She went to the country club, smiled when expected, and spent her free time missing her girlfriend. Each evening, she came home, showered, and slipped into bed with one of Jo's shirts. She spent a month with her father, trailing him around the world as he went to meetings. Blair soaked up the knowledge that was offered, learning to differentiate between an honest offer and a bluff, when to speak, and when to remain silent. She discussed what she saw with her father, honing her business and people skills. He didn't ask about Jo, and she didn't offer, but when they received the monthly report, he found Blair and hugged her tightly.

Blair was relieved when summer ended and she returned to Eastland. There she had a routine, and good memories, and the surety that Jo could find her.

* * *

><p>Jo spent the rest of summer and part of autumn on a series of buses. She got little rest, spending the nights she wasn't traveling hunting vampires. It was something she could do to wear herself out in the hope of finding sleep. Sitting on the bus, staring out the window at what passed for scenery left her with too much time to think. To remember Catherine's screams, his laughter, and her own impotence. To realize that it hunted her, knew where to seek her out, and that it would follow.<p>

She wondered how it got photos of her, and how it acquired human minions who knew where to ask about her during the day. It never occurred to Jo that someone else might be looking for her.

On the long rides, she made herself into someone else, and chose a new name. She mentally buried Jo Polniaczek and draped someone else over her corpse.

She rarely stopped in one place for more than two days, and slept for a few hours each day in libraries, parks, or the bus depot. In her wake, she left vampire dust and rumors. She became more each day like her mother feared she would become: Angry, violent, nearly out of control. Jo recognized it and didn't know how to stop what was happening. She had nothing to rely one, no one but herself, and the nightmares that plagued her brief sleep drove home that she wasn't enough. Fast enough. Smart enough. Tough enough. Brave enough. Nothing she had inside was enough. She failed to protect her charges, one through action and the other through inaction, and guilt was her constant companion. It stayed with her no matter what she did to drive it away, and no matter how many she saved, the one she couldn't stayed in the forefront of her thoughts.

Whenever she became homesick or thought about returning to New York, she stared at the photo of Blair until the feeling passed. It was harder and harder to not think about what she was missing, what had been taken from her. Until she was completely on her own, Jo didn't realize how much she took for granted the company of others. Missing Blair remained an ache she didn't know how to cure. Exhaustion didn't work, alcohol didn't, physical pain didn't. She couldn't ignore it, as much as she tried.


	6. Chapter 3B

The bus arrived in Sunnydale in mid-afternoon. Jo was the last one off, and she went immediately to the line of phone booths along one wall, checking each one until she found an intact directory. She found Rupert Giles listed, and memorized his address and telephone number. There were four Summers, but no Elizabeths.

She needed things now, and swaggered into the sunlight to begin getting them. Food first. She hadn't eaten a full meal since Vegas, and hunger gnawed at her. She followed the flow of people and cars, and it led her downtown.

In some ways, it reminded her of Peekskill. It was old fashioned in appearance, but the shops were funky. Jo entered the first restaurant she saw, and left when she realized it only sold coffee and pastry. She spotted a pizza place, and went in. A medium loaded pie later, that problem was out of the way and she went back onto the street, walking a grid until she found the Chamber of Commerce, where she picked up a map.

Jo headed back toward the bus station. The motel she passed on her way into town would do for now. After she scoped things out and got a little more settled, she could find someplace better. She paid for two nights, and once she saw her room, hoped she wouldn't be here that long. It was a step above sleeping rough, and only because it had a working toilet, sink, and shower.

Jo dropped her bag on the bed and stripped. There was plenty of hot water, and it felt good to be clean. The towels were a surprise, clean and relatively fluffy, as were the blindingly white sheets and pillowcases under the questionable comforter. The mattress was softer than she liked, but she had no trouble falling asleep.

She woke at dusk, and dressed for patrol. She pulled her hair back into a ponytail and loaded her jacket with weapons. After considering the neighborhood, she put some of her cash in a front pocket and the rest in one of the many interior pockets of her jacket, a custom-made gift from Catherine to replace the one Blair gave her, one that lasted less than two months of vigorous fighting. This leather was tougher and was barely scuffed, even though one vampire tried unsuccessfully to stab her through it. Plus, it was lighter and just as warm without the lining, and too hot only at the height of summer. Her passports and New York license stayed in one of the smaller pockets, the Velcro® seal unbreached since she put them there.

Jo stopped in at the front desk to ask about places to eat and find some fun. The extremely bored man there sent her to a diner near the college campus and told her about the Bronze. The diner catered to students, and served large portions for a reasonable price.

Her walk to the Bronze kept her on alert. She felt that tingle, her early warning system, every time she went past shadows. She got into the club without problem, and stood looking around before heading to the bar. She couldn't persuade the bartender to sell her a beer, and settled for a soda. She took the drink and found a pillar to lean against and observe.

That tingle started again, and Jo looked around until she found the reason. "Ugh," she muttered, thinking 'what a loser.'

The girl he was leading out through a side entrance had to be desperate, Jo decided as she followed them into the alley. By the time she got there, the vampire had the girl against the wall.

"Hey," she yelled.

"Go away."

"She's not your type."

He looked up at that, his face all ready shifted into the ridges she hated. "And you are?"

"Yeah. C'mon, big boy."

He eyed her and laughed. "You're too scrawny."

"And she's what, 12? C'mon, perv, leave the little girl alone."

"I'll just have two little girls tonight," he said, abandoning his prey.

"Sure. Me first."

Jo played with him, relieving him of his wallet while she repeatedly punched him in the ribs. He surprised her with a kick that sent her into the wall, but she recovered quickly and staked him. She put the stake away, brushed off the dust, and turned to her audience.

"Let me guess," a tiny blonde said. "You're the new Slayer."

"Yeah. Faith," Jo said. "You Elizabeth?"

Xander chortled and Willow giggled.

"I'm Buffy. This is Xander," Buffy pointed, "and Willow," she pointed again. "Welcome to the Hellmouth."

"The what?"

"Time to patrol," Buffy said. "We'll fill you in."

Something about Buffy kept Jo on edge, but she had to admit that the girl knew what she was doing. Her friends knew when to stay out of the way and when to help. As they walked through town, they told her about Sunnydale. Jo listened, but volunteered nothing. She carefully watched all of them, Willow more than the other two. She recognized something in the redhead, but couldn't immediately identify it.

When Buffy decided they were finished with patrol, they left Willow and Xander at their homes. Before separating, Buffy asked Jo to meet them in the Sunnydale High library after school. Jo nodded her agreement, and walked away without saying anything.

At the motel, she showered again and got into bed. She lay awake, restless. It was almost a year since she left New York. Everything in her life had twisted into something she never expected and barely recognized. She was alone again, in a strange place that was nothing like it seemed. The night's patrol made her uneasy. Although Catherine said she would find help here, Jo wasn't certain the other teenagers were it, even if one of them was a Slayer.

Jo flipped the pillow and punched it into what she hoped would be a more comfortable position. Sunnydale was so much warmer than Cleveland. The air conditioner in her rat trap of a room didn't work worth a damn. She had all ready taken one cold shower and contemplated another. The cool water was a relief of sorts, but not nearly enough.

The redhead who hung with the other Slayer was very much on her mind. The way her eyes examined Jo, the flash of jealousy when she and Buffy took off together, made Jo wonder if she had a chance with the girl. It was her first night here, in her new home. She shuddered at that thought, missing her watcher's comfortable apartment, and the room she'd shared with Blair, and her mother's much smaller apartment in the Bronx, where she'd grown up. Jo forced herself to stop that train of thought. None of those things were hers any more, and all the memories did was bring more pain.

But the redhead, Willow, she reminded herself, was someone special. Jo felt pulled toward her, the attraction something other than completely physical, although she could tell that under the baggy clothes, the girl was gorgeous. She wondered why Buffy was blind to Willow's adoration and lust. And that boy with the odd name and the dark eyes, he worshipped Buffy, and the blonde was totally oblivious to that, too. Jo sighed. She was supposed to meet them after school this afternoon, to check in with Buffy's Watcher. She debated with herself about telling them why she came here, and shuddered. She hadn't even been a slayer for a year, and the biggest, baddest vampire she had ever seen dismembered her Watcher in front of her.

Jo sat up and shook her head to clear away those horrible thoughts. She swung her feet to the floor. Another shower, then. Maybe if she could shower long enough, the dirty feeling of failure would be washed away with all the memories she had to surrender to keep the ones she loved – 'past tense,' she reminded herself – safe.

The shower made things worse. The water was no longer cold. For some reason, it was tepid, and felt awful against her skin. Jo swore softly, and pulled the last unused towel from the rack. She dried off, and dressed in black denim and a red tank shirt. After putting on her boots, she impatiently brushed her hair, picked up the room key, and exited, her leather jacket slung over one shoulder, the map in her back pocket.

Everything was fairly close together, and Jo walked through neighborhoods and several parks. She found the beach, and sat there for a while, enjoying the new experience, before heading back into town. She returned to the diner close to the college, where the food was cheap and plentiful, and ate a big meal. By the time she finished, it was time to find the high school.

It made her wistful for Eastland. She thought about Blair for a moment before relentlessly quashing that part of herself. Xander waited on the steps, and got to his feet when she approached. "Hey," he grinned.

"Hey."

"Buffy didn't want you to get lost."

"Lead on."

"Where you from?"

"Nowhere," Jo answered.

"Your accent says otherwise." Xander held the door for her, followed her through, and gestured to the right. "This way. You wanna hang later? I got a Playstation."

"Sure." Jo followed him through the halls.

"This is kinda where we hang out."

"The library."

"That's where the books are."

Giles looked up when the door opened. "Right on time," he smiled at her, waving toward the empty chairs around the table. Buffy and Willow sat on one side of the table, and they both greeted Jo with a smile. Jo put on her best cocky smile. "Miss me?" she asked, pulled out a chair, and turned it around before straddling it.

She tried not to focus on Willow, although seeing the redhead again set her pulse racing. Jo tried to concentrate on what the Watcher was saying, and listened enough to make the correct answers. The meeting seemed to go on forever, and when it broke up, Buffy invited her for dinner. Jo accepted both the invitation and the paper with Buffy's address, phone number, and directions. She and Xander left, and Giles went to his office, leaving just Willow sitting there.

"I'll walk you home," Jo offered, and held her breath while Willow considered the invitation.

"Ok," the redhead finally answered, and Jo hurried to her feet. She spun the chair around and replaced it under the table, and grabbed Willow's backpack before she could pick it up. Jo saw the Willow's curious surprise at the action, but said nothing. "I'll show you where Buffy lives on the way," Willow said.

"Thanks." Jo hurried to hold the door open for Willow. She missed the Watcher's raised eyebrow at their exit together, not that she would have cared much.

"Where are you staying?" Willow asked, mostly to make conversation, but when Jo answered, Willow stopped on the sidewalk. Jo took three steps before realizing Willow wasn't beside her.

"What?"

"You can't stay there," Willow said firmly. "C'mon, we'll get your stuff. You can stay with me."

"What?" Jo said again.

Willow snickered to herself. Apparently being slow on the uptake was a common characteristic among slayers. "I said, you can't stay there. It's really nasty and probably not safe, although I guess you can take care of yourself, but eww, they rent rooms by the hour and saying it's unsanitary is probably a compliment to public toilets everywhere. What?" she added at the end, seeing Jo's amused look.

Jo smiled. Willow was adorable. "Do you do that a lot?"

"Do what?"

"The talking thing. Where you don't stop for air or punctuation."

"Now you're just making fun of me."

"No, I'm not. Honest. It's cute. I like it. I just never heard anybody say that much without breathing." Jo flashed her best charming smile. "I would never make fun of you, Willow."

Willow contemplated for a few moments before accepting Faith's words. She smiled, and Jo felt her heart skip a beat. "All right," Willow said. "But I'm serious. You can stay with me until we get everything figured out."

"Won't your parents mind?" Jo asked cautiously as they turned around to go to the motel.

"They aren't home. Won't be for a while, so I don't think it'll be a problem."

"They just left you at home alone?"

Willow shrugged. "It's no big. They've been doing it since I was 10. I can take care of myself. Not like you can, you know, with slayer strength and all, but I can fix meals and keep the house clean and all that stuff. And I know how to get around at night when I need to. I keep a holy water and a cross in my bag, which is kinda funny since I'm Jewish, and my dad would flip if he knew I carried around a cross, but fortunately he's clueless about what goes on in Sunnydale and I did it again," Willow concluded once she saw the small smile on Jo's face.

"Yeah, but it's all right. I like it. Scout's honor," Jo answered earnestly, raising her right hand.

Willow chuckled. "I somehow doubt that you were ever a scout."

"Well, not technically," Jo admitted. She lowered her hand and grabbed Willow's. She swung their hands gently while they walked.

Willow was surprised into silence. No one ever touched her except Buffy and Xander, and now Faith, who was practically a stranger. Willow worried suddenly that her hand was sweaty, and when she tried to tug it back, Faith held on a little tighter, not tight enough to hurt, but enough to tell Willow that she wanted to hold her hand.

Jo snuck looks at her while they walked, worried by Willow's sudden quiet. "Penny for your thoughts," Jo asked.

"Huh? Oh, nothing important."

"C'mon, must be something. You got all quiet."

"I was thinking about homework," Willow lied.

"Do you have a lot? Cause I was thinking we could maybe go to the Bronze later?" Jo asked hopefully.

"Buffy will probably want you to patrol with her."

"We could go after," Jo suggested.

"We'll see."

The neighborhoods changed for the worse as they walked, until they reached the motel. The parking lot glittered with broken glass, but there was no one in sight as Jo led Willow up the exterior staircase and to her room. Willow suppressed a shudder when they entered. It was worse than she had imagined. The rug was a mosaic of unidentifiable stains, and the smell could most charitably be described as musty. Jo hurried to put her few belongings into the one bag. She turned to Willow, who waited patiently near the open door. "That's it."

"You sure? Cause I so do not want to come back here."

Jo scanned the room once more to be certain. "Yup, that's everything." She dropped the key ring on the dresser. Before she joined Willow near the door, Jo scooped up Willow's backpack and slung it onto her shoulder. Willow was happy to step back onto the balcony while Jo closed the door with her free hand. She held it out waited. Willow just looked at her, confused, until Jo took her hand again. Jo watched the series of emotions run across Willow's face, but couldn't read them. 'Yet,' she added to herself, and started them walking toward the staircase and away from depressing aura that permeated everything there.

While they walked to Willow's house, she pointed out different places and explained their significance to Jo, who was perfectly happy to walk beside Willow and ask the occasional question to keep her talking. They passed Buffy's house, and two blocks later, Willow unlocked the front door of her house. The phone was ringing, and Willow hurried to answer it. Her answers were uncharacteristically brief, and she sighed when she returned the phone to its cradle.

"Buffy," she explained to Jo. "I'm coming to dinner with you."

"Cool," Jo grinned.

"C'mon, I'll show you your room."

Jo followed Willow, and put her duffel on the bed in the room Willow showed her. "Mine's next door," Willow said. She looked past Jo to the clock on the dresser. "We better go to Buffy's now."

"All right," Jo said. She shrugged Willow's backpack onto the bed beside her duffel and followed the redhead, smiling.

"You'll like Buffy's mom," Willow said while they retraced their steps. Faith was holding her hand again, and Willow was getting used to it. She knew she was talking too much, but Faith made her nervous in a way she hadn't ever felt before. She went on about Buffy's mother, and Jo let her ramble. She enjoyed listening to Willow while considering some of the other uses to which her incredible breath control could be put. Jo was certain Willow would really babble if she knew her salacious thoughts, and the idea of finding out made Jo break into a lazy grin.

She behaved during dinner, for Willow, who thought a great deal of both Buffy and her mother. Mrs. Summers was a cross between Jo's mother and Mrs. Garrett. She frowned when Jo told her she was staying with Willow, and Jo saw the look that flashed across Buffy's face, although Willow missed it completely. When Willow told them why Jo was staying with her, Mrs. Summers decided it was the lesser of the available evils, but Buffy's look was again dark.

Willow jumped up to help Buffy clear the table, but Mrs. Summers told Jo that she was a guest. Willow grinned at Jo. "This is my second home, so I get dish duty."

"Never saw anybody happy to clean up before," Jo teased her, and Willow just smiled and added Jo's plate to the pile.

Mrs. Summers asked Jo the usual questions that adults ask, and although some of the answers were unexpected, she carefully kept her face neutral. She made note of things to ask Buffy later, and sent the girls off to patrol as soon as Buffy and Willow finished in the kitchen.

Jo was both thrilled and angry that Willow patrolled with them. On the one hand, it meant more time with the redhead, which made her happy. On the other, it meant she would be in danger, and that didn't. She didn't care that the blonde slayer saw her take Willow's hand, or that she glared when Willow didn't pull away. Jo was careful to keep herself between Willow and the vampires they encountered. She noted Buffy's fighting style, complete with witty banter that made her shudder. Jo didn't want to talk the creatures. She spilled her anger onto them, and missed Willow's concerned look and the one that she shared with Buffy while she beat yet another vampire half to death before staking it.

When they finished patrol, Buffy begged off the Bronze. She pleaded homework, hoping Willow would remain silent, and was both relieved and annoyed when she did. Buffy wrestled with herself all the way to Giles' place, where she told him everything that had occurred that night. He thanked her for her report and sent her on her way.

At the Bronze, Jo coaxed Willow onto the dance floor while the music was loud and fast. She danced around the redhead, who wished that she felt as comfortable in her skin as Faith was in her own. When the music slowed, Willow turned to leave the dance floor, but Jo caught her. She ignored the hiss of her name and Willow's panic. "Hush," she commanded, and was surprised that Willow did.

She didn't pay mind to the tension in Willow's body through the first song. As the second began, she leaned close and said quietly, "Relax. It's all right."

"Girls don't dance together," Willow squeaked.

"Sure they do. We were dancing together a minute ago."

"That was different."

"Why?"

"It just was," Willow answered, although she wondered to herself the real answer to that question.

Jo took advantage of Willow's preoccupation to maneuver her closer. Willow's body followed her own, and brushed against her in the most wonderful ways. She was sorry they separated when the music changed back to a fast beat, and pulled Willow off the dance floor. "It's getting late," she said, answering Willow's unasked question. "You have school tomorrow."

"School, right," Willow answered.

Jo continued to hold her hand as they walked toward Willow's house. Jo found all of her senses on hyperspeed. She was far from tired, and stayed on alert, just in case some stupid vampire decided they looked like the perfect snack. They made it to Willow's without incident, and Willow said goodnight and closed her bedroom door firmly.

Jo smiled to herself. This was the closest to normal, whatever that was, that she'd felt in months. She went into her room, and saw Willow's backpack. She picked it up and went to the adjacent room. She knocked, and waited for Willow to open the door. Jo held out the bag without saying anything. Willow took it and said "Thank you," and closed the door before Jo could finish her "You're welcome."

Jo returned to her room and stripped. She put on panties and an old t-shirt. It was her first night in a new place, and Jo knew she wouldn't sleep much, but laid down anyway and turned on the television, but kept the volume low. Three hours later, she heard Willow whimper. The noises escalated in volume and frequency, and Jo went next door, entering without knocking.

She sat on the bed and stroked Willow's hair. "Shh," she said. "It's all right. It's only a dream."

Willow sat up, eyes open wide. After a few seconds, she blinked slowly and looked at the brunette beside her. "Faith?" she asked.

"You had a nightmare. Go back to sleep."

"Don't leave," Willow asked.

"Ok."

Willow slid over and lifted the covers. Jo got in beside her. She found Willow's hand, and joined it to her own. They laid on their backs. Willow fell back to sleep, and moved until she was snuggled up to Jo. After enjoying the feelings for a few minutes, Jo let herself relax and was soon asleep herself.

* * *

><p>When the alarm went off, Willow tried to reach it, but couldn't. Faith had her pinned to the bed, and Willow had a moment of panic. Then she tried to wriggle free from Faith's grasp. She shifted position, but didn't let go. Willow was able to free her arm and turn off the alarm. Then she contemplated their positions, trying to remember how Faith came to be in her bed.<p>

Not that she minded, Willow realized. Faith smelled like leather and citrus and something earthy. It was a far cry from Buffy, also a champion snuggler, who smelled of vanilla and flowers. As pleasant as it was to stay in bed with Faith, Willow was unsettled by the physical sensations the girl atop her evoked. Plus, it was a school day, so she had to get up and get moving so she wouldn't be late. Willow hated being late so much that she frequently arrived early to avoid it.

She couldn't dislodge Faith despite her efforts and finally resorted to waking her. "What?" Jo demanded grumpily.

"I have to get up for school."

"Nuh unh."

"Uh huh," Willow answered with a giggle. "C'mon, Faith, let me up."

Jo groaned and rolled over. She pulled Willow's pillow over her face to block out the light. Jo wanted to return to the best sleep she'd had in far too long, but it wasn't happening. When Willow returned from the shower, she was sitting up, cross-legged. Willow, clad only in towels, eeped. She thought Faith would be asleep. Instead, she looked Willow over from bottom to top and wolf whistled.

Willow's eyes bugged and she turned deep red, the blush rising from her chest. Jo grinned and slid off the bed. To Willow's relief, she left the room, and closed the door. Willow's brain was flipping in so many directions that she couldn't even begin to get a grip on her thoughts. While she tried, routine took over. She dressed, took care of her hair, and got something to eat. She left a note on the refrigerator - _Make yourself at home_ - before shouldering her backpack and heading off to school.

Her thoughts were still in turmoil, and she passed Buffy's house without going in to wait for her as she usually did. When she got to school, she walked right past Xander without saying anything. It was lunchtime before she came out of her daze and apologized to her friends. "I was thinking," was all she told them.

After school, they met in the library. Jo was there, waiting for Willow, but paying attention to Giles while she waited. She still wasn't sure whether she could trust them with the truth about what drove her to California, despite Catherine's instruction, and was hopeful that she had outrun that part of her past. There wasn't much going on, apart from routine patrols, and when they broke up, Jo grabbed both Willow's backpack and her hand. Buffy and Xander hung back as they watched Willow leave.

Buffy turned to Giles. "I don't like this at all," she announced.

Xander just looked dazed. Buffy wasn't sure whether it was because Willow had ignored him, or Faith had ignored him, or Willow and Faith going off together. She poked him. "Ow," he said and turned to look at her. "And again, ow."

"Will's acting weird."

"I saw."

"We should keep an eye on her."

Giles removed his glasses. "Buffy, give Faith a few days to settle in."

"She's, she's" Buffy tried to protest.

"She's being friendly," Giles said calmly.

"She's being friendly with my Willow."

"She was mine first," Xander added.

Giles rolled his eyes. Teenage hormones and drama came with the job, and were a far greater nuisance than he ever anticipated. "Leave them alone," he instructed firmly, although he knew they would ignore him.

* * *

><p>"How was school?" Jo asked.<p>

"Fine."

"Do you have lots of homework?"

"Not too much," Willow answered cautiously.

"Good."

"Don't you have to patrol?"

"Not until later. You know, dark."

"I know."

"I made us some dinner."

"You can cook?"

"Of course I can cook. If I couldn't, I'da starved."

"Didn't your parents feed you?"

"Yeah." Jo frowned, remembering her mother teaching her to cook because she had to work so much. It was one of the things they bonded over, and one of the few things they didn't fight about as Jo grew up.

Willow smiled and tried to lighten the mood. "I feel special. I mean, I usually eat take out unless Buffy invites me over."

"You are special." Jo squeezed Willow's hand gently. Willow blushed, but said nothing. After giving Willow time to respond, Jo said, "You don't believe me."

"Um, not really."

Jo stopped, forcing Willow to stop, too. "I don't say things I don't mean," she said firmly.

Willow nodded. "All right."

"All right."

They began walking again, but there was no more conversation until they reached the house. "Go do your homework," Jo directed. "I'll call you when dinner's ready."

"Thank you."

Willow went to her room, but left the door open. She ripped through her homework in half an hour, and debated calling Buffy. She decided instead to do some research on the Internet. Faith made her feel hot and tingly, like she felt about Xander sometimes, and more like she felt around Buffy, except much stronger. The first site she found had pictures of naked girls kissing. Willow flushed, but looked at everything closely before clicking on the back button.

'That answers that,' she thought to herself, and continued her search through non-porn sites. She skimmed through a dozen of them, and breathed a sigh of relief at the answers she found, and went on to check her e-mail messages. She finished that and logged off before going to see what Faith was doing in the kitchen.

"Hey," Willow said, so she wouldn't surprise Faith, who was opening and closing cabinet doors.

"Where's the plates?"

"I'll get them." Willow went to the one cabinet Faith hadn't opened and got down plates and glasses. She turned and put them on the kitchen table before closing the cabinet door. She got utensils, napkins and placemats from the drawers under the counter, and finished setting the table with salt, pepper, and margarine. Finally, she poured milk for both of them. "Anything else?"

Jo looked over her shoulder. "Nope." She opened the oven and pulled out a pan containing a chicken and vegetables, then a tray of biscuits. Willow hurried to get her a plate for the chicken, a bowl for the vegetables, and another plate for the biscuits.

Jo put the food on the table and got a knife and fork from the wooden block on the counter before taking a seat. She carved the chicken efficiently, and served Willow before piling food on her plate. Jo ate methodically, stopping only to acknowledge Willow's compliments. There was nothing left by the time she finished eating.

Willow thanked her again for cooking before tackling the dishes. Jo talked while Willow rinsed everything before loading it into the dishwasher. She wiped down the counters, stove, and table, and rinsed the rag before turning to face Jo. Willow leaned against the sink and asked her, "What now?"

"I dunno. What do you usually do?"

"Read. Maybe watch TV if there's something good on."

"TV sounds ok."

"TV it is," Willow decided. She walked past Jo and through the dining room. In the living room, Willow picked up the remote and started moving through the channels. She stopped on a history show about ancient shipwrecks. Jo sat beside her, and when Willow put the remote down, Jo took her hand.

Willow looked from their hands to Jo's face, the show forgotten. "Why do you keep doing this?" she asked, and raised their hands a few inches.

"I like you."

"I like you, too, Faith."

"Yeah?" Jo searched Willow's face, trying to see whether they were talking about the same thing.

"Yeah," Willow answered with a small smile.

Jo moved closer and kissed her. The kiss was nothing like Willow expected, and when Jo began to pull away to end it, Willow followed. Instead of one kiss, it became a dozen before they separated. "Wow," Willow said softly.

Jo grinned. "Wow," she repeated, and moved in for an encore.

They necked throughout the show, and when it ended, Jo forced herself away. "I'm supposed to meet Buffy for patrol."

"All right," Willow said, although her tone said it was anything but.

"I'll be back soon."

"All right," Willow repeated, and Jo took one more kiss before walking out the door.

Jo was whistling when she reached the Summers residence. Buffy sat on the steps waiting for her. "You're in a good mood," Buffy observed.

"Yup." Jo grinned.

Buffy's eyes narrowed as Faith got closer. She could smell Willow all over the other slayer. She told herself that it was because Faith was staying at her house, and asked, "So what you been up to?"

"Nothing much. Fixed dinner for me and Willow, watched some TV. You?"

"Homework. Ugh. And dinner with Mom."

Jo nodded. "What's on tonight's agenda?"

"Just a regular patrol."

"Let's get goin'."

They covered the cemeteries first, then began criss-crossing the alleys. "Didn't we, um, do this street already? Jo asked.

"Funny thing about vamps," Buffy said. "They'll hit a street even after you've been there. It's like they have no manners."

"Mm. You've been doing this the longest."

"I have."

"Yeah. Maybe a little too long."

Buffy looked at Faith. "Excuse me? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing."

"You got a problem?" Buffy demanded.

Jo spread her arms. "I'm five by five, B, living entirely large, actually wondering about _your_ problem," she answered, pointing at Buffy.

Buffy stopped and turned to Faith. "I got an idea: How about from now on, we don't hear from you on anything in my life. Which, by the way, is _my_ life."

"What are you getting so strung out for, B?"

"Why are your lips still moving, F?"

"Did I just hear a threat?" Jo asked belligerently.

"Would you like to?" Buffy asked far too sweetly.

"Wow. Think you can take me?"

"Yeah." Buffy looked over Faith's shoulder. "I just hope they can't."

She shoved Faith aside as a vampire attacked, putting her on the ground while Buffy punched the attacking vampire away and forced the one behind it down, too. Jo got up and grabbed a nearby trashcan. After a third vampire tripped Buffy Behind him, Jo crammed the trashcan down over his head and used it to push him away.

Buffy was back on her feet, and ducked an incoming vampire. She staked him as soon as he landed. Jo's opponent got back up, and she kicked him into a low pipe. Buffy managed to stay ahead of her opponents while Jo concentrated on the one vampire. "My dead grandmother hits harder than that!" she yelled, and continued to beat him.

"Faith! Stake him already and give me a hand!" Buffy yelled. Still another vampire grabbed her by her jacket and threw her to the ground. She landed on her stomach near a piece of wood. The vampire and her original attacker both made a grab for her.

Meanwhile Jo kept beating on her victim. "This is _me_," she yelled while hitting him, "you un," another punch, "dead," another punch, "bastard!"

Buffy reached desperately for the piece of two-by-four in front of her.

"For Kakistos we live! For Kakistos you'll die!" The vampire announced.

Buffy glanced up at him for an instant, then continued clawing for the hunk of wood. She screamed Faith's name, but Jo was lost in the moment. Buffy finally managed to grab the board, and she slammed it into one vampire's face, then kicked the other away. She got up and yelled for Faith again.

Buffy sensed one of the vampires coming from behind, and instinctively turned and jammed the makeshift stake home. The vampire crumbled to ashes. Buffy dropped the hunk of wood, reached into her jacket for a proper stake and finished the third vampire. She headed over to Faith, who continued to beat on the vampire, although it long ago lost the ability to fight back.

"You. Can't. Touch. Me," she yelled, punctuating each word with a blow. She shook the vampire a bit before going back to punching him. Buffy came up behind her, grabbed Jo by the waist and pulled her off him.

Buffy thrust down with her stake and dusted him, then turned to Jo. "What is wrong with you?" she demanded.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about you 'living large' on that vampire!"

"Gee, if doing violence to vampires upsets you, I think you're in the wrong line of work!"

"Yeah, or maybe you like it a little too much."

"I was getting the job done," Jo protested.

"The job is to slay demons! NOT beat them to a bloody pulp while their friends corner me!"

Jo shrugged. "I thought you could handle yourself." She walked off without looking at Buffy.

Buffy let out an exasperated sigh.

* * *

><p>Willow stared at the TV without seeing it. She was thinking about Faith, and how they had kissed - 'made out,' her brain clarified - and how it made her feel. More tingly. Restless. She definitely wanted to kiss Faith again. A lot. Then other thoughts intruded. Who could she talk to about this? What did it mean? Were she and Faith a couple now?<p>

At 11 pm, Willow's routine kicked in. She turned off the television and most of the lights and headed off to bed. She tried to sleep, but drifted in and out of consciousness as she listened for Faith to return.

When Jo came in at 2 a.m., she moved quietly to the kitchen to grab something to eat. That need satisfied, she turned off the lights and went back toward her room. It had a TV set, and she could watch from bed. She stopped in Willow's room first, and watched her sleep for a minute or so before kissing her cheek and telling her, "I'm back."

"K," Willow answered sleepily, and rolled onto her side.

Jo smiled and went to her room. She again put on panties and a t-shirt before sliding into bed. She kept the volume low so she could hear if Willow had another nightmare, and fell asleep watching a black and white sitcom on Nick at Nite. When she woke, the TV was off and a note was taped to the screen. "Dinner's on me tonight," it read, and Willow had put a smiley face instead of a signature.

Jo showered and got something to eat, then did her laundry. While the clothes washed and dried, she flipped through the channels and ended up alternating between cartoons and old game shows. She was bored and restless by mid-afternoon, but decided to wait for Willow to return.

* * *

><p>Buffy and Giles exited the cafeteria and walked toward the library. "What you must realize, Buffy, is that you and Faith have very different temperaments," Giles said, then sipped his tea.<p>

"Yeah, and mine's the sane one." Giles chuckled, but Buffy ignored him and continued. "The girl's not playing with a full deck, Giles. She has almost no deck. She has a three."

"You said yourself that she, she killed one. She's just a plucky fighter who got a little carried away. Which is natural. She's focused on the slaying. She doesn't have a whole other life here, as you do."

"She doesn't need a life. She has mine."

"I think you're being a little"

"No, I'm being a lot," Buffy interrupted. Giles took another sip. "I know that. But she nearly got us both killed. The girl needs help."

"All right. I'll see if I can reach her Watcher at the retreat." He checked his watch. "They're eight hours ahead now. I guess they're probably sitting down to a nightcap." Buffy continued toward the library, but Giles just stood there and stared off into space. "I wonder if they still kayak. I used to love a good kayak. You see, they don't even consider..."

Buffy returned and waited impatiently for Giles to rejoin her. When he realized Buffy was staring at him, Giles said, "Sorry. I digress." They began to walk again. "The, um, vampires that attacked you, can you furnish me with some details that might help me trace their lineage? I mean, ancient or modern dress? Amulets, cultish tattoos?" He paused to sip his tea.

"Uh, no tats. Crappy dressers. And, uh. Oh, the one that nearly bit me mentioned something about kissing toast. He lived for kissing toast."

Giles immediately asked, "You mean 'Kakistos'?"

Buffy squinted while she tried to remember exactly what was said. "Maybe it was taquitos. Maybe he lived for taquitos." She looked at Giles. "What?"

"Kakistos," he repeated, suddenly in a hurry. He entered the library quickly.

"Is that bad?" Buffy asked before following him.

Giles set his things on the counter. "'Kakistos' is Greek. It means the worst of the worst." He went behind the counter. "It's also the name of a vampire so old that his hands and feet are cloven." He went into his office and returned with a book, which he put on the counter. He began to leaf through it.

"Now, this guy shows up, right? Right around the same time my bestest new little sister makes the scene."

Giles looked up and considered Buffy's words. "You think he and Faith are connected?"

"Giles, there are two things that I don't believe in: coincidence and leprechauns."

"Well, Buffy, it's entirely possible that they both arrived here by chance simultaneously."

"Okay, but I was right about the leprechauns, right?"

Giles thought for a moment before answering. "As far as I know, yes."

"Good. Okay, you get England on the phone. I'm gonna talk to Faith, see if 'khaki trousers' rings..."

"Kakistos," Giles corrected.

"Kakistos rings a bell. Or an alarm," Buffy concluded.

"Right."

"Right." Buffy left the library.


	7. Chapter 4A

I remember the time my balance was fine  
>And I was just walking on one fine wire<br>But It's frayed at both the ends  
>And I'm slow unraveling<br>_One Fine Wire_

Willow alternated between euphoria and panic all day. Buffy and Xander watched her mood shifts and looked at each other. In the hall between classes, they decided that Buffy would try first to find out what was going on. She joined Willow in the courtyard during lunch period.

"Hey, Wills."

"Hi, Buff." Willow smiled at her friend and slid over to make room on the bench.

"What's new?"

"Nothing much." Willow unwrapped her sandwich and offered half to Buffy.

"Thanks." Buffy took a bite, and continued after she swallowed it. "How's Faith?"

"She's good. She fixed us a really nice dinner last night."

"That's good. Anything else going on?"

Willow blushed and concentrated on her sandwich. "No," she lied, hating herself for it.

"C'mon, Will, you can tell me," Buffy coaxed.

Willow took a deep breath and thought for a few seconds before deciding she wasn't ready to share with Buffy. "Nothing's going on," she said.

Buffy pouted, but Willow didn't go for it this time. She put her sandwich wrapper back into her lunch bag and removed a banana. She peeled it and broke it in half, then handed one piece to Buffy. Buffy accepted it, and asked, "You feeling all right?"

"Yes."

"You haven't been acting like yourself." Buffy shoved the banana in her mouth and began to chew.

"Who have I been acting like?"

Buffy tried not to choke. Willow normally would apologize. Instead, she was being flip, although her tone was serious.

"I hope it isn't Xander," Willow continued.

"Funny, Will."

Willow shrugged. "You and Faith patrolling tonight?"

"No, Giles wants us to switch up. I go tonight, she goes tomorrow night."

Willow nodded.

"You coming with?" Buffy asked hopefully.

"Not tonight."

The bell rang, and Willow stood up. She dropped the banana peel in the trashcan on her way indoors. "See you in chemistry," she said over her shoulder.

Buffy met Xander in the hall as they walked to English class. "Well?" Xander demanded.

"She's not talking."

"I'll try on the way home."

"Good luck." Buffy followed Xander into class and took her seat.

Xander didn't catch up with Willow on the way home. He got sidetracked by Cordelia, and Willow hurried home instead of stopping in the library.

Jo was sprawled on the couch when Willow arrived, and she sat up. "Hi."

"Hi." Willow slid her backpack off and dropped it by the door. She walked toward the couch.

Jo got up and met her half way. She wrapped her arms around Willow kissed her. "Missed you."

Willow smiled hugely. "Missed you, too." She kissed Jo this time.

They made their way back to the couch. "I never did this before," Willow said.

Jo debated teasing her, but caught Willow's serious tone. She smiled and pushed Willow's hair behind her ear. "Lucky me."

"I just, um, I'm a little confused."

Jo sat back and pulled Willow along. "About what?"

"Us. I mean, is there an us? Or is this just a thing? Buffy was asking all these questions today and I didn't know what to tell her." Willow traced the lines in Jo's palm.

"You want to be my girlfriend?"

Willow looked at Jo. "I'd like that a lot."

"I like it, too." Jo kissed Willow briefly. When they separated, she put her arm around Willow, who put her head on Jo's shoulder.

They stayed like that for 20 minutes or so, before Jo's need to move kicked in. She kissed Willow before standing up.

"Where you going?"

"Nowhere. Just need to move. Been lazy all day."

"You hungry?"

"Gettin' there."

"Wanna go out or get take out?"

"Up to you," Jo said.

"Take out it is." Willow stood up. She went to the kitchen, and Jo followed her. Willow opened one of the drawers and pulled out a sheaf of menus. She presented them to Jo. "Your choice."

Jo flipped through them all first, then picked out the three that interested her most. She finally decided on Chinese, and Willow called in an enormous order.

They had just begun opening cartons when the doorbell rang. Willow answered it to find Buffy and Xander. "Hey, guys."

"Hi, Will." Xander walked in. "Oooh, dinner, I'm starved." He sat on the sofa next to Faith and took over Willow's plate.

"Rude much?" Jo asked.

"Don't mind Xander," Willow said as she closed the door. "Buffy, you want some?"

"Nah, I ate. I could use a drink, though."

"Ok." Willow headed off to the kitchen while Buffy seated herself in one of the armchairs. "Faith."

"B," Jo answered.

"What're you guys up to?" Xander asked.

"Having dinner," Jo said pointedly.

"Good choice," Xander answered, oblivious to her hostility.

Willow returned with drinks for Buffy and Xander, as well as two more plates and forks. She put the drinks down and handed one plate and fork to Buffy before sitting on the floor across from Faith.

Strained silence continued while all four of them ate. Buffy took very little, and only because Willow brought her a plate. Jo and Xander ate most of it. When they finished, Jo gathered all of the trash and took it to the kitchen.

"What brings you guys over?" Willow asked.

"Haven't seen much of you," Xander said. "We're just, you know, checking in."

"Uh huh," Willow answered, without conviction.

Jo returned, and sat on the floor beside Willow. "So, B, what's the what?"

"Just came to visit Will. See if she changed her mind about patrol."

"Nope," Willow answered.

After another long silence, Xander blurted out, "What's going on with you two?"

"What do you mean?" Willow asked innocently while Jo tried not to smirk.

"Will, I haven't seen you since Faith showed up."

"So? I'm not allowed to have friends beside you?"

"No, that's not what I meant. It's just not like you to, uh, take in strays."

"Hey!" Willow and Jo said at the same time.

Xander held his hands in front of him. "No offense." He looked to Buffy for help.

As much as she was enjoying Xander's trip into the minefield, Buffy stepped up. "You know Xander has foot in mouth disease."

"Yeah," he agreed.

Willow sighed. "Look, nothing is going on that you need to worry about. Xander, you need to go home and write your history paper, and Buffy, you need to patrol. I have research to do."

Xander got to his feet. "See you tomorrow."

"Yeah. Good night, Buffy." Willow said.

They let themselves out, and Willow sighed again. "They are acting so weird."

"Jealous," Jo said.

"Stupid's more like it," Willow answered.

"So what's this research you have to do?"

"It involves mapping physiological responses to external stimuli."

"Oh?" Jo looked amused. She had an idea of what Willow had in mind.

"Like this." Willow turned and kissed a line from Jo's ear to the corner of her mouth.

Jo smiled. "Nice. I like it. What else?"

Willow leaned closer and pushed Jo's hair aside. She kissed the length of her neck and back up.

"Very nice. My turn." Jo pulled Willow onto her lap and moved her hair. She kissed around Willow's ear before drawing her earlobe into her mouth and sucking gently. Willow shivered, and Jo smiled, pleased at the response she drew.

After that, the game went out the window. They kissed, twisting against each other until Willow laid on top of Jo, who was sprawled on the floor. Their kisses rose and fell in intensity until they reached a point where Willow rested her head on Jo's shoulder, bunching and releasing the same handful of Jo's thick, dark hair, and Jo repeatedly ran one hand through Willow's hair.

Jo was content to hold Willow and trade kisses. She ignored the little voice in her head that said she was cheating on Blair. Willow was happy to have Faith's attention and affection, and ignored the nagging voice in the back of her mind that told her it was nothing but a passing fancy to Faith, who would tire of her and tell her to go away, like everyone else did. She pushed down and kissed Faith again.

This time, Jo stopped them before anything more happened. She held Willow's face in her hands and smiled. "It's gettin' late."

Willow, not following, frowned.

"You have school, remember?"

"School, yeah." Willow looked to the VCR, which changed to 11:42. "Don't I get a good night kiss?" she asked hopefully.

Jo chuckled. "When I tuck you in."

"All right." Willow got to her feet. Jo got up, too. She gathered the glasses from earlier in the evening and took them to the kitchen. She put them in the dishwasher and checked that the back door was locked before turning off the light. She did the same in the living room before going to Willow's room.

Willow was in bed, the covers pulled up. Jo leaned down and kissed her twice, then once more. "Good night."

"Night," Willow sighed.

* * *

><p>When Willow went to fix her lunch in the morning, she found a brown bag in the refrigerator with her name on it. She opened it and found a sandwich, fruit, and some cookies, along with a note from Jo. She read it and smiled before gathering the rest of what she needed for the day. She didn't see Buffy standing beside the house when she left.<p>

Once Willow as out of sight, Buffy let herself into the house. She found Jo quickly, and woke her roughly. "What's your damage?" Jo asked angrily.

"Cloven guy. Goes by the name Kakistos."

Jo, suddenly wide awake, sat up. "What do you know about Kakistos?"

"He's here."

Jo's expression changed from anger to fear.

"We're not happy to see old friends, are we? What'd he do to you?" Buffy asked.

Jo scrambled from bed and grabbed the pants she wore yesterday. "It's what I did to him, all right?" She pulled her pants on, then grabbed her boots. She sat on the bed to pull them on, then stood up again.

"And what was that? Faith, you came here for a reason. I can help."

Jo found her bag and put it on the dresser. She opened the top drawer and grabbed everything with both hands. She looked in the mirror at Buffy while stuffing things into her bag. "You can mind your own business." Jo slammed the drawer closed and pointed at herself. "I'm the one that can handle this."

"Yeah. You're a real bad-ass when it comes to packing." Jo shot her a dirty look before opening the second drawer. "What was that you said about my problem? Gotta deal and move on? Well, we have the 'moving on' part right here. What about dealing? Is that just something you're gonna dump on me?"

Jo zipped the duffel. "You don't know me. You don't know what I've been through. I'll take care of this, all right?" She opened the closet and pulled out her jacket before heading for the door.

"Like you took care of your Watcher?"

Jo stopped in her tracks. She took a deep breath and looked down, choking on memory and unshed tears.

"He killed her, didn't he?" Buffy asked.

"They don't have a word for what he did to her," Jo answered angrily.

"Faith, you run, he runs after you."

"That's where the head start comes in handy."

"You're not taking off," Buffy said firmly. She crossed the room in three steps and grabbed Jo's arm. "I don't care what you think about me, or Xander, or Giles, but you are NOT leaving without saying anything to Willow."

Jo's defiance dissipated instantly. "Crap."

"You're going to accept our help," Buffy said firmly. "First stop, Giles."

Willow was in the library when Buffy and Jo arrived. She looked at them uncertainly, but neither acknowledged her. Buffy pushed Jo into Giles' office and closed the door.

"Tell him," Buffy ordered.

"He knows."

"I do," Giles said. "But I'd like to hear it from you."

Jo dropped her bag and threw herself onto his sofa. She slumped over her knees. "Kakistos killed Catherine." She looked up. "I couldn't stop him. I tried," she said desperately. "I was lucky to get away."

Willow knocked twice and opened the door. "Faith?"

"Not now, Willow," Buffy said impatiently.

"What's going on?" Willow asked.

Jo looked at Willow. "I'll tell you later," she said, sounding far calmer than she felt.

"All right," Willow said uncertainly, and closed the door. She returned to her seat at the table and tried to figure out what was going on. She ignored the bell signaling the beginning of the day's first class, and settled in to wait until the Slayers left Giles' office.

Both Buffy and Jo looked upset when they finally left the small room. Buffy left the library without looking at Willow, but Jo came over and sat beside her.

"Are you all right?" Willow asked, although the answer was obvious.

"Yeah," Jo said in a subdued tone. "There's some stuff I gotta tell you."

"Ok," Willow said cautiously.

"My watcher isn't at a retreat," Jo said woodenly. She looked at the tabletop. "A vampire killed her, and I ran away so he wouldn't kill me, and now he's here."

Willow put her hand on Jo's shoulder. "We'll get him," she said gently.

Jo heard the conviction in her voice and turned to examine the girl. Like everything else in Sunnydale, she was one thing on the surface and another beneath. Jo felt the power the girl had, power Willow wasn't even aware of. "No. No one else is going to die." Jo shrugged off her hand. "No we in it."

"What do you mean?"

"Go to class, Red."

Willow's temper flared. "No. We're going to talk."

Jo looked at her for the first time. "This doesn't involve you."

"Of course it involves me," Willow answered. "That's how it works."

"Yeah, well, this ain't your pretty little California life. This is a huge, old, nasty demon, and he's after me. Don't get in the way."

Willow stood up, and for the first time in her life, let her temper loose. "Fuck you, Faith," she hissed, and stormed out of the library, leaving her things on the table.

Jo dropped her head onto her arms. Giles, who overheard their entire conversation, looked from the table to the door with a frown.

* * *

><p>When her last class let out, Buffy returned to the library. Giles was at the table with a large book, and Willow's things were where she had left them. Jo was nowhere in sight. "Where's Faith?" Buffy asked.<p>

Giles looked up, leaving a finger to mark his place on the page. "In my office."

"Is Will with her?"

"No."

"But her stuff's here."

Giles sighed. "They had a disagreement this morning and Willow left suddenly."

Buffy dropped her books on the table and spun around. She went into Giles' office and closed the door. "Where is she?"

"Where's who?" Jo asked listlessly.

"Willow."

Jo shrugged. "Dunno. Haven't seen her."

Buffy struggled with her temper. "What did you say to her?"

Hearing her tone, Jo stood up. "It's none of your business."

Buffy stepped into Jo's personal space. "Everything about Willow is my business," she said in a low voice.

Jo glared back, but didn't say anything.

"If anything happened to her, you're in a world of hurt," Buffy threatened. She didn't wait for an answer, and again turned on her heel. She closed the door firmly, just short of a slam. At that moment, Willow entered the library. "Willow!" Buffy greeted her. "Are you all right?"

"Peachy," Willow answered sarcastically. She walked to the table and began to gather her things.

Buffy followed closely. "I didn't see you in biology."

"Didn't go."

"You sure you're all right?"

"Yeah." Willow zipped her backpack and put it on. "I'll see you later."

Buffy followed her from the library. "Will, whatever's wrong, we can fix it."

"You can't fix this."

"What did Faith do?"

"Buffy, this really isn't your concern."

"Willow, you're my best friend."

Willow stopped and faced Buffy. "I really just wanna be alone right now."

After a few seconds, Buffy said, "All right. I'll give you a call later."

Willow left without saying anything.

Giles sent Xander to buy sandwiches. He didn't want Faith out of his sight, and neither did Buffy, who was angry with her about both Kakistos and Willow. They ate silently, and afterward, waited for dusk.

"Be careful," Giles stressed before sending them out.

They patrolled without talking. They didn't find anything until they reached the edge of the warehouse district, where they were attacked first by a band of vampires and then by Kakistos. They ran, Buffy pulling Jo along, and sought refuge in a dilapidated building.

"We're okay," Buffy said. "What happened?"

Jo didn't answer. She breathed too fast as she looked around for a place to hide.

"Faith, what happened?" Buffy asked urgently.

Jo tried to slow her breathing. "I, I was _there_ when he killed my Watcher, and I saw what he did to her. What he was gonna do to me. I tried to stop him, but I. I couldn't. And I ran."

"Faith, first rule of slaying: don't die. You did the right thing. Okay? You didn't die. Now you do the math. One of him, two of us."

Jo looked past Buffy and shook her head. "No."

"Yes."

Jo's panic escalated. "No."

Buffy turned around to see what she was looking at. On the floor was a row of bodies.

"This is his place."

"He drove us here."

One of the vampires appeared at an entrance and growled at them. They ran through the warehouse, the vampire behind them. Two others came in the other side and tried to head them off. Buffy engaged them while Jo backed away, looking for a way out.

Kakistos walked into the building and immediately fixed his one-eyed gaze on Jo. Buffy picked up a crowbar and swung it baseball style at yet another vampire advancing toward. She hit the female vampire in the neck and knocked her down and out. She saw Kakistos advancing on Jo.

"Faith!" Buffy yelled, and got her attention. "Don't die!" Buffy threw the crowbar to her.

Jo caught the crowbar in mid-air, but before she could swing it at Kakistos, he punched her several times before hitting her into the wall, knocking her through beams leaning there. Jo was momentarily stunned. Kakistos calmly stepped up to Jo as she scrambled up against the wall, cowering. He reached down and grabbed her by the shirt, picking her up off of the floor.

"No!" Jo screamed, but Kakistos raised her to his level and punched her in the face.

Buffy took down another vampire and staked him. Then, she looked at Faith, who was being whaled on by Kakistos. Kakistos finally hit Jo hard enough to knock her from his own grip onto the floor. He roared loudly. Buffy jumped up and ran over to attack him. She kicked him in the back of the knee. He blocked her first punch.

When Buffy tried to stake Kakistos, the stake went in only a few inches, and had no effect on him. He grabbed Buffy by the hair, lifted her, and threw her into the wall. Jo recovered from her daze and saw him looming before her, although his attention was on Buffy.

"I guess you need a bigger stake, Slayer!" he said, and laughed maniacally.

Jo spotted the sharp end of one of the fallen beams. She picked it up, hoisted onto her shoulder, and before Kakistos could turn his attention back to her, she thrust the beam through his chest and out his back. He looked down at it and back up at Jo before exploding into ashes.

Buffy stared in amazement. Jo heaved a few heavy breaths. Buffy pulled the hair back from her face and stepped over to Jo, who looked around to make sure nothing else was about to attack. They both looked down at the pile of ash left by Kakistos.

"You hungry?" Buffy asked.

"Starved," Jo answered, and they left the building.

"You're staying with me tonight."

"Thanks," Jo answered. "Thanks a bunch."

When they got back to the Summers residence, Buffy turned Jo over to her mother and went to her room. She called Willow, who was slow to answer. "Hi, Will."

"Hi, Buff," Willow answered listlessly.

"We got him."

"Good."

"Nobody got hurt."

"Good."

"How are you?"

"I don't know."

"Anything you want to talk about?"

"No."

"Things will get better," Buffy promised.


	8. Chapter 4B

Giles got up from his desk and came out to the table in the main room. "The council has approved our request. Faith is to stay here indefinitely." He walked around the table. "I'm to look after you both until a new Watcher is assigned." He picked up some papers.

From her seat on the table, Buffy said, "Good. She really came through in the end." She slid off of the table. "She had a lot to deal with, but she did it. She got it behind her."

"I'm glad to hear it," Giles answered. He looked at the clock over the entrance. "Don't you have class?"

"I'm waiting for Willow."

"Go to class, Buffy. I'll tell Willow you're looking for her."

Buffy didn't find Willow until she went by her house after school. She didn't bother to knock, just entered the house and went to Willow's bedroom.

Willow lay on her bed, still in pajamas, staring at the ceiling, and Buffy sighed. She went into the room and sat on the bed, one leg curled under her, the other on the floor, and picked up Willow's hand. "I'm sorry."

"She just acted like I was nobody, like I don't know anything about vampires or slaying."

"She was really scared," Buffy answered, finding it hard to believe she was taking up for Faith. Another look at Willow reaffirmed that, although against her better judgment, it was the right thing to help her friend. "She wants to apologize."

Willow rolled her eyes.

"C'mon, Will, she's gonna be staying here for a while."

Willow stared at the balcony doors while she thought. Her final decision was formed as much by Buffy's request as the bond she began to form with Faith. "Fine," Willow huffed after a long time.

"Get cleaned up and meet us at the Bronze."

Willow nodded. Buffy leaned down and kissed her cheek. "We'll figure it all out," she promised.

* * *

><p>Jo rolled out of bed and went to shower. She hadn't slept well. Although Kakistos was no longer a problem, she knew Willow was angry, and rightly so. Jo stood under the hot water and tried to figure out how to fix things with the redhead. She washed and shampooed automatically, and before turning the water off, decided that if she couldn't get Willow to forgive her, she would leave Sunnydale. It wasn't like she'd really belonged anywhere since her mother sent her off to boarding school.<p>

She dressed and packed her bag and carried it down to the kitchen. There was coffee, and a note on the table from Buffy's mother, along with $20, which Jo put into her pocket. Jo drank her coffee and carefully washed both her mug and the empty pot before leaving the house.

She spent the day walking around, trying to figure out what to do. Jo stood in the park after school and watched for Willow. She didn't see her, although she saw Buffy and Xander.

Jo headed to the diner to get something to eat and kill time until patrol. She was early, and when Buffy arrived at the cemetery, Jo was sitting on the wall.

"Hey," Buffy greeted her.

"Hey."

"You missed dinner."

"I got something." Jo pushed off and landed in front of Buffy.

"The Council's sending a Watcher for you. Giles is in charge until they get here."

"Great," Jo sighed. She picked up her bag.

"What's in the bag?"

"My stuff."

"You goin' somewhere?"

"Maybe." Jo shifted her weight uneasily. "Some reason you're playin' 20 questions?"

Buffy ignored her. "What did you do to Willow?"

"Nothin'," Jo answered.

"Well, you better think of something to fix it, because she's waiting for you at the Bronze."

"What?"

"Willow's my best friend, Faith. You made her unhappy. I don't know what you said, but at the very least, you're gonna apologize."

"You don't like me," Jo said, her confusion obvious.

"I like Willow. I've got patrol tonight. Haul your butt over to the Bronze and apologize to my best friend." When Jo didn't move, Buffy added, "Now."

Jo took a couple steps and turned around. While walking backward, she said, "I owe you one."

Buffy, walking in the other direction, didn't acknowledge her.

* * *

><p>It took Jo a few minutes to find Willow, who was sitting at one of the tables under the balcony. Jo watched her for several seconds before approaching. "Hey."<p>

Willow looked at her.

"I'm sorry."

Willow waited for more, and when she didn't get it, asked, "What were you thinking?"

"I just want you to be safe."

"That's not a reason."

"It's the only one I got." Jo put her bag on the empty chair, but continued to stand near Willow. "What he did to her." She stared at the tabletop, lost for a moment in that memory. "All I could think was I don't want that to happen to you."

"Why didn't you just tell me that instead of being all mean?"

Jo didn't move or answer. She kept her eyes down, and when Willow touched her shoulder, Jo jumped. "I gotta go," she said.

"Go where?"

"Patrol."

"With your bag," Willow said skeptically.

"I gotta go," Jo repeated.

"I'll go with you."

"No. Please. You shouldn't be out there."

"I can help, Faith."

"I know you can. You shouldn't have to. I'll see you at the library tomorrow."

"Promise?" Willow asked.

"Tomorrow," Jo repeated, and grabbed her bag. She walked quickly out of the club. Her mind was still reeling, and she hadn't decided yet what to do. The motel was nearby, and Jo headed toward it. Along the way, she staked three vampires, two of whom had cash.

She paid for two nights, and went to the room. Inside, she dropped the bag and took off her jacket. Jo threw the comforter to the floor, then sat on the bed to remove her boots before laying on her back. She thought she'd be up for a while, but exhaustion sent her first to sleep, and then to nightmares.

Willow trailed her from the Bronze and watched her disappear behind the battered red door. She sighed and checked the time. It was about time for Buffy's mid-patrol break, so she headed to the Espresso Pump.

When Willow arrived, she scanned the crowd, but didn't see her friend. When she ordered, she asked if Buffy had been in, and when the clerk told her no, Willow ordered two mochas and took them to a table near the door.

Buffy came in a few minutes later, and Willow hailed her.

"What are you doing here?" Buffy asked.

"Waiting for you." Willow pointed at the second drink.

Buffy sat and sipped. "I thought you'd be at the Bronze with Faith."

"She said she had patrol, but she went back to the motel."

"Gross."

"Yeah. I thought she was staying with you."

"She's supposed to. You want me to talk to her?"

"Maybe later. She looked pretty wrecked."

"Wrecked how?"

"Tired. Down. I don't know exactly."

"Are you all right?"

"I'm fine."

"Did she apologize?"

"Yes." Willow looked at the table, remembering the little bit that Jo said. "What was it like? The vampire that killed her Watcher?"

"It took a huge stake to kill him. Mr. Pointy hardly went through his clothes."

"Oh."

"What's with the questions and long face? That's Giles' department."

"Just thinking."

"You can think and walk," Buffy said. She stood up, mocha in hand. "It's a slow night. I'll walk you home."

* * *

><p>It took another week for Jo to find out why Buffy annoyed her so much. It wasn't her manner, or her fighting style, or anything physical. It was her boyfriend. Jo saw Buffy kissing a vampire, and turned her back on the girl. She went directly to Giles, who sighed.<p>

"You know?" Jo asked.

"Yes."

"And you let her?"

"Angel is different."

"Angel is a vampire."

"He has a soul."

"So does every person he killed."

"Faith, not everything is black and white."

"You people are crazy."

"Unorthodox, perhaps," Giles agreed. "Angel has assisted us many times. He is part of Buffy's support system."

"She's supposed to slay vampires, not kiss them."

"Perhaps you should discuss this with the others."

"Why, so they can tell me what a great guy the blood sucking fiend is?"

"They may be able to explain more clearly than I can."

"I doubt it."

"Can we agree to disagree for now?"

"He's a vampire," Jo said.

Giles removed his glasses and massaged the bridge of his nose.

Jo looked at him, then went back out with the intention of finishing patrol. Instead, she went to Willow's house. "Hey," she said nervously when Willow opened the door.

"Hi, Faith. Wanna come in?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Everything all right?"

"No." Jo stood in the foyer and shifted from one foot to the other.

"Come sit down. You want anything?"

"No, thanks." Jo removed her jacket and sat in one of the chairs. She laid the jacket across her lap.

"What's going on?"

"Why is Buffy dating a vampire?"

"Oh, you found out about Angel."

"Yeah."

"It's kinda complicated."

"What's complicated? He's a vampire, she's a Slayer."

"Angel's not your regular vampire."

"Yeah, he's got a soul. So what?"

"Demons don't have souls."

"So?"

"A long time ago, Angel was Angelus. He was a monster, a walking nightmare. One night, he killed a gypsy girl. Her family cursed him with a soul. He disappeared for a long time, and since he came back, he's been doing anything he can to atone for what he did."

"He's still a vampire."

"He is," Willow agreed. "But he doesn't kill humans. He doesn't even drink human blood any more. He's our friend. He's helped us ever since Buffy came here. He helped her stop the Master." Willow paused to give Jo a chance to say something, and when she didn't, continued. "We all make mistakes, Faith. Angel's trying to make up for his."

"Still don't like him," Jo muttered.

"You don't like Buffy, either," Willow observed, "but you work with her."

"Not like I have a choice. She's the original. I'm the second string. It's her Hellmouth."

"You're not the second anything. You're here because Buffy died for a little while. Xander brought her back. There was another Slayer before you, Kendra. A vampire killed her in front of Buffy. Buffy couldn't do anything to stop it. She almost went to jail for murder. We've been waiting for you to show up."

"I didn't want to come here."

"Who does? But you're here now. There's a reason."

"Kakistos." Jo dropped her head.

"Whatever happened in Cleveland, Faith, it wasn't your fault."

"Don't tell me what I did was right."

"I didn't say that," Willow answered patiently. "I said it wasn't your fault."

"I gotta go." Jo stood up and jerked her jacket on.

"I'm usually up late if you want to talk later," Willow offered.

Jo left without answering. After two unsatisfactory hours of patrol, she returned to Willow's house. The light from her bedroom showed that the other girl was still up, so Jo knocked on the door again.

Half a minute later, the porch light came on. Willow checked through the peephole and opened the door again.

"Is it, uh, too late?"

"No," Willow answered, and waited for Jo to enter. "You want anything?" she asked while closing and locking the door.

"Water?"

"Sure. C'mon."

Jo followed Willow to the kitchen. She took the glass Willow gave her and stood at the sink while she emptied it twice. She filled it a third time and turned around. "Don't take this personally, but I hate this place."

"I'd worry about your sanity if you felt otherwise. You wanna sit here or?"

"Wherever."

Willow nodded and headed out the door. Jo followed her up to her bedroom. She sat in Willow's desk chair while the redhead sat cross-legged on her bed. "What's on your mind?"

"I dunno," Jo answered, shaking her head. "I probably should just go."

"Why'd you come back?"

"I dunno," Jo repeated, frowning.

"Needing other people doesn't make you weak."

"I don't. They were." Jo struggled to make a complete sentence without giving away too much.

"Who'd you leave behind?"

"Everybody. My whole family, all of my friends. All I had in Cleveland was my Watcher, and I couldn't even keep her alive," Jo answered bitterly.

"That wasn't your fault."

"Stop saying that!"

"No," Willow answered firmly. "I can't imagine how you feel, apart from alone, and I understand that pretty well. If you can tell me what you could have done to save her, I'll let you wallow in guilt until the cows come home, whatever that means." Willow waited, and watched Jo think. "Well?" she prompted after three minutes.

"I couldn't do anything."

"Then it's not your fault."

Jo rocked a little. Catherine's death may not have been her fault, but it still _felt_ like it was. At least she was far from the people she loved, and they were safe from that. She stood up.

Willow slid off the bed and stood between Jo and the door. "Running away won't fix anything," she said softly, and moved closer.

Jo wasn't expecting the hug at all, and was surprised at how tightly Willow held her. She resisted for a few seconds before hugging her back, as grateful for the physical comfort as the emotional consolation.

"It'll be all right," Willow murmured.

The last time Jo was hugged was when she arrived in Boston to celebrate Thanksgiving with her aunt, uncle, and cousins. Earlier that day, Blair held her for a long time, and kissed her until she saw stars. It seemed like forever ago.

From the sidewalk, Buffy saw two silhouettes merge into one, and bit back her rising anger. She ordered Faith to make up with Willow, and it now seemed like a stupid idea. She didn't like Faith, who was usurping her Watcher, her best friend, and her other best friend. She reminded herself that she wanted Willow to be happy.

Jo wasn't sure why she kissed Willow, or why Willow kissed her back. Nothing was settled between them. Jo didn't know whether she could repair the damage she'd done, or if she wanted to make that commitment. When the kiss ended, she tried to move away, but Willow resisted. "I gotta go," Jo said hoarsely.

"You can stay here."

Jo shook her head.

"Faith, it's all right." Willow cupped Jo's cheek with her hand. "You're safe here. Nothing bad will happen, I promise."

Jo frowned, trying to think of an answer that would let her escape. It was suddenly hard to breathe and harder to think. She hadn't realized until now how much she took for granted the casual physical affection she shared with Blair. Thinking her name made Jo frown harder. "I gotta go," she repeated.

"I'll be here if you need to talk," Willow said, and dropped her arms.

Jo started to leave, but turned around in the hallway. Willow looked forlorn, and Jo thought of Blair again, how she would give almost anything to make sure the blonde never looked like that. She wasn't being fair to Willow, who'd done nothing but try to help. Jo walked back into the room, and turned off the light switch as she stepped through the door.

On the sidewalk, Buffy's eyes narrowed angrily. She stared at the balcony and wished for x-ray vision before stalking off, trying not to think about all the things that could be happening.

Jo shrugged off her jacket and hung it on the desk chair, then sat on it to remove her boots while Willow turned down the covers and set the alarm. Jo stood up and took off her jeans, folded them neatly, and put them on the chair. Willow got in bed on the side closest to the door, and Jo walked around to the other side and got in.

"Good night, Faith."

"Night, Willow."

In the morning, Jo slept through the alarm, and Willow was long gone when she woke. There was a note on her jeans asking her to come back for dinner, and Jo sighed. She dressed quickly, and beneath Willow's request, wrote a brief answer declining the invitation. As much as she enjoyed Willow's company, she worried that fixing things between them would make everything else more complicated. Willow had a life here, and Jo couldn't see how she might fit into it, and wasn't sure that she wanted to try.

* * *

><p>Jo's reservations about Buffy kept her on the fringes of her life, and she preferred it that way. Her only regular contact with her was the twice-weekly patrol that Giles insisted they do together. After the third time a sparring session ended with both of them injured, Giles trained them separately.<p>

Jo talked with Willow sometimes, but mostly kept to herself. There were no more kisses; Jo tried apologize, and Willow waved it off, and they didn't talk about it again, or about whatever it was that kept pulling Jo back to her. There were too many things she didn't want to explain, and nearly as many that she didn't completely understand. Apart from the occasional conversation with Willow or gaming marathon with Xander, she didn't socialize with them. She declined Buffy's invitation to Thanksgiving dinner – Jo knew Buffy didn't want her there, and Willow's pleading wasn't enough to change her mind - and spent the day sitting on the beach, thinking about all that had happened to her in 12 months.

The beach was empty, so she didn't have to worry about anyone seeing her break down. Jo stayed hunched around her knees for hours, grieving all she lost. What hurt most was not seeing her mother, or talking to her. They had been all they had for as long as Jo could remember. Her father appeared and disappeared, but her mother was always there. As much as she missed her, Jo was angry, too. If she'd been allowed to spend Thanksgiving with Blair, if her mother hadn't insisted she go to Boston, things would be different.

Her extended family was gone, too. Jo couldn't begin to imagine how distraught they must have been when she didn't return, making the telephone calls that brought more grief and pain and resolved nothing.

She remembered the last thing Blair said to her, and knew Blair was in New York with her mother, watching huge balloons float through the canyon between buildings, and that tomorrow, her friend would be shopping. Jo was glad that Blair could have a normal life, even as she missed her. Lita was a long-ago memory, but Jo could still recall her last seconds with Blair, the kisses that always promised something more, the warmth of Blair's arms around her, and her quiet "I'll miss you."

Jo could find nothing to be thankful for. She hated being a Slayer. She hated Sunnydale more than she hated Cleveland. No matter how many people she saved, there were more she couldn't. She couldn't let herself care too much about the people here, even those who tried to be her friends. She couldn't lower that barrier, the fear that if she let anyone close, they would be taken from her, too.

Jo thought about going to school with the others, but couldn't stomach the thought of it. She spent many of her days in the public library, reading her way through the nonfiction shelves, figuring that she was learning at least as much as she would in school. If she managed to get back to Eastland, she and Blair would graduate in the spring.

She watched the sunset, waiting until the last arc of the sun disappeared, before getting up and slipping on her jacket. Evil didn't take a holiday, and vampires would be out and about. She welcomed the opportunity to take them on, to make them pay for everything that was taken from her.

* * *

><p>Jo became more morose as the winter holidays approached. She felt the urge to talk to someone neutral, and went to confession. She was in the confessional for hours, and accepted the light penance the priest gave, wondering why it wasn't greater.<p>

She sat through mass, taking comfort in the rituals, and received communion when it was offered. After the service, Jo stayed in her pew. Churches were, as she grew up, places she was resigned to spending time in. Today, she looked around recognizing the symbols and recalling the stories behind them, the familiar smells of wood polish and incense, the calm of sanctuary that let her breathe easily for a few minutes.

She left when her butt was numb, and went to the library to resume her reading. Jo couldn't concentrate, though, and found her thoughts focused on the past. She ached to have someone talk with her without some ulterior motive. Her distrust of Buffy never left – how could she trust someone who was so familiar with an enemy? She'd managed to stake Lita, who she'd known before she was turned, but Buffy insisted she loved Angel. Xander and Willow were Buffy's friends, and unshakably loyal to her. Giles was Buffy's Watcher, and to Jo he was distant and unreadable. Even he never questioned why she always had money or how she got it.

In the middle of December, Jo was selling jewelry in a pawnshop when she noticed a necklace. The tiger's eye at the end of the intricate chain immediately reminded her of Blair's eyes, and her chest tightened. She negotiated a price she could afford, and walked out with it in a velvet box in an inside jacket of her pocket.

The next day, she found a card she liked, and sat in the library trying to think of something to say. After countless false starts, she wrote, _Dear Blair, I hope you are well and happy. I'm safe, and the story is longer, and I still can't tell it. I think about you a lot, and I'm sorry I can't be there. I saw this and remembered your eyes. Merry Christmas. Love, Jo_

She went to the post office and mailed the necklace and card that afternoon.

* * *

><p>Blair waited and hoped that Jo was still all right. She knew Jo would contact her again. In the meantime, she concentrated on school. Her grades were consistently good. She continued with her extracurricular activities and spent her extra time swimming endless laps, waiting for Jo to rejoin her. Jo's teammates insisted Blair eat her meals with them, and she gave in, even though seeing them in their uniforms unsettled her. The only saving grace was that Jo's number wasn't in use.<p>

The Thanksgiving following Jo's disappearance was hard for Blair. She thought of the things she wanted to say to her friend, the things she planned to say when they were back at school together, that she would say whenever she saw her again, even if Jo didn't want to hear them. Blair's mother noted her melancholy, but could do nothing to ease it. Her father was in India. After the holiday, Blair went back to school, where the empty room taunted her that she would never see Jo again.

The envelope that arrived the week before Christmas break set her heart racing again. She called the security firm, giving them the town and zip code on the envelope, before hurrying up to her room. Again, she sat on the bed and opened the envelope. She set the jewelry box aside in favor of the card. Blair savored the brief message. She read it a dozen times before opening the box. She sighed at the gift, admiring the pendant and the thought behind it.


	9. Chapter 5A

What you don't know they say won't hurt you  
>That you can't miss what you never had<br>They say forgetting is a virtue  
>Can't do a damn thing about the past<br>But I keep going over in my mind  
>How much we had in so little time<br>_Blue Wind_

Jo sat in her favorite spot in the library, reading. Something caused her to look up. At the checkout desk, a man who looked like a cop talked with the librarian. When the librarian pointed in her direction, Jo bolted.

Between her speed and knowledge of Sunnydale, Jo lost him quickly. She slowly made her way to her motel room, checking regularly that she wasn't followed, packed her things, and sat on the bed to wait for night to come.

When it was dark, Jo left. She debated taking the bus, and decided to hitchhike. Jo waited until she passed the city limits sign to put out her thumb, and stayed awake through the night as she moved toward Los Angeles.

Jo spent two weeks there before she found the bus station and began another fitful cross-country trip. She took her time because she had nowhere to be. It was easy to spend a week or two in every town large enough to support a vampire population, replenishing her funds and destroying them. The arrogance of the demons told her that they believed the Slayer to be a legend, a bogeyman, and she was happy to prove otherwise. She obliterated nest after nest and moved on, sometimes walking or hitchhiking, sometimes taking the bus.

She didn't talk with anyone beyond what was necessary to get what she needed, and the desperation that followed her from Cleveland surfaced again in grotesque nightmares. Sometimes the Sunnydale crew was in them, and in the worst, they lay dead in a smoking wasteland.

During spring in Austin, Texas, Jo was looking for clothes in a second-hand store. She stumbled across a small pile of signed poetry books. She opened one and read the first poem, and bought the rest without reading them. She also found some jeans to replace the pair that was destroyed the night before by a slime spitting demon.

_Happy Birthday, Blair! _Jo wrote inside a blank card that she picked because she thought Blair would like the picture. _I still miss you, and I still can't tell you anything except that I'm ok and wish I could be there to buy your first legal drink. Love, Jo_

She mailed the package, and went to get something to eat. She stayed in Austin another week, cleaning out two nests near the University of Texas campus before moving on.

A month later, Jo sent Blair a graduation card from St. Louis, Missouri, but there was no gift because she had no idea what to send. _Congratulations,_ Jo wrote. _I'm proud of you and I wish I could be there to see you in your cap and gown. Nothing's changed, and I hope that some day I can tell you everything. Love, Jo._ She dropped it in a mailbox on her way out of town.

Jo spent the summer traveling up the Atlantic coast, stopping briefly in each tourist trap. They were all the same to her, smelling of suntan lotion and fried food during the day, pheromones and alcohol at night.

By the middle of September, Jo was in Atlantic City, New Jersey. She'd been there for a week, playing blackjack during the afternoons and winning enough that the hotel comped her room and meals. At night, she hunted. The vampire high rollers made her laugh. She relieved them of their cash and ostentatious jewelry before dusting them.

When she was ambushed in an alley at the start of her evening outing, Jo knew it was time to move on. She won the fight, but there was no patrol that night, just a light, restless sleep full of screams and blood. The next morning, she left on the first northbound bus.

In Trenton, Jo found the library, and pulled a book at random from the shelf. Blair was still on her mind. Jo was lonely and tired of just surviving. Moving from place to place was harder than she thought it would be, and living with her thoughts made it more difficult. She'd broken down and called her mother twice, but was unable to say anything when she heard her voice.

Jo decided to find Blair, just to check whether she was all right. She didn't think it would be too difficult, and she was right. On her second day in the library, Jo found the _New York Times_ society page note that Blair was attending Wellesley, as her mother and grandmother had. Jo headed directly to the bus station and bought a ticket for Boston.

Finding Blair was a little harder, but Jo went at it systematically. She started in the college library, and when that was unsuccessful, found out where mandatory freshman classes were held and camped in front of those lecture halls until she spotted Blair. It took two days, and when Jo saw her, her resolution to check on Blair without the other woman knowing vaporized. Jo trailed her, and when it looked like Blair was headed off campus, Jo loped up behind her and tapped her on the shoulder.

Blair turned her head, then turned completely around. "Jo?"

"It's me."

Blair threw herself onto Jo, who dropped her bag and wrapped her arms around Blair.

"I missed you," Jo said softly.

"I missed you, too. I've been so worried."

"Sorry."

They let go of each other, but Blair grabbed one of Jo's hands. "You're coming with me," she said definitively.

Jo picked up her bag and let Blair take her away.

They didn't talk on the brief walk. Once inside Blair's apartment, Jo dropped her bag beside Blair's and again found herself in a fierce hug, this one brief, and then pulled into the living room. "You lost weight," Blair said as she put them on the sofa.

"You look great," Jo answered.

"I can't believe you're here. You're not leaving again, are you?"

"Not right away."

"You're staying here."

"That's not safe."

"Of course it's safe. Daddy checked. This is the safest place for miles."

"If I'm here, it's not safe for you."

"Are those things still after you?"

Jo nodded. "Vampires, Blair. They're freakin' vampires. And I'm after them more than they're after me, but if they know about you." Jo stopped, not wanting to think about all the things that could happen to Blair.

"I don't care, Jo. You're not just going to disappear again."

"I'm so sorry about that."

"What happened?"

Jo sighed. "I found out the truth."

"About?"

"A lotta things. All those things that they scare you with, they're real. Vampires and werewolves and all those other demons. And there has to be balance, so there's a Slayer."

"You."

"Yeah. Actually, through some freak thing, there's two right now, but I'm one of them."

"So you decided to take off and be a monster hunter."

"I got drafted. It wasn't my choice."

"Why didn't you call or something?"

"I couldn't. I shouldn't have sent you those cards."

"Why did you?"

Jo looked at Blair for a second, then past her, before deciding to tell only part of the truth. "I missed you. I knew you'd worry."

"I've been looking for you. Every time we were close, you just disappeared again."

Jo thought for a second. "When I was in California, this guy came into the library. I thought he was a cop."

"He said he saw you, but he couldn't find you after that. That was the closest we ever got."

"I left Sunnydale that night."

"Why'd you go there anyway?"

"I, somebody told me to go there for help."

"What aren't you telling me?" Blair asked impatiently.

"I don't even know where to begin."

"At the beginning, Jo. Tell me everything after the train station."

Jo sighed. Blair squeezed her hand, the hand she hadn't let go, and Jo looked at their hands. She had as much physical contact in the last part of an hour than she had in nearly two years. Their joined hands meant more to her than she could say. She hadn't felt this comfortable and at ease since they separated at the train station more than a year before.

"Before I start, did you have a good Thanksgiving that year?"

"I did. We did what we do every year, and it was fun. I," Blair faltered for a moment, then went on. "I wished you were there."

"I had a good visit with everybody. My aunt is a great cook, and I got to sleep in on Friday. I decided to go to the mall, to look around, get some ideas for gifts, you know. It wasn't far, so I walked. And when I was done, I started walking home. I had to go by a cemetery, and I got attacked again. I was winnin' the fight, but I couldn't get a good grip on him to finish him off, and this British lady threw me a stake.

"I dusted him and she started talkin' and next thing I know, I'm in Cleveland and she's trainin' me. I never worked so hard in my life. Train all day, patrol most of the night."

"Why did you go with her?"

"She, uh, kidnapped me."

"And you couldn't get away?"

"I tried, once. I wanted to come home for Christmas, but it didn't work out." Jo stared at the floor for a moment, then reached into her jacket and pulled out the photo of Blair. She frowned at it before handing it to Blair.

"Where did you get this?"

"She gave it to me. After I tried to get away. I'm sorry. I didn't believe they'd hurt you."

"It was an accident."

"No, it wasn't." Jo reached over and took the photo back.

"They can't do anything to you now," Blair said confidently.

Although Jo didn't believe that, she nodded.

"What were you doing?"

"Killing things, mostly, or learning to kill them and practicing to kill them. I spent most of my time in the red light district and down by the docks. Cops don't really care what goes on down there. Easy pickings for vampires. What's one more dead junkie or hooker? Nobody cares about them."

"You did."

Jo ignored Blair's comment. "Things started getting really bad. Catherine – she was my Watcher – figured out what was going on, but she didn't tell me. She went on patrol with me one night, and we ran into this, this thing. He killed her." Jo stared at the floor, seeing it again, hearing Catherine's screams.

"I'm sorry."

Blair's voice brought Jo back to the present. She twitched, and looked at Blair for a moment, and nodded before continuing her story. "He tried to kill me, but I got away. I went to California for help. I met the other Slayer there, and when Kakistos followed me, we killed him. I was trying to decide what to do when your guy spotted me. It was a good excuse to leave. I woulda left eventually, but it was incentive. I just kinda worked my way back here."

"I'm really glad you did." Blair squeezed her hand and smiled.

Jo relaxed a little bit. "Me too," she smiled back.

"What are you going to do?"

"Well, first I'm gonna take you to lunch."

"And after that?"

Jo shrugged. "Find someplace to stay and get back to work."

"Stay here."

"I won't do that to you."

"If you're here, it's safe. And you won't win, Jo. I'm not letting you just disappear again."

"I won't leave town, I promise."

"Not good enough."

"Blair, these things follow me around. They will take anything I value. They will kill you to get to me, and I can't let that happen."

"Stop it. It isn't any different now than it was in Peekskill, except now you know how to beat them. How many of them have you killed?"

"I don't know."

"And I'm sure you've learned ways to protect yourself other than fighting. I trust you to keep me safe." Blair stood up and tugged Jo's arm. "You're taking me to lunch, remember?"

"Wherever you want to go."

"There's a place nearby. We can walk. Tell me about California."

They talked for the rest of the afternoon. Blair told Jo about Eastland, and the places her parents took her, and college. Jo talked about the places she'd been, deliberately leaving out most of her Slaying experiences. They went to the restaurant, then back to Blair's apartment.

Jo didn't need a watch to know when the sun was low in the sky, and told Blair, "I need to get ready."

"For?"

"Patrol." Jo stood up and gently separated their hands. Jo picked up her bag and went back to the only bedroom. Blair followed her, but Jo stopped her at the door. "I gotta change," she said apologetically, and closed the door. She left the bag out of the way, on the floor beside the dresser.

When she opened the door again, dressed in black leather pants, a long-sleeved black shirt, leather jacket and boots, Blair said, "Wow."

Jo didn't want to blush, but did anyway. "I'll be back in the morning."

"Wait. I need to give you a few things."

Jo followed Blair back to the living room. Blair went to her desk and opened the top drawer. She pulled out a note card and key ring. She wrote something on the card and gave it and the keys to Jo.

Jo looked at them, then back at Blair.

"My phone numbers," Blair explained. "And a set of keys." She leaned in and kissed Jo's cheek. "Be careful."

Jo nodded and left.

She decided to begin in Wellesley. Colleges always drew vampires, so she walked back to the campus. She began walking around and through the campus in a grid pattern, noting places to come back to later, and staking the vampires she ran across. None of them put up any real fight, so she was able to clean them out before dispatching them.

Around midnight, she found an all-night donut shop, and stopped to get coffee. She was surprised that one of the employees was a vampire, and when she finished her coffee, approached it. "Can I talk to you?"

The girl sighed. "I get my break in 10 minutes."

"I'll be right here," Jo said, and went back to the table by the window.

The vampire sat across from her. "What do you want, Slayer?"

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"Working."

"Funny."

"I don't hunt. I don't feed. I protect my friends."

"Oh, let me guess, you have a soul."

"No."

"So what's your story?"

"My story is none of your business. I do nothing that concerns you."

"You know who I am."

"They share a house." She described how to get there. "That pack, they're the worst."

"Or your rivals."

She laughed. "All my kind consider me an enemy."

"So do I."

"I am not your enemy. I'm not going to hide from you."

"So you'll be here."

"I'll be here."

"I'll be back."

"Good."

They looked at each other, and at the same time said, "I have to get back to work."

The vampire smiled at that. Jo did not. But she went by the house the vampire described, and decided to check it again after sunrise.

The rest of the night was quiet. She staked a few more vampires before dawn. Once the sun was fully up, Jo returned to the house. All of the windows were covered by heavy drapes, and the exterior was in poor condition.

She went around to the back of the house and forced the back door open. The kitchen was vacant, with two doors. One led to an empty pantry, the other to the basement. The dining room was full of computers and stereo components. In the living room, she found two vampires, one on each couch, both in a stupor, and staked them. There were two more rooms on the first floor. In the bedroom, she found two vampires having sex. She staked the top one first, then the one on bottom, grimacing at the ick factor. The other room was empty.

Jo returned to the kitchen and went down into the basement. There were six vampires there, and two of them were more alert than the others. She scuffled with them briefly, but they were no more challenge than any of the others in the house, and they were soon piles on the floor. The others, less alert, took only seconds to destroy. Jo carefully checked the basement to make sure there were no others hiding there before going back to the kitchen, then upstairs.

Each of the upstairs bedrooms held a sleeping vampire, and she staked them and moved on. The attic was dusty and obviously unused since the house's original owners were there. To be safe, she carefully checked the entire house again. Then she went through and gathered up the cash that was lying around and decided to call it a night.

She was torn between seeing Blair and getting something to eat, and decided to call to see what Blair's day held.

"Hello."

"Hey."

"Where are you?"

Jo looked around. "Not really sure, but not far away. I was gonna get some breakfast."

"Come home," Blair demanded.

"You all right?"

"I'm fine. Just get back here. I'll feed you."

"Yes, ma'am," Jo answered, and hung up. She looked around to orient herself, then set off.

Blair was in front of her before she got the apartment door closed. "Are you all right?"

"I'm hungry and I need a shower, but other than that, I'm great."

"Thank god." Blair softened her tone. "Get cleaned up and I'll make breakfast." She walked away before Jo could say anything.

Jo went to the bedroom and stripped. She heard Blair in the kitchen and didn't worry about having an audience for the few steps to the bathroom.

She took a quick shower and dressed in shorts and a t-shirt before going to the kitchen.

"How do you like your eggs?"

"Scrambled. Thanks a lot. I was just gonna pick something up."

"You can do that tomorrow."

"How's your schedule today?"

"I have classes until four."

"Can I take you to dinner?"

Blair looked over her shoulder at Jo. "You can take me anywhere you want."

Jo bit her lip to keep from showing on her face exactly what that statement brought to mind. "Anything I can do to help?"

"No. Just sit down. It'll be ready in a minute."

Jo sat down. Two glasses of tomato juice were on the table, and she drank from the nearest one. A few minutes later, Blair put plates on the table and sat down.

"Looks good," Jo told her, and began to eat.

Blair kept an eye on Jo while she ate, and was glad she remembered how much Jo could eat. They finished about the same time, although Jo ate much more than Blair.

"How was your night?"

"Busy. Yours?"

"I was worried," Blair admitted.

"You don't have to worry. I know what I'm doing."

"I love you, Jo. I'm going to worry."

Jo looked at Blair, surprised by her statement, and looked at the microwave. "I'll take care of the dishes. You need to get ready to go."

Blair looked at her watch and got up. She stopped to hug Jo on her way out of the kitchen. "See you later."

"I'll be here."

When Blair returned, Jo was napping on the sofa, but woke up as soon as she heard the key in the door. She was dressed in dark clothes again, and her jacket lay on the back of the couch. She stretched, then smiled at Blair. "Hey."

"Hi." Blair went to her desk and put down her satchel.

"Where you wanna go for dinner?"

"I couldn't get a reservation so I arranged for delivery."

Jo frowned.

"It's not a big deal. We'll go another night." Blair sat beside her on the couch.

"All right."

"I still can't believe you're here."

"I think you mentioned that." Jo smiled.

"I just, it was so hard. I had a million things to tell you, and now that I can, I can't remember any of them."

"I know the feeling."

"Do you?" Blair shifted a little on the couch.

Jo looked at her, and could tell Blair was asking more than it seemed. The only truthful answer Jo had didn't involve words, so she leaned over and kissed Blair. She felt like everything around her stopped while the kiss went on, and a feeling of peace washed through her.

Rather than let Jo end the kiss, Blair moved onto her lap. She put one arm around Jo's shoulders, her other hand on Jo's cheek. Jo's hands moved automatically, one going to Blair's hip to steady her, the other on her thigh. When the kiss ended, they kept their foreheads together. "You're amazing," Jo said hoarsely, her head still swimming.

"God, I missed you."

"We should talk.

"Later." Blair kissed Jo again, and didn't stop until the phone rang. She leaned over and picked up the handset on the end table. "Yes. I'll be right down, thank you." She replaced the phone and told Jo, "Dinner's here. We need to go down and get it."

Jo closed her eyes, trying to compose herself, and instead saw a thousand lascivious ideas induced by Blair's choice of language. "Coming," she said, and silently chuckled.

Jo carried the bags and unpacked them while Blair set the table. She was more interested in Blair than in eating, but her appetite wasn't affected. Still, she waited until the meal was finished to repeat, "We should talk."

"About what?"

"I kissed you."

"I kissed you, too. Did I do something wrong?" Blair was puzzled.

"No," Jo said quickly.

Blair stood up and began clearing the table. "You were gone for almost two years. We have a lot of making up to do."

"Blair?"

Blair put their plates in the sink and turned around to find Jo inches away. She put her arms around Jo's neck. "I love you. I missed you like crazy." She kissed Jo again, thrilled when Jo pulled her as close as she could.

Jo backed away, suddenly overwhelmed both physically and emotionally.

"It's all right, Jo," Blair said gently, picking up one of her hands before Jo could get any farther away.

"I need to go."

"Not yet."

Jo tried to pull her hand back, but Blair held on. "I need to go," she repeated.

"You said we need to talk."

"Later."

"Promise?"

"Yes." Jo stepped in to kiss Blair's cheek.

Blair turned so she could kiss Jo again. "Be careful," she instructed, and released Jo's hand.

Jo nodded, grabbed her jacket, and ran for the door. She was a block from Blair's apartment before she stopped. "Idiot," she said to herself, and slowed to a walk, and suddenly stopped. "She loves me," Jo whispered, and started grinning.

She felt better than she had in a long time, and felt even better a few moments when she quietly admitted, "I love her, too."

Jo started walking, changing her focus to what was going on around her. She had a better idea where to begin looking tonight, and easily found vampires stalking students. Robbing and staking them was routine to her now, and she did it without any real thought.

Jo stopped in the donut shop a little after midnight. She took her coffee to a table, and the vampire joined her a few minutes later.

"Well?" the vampire asked while sitting down.

"Thirteen."

"You got all of them."

"What's your deal?" Jo asked.

"I'm a vegetarian," the vampire deadpanned.

Jo laughed. "What's your name?"

"Amy."

"Well, Amy, you have my attention. That's not usually a good thing."

"I'm well aware of that, Slayer."

"Then you know what I need to know."

Amy gave Jo another address.

"How many?"

"I'm not sure. No more than at the last place."

"Thanks. See you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow's my night off."

"Laundry?" Jo joked.

"Dinner with my mother."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. She keeps asking when I'm going to find a nice boy and settle down."

"I'm not touchin' that." Jo emptied her coffee cup and stood up. "See ya."

The rest of the night was quiet, and just after dawn, Jo went to check out the second house. It looked much like the first, the yard neglected and the windows covered. She checked the front door and found it open.

There were eight vampires in the living room, all of them still quite alert, and it was more of a fight than Jo had since Atlantic City. She managed to dust all of them, but she was certain some ribs were cracked. Still, she went through the house. There were no more vampires there, and she headed back to Blair's apartment. She stopped along the way and bought breakfast.

Blair was still in bed. Jo stood and watched her sleep. She picked up her sleep clothes and went to the bathroom without waking Blair. Blair was still asleep when Jo finished her shower, and Jo got in on the far side of the bed, her back to Blair.

The alarm woke both of them. Blair held Jo's hand in place on her breast while she turned it off, then turned so she could look at Jo, who had her leg over Blair's. She pushed Jo's hair out of her face. "This is nice."

"Um hmm," Jo agreed sleepily.

"You need to let me get up."

"Unh unh."

Blair giggled and kissed Jo's forehead. "I have an early class."

Jo grunted and loosened her hold on Blair. Blair got out of bed and picked up her robe.

When she came out of the shower, Jo wasn't in bed, but she smelled coffee. Blair dressed and went into the kitchen, where Jo waited. She'd all ready eaten and cleaned up, and when she heard Blair, put her breakfast in the microwave. Jo put the plate in front of her right after Blair sat down, then refilled her coffee and sat down again.

"Thank you."

Jo nodded and covered a yawn.

"I'll be home for lunch."

"Ok."

"Go on back to bed."

"I will."

"You can go now." Blair smiled at her. "It's ok."

Jo put her coffee cup in the sink and bussed Blair's cheek before shuffling toward the bedroom.

Jo woke up shortly before 11 a.m. She put on a pair of jeans that had seen better days and a shirt with frayed cuffs and collar. She emptied her jacket pockets of the cash she'd collected, arranging the bills by value before counting. She picked up nearly $1,000, and had yet to thoroughly search either house. She put $200 in her wallet and got the rest of her nest egg from her duffel bag. She put $500 back in the bag, and added that money to the pile on the bed. Once it was sorted, she counted again. Satisfied with the amount, she nodded, folded it in half, and put it in her right front pocket. Then went to the kitchen and made a fresh pot of coffee.

When Blair returned, she had her bare feet propped up on the coffee table. Classical music played softly, and Jo was reading the anthology from Blair's philosophy class.

"You're up," Blair said.

"Yup." Jo patted the sofa.

Blair put her satchel at her desk and joined Jo. "What's that?"

Jo showed her the cover.

"Please tell me it makes sense to you."

"Most of it. I don't agree, but I get it."

"Good. You can help me."

"Any time. How was class?"

"Fine. Did you sleep well?"

"Not as good as I did before you left."

"Got anything planned?"

"I need to see about getting some transportation."

"You can use my car," Blair said.

Jo laughed. "The places I need to go are definitely not anywhere I'd take your car."

"Like where?"

"Trust me, you don't wanna know."

"Yes, I do."

Jo frowned a little. She wanted to keep Blair away from her nighttime activities. "Vampires don't hang out at the mall, Princess. I need to go where they are."

"And you can't take a car?"

"No, I can't take a Porsche. Or a BMW or whatever it is you drive now."

"Why not?"

"It'll be stripped or stolen as soon as I turn my back."

"Oh."

"Yeah. I think a motorcycle will do for now."

"Ok. But you can use my car whenever you need to."

"Thanks." Jo pulled her feet off the table and put the book on it. She rested her elbows on her knees and turned toward Blair. "I, uh, I haven't had anybody since Catherine, not really," she equivocated, when Willow flashed into her memory. "We weren't, you know, but she, uh, she." Jo stopped and stared at the floor. "She cared about me. And I completely failed her. And, I. I don't want to do that with you. I couldn't stand it if something happened to you."

Blair put her hand on Jo's shoulder, and started to say something, but stopped when Jo continued.

"You have to be extra careful, Blair. I love you, and if something happened, I don't know," her voice trailed off. She heard Catherine screaming, and tears fell onto the floor.

Blair slid next to Jo and put her arms around her. She put her head on Jo's shoulder. She didn't realize that Jo was crying until she began to shake. Blair didn't say anything. She slid one hand down, then under Jo's shirt onto her back and stroked her skin. One day, Blair promised herself, Jo would feel safe enough to tell her everything.

Jo made herself stop crying. It did no one any good. She needed a few minutes to get under control, and when she felt she could deal, touched Blair's arm. Blair sat up, but kept her hand in motion on Jo's back. Jo wiped her face before glancing at Blair.

Blair kissed her cheek. "Go wash your face and put on some shoes and we'll see if we can find you a motorcycle."

Jo nodded. When she returned to the living room, she looked more like herself. "There's a Harley place over in Framingham."

"That's not far."


	10. Chapter 5B

Jo walked around, looking at different bikes. She sighed, realizing she didn't have nearly enough to get anything decent.

"What's wrong?"

"Guess I'll be using public transit for a while."

"Why?"

"Need some time to save up."

"How much do you need?"

"Blair, I still owe you for the hospital bill."

"You never owed me anything."

"You are NOT buying me a motorcycle."

"Why? You need it, I can afford it. I don't see a problem."

"It's a problem. C'mon, we'll come back in a couple months."

Blair followed Jo to the car. They got in, but Blair didn't start the engine. "I don't understand why you won't let me do this for you."

"Are you going to let me pay rent?"

"No."

"Buy groceries?"

"No."

"Pay the utilities?"

"Of course not."

"So you're all ready supporting me. That's enough. More than enough."

"Did Catherine support you?"

"That was different," Jo growled.

"How was it different?"

"She was my boss."

"Who's your boss now?"

"Don't have one. They were gonna send somebody to Sunnydale, but I left."

"So call them and tell them to send someone here."

"No."

"Why not?"

"It doesn't work like that. If they know I'm here, they'll make me leave."

"How can they make you do anything?"

"They can hurt you again. They can hurt my mother, or my aunts and uncles, or my cousins. Hell, they can hurt me. Physically. A lot, because they know I'll recover."

"What did they do to you, Jo? You never used to be afraid."

"I never knew how much I could lose."

Blair reached over and took Jo's hand. "I'm not going anywhere, and you aren't leaving again."

"Blair," Jo began.

"No, Jo. You're mine, and I'm going to take care of you."

"Look, I know you have money, and I know seven grand is nothing to you, but it's a lot to me."

"You go out every night and do what you can to make it safer for people you don't even know. You don't get paid to do this. No one helps you. I want to help you, Jo. You won't let me go out with you, so all I can do is make a home for you, and make sure you have whatever tools you need."

"Fine," Jo huffed. "You win."

"Thank you," Blair smiled and opened her door. "Make sure the seat's big enough for both of us," she said before stepping out of the car.

Jo followed Blair back to Wellesley, wondering how, exactly, Blair convinced her to get the biggest machine she could handle, the one with everything on it. At least it was black, and after it got some dirt on it, might not stand out so much.

She pulled into the garage behind Blair and put the bike in the space next to Blair's Mercedes convertible. Blair popped the trunk before getting out and locking her car. "Will you take me for a ride tomorrow?"

"Don't you have school?"

"Tomorrow's Saturday." Blair handed Jo a bag and closed the trunk. Jo followed her to the elevator. They stopped in the lobby, so Blair could make sure there would be no problem with Jo's motorcycle, then went up to the apartment. She went to the living room and picked up the phone, pressed one of the speed dial buttons while Jo stood, holding the bag.

When Blair finished the call, she directed Jo to put the bag in the bedroom. It took Jo longer than Blair thought it would, and she wasn't surprised when Jo was in what she was beginning to think of as her work clothes when she returned.

For the first time, Blair looked at them objectively. Everything showed signs of wear, and the leather jacket and pants needed to be cleaned. The boots would last a little while, but the shirt was showing its age. She nodded a little, making a mental list.

"Don't even think it, Blair."

"Sit down. The pizza takes a while." Blair smiled.

Jo shrugged the jacket off and carefully folded it over the arm of the sofa. She sat next to Blair.

"Will you take me on a ride tomorrow?"

"Sure. Where you wanna go?"

"It's the journey, not the destination."

Jo laughed. "Thought you didn't get philosophy."

"I get some of it. It's a lot easier than chemistry."

When Jo started to get a dark look on her face, Blair moved closer and put her arm around Jo. "Don't. You didn't want to go, remember?"

"Yeah." Jo turned her head. Blair was right there, so Jo kissed her.

Again, it was the phone that interrupted them. Jo growled, and Blair smiled at her. When she finished the call, she stood up and held out her hand. "C'mon."

When they finished eating, Jo left. It was quiet. By midnight, she hadn't encountered anything, and turned back toward the apartment.

Blair was at her desk, and turned in her chair to look at Jo with concern. "Are you all right?"

"I'm great. It's dead out there, excuse the pun."

"That's good, right?"

"I hope so."

Blair stood and stretched. "I was thinking about heading to bed."

"Don't let me stop you." Jo removed her jacket. "As soon as I change, I'll be outta your way," she said, and walked to the bedroom.

Blair was right behind her. "You're not in my way."

Jo sat on the bed and bent over to take off her boots. Blair knelt on the floor and took over. She removed Jo's boots and set them aside. Jo stared, and her eyes remained fixed on Blair as she stood up and unbuttoned the cuffs of her shirt before moving to the strip of buttons down the front.

Jo stood up and seized Blair's wrists. "Not yet," she choked out. To soften her actions, she kissed Blair gently before releasing her. She stepped sideways, away from Blair, and left the room.

Blair stood there for nearly a minute before remembering what she was doing. She moved Jo's boots over by her bag and hung the jacket in the closet. She found Jo's sleep clothes near to the top of the bag and put them on the bed. Blair changed into a nightgown, put on a robe, and went out to the living room.

Jo paced in front of the window, but stopped when she knew Blair was there. She looked at her.

Blair stopped halfway into the room. "Come to bed, Jo."

"I will."

Blair moved closer and held out her hand. "Now," she asked.

Jo stared for a moment, looking from Blair's hand to her face, and found herself moving forward.

When she got in bed, Jo was careful to stay away from Blair, but Blair wasn't having it. She scooted over, lifted Jo's arm, and stretched along Jo's side. Jo put her arm around her while Blair snuggled into her. "Sweet dreams."

"'Night, Princess."

In the morning, Blair was all over her. Jo moved her arms around Blair and buried her face in Blair's hair. It was the first night since Catherine's death that Jo slept without dreams of blood and screaming. Blair did that, Jo knew, just like she knew Blair was the one for her. Jo wasn't in as much of a hurry to settle into domesticity as Blair was, though.

Blair moved, raised her head. "Hi."

"Hi." Jo smiled.

"Time's it?"

"Early."

"Mmmm." Blair returned her head to Jo's chest. "You ready to get up?"

"Not if you're comfortable."

Blair chuckled. "We'll be here forever." She slid her hand under Jo's sleeve and gripped her upper arm. "Last night," she began tentatively, relieved when Jo didn't immediately stop her. "Why did you stop me?"

"Too much too soon."

"Hmmm."

"It hasn't even been a week."

"I understand."

"Do you?"

Blair raised her head. "Yes. I've been waiting for you, but you didn't know that."

"Yeah."

"I can wait a little longer."

"Thank you," Jo said, relief evident in her tone.

"So I guess we should get up. It's going to be a nice day."

"Decided where you want to go?"

"Mystic," Blair said.

"What's that?"

"It's a town in Connecticut. They have some great museums."

"Sounds fun," Jo said unenthusiastically.

"You'll like it." Blair got out of bed and put her robe on. "And it's not too far, less than two hours."

"All right." Jo sat on the edge of the bed.

"Get dressed," Blair instructed, "and I'll make coffee."

It was a nice ride. It was bright and clear, and the foliage was still colorful. Blair directed Jo to the Mystic Seaport Museum. She held Jo's hand while they walked through the exhibits, smiling at Jo's enthusiasm and curiosity about the old ships. They had lunch at the Seaman's Inne, and continued exploring until dusk.

When Jo noticed the time, she apologized to Blair. "We gotta go."

"I know."

"We can come back, right?"

"Certainly," Blair smiled. "I'm glad you enjoyed it."

"I'd like almost anything if you were there."

"I may have to test that theory."

"I said almost," Jo cautioned.

They stopped for dinner on the way back, and Jo went upstairs with Blair, who followed her to the bedroom and watched Jo gear up for patrol.

"I still can't believe you use a piece of wood more than anything else."

Jo shrugged. "Simple creatures, simple tool."

"You'll be careful?"

"Always."

Jo tried to leave, but Blair stopped her. She kissed Jo thoroughly before turning her toward the door with a smack on the butt.

Jo went first to the coffee shop. It wasn't busy, and Amy leaned on the counter so they could talk quietly. "How was dinner?"

"My mom's a lousy cook, but the company's good. Did you find them?"

"Yeah. There any more I need to worry about?"

Amy shook her head. "Just stragglers until the next bunch migrates out here."

Jo nodded.

"You should get a priest to bless your girlfriend's place, just to be safe."

"Yeah, I'm gonna go to mass tomorrow morning. I'll talk to Father afterward."

"Talk to Father Mike," the vampire suggested, and described him. "He'll be a little more receptive to your uh, status."

"How's that?"

"Vampire killed his sister."

"Gotcha. How do you know where I'm staying?"

"Please," Amy said condescendingly. "This is a small town. Big fish like Blair Warner just stops doing everything but going to class because some hot leather chick showed up is big news."

"So, what, everybody knows my business?"

"Not all of it. But you are the topic of discussion in several circles. The sooner she goes back to what she was doing, the sooner it will stop."

"Great," Jo sighed.

"Let her show you off a little."

"Do you know her or something?"

"I've seen her once or twice, but mostly it's what I hear."

"Great," Jo sighed again.

"Back to work," Amy said cheerfully.

"Easy for you to say," Jo muttered, and stalked out of the coffee shop.

She walked back to the apartment building and went down to the garage. She followed the signs into Boston, and soon found the part of town she was looking for. She parked her bike behind a diner and started walking the streets.

Jo thought again how alike vampires and rats were as she stalked her prey through the shadows. There were again dozens of them lying in wait, and she went through them without much thought.

After the bars closed, it got quieter on the main strip, and Jo decided to call it a night. She stopped in the diner and ate a huge breakfast, then went back to get her bike, happy that it was where she left it and appeared untouched.

Without traffic, the ride back took only 20 minutes. She went upstairs, took a shower, and got into bed. She woke at sunrise and slipped out of bed. She dressed in her last set of clean clothes, thinking that her mother would have a fit if she saw her going to mass looking like she did.

While Jo waited for the coffee to brew, she thought about calling her mother. If she and Blair stayed together, there would be no way she could stay invisible. They would be in New York, and photographers were unavoidable. She'd seen Blair in the _Times_ several times, mostly at holidays and during the summer when she went with one parent or the other to a charitable function.

There were other things to consider, too. Once her mother knew she was back, she would insist that Jo see the rest of her family. She would have to explain where she was and what she did. Not to mention facing the disappointment of all of them, who expected her to be the first one on either side of the family to go to college.

Jo fixed her coffee and went into the living room. She stood at the window, thinking for the first time about all of the implications of her decision to return to Blair. After half an hour, her coffee was cold and she was sick of thinking. Things would play out however they would, and she could do nothing but deal with events as they occurred. She put the coffee in the sink, grabbed her jacket from the sofa and left.

Jo was the youngest person at early mass. She recognized Father Mike leading the service, and after he dismissed them, she approached him.

"Father."

"How can I help you?"

"I'm Jo, Jo Polniaczek. I'm new here, and a friend suggested I ask you to bless my apartment."

"I'll be happy to, Jo."

"I need you to be real thorough. My, uh, my roommate doesn't really understand what's out there."

"Out there?"

"After dark."

"Ah, it's you."

"Excuse me?"

"I was told you'd be coming."

"So you know who I am?"

"I do. It's a small world, Jo." Father Mike smiled, remembering the series of phone calls he received about her. The first was almost a year ago, from a seminary classmate assigned to a small town in California; the most recent a few nights ago from the sister he still missed. "I can come by this afternoon."

"Thank you, Father." She gave him the address.

"I'll be there around two."

"Thanks again."

Blair was gone when Jo returned, but a note waited on the refrigerator. "Jo, I went to church. I'll be back before noon. Love, Blair."

Blair carried a bag of food when she came back. While they ate, Jo told her that she'd asked a priest to bless the apartment.

"Great minds," Blair smiled.

"Oh?"

"I asked my minister to do the same thing. He'll be here around four."

"Father Mike's coming at two."

"Good."

"I need to do some laundry."

"Um, I usually just take everything to the cleaner."

"I don't have anything else to wear."

"Guess we'll have to correct that, won't we?"

"No, WE won't. I'll get some stuff tomorrow."

"You're going to need more than used clothes."

"Don't be such a snob."

"I'm not. Well, I guess I am, but there are some things coming up that need more than jeans."

"Like what? And when were you going to tell me?"

"Parties. Dinners. Dinner parties. It's quiet now, but as the holidays get closer, there'll be several." Blair smiled at Jo. "I'd love you to be my escort. Will you go with me, Jo?"

Jo let her sweat for nearly a minute. "Yes," she said finally.

"Thank you. So we can go clothes shopping this week?"

"Only if you don't go overboard."

"I like going overboard. Especially for you."

"I noticed."

"You like it, too," Blair smiled.

"Not really."

"So you don't like the motorcycle?"

"I like it fine."

"I rest my case." Blair stood up and took their plates from the table to the sink. When she turned back to get the glasses and cutlery, Jo was right behind her with them in her hands. She reached around Blair and put them in the sink. When she tried to move away, Blair stopped her.

Jo allowed a few kisses before she forced herself away and moved to the doorway. "So, uh, is the laundry in the basement or what?"

"I don't really know. Call the lobby and ask."

"No laundry," Jo reported a few minutes later when Blair joined her on the couch. "Closest place is a block away." She checked the time. "Guess I'll have to go tonight."

"I have all morning classes tomorrow, so we can go find you some clothes tomorrow afternoon."

Jo rolled her eyes. "I don't suppose we can just go someplace around here."

"I'd rather go to New York."

"Tell you what," Jo suggested. "Let me get everyday stuff tomorrow, and we'll go to New York when you finish classes Friday. I mean, your mom still has a place in the city, right?"

Blair lit up. "That's a great idea! Mother's in Europe somewhere, so we'll have it to ourselves. I'll let the staff know we're coming."

Jo made a face at the mention of staff. "And I'll go down and see Ma Sunday morning."

Blair became serious. "Do you want me to go with you?"

"I think I do," Jo replied after a few seconds' thought.

The phone rang, and Jo answered it since she was closer. When she hung up, she told Blair, "Father Mike's early."

Jo let him into the apartment when he knocked on the door, and made introductions. They let him perform his duties. Jo noted that he made certain to mark both sides of all the doorways and didn't forget the windows. When he finished, Jo left Blair to make conversation while she got coffee for all of them. He didn't stay long, and Jo walked him to the elevator.

While they waited for it, he told Jo, "I marked your door before going in."

"Thank you."

"She's a keeper, Jo."

"Uh, she," Jo fumbled.

"I know what doctrine says. I also know that love is the most sacred of the commandments." The elevator arrived, and he entered the car. "See you Sunday."

"We'll be away."

"The week after, then."

"Definitely. Thank you again, Father."

"Stay safe."

Jo nodded as the doors closed. She went back to the apartment. "I'm gonna go take care of the laundry now."

"I'll come with you."

Jo nodded and went to the bedroom. She took everything but her clothes out of the duffel. Blair waited by the door, their jackets over her arm, when she returned.

It didn't take long for Jo's clothes to wash and dry, and she folded them neatly and repacked them in the clean bag. They were back at the apartment in an hour and a half, and split the Sunday paper between them while they waited for Blair's minister.

He was more uptight than Father Mike, performed a cursory blessing and excused himself.

Once he was gone, Jo returned to the paper. She paid special attention to the crime news, but found nothing remarkable.

* * *

><p>Jo woke at mid-morning. She dressed, gathered some cash, and left the apartment. She grabbed a cup of coffee and walked toward the first vampire lair. She was pleased that it was still empty, and took her time going through the place. It held a lot of junk, but she found more cash and some nice jewelry. She eyed the computers, but had no idea what she was looking at, and left them.<p>

At the second house, she found and staked two sleeping vampires. She searched the place, taking cash and jewelry and leaving the other items. There was a telephone directory in the kitchen, and she used it to locate pawnshops. Two were close to the Goodwill store, so Jo began the walk.

She sold a few items in each shop, then went to the Goodwill. She found three pair of jeans, one of them black, and several shirts. The checkout clerk gave her directions to the nearest department store, and Jo went there next to get socks and underwear. From there, she returned to the Laundromat to wash all her purchases. It was nearly dark when she got back to the apartment.

Blair wasn't there, which worried Jo a little. She put her clothes away in the drawer Blair emptied for her use, and hung her jeans in the closet. Then she went into the living room and began to pace.

Two hours later, Blair came in, her arms full of bags.

"Are you all right?" Jo went to the door and took some of them. "Where have you been?"

"I'm fine, Jo. Did you have dinner yet? I got Thai. How was your day?"

Jo settled down when she was sure Blair was unhurt. "It was fine. I got some stuff."

"Anything special?"

"Nah. What's all this?"

"Groceries." Blair put the takeout bags on the table and started unpacking the others. Jo watched her, noting where things went. When Blair finished, she pulled plates from the cabinet and looked at Jo for the first time. "No patrol tonight?"

"Later. I was waiting for you."

"Unpack the food," Blair said, and finished getting the things they would need to eat.

Jo went out late, after dinner and cleaning up and several steamy kisses. She was glad she had the ride into Boston to cool off.

"I'll be late tomorrow night," Blair told Jo over Tuesday dinner.

"How late and why?"

"Study group at the library. We usually finish around 8:30."

"I'll pick you up."

"That'll be nice."

Jo's ears rang with Amy's unsolicited advice to let Blair show her off. "Should I worry about dinner?"

"Just yours."

* * *

><p>Jo arrived at the library at 8:15. She entered, looked around, and decided to wait in the entrance. She tried not to pace. Ten minutes later, Blair appeared, several young women with her. She smiled at Jo, took her hand, and introduced her to her friends.<p>

Jo exchanged greetings with each of the five, and offered to walk them to their dorms. Blair squeezed her hand and kissed her cheek, and her friends laughed at Jo's blush but accepted her offer.

After Jo accompanied Blair to the apartment, she decided to walk through the campus again. It was still quiet, and shortly after midnight, she went to the coffee shop, got her regular order and waited for Amy to join her.

"What's new, Slayer?"

"Nothing. Anything I need to know about?"

"Apart from you and Blair being the cutest couple ever, no."

"Who told you that?"

"I have my sources," Amy grinned cheekily.

"The whole stalker vibe is a real turnoff."

"Oh, c'mon. I told you, it's a small town. I have great hearing."

Jo glared at her.

"All right, all right, my roommate saw you doing laundry."

"Great," Jo sighed.

Amy winked at her. "Gotta go. Be careful out there."

The rest of the night, and the rest of the week, was quiet. When Blair returned from class on Friday, Jo had their bags waiting, and they left without delay, and arrived before 4 p.m. The apartment was empty, Jo noted happily, and she followed Blair to her room, a bag in each hand.

"We can get started shopping now," Blair suggested.

"Can't we just, you know, take a walk or something?"

"Excuses won't save you, Jo."

"You'll be draggin' me around all day tomorrow," Jo pleaded.

"Fine," Blair relented. "We'll take a walk and get some dinner. I suppose it's too much to ask that you take a night off so we can go to the theatre or something."

"Next time."

"You know I'll hold you to that."

"Wouldn't expect anything else." Jo picked up their coats, which Blair carried up, and they left.

The streets were busy, but they didn't notice. Jo let Blair lead her through the streets. They talked and laughed, and Blair did some window-shopping. They had an early dinner, with a bottle of wine, and walked leisurely back to the apartment. Jo ignored, other than checking that they were safe, the warning tingles on the back of her neck.

Jo tried to leave Blair in the lobby, but Blair held on to her hand, and Jo rode the elevator with her. When she tried to leave, Blair told her, "I hate being here alone."

"You can't come with me."

"You could stay."

"And do what?"

Blair kissed her, holding nothing back. They were both breathing hard when they separated minutes later. "We talked about this," Jo said.

"No, I don't think we did," Blair said, gently guiding Jo deeper into the penthouse. "We talked about sex, and we agreed to wait, but you didn't say anything about kissing."

"Is that was that was?"

Blair kissed her again. After a time, she left Jo's lips, leaving a line of kisses along her jaw. "Stay," she said huskily, and continued her exploration along Jo's neck.

Jo shifted her head to allow it and slipped out of her jacket. It fell to the floor, where Blair's joined it moments later. Jo pulled Blair's blouse out of her skirt and slid her hands up her back. Blair smiled and made her way back to Jo's lips, one hand on her rear, the other massaging the back of Jo's head.

Neither knew how much time passed before they slowed and finally stopped. "Stay," Blair asked again.

Jo nodded.

* * *

><p>They were in Bloomingdale's at 10:05 a.m. Jo deliberately dressed in the most worn jeans she had, the sneakers she should have thrown out in Georgia, and one of the shirts she bought earlier in the week. Blair recognized the tantrum and pretended she didn't notice. Everything was clean, and making Jo change would only take time and leave them both out of sorts.<p>

Jo obediently tried on everything Blair suggested. She had to admit that Blair was choosing things that matched her tastes, and that she really enjoyed the look on Blair's face when she stepped out of the dressing room in some of the selections.

That was the start of a really long day. By the end of it, the driver had carried dozens of bags to the car, and Jo was worn out. She lost count of how many times she changed her clothes before they left the first store. She wasn't even sure what time it was, only that it was dark and she was hungry.

Jo's arms were full of bags. Blair carried a few, and the driver made two trips with the rest. Jo smelled food, dropped the bags on the couch, and detoured to the kitchen. There was no one there, so Jo checked the oven. It was full of casserole dishes. "Yes!" she said and started looking for potholders.

"In the drawer on the left," Blair said from the doorway, amused. "Though it won't be ready until the timer goes off."

Jo looked at the stove and sighed. Another 20 minutes.

"C'mon, we'll figure out what you're going to wear to see your mother."

"No," Jo said firmly. "You pick something. I'm done."

"You just have to look," Blair coaxed.

Jo sighed. "I don't wanna," she whined.

Blair laughed and held out her hand. "C'mon."

They went back to the living room and Jo frowned at the pile of bags. "Please tell me some of this is for you."

"Some of it," Blair agreed, and started going through bags. She pulled a pair of pants from one bag, a blouse from another, shoes from a third, and showed the combination to Jo.

"Perfect," Jo said. She didn't really care what she wore, but Blair obviously did. A few minutes later, Blair showed her a dress and pair of shoes. "Unh unh, I like the pants."

"This is for me."

"In that case, it's great." The timer went off and Jo jumped up.


	11. Chapter 6A

You said patience, well I've been waiting  
>I've been holding the hands of time<br>Something you said  
>You said faith and not one thing's shaken<br>This heart of mine  
><em>Something You Said<em>

They got up early and took a cab. Blair hadn't realized they were going to church until Jo told the driver their destination.

"Why aren't you going to the house?" she asked.

"She'll call the priest anyway," Jo said. "Figured I'd just cut out the middleman."

Mass was underway when they arrived, and they sat in the last row of pews. Jo spotted her mother early, and frowned at how much older she looked. Blair was interested in the service, the first non-Protestant one she'd attended.

Jo's mother was one of the last up the aisle. When she got close, Jo stepped into the aisle. "Ma."

Rose screamed, and the young priest who assisted with the service came running.

"Ma, it's all right."

Rose wrapped her arms around Jo and hugged her. Jo hugged her back, and swallowed her tears. Blair stood beside her, touching her back gently, and Jo smiled at her.

When Rose let go, she swatted at Jo. "Where have you been? Why didn't you call or write? Do you have any idea what you put me through?"

"I'm sorry, Ma."

"Home, Joanna Marie, now," Rose commanded.

"Ma, this is my friend, Blair."

"Nice to meet you. You come, too. March, Joanna."

Jo glared at Blair, who struggled not to laugh at the sight of Jo being treated like she was much younger and in a world of trouble.

Rose kept up a stream of questions but didn't give Jo time to answer any of them on the two-block walk to her apartment. The neighborhood, Jo saw, was much the same, and her childhood home was unchanged except for new curtains. Rose sat Jo and Blair on the sofa and sat in a chair across from them.

"Tell me what was so important that you couldn't call."

Jo decided to tell her mother the truth. "You know, the priests tell us all the time that demons are real."

"Of course, they are."

"Well, good has soldiers just like evil."

"Angels."

"Not all of them."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm a vampire slayer, Ma. That's what I been doin', and I just got back to Boston a couple weeks ago. This is the first chance I had to get to you."

"You could have called."

"Sorry." Jo hung her head. "I just, I knew you'd want to see me right away, so I didn't."

"You're coming home, right?"

"No, Ma, I can't."

"What, there's no vampires in the Bronx?"

"I doubt that," Blair said.

"Don't help," Jo hissed at her.

Rose turned her attention to Blair. "Who are you?"

"She's a friend from school, Ma."

"I asked her."

"I'm Blair Warner, Mrs. Polniaczek. I met Jo at Eastland."

"You her girl?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Ma!"

"Hush, Jo. You take good care of her."

"I'll do my best. We'll visit again at Thanksgiving."

"Good. Why not sooner?"

"I'm in college. It keeps me busy."

"Are you in college, Jo?"

"No, Ma."

"Why not?"

"I never graduated from high school." Jo braced herself for the blast she knew would come.

"You didn't tell me that," Blair said.

"Why didn't you graduate? How are you gonna get a good job?"

"I got a job, Ma." Jo ignored Blair for the time being. "I don't need a piece of paper to do it."

"What, God brings manna from heaven? How do you pay the bills?"

"Ma, don't worry. I'm all right."

Blair spoke up, wanting to put Jo's mother at ease, and earned a murderous glare from Jo. "Jo lives with me, Mrs. Polniaczek."

"You rich or something?" Rose asked skeptically.

"Or something," Blair said, smiling. "I promise you that Jo will always have a safe place to stay. She won't have to worry about anything except her job." Blair pretended she couldn't see the filthy looks Jo threw her.

"Stop looking at her like that, Jo," her mother snapped. "You promise?"

"I promise," Blair repeated.

"Thank you." Rose returned her attention to Jo. "What, exactly, is your job?"

"I hunt vampires."

"That's it."

"So far. I hope it's all it ever is," Jo said fervently, recalling tales of averted apocalypses in Sunnydale.

"You're careful."

"I'm very careful."

"You been to see your aunt and uncle yet?"

Jo hung her head again. "No, Ma. I'll go out and see them this week."

"You better. I'm gonna call and let them know you're coming."

"How's Pop?"

Rose waved a hand in the air. "Last I heard, he went out west."

"If he calls or anything let him know I'm ok."

"Of course. Why you runnin' off all ready?"

"We need to pack and get on the road. Blair has an early class tomorrow."

"You have a phone number?"

"Of course," Blair answered. "I'll write it down for you."

Rose nodded. She got up and went into another room, and returned with a pad and pen, which she handed to Blair. Blair wrote their address and phone number and handed it back.

"Thank you," she told Blair, then looked at Jo. "Don't you ever do that again."

"I won't, Ma. Blair, there's a phone in the kitchen." Jo pointed. "Could you call a cab, please?"

Blair nodded and left them alone.

"I'm sorry, Ma. I missed you. I'll call you next Sunday, ok?"

"You better. And be nice to that girl. She loves you."

"I know she does. She's the only person I met who's more stubborn than you."

"You need that."

"You seen any of the gang?"

"They're all married or in jail."

"What about Sandy?"

"She's in jail, Jo. Don't worry about her. You got something better."

"I know, Ma. I was just askin'."

Blair came back and told them, "It's on the way."

"Good," Jo said. She hugged her mother, still surprised at how small she seemed. "I'll call you," she promised.

"I love you, Jo. Be careful."

"I will, Ma. Love you, too." Jo squeezed her one more time, but it was a few more seconds before Rose let her go.

Rose hugged Blair, too, and Blair smiled while she returned it. "We'll see you for Thanksgiving."

On the curb, waiting for the cab, Blair said, "Your mother's very nice."

"She likes you."

"Good, since I'm sticking around."

"You didn't have to tell her all that stuff."

"What stuff?"

"That you're taking care of me."

"You'd rather she worry?"

"No." Jo saw the cab coming. "I just wasn't, I don't know, Blair. It feels weird. And you promised her you'll always take care of me."

"I will, Jo." Blair stepped off the curb.

Jo held the cab door open for her and waited for her to enter before getting in. Blair gave the cabbie the address and turned back to Jo.

"Why wouldn't I? In the unlikely event that something happened to us, what you do is important, and the least I can do is make certain you can concentrate on it."

Jo stared at her while she tried to process what Blair said.

Blair looked back at her. "I keep my promises, Jo, just like you keep yours."

Jo continued to stare, and Blair wondered what she was thinking. When she couldn't stand Jo's silence any longer, Blair moved closer and picked up Jo's hand. While she examined it, Jo laid her head on Blair's shoulder.

"She looked so old," Jo said quietly.

"Worrying does that. She'll look better next time."

"I shoulda wrote her like I did you."

"Sweetheart, what's done is done. Don't beat yourself up over it."

"But."

"No," Blair said firmly and squeezed Jo's hand. "Look forward."

"I'm really lookin' forward to seein' my aunt and uncle," Jo said sarcastically.

"Do you want me to go?"

"Yes," Jo said finally, "but you're not. I'll patrol when I leave there."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah," Jo sighed. "Thanks for coming with me today."

"It was my pleasure. I really enjoyed meeting your mother."

"I guess I'll meet yours at Thanksgiving."

"Yes. Officially, since you met her before."

"It's not gonna be a jeans and t-shirt kinda thing, is it?"

"No. You'll be fine."

Jo nodded.

Their moods lightened when they returned to the penthouse. They changed clothes before packing their bags. They heated up leftovers for lunch, and cleaned everything up before beginning the trips necessary to carry everything down to Blair's car. It took two trips, and they carried the last of the bags down when they were ready to leave.

Blair handed Jo the keys and let her drive back to Wellesley. Emptying the car seemed to take longer than packing it, and the bed was piled high with bags when they finished. Blair started the process of unpacking everything. Jo stayed out of the way.

Jo walked through Wellesley on patrol that night, and came home early. The next day, she started working out a plan to take care of all the cities surrounding the college town before she tackled Boston proper again. She also called her aunt and agreed to come by for a brief visit that evening. She and Blair had dinner together, and Blair offered again to accompany Jo, who declined the offer.

The visit with her aunt and uncle wasn't as strained as Jo thought it would be. They hugged her and fussed over her, and let her leave when she said she had to, but not until she promised to return for dinner the next week with Blair. Jo rode over toward the mall, and parked between the cemeteries. She went through them quickly, and caught two new vampires rising. Before leaving, she stood for a few minutes at the spot where she met Catherine. Then, she hurried home to Blair, wanting nothing more to hold her and pretend for a few moments that she had a normal life.

* * *

><p>Despite Jo's urging, the only activity Blair maintained outside her classes was her study group, and Jo made sure she was at the library at 8:15 every week to pick up Blair and leave her friends at their dorms on the way home. Every other night, they ate dinner together before Jo went out to patrol.<p>

When two huge packages arrived, Jo left them untouched by the door. Blair got her to carry them to the bedroom. She wanted to fuss when Blair opened them, but Blair pre-empted her with a reminder of exactly how cold winter would be. Jo had to admit that lined jeans and soft wool shirts would help cut the cold. The leather pants, Blair said, were for her own benefit.

Jo attended early mass on Sundays, making it her last stop before home. Blair was gone by the time she got home, and returned after her church service with brunch and the Sunday paper.

Jo stopped in at the coffee shop at least once a week. Amy always had news of another vampire nest, and Jo worked her way back toward Boston. After her initial visit to the red-light district, she wasn't eager to return, but she did, at least once a week. The women there were grateful for her protection, since Jo tolerated abusive pimps as much as she tolerated vampires.

That attitude got her into trouble one night in late October. Jo was ambushed in an alley but a mixed gang of punks and vampires. As hard as she fought, there were too many of them. Fortunately, she had enough sense to concentrate on the vampires first, and they were dust by the time Jo went down.

She woke up in a hospital bed, in more pain than she'd ever been in before. The slight movements of her head to check out the extent of her injuries made her moan. "Shit," Jo swore.

"You're awake!" Blair stood up and gently took Jo's hand.

"Seems like."

"What happened?"

"I lost."

"I figured that." Blair touched Jo's face gently with her other hand.

"How long was I out?"

"Almost a week."

"How long 'til I can go home?"

"I don't know."

Jo realized something then. "Why aren't you in class?"

"Why do you think? You've been in a coma, Jo. The trash collectors found you in an alley. They thought you were dead." The tightness of Blair's voice was the only indicator of her stress. The message on her answering machine made her drop everything and race into Boston. She had been terrified the first time she saw Jo, nearly covered in bandages and casts, completely unrecognizable amidst the tubes, wires, and hoses.

Jo squeezed Blair's hand. It was the only movement she could make. "I'll be fine," she said hoarsely, and an odd look crossed her face. Moments later, she lost control of her body. She would have thrashed, had she been able to move.

The screaming machinery brought a nurse running. Blair remained where she was. Jo had been doing this the entire time, and Blair knew that an injection was coming, one that would slow the disjointed movements.

"She was awake," Blair told the nurse once the seizure passed.

"How was she?"

"Coherent."

"How long?"

"Less than a minute."

"That's a good sign." The nurse patted Blair's shoulder on her way out of the room. "She'll be out for a few hours."

Blair nodded and returned to her seat. She was tempted to take a leave of absence from school, but her schoolmates agreed to help her keep up with the work. One or two of her study group came to the hospital every evening except Wednesday, when all of them came and they took over the cafeteria. Blair spent the rest of the time reading, and talking to Jo, believing that she would eventually answer.

* * *

><p>It took another two days for Jo to regain consciousness. Blair asked her to wake up, and Jo grumbled, "I'm up."<p>

"How do you feel sweetheart?"

"Did I get hit by a bus or somethin'?"

"You don't remember?"

"Last thing I remember was talking to you."

Blair relaxed a tiny bit and smiled. "You had a seizure."

"That sounds fun," Jo said sarcastically.

"Not exactly how I'd put it."

"Can we go home?"

"Soon," Blair promised.

A nurse came in for a regular check. "Sleeping beauty awakes," she said cheerfully. "You need to answer some questions for me, all right?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Not really," the nurse answered. "What's your name?"

"Jo Polniaczek."

"Where are you?"

"Hospital."

"Where?"

"Boston, I guess."

"Who's the president?"

"Damn if I know."

"What year is it?"

"1999."

"Good job."

"Then I can go home?"

The nurse laughed. "You're a long way from home, sweetie. I'll be back in an hour."

"I wanna go home," Jo told Blair.

"I know. As soon as you're allowed."

One of Blair's classmates entered the room. "Hey, Blair, I brought notes." She saw Jo's open eyes and smiled hugely. "Jo!"

"Hey."

"I can't believe you're awake."

"Thanks for the notes."

"Jo, Amy said to tell you not to worry. She's been keeping things under control."

Jo nodded. She was fading fast. Blair saw and leaned over to brush her lips. "Love you, sweetheart."

"Mmmm," Jo answered, and was out again.

Blair turned to her friend. "Who's Amy?"

"Friend of my roommate."

"What's she doing that concerns Jo?"

"I don't know. I'm just the messenger."

"I want to talk to her."

"Blair, I'm just the messenger."

"Then you can give her my message. Thanks for the notes."

"You're welcome. I'll see you soon."

Jo woke again a few hours later. "Hey."

Blair was beside the bed in a flash. "Hey."

"You should go home, get some sleep."

"I will."

"Tonight."

"Soon," Blair countered. "How do you feel?"

"What's the doctor say?"

"Oh, the doctors say a lot."

"Blair."

"Jo, I promise we'll talk about it tomorrow."

"You've been here the whole time."

"Yes. I called your mother, and Father Mike's been by every day. Your aunt comes every other day."

"Is Ma losin' her mind?"

"Not any more. I call her with an update every morning."

"How are you?"

"A lot better now." Blair raised Jo's hand and kissed it.

Jo tried to smile, but things were getting hazy. Her eyes fluttered shut, despite her efforts to keep them open. Blair stood and watched her for several minutes before returning to the recliner.

Jo had another seizure during the night, but still woke up several times the next day. Blair cataloged the list of injuries the doctors initially described to her. The superficial ones were healed. The others were healing faster than the doctors thought they would. The seizures were what worried them, and Blair, the most.

Jo got out of bed that afternoon, and sat in the recliner Blair had been spending so much time in. Blair sat beside her in another chair stroking Jo's fingers. Jo smiled at her, content for the moment.

They didn't know what triggered the seizure, but Blair was able to slide Jo onto the floor before she threw herself from the chair. As happened every time, a nurse came in and injected something in the I.V. port that overrode the electrical storm in her brain and made her unconscious.

Blair and the nurse worked together to return Jo to bed, and Blair returned to her vigil.

After visiting hours, a stranger entered Jo's room. Blair stood up automatically. The woman looked her up and down. "You must be Blair," she said. "I'm Amy."

Blair got right to the point. "Why are you sending messages to Jo?"

"I don't want her to worry about." Amy stopped, wondering how much Jo told Blair.

"Patrol?" Blair suggested.

"Is that what she calls it?"

Blair nodded.

"Fine. I don't want her to worry about patrol. I've got it covered."

"Thanks," Jo said weakly.

Amy beat Blair to Jo's bedside. "There's a new Slayer," she said quietly.

Jo groaned. "Where?"

"Boston."

"Why here?"

Amy shrugged. "Get better. I had to quit my job to cover for you."

"You'll get another one." Jo tried to grin. "Walmart greeter."

"You'll have to do better than that."

"Hey, make sure Blair gets home safe."

Amy nodded.

"I'm not leaving," Blair told them.

"Go home and sleep in your own bed tonight," Jo told her. "I'll be right here when you come back tomorrow."

"I'm not leaving."

"Please, Blair," Jo asked, exhausted by the brief conversation.

"No." Blair turned to Amy. "Thank you for what you're doing to help."

"I'll see you around," Amy said, knowing Blair wasn't going to budge.

Jo was all ready sliding back into sleep.

She woke with a start hours later. Blair was beside her comforting her, and Jo was initially confused over where she was. The dream, more vivid than any she'd had before, was a jumble of blood and fear. She remembered Buffy, and wondered why the other Slayer would be on her mind after so many months. Then she recalled Amy's news, that Boston had a new Slayer.

Jo was still awake when her primary doctor came in for morning rounds. She fidgeted while he examined her. "She's doing well," he told Blair.

"'She's' sittin' right here and can hear just fine," Jo said grumpily. "She wants to go home."

"I'll talk to the neurologist later today. If she says it's ok, it's fine with me."

"Why can't you talk to her now?" Jo demanded.

He looked at Blair. "You've got your hands full."

Blair smiled fondly at Jo. "You have no idea."

* * *

><p>It was another week before Jo was discharged. It took the neurologist that long to find a combination of medicines that reduced the number of seizures. Jo left the hospital with a sheaf of papers, a bag of pills, and a list of follow-up appointments.<p>

Jo was surprised how tired the ride home made her. She leaned into a corner of the sofa and dozed while Blair made phone calls and went through the mail. She ate the sandwich Blair brought her for lunch, and took a fistful of pills without comment. When Blair suggested a nap, Jo said, "Only if you come."

Blair nodded and held out her hand. Jo let Blair pull her up, and they went to the bedroom. Blair pulled the covers back and sat Jo on the bed. She removed Jo's shoes and had her stand up. Blair loosened her belt and pushed Jo's jeans off without unfastening them, then sat Jo down again. "Lay down," Blair told her. "I'll be right there."

Jo did as she was told, and watched Blair change out of her clothes and into one of Jo's t-shirts. Blair got into bed and moved over beside Jo. She snuggled up to her. "I missed this."

"Me too," Jo answered. She kissed Blair's head. "You going back to class tomorrow?"

"Yes."

"You going to leave me with a babysitter?"

"Yes," Blair answered, skipping the semantic argument. Jo didn't care that the people who would stay with her were medical professionals.

"Were you there the whole time?"

"Pretty much. The girls brought me clean clothes and took the dirty ones away. I think I have a huge backlog at the dry cleaner."

"Mmmm."

Blair smiled at the noncommittal sound. She knew Jo was nearly asleep. Asleep in their bed for the first time in far too long, she thought. She had been so close to losing Jo, and she wondered whether she would ever be able to let her out of her sight. She heard Amy and Jo say something about a new Slayer in Boston. If someone else could patrol, there was no need for Jo to risk her life. That talk, Blair knew, would lead to a huge argument when they got to it.

For the moment, she didn't care. Jo's arms were around her, and Jo's scent surrounded her, and Jo's heart beat steadily in her ear. Blair could relax for the first time in weeks, and she was asleep soon after Jo.

* * *

><p>After a week at home with nothing to do, Jo was going stir crazy. She still felt off. The headache didn't quit, and she had spells of dizziness and nausea. The medications made her feel sluggish and disconnected. She couldn't read, because she had trouble focusing on both the words and their meaning. Television made her headache worse. Feeling so uncomfortable in her skin made her cranky. She began to be able to tell when a seizure was coming, and would go lie in the middle of the bed. She felt worse when they were over, and when she refused the extra pills the nurse tried to force on her afterward, she got an injection instead.<p>

Blair did her best not to worry about Jo. She knew she was safe, and that the nurses she paid to stay with her would keep an eye on her. Still, the first day she came home from class to find Jo passed out in bed unnerved her. She sent the nurse home, undressed, and lay as close to Jo as she could. When Jo put her arms around her, Blair relaxed a tiny bit.

On Wednesday morning, Jo insisted that Blair go to her study group that evening. At 8 p.m., Jo grabbed her jacket and left. She took the stairs, ignoring the nurse who followed her, insisting that she return to the apartment. Jo took off in a sprint as soon as she was out of the lobby, and the nurse was left behind. At 8:15, she was in the library entrance like she always was. She saw Amy there, and walked up behind her.

"What're you doin' here?"

"Making sure your friends get home safe."

"I got it."

Amy looked at Jo skeptically.

"I swear if you start, I'll stake you right here," Jo growled. "I'm sick of everybody treatin' me like I'm an invalid."

"Well, Miss I'm Not An Invalid, you better sit down."

"Why?"

"Cause you're gonna have a seizure in the next five minutes."

"Bullshit."

Amy shrugged and changed the subject. "New Slayer's starting to get the hang of things."

"Yeah? Where's she?"

"Boston. Her Watcher's keeping her in cemeteries right now."

"Anything else goin' on?"

"Nothing unusual. Since you cleared out those two nests, it's been pretty quiet around here."

"Good."

"You really don't look good."

"I hate you." Jo spaced out then. Her eyes rolled back and she lost control of her muscles.

Amy caught her and gently lowered her to the floor. "Stubborn Slayer," she muttered.

Blair and her friends came out of the library in time to see the vampire help Jo. Blair knelt across from Amy, and her friends stood around them, forming a circle to help keep others away.

The seizure lasted nearly a minute, but it took several more for Jo to regain her senses. She saw Blair and tried to smile. "Hi."

Blair decided to wait until they were alone to let Jo know how upset she was. "Hi."

"Came to walk you home," Jo slurred, and tried to sit up.

"I think we'll just get a cab."

"Just need a minute," Jo protested.

"I think you'll need a little longer than that," Amy said.

Jo glared at her, and Amy smirked back. "Help me up," Jo told the vampire.

Amy stood up and grabbed Jo's hand. She pulled her to her feet, and caught her when Jo wasn't able to get her balance right away. "Tell you what," Amy said. "You and Blair hang out here while I make sure they get to the dorms, and then I'll come back for you two."

"Thank you," Blair said before Jo could object. She put her arm around Jo's waist and led her toward the nearest reading area.

"All right, ladies, off we go."

Since Amy had been doing this since Jo first got hurt, they followed her out of the library without question.

"What the heck are you doing here?" Blair asked.

"I came to walk you home."

"I appreciate that, I really do. But you're not ready to do this much yet. You're supposed to be home recuperating."

"I'm sick of staying home."

"I know it's hard."

"You don't know. I should be out doing my job, and I can't even go for a 10 minute walk without it turning into some big production."

"Jo, the doctors couldn't even guess how many times you got hit in the head. You need to let your brain heal."

"And what if it doesn't?"

"You need to give it time," Blair insisted. "Please, Jo, if you won't do it for yourself, do it for me."

Jo looked away, across the library. That was her greatest fear, that the damage was permanent. She couldn't imagine living like this, on a short leash, always waiting for the next interruption. She couldn't fight this, couldn't do anything to change her condition. But she knew she would do anything for Blair, and she nodded.

They didn't talk while they waited for Amy to return, or on the walk home. Once they were there, Blair calmed the upset nurse and sent her on her way. She went to the bedroom and found Jo all ready in bed. She sat beside her. "Do you need anything?"

"You."

"I'll be right back," Blair said. She went around the bed and got her nightgown, then went to the bathroom to change. When she returned, Jo's eyes were closed. Blair turned out the light and got into bed with Jo. When she snuggled up to Jo, she put her arms around Blair.

* * *

><p>On Sunday morning, they got up and went to mass. Afterward, they waited for the rest of the parishioners to leave before approaching Father Mike.<p>

"Jo, you're looking much better."

"Thanks, Father."

"What can I do for you?"

"There's another girl, another one like me."

"Yes, I know, in California. She's busy with something out of the ordinary."

"No, Father, there's a new girl in Boston."

"Oh." His face fell. "I'm so sorry, Jo."

"What? No, that's not what I, uh."

"Jo, what's going on?"

Father Mike looked at Blair. "She didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

Jo gave the priest a dirty look. "A new Slayer is called when one dies."

"You died?" Blair gasped.

"Apparently," Jo said. "Father, can you warn her Watcher to keep her away from, well, you know where. They're going to be waiting for her."

"I'll do what I can, Jo."

"Thanks."

After they left the church, Blair lit into Jo. "You didn't tell me any of that, that somebody had to die for you to become what you are. And you died, Jo. You're not going back to that."

Jo concentrated on walking. It was something simple, something she could use to distance herself from Blair's emotions. "It doesn't work like that, Blair. And it's kinda a moot point for now."

"You can do whatever you want. You can get your education."

"It's not a choice, Blair. It's what I am. It's part of every cell. And I'll be able to do it again."

"You can't do it forever, Jo."

"I can't do what you want me to do now, either. I can't even read the damn paper."

"You're doing better."

"Oh, yeah, it's a great day when I don't fall down on the floor and flop like a fish."

"That's not." Blair stopped. If she let Jo pull her into this argument, she would never make her point. "All I'm saying is you need to think about the future. You need to consider that you may never be able to go back to that."

"All the future I see right now is babysitters and a million pills."

"Then think about next week. Thanksgiving in New York. We'll see your mom. We'll watch the parade. We'll wander through the Met. Other than Thursday, the apartment won't be crowded. There won't be any nurses."

"Ma'll be worse than all the nurses put together," Jo grumbled.

Blair could tell Jo's mood was lighter. "She'll be thrilled to see you. And you'll meet my parents."

"There's easier ways to torture me, you know."

"I know," Blair smiled. "I'm saving them for later."

* * *

><p>Jo sat at Blair's desk, a blank sheet of paper in front of her. The envelope was addressed and stamped. She just needed to decide what to say. There was a lot, but too much was as bad as not enough. <em>Yo, B, sorry I didn't stick around. It wasn't anything about you, just my stuff. I was wrong about you and wrong about Angel, but you know that. There's a lot of things I should have told you guys, but I was really messed up. The thing I need to tell you now is that if you ever need my help, I'll be there. I owe you big time, and I always pay my debts. So if the time ever comes that you need a hand, call this number and ask for Jo.<em>

Jo read it, and read it again, then folded the sheet of paper, wrote Buffy's name on it, and put it in the envelope before she changed her mind. She got a second sheet, and sighed deeply before starting. _It wasn't about you, Willow, or anything you did or said. I told you, I hated that place. And it's not like I was needed or anything, since B was there and had you guys backing her up. Anyway, keep your chin up. There's somebody out there for you. I'm sorry it couldn't be me. And tell Xan hey so he doesn't feel left out._ She quickly folded that sheet and scrawled Willow's name on it before stuffing it in the envelope.

Jo got up from the desk and told today's sitter – she never bothered to learn their names, a defense against admitting they would be there long enough for her to know them – "I'm goin' to the mailbox."

The nurse got her coat and followed.


	12. Chapter 6B

There were no classes on Wednesday, so after breakfast, Blair packed for their trip. She knew Jo's bag held mostly jeans and t-shirts. Blair packed her clothes, and included what Jo would need to wear. Her mother expected everyone to be appropriately attired for dinner, and her father had Saturday night reservations at some new restaurant. Her father, especially, wanted to meet the person his daughter insisted on searching for for more than a year. Her mother said nothing about either Jo's presence or Blair's request that her mother's driver venture to the Bronx to pick up Rose Polniaczek. Rose threw a tiny fit at Blair's insistence at providing transportation, but ultimately gave in.

Blair double-checked Jo's medications, making certain that she had all of the pill bottles and that none of them needed to be refilled. As she finished with each bag, she left it on the bed, and when she finished, she called Jo into the bedroom.

Jo looked at the bed and sighed. "How many times are you going to change your clothes?"

"As many as you are," Blair smiled. She picked up the smallest bag and left the room. She waited for Jo to join her near the door. Blair had their coats over her arm, her purse over her shoulder and her keys in her hand. When Jo approached, Blair opened the door so Jo could pass.

The ride to New York took a little longer than usual because of traffic. They talked most of the way, but they were both glad when Blair pulled into the underground garage at her mother's building. They gathered the bags and went up. Blair wasn't surprised when the maid told her that her mother was out, and wouldn't be back until sometime that evening.

Jo carried the bags back to the bedroom and dropped them on the bed. Blair came in a few moments later and began to unpack. It didn't take long, and when she finished, Blair checked the time. She rummaged through one of the two makeup kits on the dresser and brought out two bottles of pills.

Jo looked at them unhappily but held out her hand. Blair handed her the bottles, and Jo took two capsules from one bottle and a small white pill from the other. She put the bottles back into the bag. "I need to eat something."

"I know. I asked Mary to make a snack for you."

"What kinda snack?"

"Let's go see."

The snack turned out to be a small shepherd's pie. Blair was glad she'd warned Mary how much Jo could eat, and Mary was happy to see someone enjoy her work. Jo complimented her several times and thanked her twice, and then again when she told them that dinner would be served at 7 p.m., four hours away.

They went into the huge living room. Jo stood at the balcony doors. Blair joined her. "Wanna go out or what?"

"We can go out. You got someplace in mind?"

"No." Blair pulled Jo toward the door. She stopped at the closet to get their coats and her bag.

On the street, Jo held Blair's hand, but let Blair lead their walk. They walked toward Central Park and found an empty bench. They sat and watched the people go by for a while, until Jo abruptly stood up. "We need to head back."

"What's wrong?"

"It's gettin' dark." Jo rubbed the back of her neck with her free hand.

Blair didn't say anything. She stood up and they began the walk back. Jo was anxious and tense the entire time. She kept them in the middle of the sidewalk, away from the alleys that were all ready too dim to see down. She knew vampires were beginning to move around. The shadows of the tall buildings made it safe for them much earlier in the day.

She wanted to take Blair to the penthouse and leave her there, but Jo knew she couldn't do that. She enumerated to herself the list of reasons, and by the time they were safely inside, Jo resigned herself to remaining a bystander for a while longer.

They put their coats in the closet and Jo pulled Blair back to her bedroom and closed the door. She kissed Blair soundly, seeking an outlet for the anticipation of the fight she couldn't have.

Blair laughed softly. "Not that I mind, but what brought this on?"

"I can't just kiss you because you're my beautiful girlfriend?"

"You can kiss me any time, for any reason."

"Good." Jo nuzzled beneath Blair's ear. "I like kissing you."

"I like you kissing me." Blair shifted, bringing their bodies into closer contact. She missed this. Since coming home from the hospital, Jo didn't seem interested in any physical contact, and Blair wanted, needed, that with Jo.

Jo was careful. She knew she could move Blair back a few steps and stretch her out on the bed, but she still wasn't ready for that emotionally. Physically, she wanted Blair, and wondered several times after a long night of slaying why she didn't permit Blair that additional intimacy. It took all of her self-control those nights to will herself to sleep after Blair fastened herself to Jo, reaching sleepily under Jo's shirt to touch her skin. "We need to stop," Jo murmured.

Blair pulled her head back and looked at Jo. "You all right?"

Jo nodded.

"Did I do something wrong?"

"Hell, no."

"So why are we stopping?"

"Dinner. And your mother. I don't think she'll appreciate meeting me in her daughter's bed."

Blair looked over her shoulder at the clock and sighed. Dinner would be ready in just a few minutes, and they needed to be at the table when it was. She kissed Jo one more time before pushing her back a step.

As soon as dinner was on the table, Blair told Mary to head home. She knew the woman would be back early the next day, and she and Jo could take care of the dishes. They ate and cleaned up and went back to Blair's room to watch television. At 9 p.m., when Jo took her final round of daily pills, Blair's mother still hadn't returned. An hour later, they went to bed.

They woke early, and by 8 a.m., were casually dressed and having a breakfast of coffee and pastry in the kitchen. People would begin arriving shortly after 9, including Jo's mother. While they were having their second cups of coffee, Monica Warner entered the kitchen. She greeted Blair warmly and turned a critical eye on Jo while Blair made introductions.

"Nice to meet you," Jo said, hoping her nervousness didn't show.

"Nice to meet you," Monica echoed. She wondered whether Blair meant what it seemed. She hadn't brought anyone to any family event before, and it never occurred to Monica that Blair might be a lesbian. "I understand your mother will be joining us?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"You attend college with Blair?"

"No, ma'am."

"Please stop calling me ma'am. Monica is fine. What do you do?"

"Right now, I'm gettin' over"

"An accident," Blair finished for her.

"I'm sorry to hear that."

Jo nodded. The doorbell rang, and Monica excused herself. Jo looked at Blair. "I don't think she likes me."

"Don't be silly. She doesn't like your clothes, but you'll change when we get back."

"Get back?"

"I thought you'd want to go out for a while."

"But Ma's coming."

"We'll visit for a while, and we won't be gone too long."

Blair was right. There were too many people in the apartment. Not that it was crowded, by any means, but it was difficult for Jo to keep track of any conversation, and too busy for her to have a proper visit with her mother. When Blair excused them from one of her mother's friends and pulled her toward the closet, Jo was relieved. They took their jackets and left the building. They wormed their way to the street, so they could see the parade. Blair stepped down off the curb, and Jo stood behind her, her arms around Blair and her chin on Blair's shoulder.

The parade was definitely more fun this way, Blair decided. They saw the band performances and the detail on the floats, and craned their necks to see the balloons. Around them, people laughed and cheered, and they applauded for each group that passed them.

Blair didn't really want to leave, but knew they had to go back and change before the meal was served. She turned her head, and Jo kissed her, and Blair decided they could stay a while longer. When the kiss ended, Blair said, "We need to go soon."

"Ok."

"Having fun?"

"Yeah. This was a good idea."

Blair smiled and turned back to the parade. They watched one more band and two more floats before Blair turned back to Jo.

"Now?" Jo asked.

Blair nodded, and they began to work their way out of the crowd. They slipped into the apartment and hurried back to Blair's room. Jo changed into the clothes Blair put out for her and brushed her hair while Blair changed and put on her makeup. Then they returned to the party, where Jo saw Monica talking with her mother. "That can't be good," she told Blair.

Blair laughed. "All they can do is trade baby stories."

"Don't say I didn't warn you," Jo said.

Jo was starved by the time dinner was served at 2 p.m. The dining room table, huge when she and Blair ate there the night before, had doubled in size. She was seated between two strangers, when she wanted to be between Blair and her mother. Neither of them seemed too perturbed by the seating arrangements, so Jo answered when her neighbors asked questions, but didn't do anything to further conversation.

She ate more than both of them combined, but was careful to mind her manners. She didn't want to spill anything on the silk blouse or the dress pants Blair picked out for her. Jo wasn't comfortable in them, but her mother looked thrilled at her appearance, and Blair, seemingly deep in conversation with a handsome young man, winked at her. Even Monica seemed pleased.

When the meal was finished, the guests returned to the living room. Jo's mother was still conversing with her seatmate, and Jo decided to leave her to it. She would ride home with her mother, maybe stay and visit for a while. Jo went to Blair's side, and when Blair reached out, automatically took her hand and let Blair draw her closer. She smugly noted the look of surprise on the man's face, but stayed out of the conversation.

As the afternoon went on, people began to leave. By sunset, only Jo and Blair and their mothers remained. The staff left as soon as the meal was cleared away.

"I'm gonna change," Jo told Blair.

"I think I will, too," Blair said, and went with her.

They changed back into the clothes they wore to the parade, and Jo took her pills before they went back to the living room, where their mothers were laughing together on one of the sofas. Jo and Blair sat on the other sofa and waited.

"Jo, what's the doctor say?"

"I'll tell you later, Ma."

"Everyone but the neurologist has discharged her, Mrs. Polniaczek, and she's optimistic that Jo will recover completely."

"Blair!"

"What, Jo? It's not a secret." Blair squeezed her hand. "Jo hasn't had a major seizure since Saturday."

"You're gonna give me one," Jo muttered.

"Be nice," her mother cautioned.

"What happened?" Monica asked.

"I got jumped by a buncha goons."

"Did the police find who did it?"

"No."

"That's terrible," Monica said.

Jo shrugged. "Coulda been worse."

"I don't think so," Blair said, remembering the conversation with Father Mike.

"How are your classes?"

"Good. I'm especially enjoying art history. It's fascinating to learn about the outside influences on stylistic changes, especially since world history is staying on about the same pace."

"And your social life?"

"I'm concentrating on school, Mother."

"There's more to college than classes, Blair."

"I know, and once I feel secure academically, I'll pursue other interests."

"Monica," Rose said, "thank you so much for having me here today. I had a wonderful time."

"You're welcome. It was lovely to meet you. I'll have Henry take you home." Monica got up and went to call him.

"I'll ride with you, Ma."

"I'm coming, too," Blair said, and the three of them went to get their coats.

Monica met them at the door. "He'll be waiting at the entrance. Blair, where are you going?"

"I'm going to ride with them, Mother. We'll be back soon."

Monica frowned slightly, but said nothing.

* * *

><p>On the ride back to the Bronx, the girls talked about the parade. They offered to come in and stay, but Rose declined. "Go have fun," she told them, and hugged both of them tightly. Jo stayed standing outside the limousine until she saw her mother's apartment lights come on and Rose come to the window to wave.<p>

When Jo got back in the car, she found the privacy screen raised. Blair smiled and patted the seat beside her. Jo moved closer, wondering what Blair had in mind.

"How do you feel?"

"Ok."

"It's been a long day."

"Yeah."

"It was good to see your mother."

"She was glad to see you."

"She was far happier to see you. She's been worried sick."

"Why? I told her I was all right. Heck, you told her I was all right."

"She worries just like I do."

"Nothing to worry about now."

"You'd be surprised."

"Says the fight magnet."

Blair laughed. "Are you going shopping with me tomorrow?"

"No," Jo said definitively, remembering her last shopping expedition with Blair.

"What will you do?"

"I can amuse myself for a few hours. And it's your thing with your mom."

"You hardly saw your mother today."

"I'm gonna go to mass Sunday, take her to breakfast after."

"That's a lovely idea."

"Yeah, I have 'em occasionally."

"I have one now."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Blair answered, and kissed her.

They necked until the driver rapped on the window to get their attention, and took a minute after that to stop giggling before they got out of the limo. When they went back upstairs, Monica was nowhere to be found, so they went to Blair's bedroom, put on pajamas, and settled on the bed to watch television.

Jo fell asleep soon after her last round of pills, but Blair stayed awake to watch the news. Jo slept restlessly, even after Blair settled beside her. She woke several times during the night, and twice woke Blair with her thrashing.

* * *

><p>In the morning, they had breakfast together. Blair kept watching Jo. She was concerned that Jo might have a major seizure. All the symptoms Blair learned to watch for were present, including the irritability of Jo's response when Blair suggested they move to the living room. Before they could, Jo said, "Ah, shit," and convulsed.<p>

She fell from the chair to the floor, and hit her head on the tile with a loud thump that was almost buried in the sound of the chair landing opposite her. Blair left her chair and fell to her knees by Jo's head. She swept the broken bits of Jo's coffee mug under the table, where Jo couldn't roll onto them, before she noticed the growing puddle of blood.

Blair didn't panic. She stayed where she was until the seizure passed, then got up and pulled a handful of dishtowels from the drawer. She turned Jo's head, looking for the source of the blood, and when she found it, pressed a folded towel against it and waited for Jo to regain consciousness.

Jo opened her eyes to see Blair's face. She tried to say something, but couldn't manage.

"It's all right," Blair said gently, and kissed her forehead.

Jo tried again. "Blue truck."

"What?"

"She book said," and looked confused.

"I'm going to call an ambulance. Stay right here."

"Zoom!" was what came out, and Jo thought, 'What the fuck?'

Blair was gone for two minutes. During that time, Jo managed to sit up, leaning back on her hands. "They're on the way. I thought I told you to stay down," she scolded gently, and took another dishtowel from the pile on the floor. She pressed it against the back of Jo's head, where blood continued to seep.

Building security accompanied the EMTs to the penthouse. "In the kitchen," Blair called when she heard the door open.

Blair explained what happened, and was answering questions when Monica entered the kitchen. "Blair, what's going on?"

"Jo had a seizure. I'm taking her to the hospital."

"Loud," Jo said firmly.

"I know you don't want to go," Blair answered. "It's just a precaution."

Blair rode in the ambulance and stayed with Jo. She gave the ER physician the contact information for Jo's neurologist, and while they waited for her return call, he shaved a small section on the back of her head and stitched closed the spot where she hit the floor.

An hour after that, Jo was asleep on her side, one hand clutching Blair's. Blair sat beside her on the bed, waiting for something, anything to happen. Jo would sleep for three or four hours, and Blair hoped that when she woke, Jo's language skills would be back to normal.

Two hours into her sleep, the ER doctor came back. He ordered a CT scan of Jo's head, to determine whether there was any change from the films her neurologist faxed. Jo slept through it, and was still asleep when he came back to tell Blair that there was no new damage, and that they had an appointment first thing Monday morning with Jo's doctor. He handed over the envelope of CT scans, and told Blair to snag a nurse when Jo woke so she could be discharged.

Jo slept another hour after that, and woke slowly. "Blair?"

"I'm right here, Jo."

"Where are we?"

"We're at the hospital, but not for much longer." Blair raised Jo's hand and kissed her knuckles. "Stay right here and I'll get somebody to let us go."

Staying still wasn't a problem. Any movement set off waves of pain through Jo's head, so she closed her eyes and waited. When Blair came back, she helped Jo to a sitting position. Jo tried to pay attention to what the nurse said, but soon gave up. When the clipboard was handed to her, she struggled to hold it and sloppily signed her name on three different pages. Blair took the papers, and she and the nurse helped Jo down from the bed.

Jo wavered for a few seconds. "Bad idea," she said, and broke into a cold sweat.

"Do you need to sit down?"

"Yeah," Jo said, fighting what her body was trying to do.

"Are you going to?"

"Uh huh."

Blair lowered them to the floor and put Jo's head in her lap. "Try to relax. It will be over soon."

Jo convulsed again, her body initially rigid before her limbs flailed. Blair made certain she didn't hit her head again. By the time another nurse arrived to help, the seizure was over. The nurses put Jo back on the bed, and the doctor returned. "I'm going to admit her," he told Blair, who nodded. She stayed out of the way while the nurse set up an IV, and after she left, returned to her spot on the bed beside Jo. She held Jo's hand, stroking the fingers twined with her own.

Jo slept even longer this time, but her limbs twitched and jerked despite the sedation. After two hours, Jo was moved to a private room. Blair called her mother and left a message with the maid, and Jo's mother, where the phone rang unanswered, and decided that Rose was getting an answering machine for Christmas. Then she returned to her spot beside Jo on the bed, waiting for her come back.

"Thought we were goin' home," Jo croaked early in the evening.

"That was before you gave a command performance."

"How bad?"

"I don't know." Blair touched Jo's face gently.

"Can't we just go now?"

"I don't think so."

Jo pushed herself up and wrapped her free arm around Blair. "I hate hospitals."

"Me, too."

"If I can stand up, will you let me sign myself outta here?"

Blair thought about it.

"C'mon, you know they won't do anything except try to make me sleep," Jo said. "And I can do that a lot better anywhere but in here."

"Sit up for a while first."

"Ok." Jo didn't let go of Blair. "I'm sorry I ruined your day."

"I can go shopping with Mother any time."

"I'm still sorry."

"Don't be." Blair kissed Jo's temple, and they stayed still for several more minutes.

"I'm ready," Jo said.

Blair reluctantly let her go and stood up so Jo could swing her legs out of bed. Once Jo was upright, Blair stepped forward, and Jo pulled her close again. Blair thought Jo had gone back to sleep and was about to move her back into bed when Jo said, "Let's see what happens."

Blair took half a step back, and Jo slid to the floor. She swayed at first, but Blair kept her steady. Jo, familiar with being dizzy, disoriented, and nauseated, cataloged those symptoms and decided that on a scale of one to ten, her headache was a seven. She'd had worse, ones that kept her horizontal in a dark room while she counted the minutes until she could take another pain pill. This was the kind that, if she moved slowly, she probably wouldn't vomit. "You can let go," she told Blair.

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

Blair let go and moved back a little more. Jo looked at the floor and slowly lifted her head until she looked Blair in the eye. "I'm good."

Blair nodded and moved to the head of the bed. She rolled the IV stand close to Jo. "Use the bathroom and we'll go from there."

"Deal."

Blair stayed close, but Jo, while slow, didn't appear to need help. After using the toilet and washing her hands, she went back into the room and sat in the chair closest to the bed and looked up at Blair. "Can we go?"

"I'll get the nurse."

"Thank you."

There was a small argument, and the nurse went so far as to call the admitting doctor up from the emergency room, but Jo was adamant that she wanted to leave. In the end, they had to let her go, and this set of papers had "against medical advice" and "AMA" all over them.

Blair called Henry while they waited for the papers to be prepared, and the limo waited at the hospital entrance when they got down there. Jo kept her eyes closed during the ride, knowing from experience that watching the motion would make her feel worse.

Blair stayed beside Jo while she made her way to the bedroom. She helped Jo change into sleep clothes, got the pills Jo needed, and settled her in bed. She kissed Jo's forehead. "I'm going to grab something to eat and I'll be right back," she promised.

"Take your time. I'll be asleep."

Two plates of food, one with much more than the other, waited in the refrigerator, and Blair smiled. She took the lighter one and put it in the microwave. While it heated, she got a bottle of Perrier and poured it into a glass. She headed back to her bedroom, but was intercepted by her mother.

"How's your friend?"

"She'll be all right."

"Come sit with me."

Blair followed her mother to the living room. She put the plate on the coffee table and sat on the floor.

"Is there something going on with you two?"

"Other than I'm completely in love with her, no." Blair took another forkful of leftovers.

"I expected that," Monica said, "since you never brought any of your suitors home."

"I wanted her to meet you and Daddy."

"What if we don't approve? What if we forbid you to see her?"

Blair put down her fork and looked at her mother. "Why would you do that?"

"You're too young to know your mind."

"Mother, you're being ridiculous."

"How do you know she's not after your money?"

"Oh, please," Blair snorted. "She throws a fit every time I buy something for her. She's not interested in money."

"You don't know this girl at all."

"Mother, I've known her for more than three years."

"You spent more than one of them looking for her."

"Yes, I did," Blair agreed.

"I'm not going to change your mind about this, am I?"

"No." Blair started eating again.

"You know I'm going to have to tell your father."

"I'm going to tell him tomorrow night at dinner."

Monica sighed and remained silent for a few minutes. Blair continued to eat, unconcerned. Monica asked, "Tell me about her."

"Tell me what you think," Blair countered.

"She has horrible fashion sense, although her manners are adequate and her mother is nice."

"The jeans, right?"

"If you can call them that."

"She likes them. And she changed for dinner, if you'll recall."

"That was acceptable."

"I thought so," Blair smiled.

"What happened this morning?"

"She had a seizure and hit her head on the floor."

"Does this happen often?"

"Much less than it used to. At first, she had seizures every day."

"What do the doctors say?"

"It takes time for the brain to heal from severe trauma. She's doing amazingly well."

"I suppose you're paying her medical bills."

"Yes. Will you please stop bringing money into this? It's not coming from the trust, and it's not my allowance. The money I spend on Jo, I earn from my investments. That's my money, and I'll spend it as I please."

"When she's healthy, what then?"

"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Is the interrogation over?"

"This is hardly an interrogation."

"I need to check on Jo." Blair stood up. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

Blair went to her room. Jo was on her side, back to the door, deeply asleep. Blair watched her and calmed herself. The conversation with her mother, combined with her worry about Jo, left Blair on edge. She walked to the bed, adjusted the covers, and kissed Jo's temple.

When she returned to the living room, a glass of wine sat beside her half-finished plate, and her mother was holding one. "How is she?" Monica asked.

"Sleeping." Blair returned to her place on the floor.

"Is that good?"

"That's excellent. I'm sorry I snapped at you earlier."

"I suppose I deserved it. You're probably going to snap again, but are you sure this isn't just a phase?"

"I'm quite certain, Mother."

"So I'll ask you again to tell me about her."

Blair ate while she composed her thoughts. "She's smart, and she's really good at the things I'm not. We have fun. I had more fun going down to watch the parade from the street with her yesterday than I ever had seeing it from the balcony."

"She makes you happy," Monica stated.

"Very." Blair finished her dinner and got up on the sofa. She turned and tucked one leg under so she could look at her mother.

"I suppose you have plans for the rest of the weekend."

"If she feels up to it, we're going to the art museum. We're having dinner with Daddy tomorrow night. She's going to meet her mother Sunday morning. I think I'll go with her."

"Henry will drive you," Monica said.

"Thank you. We'll probably take a cab back."

"Don't be silly. He can wait."

"Not in that neighborhood. I don't know who would worry more, Henry or Jo."

"Why would they? Never mind. Will you be back before Christmas?"

"I don't know. Finals aren't over until the week before. We'll definitely be here for your party."

"Dressed appropriately."

"Of course."

They talked for another hour before Blair excused herself. She took her plate and glasses to the kitchen and went back to bed. She wasn't really sleepy, but wanted to keep an eye on Jo, and had enough gossip for one day.

Blair put her pajamas on and got into bed. She turned on the television and left the volume low. Jo slept unmoving, completely still except for the steady rise and fall of her chest. Blair kept on hand on her shoulder. She was terrified when Jo looked at her and spoke complete nonsense. Although she understood what Jo meant, Blair could see her confusion and frustration, and she worried that it might be permanent. Her relief when Jo said her name was nearly physical.

After two circuits through the channels, Blair turned off the television and her bedside lamp. She slid down into the bed and moved Jo's head onto her chest. Jo reacted sluggishly, but before Blair fell asleep, Jo was half on top of her.

She was still there when Blair woke. Jo woke up not long after.

"How do you feel?" Blair asked.

"I'll get back to you," Jo answered quietly.

"How about we get something to eat and see about getting the blood out of your hair."

"Man, I bet my shirt's ruined."

"It's just a shirt."

"Yeah, that's what it said on the label. Just a shirt."

"Oh, now I know you're feeling better. C'mon, breakfast and a shower will make you feel like a new woman."

"I'm not done with you."

Blair laughed and pushed Jo away. She got out of bed and put on her robe, and went to the bathroom. When she returned, Jo was sitting on the bed. Blair got her robe and held it open for her. Jo was still moving slowly, and Blair mentally added aspirin to the morning pill pile. While Jo went to the bathroom, Blair got her pills together and went to the kitchen. She started the coffee maker and wondered about breakfast.

"Any pie left?" Jo asked.

"Pie for breakfast?"

"It's apple."

"What the heck," Blair decided, and got the pie from the refrigerator. Jo got plates and forks while Blair cut two slices. After they finished eating and cleaning up, they went back to the bedroom.

"I'll help you with the shower," Blair offered.

"Not that I wouldn't love that, but I can manage."

"You need help."

"I need to do this by myself.

"Jo, don't be obstinate."

Jo went to her. "I don't want the first time we're naked together in the shower to be because I'm hurt."

Blair kissed her. "It won't be the first time," she reminded Jo.

"That was a bath, and I was the only one naked."

"Only because you were hurt."

"My point exactly."

"Go on, then."

Twelve minutes later, Jo was back in the bedroom, a towel over her head and pajamas in hand. "Your turn."

Blair took a little longer, and after half an hour, joined Jo in the living room. "You feel like going to the museum?"

"Yeah." Jo reached in her jeans and pulled out two pill bottles. "I'm all packed."

They held hands during the leisurely walk to the museum, and continued as they went through the galleries. Most of the older artwork would have bored Jo, but Blair's commentary made the work interesting. They took a lunch break and returned to the galleries. A little after 4 p.m., they left the museum and returned to the penthouse to get ready for dinner.

Blair again selected Jo's outfit, and left Jo to get dressed while she went into the bathroom to do her hair and makeup. When Blair came out, Jo was pacing. "You look great," Blair reassured her.

"It's your dad."

"Mother is much worse." Blair disappeared into the walk-in closet and came out a few minutes later in a dress, holding a pair of heels. "Zip me up." Jo kissed between her shoulder blades and Blair shivered while Jo raised the zipper. Blair sat on the bed and put on her shoes, then stood up. "You ready?" Blair asked.

"I guess."

The doorman hailed a cab for them, and they went first to her father's apartment. Blair's father hugged her, and accepted the hand Jo offered. He looked Jo up and down, then looked at his daughter, and Blair introduced them.

"I'm glad you came back," David Warner told Jo.

She looked at Blair and smiled. "So am I."

They went in and sat in front of another great view of the city. Blair and her father talked, while Jo mostly looked out the window. Jo didn't realize that she had zoned out completely until Blair finally got her attention, and Jo twitched.

"Are you all right?" Blair asked softly, ignoring her father's questioning look.

"I think so."

"If you're not, we can do this another time."

"Tell you what, you go on and I'll head back."

"No, you're not going anywhere alone."

"Then I guess we're goin' to dinner."

Blair stood up and turned to her father. "Daddy, would you please give us a minute?"

"Of course." David Warner left the room.

Blair leaned over Jo. "Tell me the truth, Jo. Do you feel all right?"

Jo hesitated. "No," she said finally. "I feel kinda spacey."

"Do you think you're going to have another seizure?"

"I think I just did. One of those, you know, it's French."

"Petit mal."

"Yeah."

"Do you want to go to dinner?"

Jo hesitated again. "Honestly?"

"Yes, honestly."

"No, all I wanna do is go back to bed."

"Then that's what we'll do."

"Blair, you haven't seen your dad in months," Jo protested.

Blair stood up. "Daddy," she called.

"Yes, sweetheart."

"Jo's not feeling well. Can we pick up something to take back to Mother's and continue our visit there?"

"Certainly. I'll call the restaurant," he said, and left them again.

"See? No big deal."

Jo nodded.

"I'll be right back."

Blair went to her father's den and waited until he finished his call. "I'm sorry about this, Daddy. We'll go another time."

"If your friend isn't feeling well," he began.

"Jo's more than my friend, Daddy."

"I know, Princess. I was waiting for you to tell me. What's wrong? It's not nerves, is it?"

"If you know how I feel about her, then you know what's going on."

"I do. I'd rather you tell me, though."

"Only if you promise to stop spying on us."

"I'm not spying, Blair. I'm staying informed."

"I'll let you know what's going on," she promised.

"Your mother called me."

Blair rolled her eyes. "Let me guess, she wanted to complain about me spending money on Jo."

"Among other things. She's concerned. So am I."

"Daddy, I love her. She loves me because I'm me, not because I'm rich or have the right connections or because I can do things for her."

"I'm happy to hear that. You still haven't told me what's wrong with her."

"Jo was attacked last month. She was in a coma, which you all ready know. And I'm sure Mother told you she had a seizure yesterday morning. She had another at the hospital. And she wasn't being rude earlier. She had a small seizure."

"A small one."

"No blood, no drool, no thrashing," Jo said from the hallway. "I'm lookin' for the bathroom."

"Second door on the left," Blair told her.

Jo nodded and walked away.

"I like her," David said.

"Good."

"We can leave whenever you're ready."

"Thank you, Daddy." Blair darted forward and tiptoed to kiss his cheek, then went to wait in the hallway for Jo.

When the door opened, Blair looked critically at Jo. "How bad's your headache?"

"I've had worse."

"That's not an answer."

"Did I tell you how beautiful you look tonight?"

"Jo," Blair said, exasperated.

"Blair, I all ready ruined dinner with your dad."

"You didn't ruin anything. Can you ride in the car or do you need a few minutes yet?"

"I think I need to sit until the pills kick in."

Blair put her arm around Jo. "Daddy's still in the den."

They went down the hall and into the den, and sat on the couch, Blair's arm still around Jo.

"Sorry you're not feeling well."

"I'm sorry I spoiled your plans," Jo answered.

He waved it off. "We'll see each other again."

Blair took over the conversation. "We went to the art museum today, Daddy. You'll be happy to know that's one place where I was able to put my education to good use."

"And you just finished your first semester. Talk about bang for the buck," he smiled.

Jo laid her head against the back of the sofa and put her hand on Blair's thigh. Blair covered it with her other hand and continued the conversation.

After 20 minutes, Jo sat up. "I think I'm ready," she said during a lull in the conversation.

David stood up. "The driver's waiting for us."


	13. Chapter 7A

No matter how the wind may blow  
>You belong to me<br>Like the mountains to the sky  
>And you know when I close my eyes<br>You're the one I see  
><em>Karla with a K<em>

On Sunday, Jo slept until 10 a.m. Blair lay awake and watched her for an hour. The weekend hadn't gone exactly to plan, but things worked out. The seizures on Friday concerned her, especially the first one, and she couldn't remember seeing Jo have one of the others before.

What worried her most was that Jo remained convinced she would return to slaying vampires, and her unwillingness to consider anything else. Blair still hoped to convince Jo to at least take the GED exams. She had no doubt Jo would pass the tests; the time she spent reading in public libraries across the country left her with a broader knowledge base than many people Blair knew. Although Jo was satisfied with her informal education, Blair wanted Jo to have options in the future, even if she never had to exercise them.

With Jo sleeping so late, they wouldn't have time to visit her mother again. The drive back to Wellesley wasn't overly long, but as it was, it would late afternoon before they got home.

"What'cha thinkin' so hard about?"

"Going home." Blair smiled, and leaned over to kiss Jo. "You slept well."

"What time's it?"

"Almost 10."

"Shit."

"Your mom will understand. And you'll talk to her tonight."

"Yeah, I know. Anything we need to do before we head out?"

"Dress and pack."

"Guess we better get to it, huh?"

"Guess so," Blair agreed, and kissed Jo once more. "I keep expecting Mother to come through the door."

"Oh, yeah, that'll go well."

"Is that the voice of experience?"

"Unfortunately, yes. Another bit of my deep, dark past that I'm not sharing. And don't ask Ma about it, either, cause she doesn't know."

"So it was your girlfriend's mother."

"Crazy hag," Jo muttered, remembering the screeching that went on the entire time she tried to pull on clothes while ducking anything the girl's mother threw. She'd had to leave by the fire escape without her bra, panties, or socks, and with a knot on her head from a ceramic frog.

"How old were you?"

"I'm taking the Fifth." Jo rolled away from Blair and sat on the edge of the bed. She waited a few seconds before standing to make certain it wouldn't be a problem, then headed for the bathroom.

Dr. Hudson put the CT films up on the light box and looked at them closely.

"What happened, exactly?"

"I fell outta the chair and cracked my head on the floor," Jo said.

Dr. Hudson looked at Blair.

"The last seizure before this one was Saturday afternoon, and it wasn't too bad," Blair said. "Jo didn't sleep well Thursday night, and I thought while we were having breakfast that she might be building up to another one. There wasn't really any warning. When Jo fell out of the chair, she hit her head on the tile floor. They put some stitches in."

"You can take 'em out," Jo said.

"When the seizure was over, Jo tried to talk, but what came out was nonsense. The inflection was appropriate, but the words were completely random. She was awake for an hour or so afterward, but she slept for about three and half hours. When we were getting ready to leave the hospital, she had another seizure. It didn't last nearly as long, but she slept for hours afterward."

"Let me guess. She sweet talked you into letting her leave."

"Hey!" Jo said defensively.

"Yes," Blair answered.

"Anything else happen?"

"We think she had a petit mal seizure Saturday night."

"Oh?"

"She was just completely out of it. I don't know for how long before I noticed, and it took several attempts to get her attention."

"Afterward?"

"Jo said she felt spacey, so I took her home and put her to bed."

Dr. Hudson looked at Jo. "Define spacey."

"Not quite with it, had some trouble following conversation."

"Headache?"

"Oh, yeah."

"Please tell me you didn't just tough it out."

"Nah. I took the goofballs and went to bed."

"I don't see anything to worry about on the films. Let me see the stitches."

Jo lay on her side on the exam table. Blair moved her hair out of the way.

"I'll take them out," Dr. Hudson decided, and got what she needed from the cabinets in the room. She put on rubber gloves, snipped the knots, and pulled each bit of thread from Jo's scalp. "All done," she said cheerfully, and put the tray holding everything on the counter.

Jo sat up again, and she and Blair waited.

"I think what happened," Dr. Hudson said, "is that when you hit the floor during the seizure, you scrambled everything. That probably caused the second seizure, too. I don't see any evidence of a clot or any new damage, so I'm guessing that once you got enough sleep, your brain reset itself. I don't think we have to worry unless you start having trouble with your words or unless the number or duration of seizures increases. The petit mal seizure on Saturday is a good sign. It means things are closer to normal, that your brain is learning to work around things. Any questions?"

"How much longer do I have to put up with this?" Jo asked.

"I don't know. You heal quickly. Most people who had the amount of trauma you had are still in the hospital. It takes as long as it takes, and you can't hurry things. You can, however, slow them down, so quit bouncing your head on the floor."

"No sympathy," Jo muttered.

Dr. Hudson smiled. "You know where to find sympathy in the dictionary, Ms. Polniaczek."

"Nowhere near your picture, Doc."

"See you in a month, unless things go haywire before then."

Jo met Blair at the library on Wednesday night. Amy was all ready waiting when she arrived. "Hey."

"Hey yourself."

"Anything new?"

"Nope. How was New York?"

Jo shrugged. "Parade was fun. Saw my mom for a while."

"Didja meet her parents?"

"They think I'm pond scum."

"They think no such thing." Blair kissed Jo's cheek. Jo took the books Blair carried.

As the group walked the quad, Jo felt the familiar tingle of her early warning system. She knew Amy felt something, too, because she hurried the group along. Once the last two girls were safely in their dorm, Amy turned to Jo. "Your call, Slayer."

"How many?"

"Two, I think."

"Can you take them?"

"Not alone."

"What do you think you're doing?" Blair demanded incredulously.

"Oh, it's so much better for them to follow us home so they can lay in wait to ambush us later," Jo answered sarcastically, and pushed Blair toward the dorm. "Go to Debbie's room and wait. I'll come up and get you."

"Jo," Blair began.'

"Just do it," Jo growled. "You can yell at me later."

"Don't think I won't," Blair answered indignantly, but went inside.

Jo tossed her books onto the steps and pulled a stake from her jacket. Amy had one in her hand. "It always weirds me out to see you with that."

"I have nightmares about tripping and falling onto it."

They moved away from the light. "All right," Jo said, "I suggest you come out, cause if I have to chase you down, you're gonna get a beatin' before I stake you."

Jo heard footsteps coming from behind them, and they both turned in time to see three burly male vampires charging them. Jo and Amy stepped out of the way, and Jo put out her foot and tripped one. She immediately jumped on his back and staked him.

The other two were more wary on the return trip, but they were obviously used to overpowering victims with size and intimidation. The two females moved around them, easily dodging blows. Amy took advantage of her smaller stature to duck in and stake her opponent. She jumped on the back of Jo's attacker and covered his eyes. Jo took advantage of his confusion to stake him, and helped Amy to her feet. "Good job," Jo said.

"You're a little rusty."

"Gettin' your head beat in will do that."

"When are you gonna get back into it?"

"Not until the doc springs me. You saw Blair. She's gonna tear me a new one."

"We better go get her."

"I don't need a bodyguard."

"Not even from your girlfriend?

Jo didn't answer, and heard Amy laughing as the vampire caught up to her.

Amy picked up Blair's books and sat on the step to wait. Jo went inside and took the stairs up to the second floor. She asked the first girl she saw which room she wanted. Jo knocked on the door and waited.

Blair opened the door, coat and satchel in hand. "Thanks, Deb, I'll see you Friday." She stepped into the hallway and closed the door.

"They didn't touch me," Jo blurted.

"Have you completely lost your mind?"

Jo grabbed Blair's hand and pulled her toward the stairs. "You can ream me out at home."

"I intend to."

The walk home was silent. Amy gave Jo Blair's books when they got outside, and Jo tucked them under her arm. She refused to let go of Blair's hand.

Once everything was put in its place at the apartment, Blair pointed at the sofa. Jo sat down and waited. She was surprised at how near Blair sat.

"I know you miss that," Blair said. "But you can't, not yet. Do you have any idea how scared I was? All I could think was you'd get hit in the face and it would be all over."

"They didn't touch us."

"This time, Jo."

"I'm not goin' to patrol or anything, Blair. But I can't let vampires follow us home. I can't risk anything happenin' to you."

"But you can take risks that frighten me just as much."

"No. It wasn't like that."

"It was exactly like that."

"I didn't do it to upset you."

"I know." Blair took a deep breath and slowly released it. "And I know that no matter what I say, you're going to go back to patrolling as soon as Dr. Hudson releases you." Blair held up her hand to stop Jo from saying anything. "I want you to do something for me, something that tells me you believe that we have a long life together ahead of us."

Jo nodded.

"I want you to get your GED, and I want you to think about college."

"That's it?"

"Yes."

"I'll do it."

"Thank you."

"Is the fight over?" Jo asked cautiously.

"Yes."

"Good." Jo leaned over and kissed her. She realized it was a mistake almost immediately. Not that kissing Blair was a mistake; it had been so long since she'd had a fight that Jo forgot exactly how her body responded.

By the time Jo processed the thought that they should stop, Blair straddled her, and Jo had her hands under Blair's skirt, kneading her buttocks while pulling Blair more firmly against her body.

"Take me to bed, Jo," Blair growled.

Jo groaned and stood up. Her ability to think rationally about what they were doing was gone. She wanted Blair, and Blair wanted her, and Jo didn't care about any of the reasons they hadn't done this before.

Blair stayed wrapped around Jo, kissing her while Jo carried her to the bedroom. She didn't let go, even after Jo laid her on the bed and pressed against her. She wanted this from the moment she turned around to see Jo on the sidewalk at the edge of the college campus. She'd wanted it before that, too, if she was honest, but the passage of time and a few dates who looked like Jo made it clear to Blair that she would wait for this. For her.

She didn't care about torn clothing or marks on her skin or anything except Jo surrounding her. She wasn't surprised by Jo's tenderness and consideration. Those things were always there, even if she was the only one who regularly saw them. What stunned her was Jo's eyes, darker than they normally were, watching her with adoration, reverence, and lust.

While Blair slept, Jo ran her hands over her girlfriend – 'lover,' she corrected herself with a grin. She'd wanted to wait, wanted this to be perfect, with wine and candles and hours alone. Instead, they'd had a fight. Jo recalled the promise she gave Blair. It would make her mother happy, too, if she at least got a GED. College was something else entirely. What could she study that would be of any use?

Willow Rosenberg popped into her mind, as she did randomly. Computers. In the brief time she was in Sunnydale, Red found answers on the computer. Every patrol began in the cemeteries, with a list of that day's funerals, right down to the locations of the graves. Not that fresh graves were hard to miss, but there were so many of them in Sunnydale.

Computers, Jo decided. She hadn't done anything about the piles of electronics at the one lair, and decided to go that afternoon to see what was there. Her eyes went back to Blair, using her for a pillow and mattress, and she smiled. They had something extraordinary together. Blair never gave up on her, even when Jo thought she'd given up on herself.

Jo wondered whether she had time to take the GED tests before Christmas. That would mean more to Blair than anything Jo could buy her. Jo had no idea what Blair would give her for Christmas. She didn't need anything. Once Jo had come out of the coma, she told Blair where her Harley was, and Blair had it moved to the garage. So that just left her mother, and Blair's parents, and Amy.

Her relationship with the vampire made her rethink everything that happened in California. She hadn't received an answer to her letter, not that she ever expected one. But she owed the other Slayer. She hadn't given up on Jo, either, no matter how hateful she'd been to Buffy. What would a vampire want for Christmas?

"Joey, you should be asleep," Blair murmured.

Jo grinned again. Blair could call her that any time. Blair could call her anything, and Jo knew she'd come running. "Go to sleep, Princess."

"Mmmm. Love you."

"I love you, too." Jo bent down to kiss the crown of Blair's head. "Sweet dreams."

Blair shifted against her, and Jo closed her eyes. She had the beginnings of a plan, and a lot to do, and if she behaved, maybe she could get rid of the babysitters by the end of the year.

* * *

><p>Jo went to the public library the next day to use the computer and get information about the GED tests. There wasn't enough time before Christmas to do everything, but she could be finished by Blair's birthday. The first thing she had to do was get a Massachusetts driver's license, to establish residency. Jo checked the time, and decided to do that tomorrow. Blair was in classes all day, and she would have plenty of time.<p>

She got back to the apartment shortly after Blair did, and got a very warm welcome. Jo didn't let Blair sidetrack her. "I gotta go do something."

"You just got home."

"Yeah, I know, but I couldn't take the nurse to do this."

"To do what?"

"When I first got here, I cleaned out a coupla vampire nests. One of them was full of stuff. I wanna see if it's still there."

"What are you looking for?"

"Computer."

"I'll get you a computer, Jo. I'm getting tired of using the lab anyway."

"Blair, you can't just keep spendin' money on me."

"Jo, it's my money and I'll spend it however I please."

"Your parents all ready think I'm spongin' off you."

"My parents don't run my life. I told them, and I'm telling you, anything I spend on you is my money. I earned it. It wasn't given to me, it's not part of my allowance, it doesn't come from them in any way. If I want to spend it on you, I will. And since we're having this discussion now, let's get everything in the open."

"Blair."

Blair talked over Jo. "I added you to my personal accounts." Blair got up and walked over to her desk. She opened the center drawer and pulled out some envelopes, then returned to the sofa and gave them to Jo. "ATM card, Visa, American Express, checkbook," she enumerated, and paused for a few seconds before handing over the final envelope. "This is the brokerage account for the money you gave me before you. Before." She handed it over.

"Blair."

"When you came back, I called the lawyers and changed my will. If something happens to me, you'll have enough money to be comfortable for the rest of your life."

"Blair."

"I'm not finished."

Jo nodded.

"The next time we're in New York, we're going to the lawyer's office so I can sign the papers to give you power of attorney, so you can make decisions for me if I can't. There'll be one for you, too, if you want to sign it."

"You done?"

"Yes."

"Just for the record, you're know you're crazy, right?"

"Crazy about you."

"Like I said. You didn't have to do any of that, but thank you. I'll sign anything you want me to sign."

"Good. What kind of computer do you want?"

"Apple."

Blair stood up. "Let's go."

"Go?"

"Get your computer. There's an Apple store in Boston."

They left the Apple Store with an iMac for the apartment, a laptop for each of them, an AirPort router, iPods for both of them, a printer, and several pages of notes that Blair jotted while they talked with the expert. Jo nearly choked at the bill, but Blair paid it without blinking. On the way home, they stopped for dinner.

They unpacked and hooked everything up when they got home, and Jo promised to call the cable company about adding Internet service to their account. Jo called first thing in the morning and heard the magic words "self install." She took off from the apartment, jogging toward the bus stop, the nurse struggling to keep up. She stopped first at the motor vehicle department office to swap her New York license for a Massachusetts one. She lied on the application about having no medical restrictions, but she didn't really care. Not being able to drive was temporary, like not patrolling.

From there, Jo went to the cable office. She filled out the paperwork and left with a small box and a satisfied smile. She stopped at a sandwich shop once the bus journey was finished, and treated the nurse to lunch, then went back to the apartment and went to work.

By the time Blair got home from class, Jo was at the desk, looking at something on eBay.

"What is that?" Blair asked, unable to figure it out from over Jo's shoulder.

"The world's ugliest vase."

"And you're looking at it because?"

Jo closed the web browser. "Trying to figure out what to get your mother for Christmas."

"That's definitely not it." Blair dropped her satchel and leaned over to kiss Jo. "Hello."

"Hi."

Blair pushed the wheeled chair out a few inches and settled on Jo's lap. "I was thinking about you today."

"I was thinking about you, too." Jo kept one arm around Blair and got her wallet with the other. She handed Blair her new license.

"Those photos are always so horrible."

"I can't take the GED tests unless I'm a resident." Jo took the plastic back from Blair and returned it to her wallet. She tossed the wallet on the desk.

"I didn't mean you had to do it this week."

"I know. I just wanted to show you, you know, that I'm gonna."

"Jo, as soon as you promised me, I knew you would."

"So what were you thinkin' about me?"

"Nothing like that." Blair smiled and kissed along Jo's neck.

"Huh. I worked my butt off all day and you sat around and daydreamed."

"Fantasized," Blair corrected, working her way back up, along Jo's cheek to her lips.

* * *

><p>Over the weekend, Blair tried to keep track of how many petit mal seizures Jo had. She counted eight on Saturday. On Sunday, she had two during mass, one during brunch, and at least one more while they read the paper. While playing a video game late in the day, Jo had a major episode. After spending some time on the floor with her head in Blair's lap, they moved up onto the couch, where Jo continued to use Blair as a pillow. Blair watched her thoughtfully, and after she put Jo to bed, called Dr. Hudson's office and left a message with the service.<p>

The phone rang an hour later. "Ms. Warner?"

"Doctor Hudson."

"What's going on now? She bouncing off the walls again?"

"No, thank goodness. The nurses aren't able to keep track of the smaller episodes, so I paid a lot of attention to Jo this weekend."

"And that's new?"

"She had eight yesterday, maybe more, and at least four today, plus a big seizure."

"How's her language?"

"Fine."

"Before today, when was the last big seizure?"

"When we were in New York."

"So, what, a week ago?"

"Yes."

"Anything change?"

"Things change all the time."

"I mean anything major."

"Road trip, new computers, and she ran around on the bus all day Friday."

"Wow, you weren't kidding. Tell you what, keep track of the seizures, see if you see a pattern. If she has more than six minors on consecutive days, call me. Make sure she takes her meds. Other than that, I'll see you both at the next appointment."

"Thank you."

"It's what I'm here for, Ms. Warner. Get some sleep."

Blair left written instructions for the nurse to pay close attention to Jo through the day. Jo was sleeping when Blair left, and slept most of the morning. It was after 11 when she went into the kitchen for coffee. Jo took her mug and stood at the window to watch the rain. She decided that she had nothing to do outside today, and stood a while longer, jolted back into awareness when the mug hit the floor and threw coffee onto her bare feet.

Jo swore, and was too busy cleaning up the mess to notice that the nurse jotted a note. She fixed something to eat, and after clearing that up, sprawled on the sofa to watch television. She had two more spells – her failure to blink alerted the nurse – a nap, and another small seizure before Blair got home. Between then and bed time, Blair noted five more.

The next day was much the same, both weather-wise and in the number of seizures Jo had. She spent quite a bit of time on the computer, and it was easy to tell when she came to a halt, for both Blair and the nurses. Jo had her eighth seizure that day around 3 p.m., and Blair went directly to the phone and called the neurologist.

Fortunately, there was a cancellation the next morning, and Blair gladly took the appointment. By the time she finished the call, Jo was beside her. "What?"

"You're seeing Dr. Hudson tomorrow morning."

"What for now?"

"To ease my mind."

Jo sighed and rolled her eyes. "You're missin' too many classes."

"I talked to my professors and they understand. Besides, the girls get notes for me."

"It's not the same as you bein' there."

"That's immaterial. You're going."

"Didn't say I wasn't."

"And I'm going with you."

"Of course you are."


	14. Chapter 7B

"I hate the fucking hospital."

"It's only for a day. Two, tops. I'll be there."

"Two days when I can't do anything because they'll have me wired up like a Christmas tree."

"There definitely won't be an angel over your head."

Jo glared at Blair.

"Once we know what's going on, we'll come home."

"Good morning, Ms. Polniaczek, Ms. Warner." Dr. Hudson smiled cheerfully.

"Unless you're here to spring me, you can turn around and leave," Jo answered.

"You're going home today."

"What did you find?" Blair asked.

"It's more what I didn't find. I think this is just part of the healing process. It's been accelerated all along, so I think this will pass soon."

"In the meantime?"

Dr. Hudson looked at Jo. "Still the same. Take your meds, try to avoid stress, don't bang your head on the floor. No driving. Get dressed and I'll get your paperwork done." She left them.

"Happy now?" Jo asked.

"Thrilled," Blair answered honestly, smiling.

When the doctor returned 20 minutes later, Jo was fidgeting. Once they were finished with the paperwork, Jo asked, "Doc, can I lose the babysitters?"

"Not yet."

"C'mon," Jo whined.

"Nope. You go a month with no major episodes, I say it's safe for you to be alone. Until then, someone needs to keep an eye on you."

"Damn it," Jo muttered and hopped off the bed.

"Wheelchair," Dr. Hudson reminded her.

"No." Jo picked up her bag and walked out the door. Blair rolled her eyes, took the discharge papers, said goodbye to Dr. Hudson, and followed her.

* * *

><p>Jo and Blair were both busy for the next two weeks. Between preparing for the holidays and the end of the school term, Blair was on a tightly scheduled tear. Jo stood back and watched everything happen. She did her own shopping while Blair was in school. The find that delighted her the most was a ring, the channel of silver colored metal holding diamonds.<p>

She bought her mother a new winter coat. At an antiques store, she found an intricate gold cuff bracelet for Blair's mother, and a fountain pen for her father. She bought a few other things for Blair - a leather notebook, a gold necklace, and a silk blouse – before her cash reserve was tapped out. She and Amy talked about it, and decided against exchanging gifts. It was just too weird, they concluded.

Blair's last final was on Friday, exactly a week before Christmas. She came home and disappeared into the bedroom. An hour later, she came out carrying two small bags, which she put by the door before finding Jo in the kitchen.

"You ready to go?"

"Go where?"

"Someplace warm and sunny."

"Works for me."

"I packed your bag. We need to get moving so we don't miss our flight."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. Get a move on."

Someplace warm and sunny turned out to be a resort in the Virgin Islands. After shopping for swimwear and a few outfits, they spent the rest of the time on the beach or in bed. Jo continued to have small seizures, and Blair continued to keep track of them, but didn't make a big deal out of it.

They went back to Wellesley on Tuesday, and on Wednesday, packed to go to New York. Blair took care of choosing clothes, knowing they had at least three parties to attend. She worried a little about their effect on Jo. On Christmas Eve, at least, they would be at her mother's, so Jo could slip away to lie down if she had to. The other nights, they would play by ear. They had to make at least an appearance at parties on two other nights before they could return home.

They'd talked about what to do for New Year's Eve, but hadn't reached a decision. Blair's paternal grandparents gave a formal party every year. They could go to Times Square, or they could just stay home in Wellesley. Blair wanted to go to her grandparents' party, while Jo leaned toward staying home. Both of them knew that if Blair really wanted to go, Jo would accompany her.

A large suitcase and two suit bags later, Blair was finished. Jo, who finished packing the gifts an hour before, looked at them on the bed and sighed. Blair did not understand traveling light. Jo picked them up, and Blair went to the front door. She held it open while Jo exited, picked her purse from the closet door, and closed it. In the elevator, she found her keys in her bag, and by the time Jo reached the trunk, it was open.

Jo got the computer bag and the suitcase full of wrapped gifts. Blair got their coats, and they went downstairs again. Jo put these bags in the floor behind the passenger seat and got in the car.

They had dinner with Monica that evening, but she left them to attend a charitable function. Jo and Blair lay in Blair's bed and watched television.

Jo put her foot down about Christmas Eve shopping, and instead, they went first to the lawyer's office. After that, they went to Rockefeller Center and ice-skated for an hour. They had a cup of hot chocolate and walked around and looked at decorations for another hour before deciding they had enough of the crowds and went back to Monica's apartment to hide in Blair's bedroom for the rest of the day.

The party was beginning to thin out by 10 p.m. Jo was glad. She'd been caught by Blair several times staring at nothing, and she was tired. She let Blair talk, answering only direct questions, otherwise smiling and trying to look interested. Blair kept them away from the spiked punch bowl.

Christmas morning, Jo woke first. Blair covered her, and Jo sighed happily. Although the other gifts were under the tree, she kept the ring nearby. Blair was beginning to wake up, and when she raised her head, Jo smiled at her. "Merry Christmas."

Blair kissed her. "Merry Christmas."

"I have something special I wanna give you before we get up."

"Me too."

"Bathroom and back to bed?" Jo suggested.

"Deal." Blair kissed Jo again before rolling out of bed. Jo waited until Blair left the room to open the nightstand drawer and pull out the ring box. She put it on the nightstand and closed the drawer, then got out of bed. She straightened up the covers while she waited for Blair to return.

Jo took her turn in the bathroom, and Blair got a box of her own from her purse. When Jo came back, they sat beside each other in the middle of the bed. Jo handed Blair the small box. "I'm really glad you're back in my life, and I want to make sure you know it." She kissed Blair's cheek. "Merry Christmas, sweetheart."

Blair opened the box and smiled. "I think we had the same idea." She handed Jo a box.

Inside, Jo found the mate to the ring she gave Blair. She smiled hugely.

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes," Jo answered, and kissed her.

They slid the rings onto each other's left hands and kissed again, trading "I love you"s, before getting up to begin the day.

Christmas was quiet. They traded gifts with Monica, then caught a cab to visit David, and a third to have dinner with Rose. It was 10 p.m. before they returned to Manhattan.

The rest of the week was equally busy, and before they knew it, it was New Year's Eve. Blair's grandparents were looking forward to meeting Jo, her grandmother told Blair, and Jo knew that was what they were doing on New Year's Eve. She wasn't looking forward to it at all, not even to seeing Blair all dressed up.

The all dressed up bit was pretty good, Jo had to admit. Blair was lovely. Jo felt more comfortable than expected in the dress Blair picked out for her, but would have preferred a tux. "Do we have to dance?"

"Yes."

"I don't know how."

"All you have to do is relax and follow me. Come here."

Jo approached Blair. Blair placed Jo's right hand at her waist and picked up her left.

"Ready?" Blair asked.

Jo nodded. Blair began to move. Jo had trouble at first, but Blair persisted until they were dancing smoothly.

"See? It's not a big deal." Blair kissed her.

At midnight, they kept dancing through their kiss. The power stayed on, and none of the things everyone feared actually happened, and Jo and Blair left the party at 12:30. The streets were clogged with traffic, and there was no getting a cab. Fortunately, it was only a three-block walk.

That afternoon, they drove home to Wellesley to start the new year.

* * *

><p>It was a good year. Blair made the Dean's List, and Jo had fewer seizures. At the end of March, after three months with no major seizures and only one petit mal episode every few days, Dr. Hudson okayed Jo staying alone. Jo passed the GED tests on the first try. She completed the tests, and had the certificate before Blair's birthday in April. Jo didn't push patrolling, as much as she itched to do it. Instead, she continued reading and teaching herself how to operate different computer programs. She took Blair's car one morning, and Blair came home from class to find Jo on the floor with parts of three computers spread out around her. Two days later, the bits had been reassembled into one machine, and the rest were gone.<p>

At the end of June, they returned to Boston for another appointment with Dr. Hudson. Dr. Hudson had Jo in the hospital again. She took CT scans and EEGs, and told them that no sign of damage remained. They would try now to stop the anti-seizure medication, and if that went well, Jo would be released at the end of the year. Dr. Hudson told Jo to wait a month after stopping the medication, a seizure-free month, she stressed, to return to martial arts.

They spent the rest of the summer at the Warners' beach house in Georgia. Jo spent a lot of time training, although it didn't look that way to anyone who saw her. She ran in the sand and through the surf, played volleyball, and swam every day, rebuilding her endurance. When Blair returned to classes, Jo started patrolling again.

The first few nights, Blair was sitting up waiting for her, even though Jo agreed to come in by midnight and carried a new cell phone with GPS tracking. On Friday night, when Jo came in, she sat Blair on the sofa to talk before bed.

"You don't have to wait up for me."

"I want to."

"Then you shouldn't have taken 8:30 classes every morning. I'll be here when you wake up or you'll know why."

"What if you get hurt again?"

"It's"

"Don't you dare say it won't happen."

"It isn't likely. I'm being very careful. I wasn't then."

"I'm going to worry about you."

"Worry is fine. Obsessing isn't." Jo touched Blair's cheek.

"Have I been obsessing?"

"Maybe a little."

"So if I wait for you naked in bed, am I still obsessing?"

"No, naked in bed is another kind of obsession." Jo smirked. "Wanna see how it works?"

"Five minutes," Blair answered, and kissed Jo briefly before heading to the bedroom.

Jo started working on getting her boots off.

* * *

><p>That night, she had the first nightmare she'd had in a long time. Something was coming from under the ground to take everything she held dear, before setting its sights on her. Jo sat up panting, sweating, and it took a few seconds for her to realize it wasn't real.<p>

She got out of bed and went to the kitchen for a glass of water, and after she drank it, stood at the windows until she was calm enough to return to bed.

It wasn't any different from any other night of patrol. Jo stalked through cemeteries and alleys, again in her aunt's neighborhood. She was walking through the final cemetery of the night, on the way to her bike, when she heard movement behind her.

When Jo turned, there were two of the oddest-looking men she'd ever seen. They were pale, with eyes sewn shut. Black robes with silver decoration included hoods that sometimes covered their faces.

Despite not being able to see, they had a good idea where to slash with their big knives. Jo was quicker, and disabled and disarmed one after a minute or so of dancing around it. The second was a little harder, and she had to get around to its back so she could twist its neck.

When they were both down, Jo checked them for other weapons and memorized their faces, wishing there was enough light to take a picture with her phone. Something about the eyes bothered her, beyond the fact that they were sewn shut. She stashed the knives in her saddlebag and rode home, paying attention at every place she had to slow or stop.

Jo didn't go right to bed that night. She spent some time researching the beings she ran into on patrol, but didn't get very far. She went back to research when she got up, after another nightmare of something formless rising from the earth, and kept at it until 4 p.m. There was no patrol tonight, a year since Jo found Blair on campus. They had reservations at someplace in Boston that required them to dress up. Blair's flowers were delivered at lunchtime, and Jo knew she would delight in carrying them around all day. She half-expected a phone call about them.

Blair got home at 4:30, as she usually did, and once her arms were empty, tackled Jo on the sofa. "They're beautiful," she said between kisses. "Thank you so much."

"Mmm. You're welcome."

"What time's our reservation?"

"Seven."

"Plenty of time," Blair said, smiling. She got up from the couch and tugged on Jo's arm.

Jo scrambled to follow.

* * *

><p>On patrol the next night, in a different part of town, Jo was attacked by two more of the strange beings. This time, she sliced open her palm stopping a knife before she took them down. She cut off her shirttail to wrap around her hand until the bleeding stopped.<p>

Jo called it a night, then, and went back home to continue her research. She hoped, when she stumbled to bed exhausted, that she would sleep through, but she dreamed again, of demons and fire and the end of humanity.

The third night brought three of them, and a more difficult fight. She was so amped up by it that she was out until 3 a.m., chasing down shadows. When the alarm got Blair out of bed, Jo was at the computer, still trying to learn about the things she encountered in the cemeteries. Blair put her to bed, but even sleeping in sunlight, Jo's nightmares continued.

* * *

><p>There were no more of the strange things for a few weeks. Jo continued to research, but didn't find much. The next night, she encountered two packs of vampires and one of the strange robed men. When she got home, she looked up phone numbers she never thought she'd need again, and waited until 9:30 to call Sunnydale. She could tell someone answered each number, but there was too much static for Jo to recognize who or to have a conversation.<p>

That night, she stopped abruptly when she saw Buffy, leaning against a building, seemingly waiting for her.

"B?"

"Faith," Buffy smiled back.

"I tried to call you."

"I know."

"You shoulda let us know you were comin'. We'd'a picked you up."

Buffy shrugged. "It's not necessary."

"What're you doin' here?"

"I can't just drop in to see an old friend?"

Jo heard a noise and turned to look over her shoulder. She saw the robed demons and turned back to Buffy. "Have you seen these guys?"

"I'm familiar."

"You gonna gimme a hand?"

"Why would I do that?"

"Oh, c'mon, I didn't anything that bad." Jo turned to face the Bringers.

"Helping you won't get me anywhere near my goal."

"Your goal?" Jo disarmed one Bringer and used it as a shield against the others.

"To take over the world one Slayer at a time. Oh, wait. There's only one who matters."

"Whaddya mean?" Jo snapped the Bringer's neck and shoved its body forward. The second and third Bringers stumbled over it while she backed up.

"Well, let's see, I died, and Kendra came, and Kendra died and you came, and you died and the new girl came, and I died, but no one else came. So, smart math says knock off the experienced Slayer first, then the potentials, and when there's no one else, that child."

"Child." Jo kicked the second Bringer into the third, and while they were down, drove the first one's knife into their chests.

"Well, she's hardly experienced enough to be called a Slayer."

"Say you do all that," Jo said while she straightened up. "Then what?"

"The end of the world as we know it," Buffy chuckled. "And I feel fine. See you next time." She disappeared into a blip of light.

"Fuck, shit, piss, and corruption." Jo stared a few seconds longer where Buffy had been. She looked at the Bringers and sighed, then headed for her bike. Patrol was over for tonight. There were too many things she needed to learn quickly.

As soon as she got home, she tried to call Sunnydale again. There was only endless unanswered ringing. She worried about that, and checked the news. Nothing about any disaster in California, natural or otherwise, and she called repeatedly.

As morning approached, Jo decided that the first thing she needed to do was check on the newest Slayer and her Watcher in the hope they might have some information. She left Blair a note and walked to the church. Jo fidgeted through the service, and when it was over, walked to Father Mike.

"Good to see you, Jo."

"You, too, Father."

"Are you worried about something?"

"The other girl. In Boston. Is she all right?"

"I suppose so."

"Do you know how I can find her?"

"She's in Brookline."

"Could you be more specific?"

"They start in the St. Michael Cemetery."

"The fancy one?"

Father Mike nodded. "Why all the questions?"

"Let's just skip the crazy story and say somethin' really weird's goin' on."

"I can help," Father Mike offered.

Jo shook her head.

"Have you called California?"

"Can't get through."

"Is that why you're worried?"

"Part of it."

"Come with me." Father Mike turned toward one of the side doors.

Jo followed him to his office. She stood and watched while he went through a card file, then picked up the receiver and dialed a number. After several minutes, he hung up the phone. "No answer," he reported. "That's never happened before." He looked at Jo. "When was the last time you took communion?"

Jo shrugged.

"Come on," he instructed.

"I haven't been to confession."

"I think God will understand," Father Mike answered, and led Jo back to the empty church. He gave her communion, adding to the ritual his own prayer for her safety, and walked Jo up the aisle. He handed her a chain with a medallion. "Wear this and be careful," he said sternly.

"Yes, Father," Jo answered. "What is it?" she asked.

"St. Michael, warrior angel," he answered.

Jo put it on and slipped the medallion under her shirt.

"Be careful," Father Mike repeated.

"I will," Jo answered, and headed back to the empty apartment to try to get some sleep.

Blair woke her up when she came home from classes. "Have you been sleeping all day?" she asked with mock exasperation.

"Apparently." Jo sat up and stretched, then looked at the clock. "I gotta go," she said urgently, and got out of bed. She kissed Blair on the way to the bathroom, and again when she came back in to get dressed.

"Something wrong?" Blair asked while she watched Jo throw on clothes.

"Hope not. I'll probably be late." Jo started to leave, then turned around. She stopped in front of Blair. "I love you," she told her, and kissed her without hurry. Then she rushed from the bedroom. Blair heard the closet door open and close, then the front door.

* * *

><p>Jo knew she was early. It was still dusk. She could have stopped to eat, but her stomach was as unsettled as her nerves. She leaned against the mausoleum and looked around.<p>

At first, she thought they were shadows, but she caught a glimpse of a huge silver knife and took off after it.

It joined a pack surrounding a small, dark woman. She was fighting hard, but Jo kept losing sight of her and joined the battle to even the odds. When the Bringers were no longer a danger, the girl flew at Jo. When she landed a punch, she stopped moving and stared at Jo.

"Holy shit, you're real."

"Of course I'm real," Jo snapped.

"No, you don't understand. You've been out here every night, taunting me."

"It wasn't me. C'mon, we need to talk to your Watcher."

"Who are you?"

"Jo."

"I'm Kennedy."

Jo offered her hand. "Good to meet'cha. Let's go."

Kennedy shook her hand, and set off behind Jo.

They rode Jo's Harley, Kennedy giving additional directions whenever they stopped for a stop sign or traffic light. When they got to the house, the front door was open. Jo went in first, leading with the short sword she began carrying the night after she met her first Bringers.

The house was torn apart, furniture tossed aside, curtains down, and Kennedy's Watcher was dead in front of the fireplace, the hearthstones dark with her blood. Jo knew that the next time she slept, she'd dream of Catherine, see her blood spurt, smell her coming death, hear her scream until it was the only noise that ever existed in the world. Jo turned around and grabbed Kennedy's shoulders. The girl didn't need to see her Watcher's body. She directed Kennedy up the hallway. "Where's your room?"

"What's in there?"

"You gotta get some clothes so we can get outta here." Jo kept pushing, slowly moving them toward the staircase.

"Where are we going?"

"California."

"You're kidding."

"I never kid," Jo said. "Where's your room?"

Kennedy bolted up the stairs, and Jo followed her. "Get a couple changes of clothes."

Kennedy dove into her closet and threw two duffel bags out. Jo picked them up and tossed them on the bed. She grabbed the clothes Kennedy tossed toward the bed and rolled them tightly before fitting them into one of the duffels.

"C'mon, Junior, we need to go." Jo zipped the bag and tossed it to Kennedy.

"I need to get some weapons."

"You don't need a damn thing else. Let's go." Jo wasn't gentle about it. She had height, a little weight, and experience backing her up, and she marched Kennedy out of the house. They get on Jo's bike and ride out to Wellesley.

Jo woke Blair. "We need to go now, sweetheart," she said urgently.

"What's going on?"

"Those things I told you about, with the eyes sewed close? They're a warning. Something huge is trying to end the world, and we need to go to California."

"I thought there was a Slayer out there."

"I think she's dead."

"Call them."

"Tried. Can't get through. We have to go, Blair. Get dressed."

"All right."

"The new Slayer's in the other room. She's kinda freaked out."

"She's not the only one."

Jo ignored her. She pulled a suitcase from the closet. She put underwear, bras, and socks for both of them in it, two pairs of leather pants, jeans for each of them, half a dozen random shirts from the closet, and a handful of t-shirts.

Jo put the suitcase by the door and packed up the laptops. She took the iPods, too. They had a charger in the car. Blair came out of the bedroom, dressed and yawning. Jo introduced Kennedy, told Blair to get her coat and purse, and they left.

Jo was glad Blair traded her sports car for a sedan. They drove cross-country, changing drivers whenever who was at the wheel needed a break, Jo and Kennedy constantly monitoring their surroundings. Stop for gas, stop for one sit-down meal every 12 hours. Each gas stop, stretching legs, emptying bladders, clearing out trash. And looking around. Jo couldn't stop doing that, even when she and Blair embraced, Blair asking for reassurance that Jo, for the first time, couldn't give. All they could do was keep moving and hope it wasn't too late when they got where they're going.

When Kennedy drove, Jo and Blair stayed in the back seat together. Touching, always touching, while Jo and Kennedy talked about Slaying. Kennedy talked about her Watcher, grieving, but shed no tears. Jo hadn't, and Blair hadn't, and Kennedy was damned if she'd look like a little girl in front of them.

Jo pierced that veil. At the wheel, driving through the middle of the country where there was nothing but miles of empty fields and sky, with Blair sleeping in the back seat and Kennedy edgy in the passenger seat, Jo told Kennedy exactly how she felt watching Kakistos dismember Catherine and afterward. She told her how alone she felt, even in Sunnydale, and how much she missed simple human contact. She told Kennedy that the Watcher's Council was wrong, and Buffy was the proof that even Slayers need more than to fight and die.

Jo was hoarse when she finished, and Kennedy was crying silently, and Blair's hands, on her shoulders since she wasn't sure when, squeezed gently, and Jo knew she had a reason to fight. It wasn't duty or the way it made her feel. It was making sure Blair was safe, that their friends and family got to wake up every morning and live lives that were busy and fulfilling and in the long run meant as much as Jo's own.


	15. Chapter 8A

Simple breath implies  
>Ambition and self-charade<br>Beating blood is proof of pride  
>And flesh a testament to pain<br>Still, our bones bend up to stand  
>Our trembling angels deign to pray<br>Our animus laughing as  
>Grace saves the day<br>_Grace Saves the Day_

* * *

><p>"Yo, B!"<p>

Buffy, walking through a cemetery twirling a stake, turned when she heard the familiar voice behind her. "Faith, what are you doing here?"

"What, a girl can't miss her friends and come to visit?"

"Right," Buffy answered skeptically.

"Behind you," Faith nodded

Buffy turned to see three Bringers approaching. "You gonna help?"

"You can handle them."

"Or you can." Buffy walked toward Faith, holding out a knife.

Faith reached for it, and it passed through her hand.

"I so don't need this right now," Buffy groaned, and turned to the Bringers. She fought them, and was breathing hard by the time she killed the last one.

"It doesn't make any difference, you know. You can kill every demon on this continent, and I'll still take over the world."

"Tell somebody who believes it," Buffy said.

"You'll believe it," Faith said, and drew in on itself until it disappeared into a ball of light.

* * *

><p>Willow was on the computer when Buffy came in. "Faith's dead."<p>

Willow stopped working and turned in her chair to look at Buffy. "How do you know?"

"Had a nice chat in the cemetery, just like I had a nice chat with myself the other night."

"I'm sorry, Buffy."

"Can we reach Giles?"

"I don't think so. He's supposed to be back tomorrow, though."

"There's another Slayer out there, and he needs to find her before the Bringers do."

Willow nodded. "You all right?"

Buffy ran her hand through her hair. "Yeah. It's just, I dunno, after I got that note from her, I hoped some Slayer got to have a life away from the Watcher's Council. A real life, you know?"

* * *

><p>It was a little after noon when they reached Buffy's house. The ride through Sunnydale spooked Jo. The streets were empty, many of the businesses closed. The only evidence of life was the persistent line of traffic going the way they came.<p>

Jo parked the car in front of Buffy's house. It looked like shit, the yard torn up and plywood covering where the front windows used to be. She couldn't tell if anyone was there, but she got out of the car anyway. Jo knocked on the door, and it opened and was immediately slammed shut by Buffy. Jo knocked again. "C'mon, B, open the damn door."

"Go away," Buffy yelled.

"The hell I will. I been in the damn car for three fuckin' days. Let me in or I'm gonna bust the damn door down."

"Jo!" Blair reproved sharply, protesting her language, but Jo ignored her.

Buffy opened the door again, just enough to put her arm out. "Shake my hand."

"Have you lost your damn mind?"

"Shake my hand."

"Fine," Jo huffed, and grabbed Buffy's hand. She squeezed hard.

Before she let go, the door opened wide. "You're dead."

"Not hardly. This is my girlfriend, Blair, and Kennedy. She's a Slayer. This is Buffy. She's the original Slayer."

"You were dead," Buffy said, and closed the door.

"So were you, apparently."

"Long story."

"Faith!" Willow said, and hurried to hug her.

"Hey, Willow." Jo hugged her back.

"Faith?" Blair murmured when they separated.

"I'll tell you tonight," Jo answered quietly.

"B, is Giles around?"

"He'll be here in a bit. He took the potentials to the gym."

"We'll wait for him," Jo decided. "Any decent hotels around here?"

"You're staying here," Buffy said firmly.

"Uh, no offense, but."

"No buts, Faith. Get your stuff. You can take my room and I'll share with Dawn."

"I'm not kickin' you outta your room."

"You can stay at my place," Willow said, ignoring Buffy's dirty look.

"I'll stay here," Kennedy volunteered, smiling at Willow.

"Nobody's going anywhere until we talk to Giles."

"Can I at least take a shower?" Blair asked.

"Upstairs, second door on the right. Towels are in the hall closet," Buffy told her.

"Thank you," Blair said.

"I'll get the bag," Jo said.

"Thank you, sweetheart," Blair answered from the second step.

"How long have you been a Slayer?" Willow asked Kennedy.

"Couple years. Where's the kitchen? I need some water."

"C'mon, I'll show you." Willow waited for Kennedy to get closer before turning toward the kitchen.

Jo returned to the house. She dropped Kennedy's bag and started up the stairs.

"I need to talk to you," Buffy said.

"Yeah, I know. I'll be down in a bit," Jo answered without stopping.

She went into the bathroom and locked the door. She checked that the other doors were locked, too, then removed her clothes and stepped into the shower behind Blair.

Blair handed her a washcloth. "You didn't tell me she's beautiful."

"Didn't notice." Jo squirted shower gel onto the cloth and made a face at the sweet fragrance. She began washing Blair's back. "I kinda hated her."

"Why?"

"I hated everybody then. Plus, her boyfriend was a vampire."

"Were you jealous?"

Jo laughed while she knelt to wash Blair's legs. "I thought she was fraternizing with the enemy."

"I don't understand."

"I didn't understand either. Turn around."

"Next you're going to tell me you didn't notice Willow, either."

"I noticed her."

Blair wrapped her hand around Jo's wrist and moved the washcloth away from her breasts. "No teasing."

"I like teasing," Jo pouted, but raised Blair's arm to clean her armpit.

"I like it, too, when we're home and we can go from the shower to our bed."

"We'll be home soon," Jo said, and raised Blair's other arm. "Want me to wash your hair?"

"I'll get it, you get cleaned up."

They switched places. While Blair washed her hair, Jo bathed. She finished quickly and began washing her own hair. She and Blair switched places so Blair could rinse, then changed again so Blair could use conditioner while Jo rinsed the shampoo away. They traded one more time, and Blair got out of the shower. When Jo finished, she turned off the water and opened the shower curtain.

Blair handed her a towel. She was all ready in her underwear, a towel around her hair. Jo dried off and turbaned the towel on her hair. When they were both dressed, Jo opened the hall door to let out some of the steam. She combed out Blair's hair, and stood impatiently while Blair combed hers. Jo put their dirty clothes in the outside pocket of the suitcase and picked it up. Blair followed her downstairs. Jo put their bag beside Kennedy's and followed voices to the kitchen.

"Your bag's in the other room," Jo told Kennedy.

"Thanks." Kennedy left, and a few minutes later, they heard the shower start.

"You want anything?"

"Water?" Jo asked, and looked at Blair, who nodded.

Willow got water while Jo and Buffy looked at each other. "You died too, huh?" Jo said.

"Hell god this time."

"Damn. Thanks," she added to Willow.

"What got you?"

"Got jumped by a gang of vampires and punks."

"What are you doing here? And where'd you find Kennedy?"

"Oh, man." Jo sighed. Blair squeezed her thigh, and Jo smiled at her. "I was patrolling and these weird guys in robes attacked me. Eyes sewed shut, never said anything, led with big knives."

"Bringers," Willow said.

"Three nights in a row, and I couldn't find anything about them. The next night, I saw you, B. You told me you were gonna wipe out the Slayer line and open the Hellmouth, so I went looking for Kennedy. Figured her Watcher could tell me something. I found Ken under a pile of Bringers in a cemetery. We went to meet her Watcher, but they got there first." Jo swallowed some water and looked at Buffy. "So what's going on?"

Buffy took a deep breath. "End of the world, unless we can figure out how to stop it."

"Are you serious?" Blair asked.

"We never joke about apocalypses until they've been averted," Willow said.

"Whadda we gotta do?"

"That's where Giles comes in. He'll be back soon."

"Yeah, you said something about potentials? What's that?"

"Potential Slayers. The Bringers have been killing them and the Watchers all over the place. Giles brought them here."

"To make it easier for whatever that is to kill them?"

"No, so I can protect them. So we can protect them," Buffy amended her statement.

"How can you protect anybody here? You can't even see what's coming," Jo nearly yelled.

"I'm doing the best I can," Buffy said defensively.

"Jo, calm down," Blair urged.

The front door opened, and girls filed into the living room. Giles was behind the last of them. He left them to argue over who was first in the shower and what to watch on television and went into the kitchen.

"Buffy, I believe we should." He stopped in the doorway.

"Hey, Giles."

"Faith?"

"Yo."

Kennedy came downstairs and dropped her bag next to Jo and Blair's. She ignored the girls in the living room and returned to the kitchen. "Excuse me."

Giles turned around. "Who are you?"

"Kennedy. Whose are you?"

"Excuse me?"

"He's mine," Buffy answered and got out of her chair. "Come sit down. We have a lot to talk about."

Giles took the seat Buffy offered and removed his glasses. He began polishing them. "Will someone please tell me what's going on?"

"Faith didn't stay dead either," Buffy began. "Kennedy's the Slayer after her. Blair," Buffy pointed, "is Faith's girlfriend."

"Her name is Jo."

"Yeah," Jo agreed. "Faith was a pseudonym."

"Was anything you told us true?" Buffy demanded.

"Everything else," Jo assured her.

"Why are you here?"

"Well, from what B said, the world's endin' again."

Giles set his glasses on the table and rubbed his forehead. "I'm glad you're here," he said after a few seconds, and replaced his glasses on his face.

"What's goin' on? Willow said you would explain."

Giles did. He paused his narrative several times to answer questions before he finished.

"How many girls are out there?" Kennedy asked.

"Eight potentials and my sister," Buffy sighed.

"So that makes 14 women using one bathroom," Blair said. "We are definitely going to a hotel."

"I told you, you can stay at my place," Willow said. "You can take some of the potentials."

"Defeats the purpose of us getting a room," Jo muttered.

"We need to stay together," Buffy insisted.

"Why?" Willow asked. "With three Slayers, we can protect the potentials."

"I'll pay for everybody's rooms," Blair volunteered.

"The Hilton has a restaurant," Dawn volunteered from the doorway. "Who are you people?"

"That's my sister Dawn," Buffy said, and began pointing. "Kennedy, Slayer. Faith, uh, Jo, Slayer. Blair, she's with Jo."

"The Hilton will do," Blair said. "Do you have their number?"

Buffy got the phone book from the drawer beside the refrigerator. "Can you afford this?"

Jo laughed. "Blair could buy all the Hiltons."

Blair made a face at the phone book. "I would not buy out the Hiltons. Can you imagine how much more obnoxious Paris would be?" She took the phone from Buffy and punched in the number. It rang endlessly. "No answer."

"Probably packed up and left," Willow said.

Blair hung up the phone and stood behind Jo. "I think we should check it out."

"It's getting late," Buffy said.

"I'll go with you," Willow said.

"Me, too," Kennedy said.

"Car's full," Jo said, before anyone else volunteered.

The Hilton, like the rest of Sunnydale, was abandoned. The restaurant refrigerator and freezer were full of food. The more they walked around, the more convinced Willow became they should relocate.

On the phone to Buffy, she counted the reasons. "There's plenty of food. Computers, internet, and cable. Gym. Pool. Bathrooms for everybody. We can use the interior rooms, so it'll be hard to know that we're here."

"I get the distinct feeling I'm being outvoted," Buffy said.

"If this gets put to a vote, it'll be a landslide," Willow answered. "We can have Xander and Anya and Giles here with us, too."

"Fine, Will, you win. Tell Giles." Buffy handed him the receiver and went into the living room. She grabbed Dawn. "C'mon," she said, and took them upstairs. At the top of the stairs, she told Dawn to pack a bag, and went into her own room to gather some clothes.

She carried her bag downstairs and put it with the others. "Listen up!" Buffy ordered. "Go get your stuff together. We're relocating. Everybody better be back down here in 10 minutes."

After the rush of bodies passed, Buffy went to the kitchen, where Giles was hanging up the phone. "I figure we'll take them two or three at a time in your car."

"The others are coming back to get their things."

"That'll help. After the first bunch, one of us can stay there to keep an eye on everything."

Giles nodded. Buffy went to the phone and called Xander. He told her that he and Anya would be at the Hilton within an hour.

When the others returned, they held a quick confab on the porch. "Rock paper scissors to decide who babysits where. Here first."

Buffy lost the first round and sighed. "I'll stay here."

Jo and Kennedy looked at each other. "I'll take the hotel," Kennedy volunteered.

"Guess I'm chauffeuring," Jo said. She looked at Giles. "How many trips do you think?"

"Between the girls and their belongings, at least two apiece."

"Let's get to it."

They went inside, and the room immediately became silent. All eyes went to Buffy.

"Here's the deal," she told them. "We got two more Slayers on board now, and we're moving our base because it's all ready crazy crowded here. I'll be here until the last trip. Fa, uh, Jo and Giles will be driving you. Kennedy will stay at the other end until we're done. Molly, Amanda, Rona, and Chao-Ahn, you go with Giles. Caridad, you go with the others. The rest of us will wait here until they're ready for us."

Jo picked up their bag and Kennedy's. "Grab some bags, Ken."

Kennedy grabbed some at random from the pile, and she, Jo, Giles, and Blair went outside, the four potentials following. Jo and Kennedy put the bags in Blair's car, and went back inside for more to put in Giles' trunk.

They hurried to the Hilton, and unloaded the cars. Kennedy and the potentials carried the bags to a conference room, and they sat there, waiting.

Blair stayed with Jo. She waited in the car while Jo gathered the rest of the luggage and filled the car with it. Giles took the three remaining potentials in his car, and they made the next trip. Giles left Jo to deal with the luggage and the potentials while he went back for Buffy, Dawn, and Willow.

While Jo was unloading the car, Xander pulled up. He and Anya got out of the car, and Xander got their bags from the trunk. He dropped them when he saw Jo coming out to get the last few bags.

"Faith!" he crowed, and charged her.

"What the?" was all Jo got out before Xander had her in a bearhug. "Let go all ready," Jo said, and pinched him.

Xander yelped and let her go. "We thought you were dead."

"Lotta that goin' around. You gonna help or what?" Jo grabbed more bags. Xander picked up the ones he dropped and followed Jo into the conference room. They left the bags and went back outside. There were only a few bags left. "Hey, is there parking here or what? I don't wanna give away any clues if we can help it."

"No garage. We can park in the back or something."

"Close enough," Jo decided and picked up most of the remaining bags. Xander took the rest.

When they came out to move the cars, Buffy, Willow, and Dawn were getting out of the car. Jo went to Giles' window, and he lowered it. "We're gonna put our cars in the back."

"Fine. I need to get my things, and I'll park back there when I return."

"You want somebody to go with you?"

"I'll go," Buffy said, and returned to the car. "Get the girls in rooms and remind them to stay out of sight. Xander, you make sure Andrew isn't getting into anything."

"Got it," Jo said, and stepped back so Giles could leave.

"We need to go back and get the weapons anyway," Buffy told Giles.

"We'll do that in the morning," he said. "That way we can get them from everywhere."

"And if we get attacked tonight?"

"Everyone has at least one weapon," he pointed out. "You made it quite clear that they are to go nowhere without one, and all of them have taken that to heart."

"I didn't think they listened to anything I said."

"Quite the contrary, Buffy. All of those girls think a great deal of you."

"Do you think them being here will make any difference?"

"Absolutely. You won't be stretched quite so thin. Kennedy and Faith can help with patrol and training."

"Jo," Buffy reminded him.

"Ah, yes. Jo," he repeated. "As I was saying, they can help you quite a bit."

"We'll see."

* * *

><p>Willow wrote the room numbers on the keycards after she ran them through the encoder. She decided they would sleep on the second floor since there were only exterior guest rooms on the ground floor. She also put them all on the same corridor, which would make it easier to count heads if the need arose.<p>

Once the keycards were programmed, Willow went to the conference room. Everyone but Blair, Andrew, and Chao-Ahn was talking, and Willow whistled loudly to get their attention.

"Awesome!" she smiled. "Here's the deal. I have room keys here. Two potentials to a room, so find somebody and come get your keys, then take your stuff up and come right back down."

The potentials followed directions well, and after a few minutes of confusion, the conference room was much quieter. Willow gave two keycards to Blair, who handed one to Jo. She picked up their suitcase and computer bags, and they left. Willow gave Dawn a keycard. "You're with Buffy." Dawn rolled her eyes, but took it and her bag and left.

"Xander, I put Andrew in with you."

"I'm staying with Xander," Anya said. She got a disbelieving look from both Xander and Willow. "What? I'm not staying by myself."

"It's fine," Xander said, and picked up their bags. Anya took the keycards from Willow.

"Well, that leaves you and me, roomie," Willow said to Kennedy.

"Cool," Kennedy grinned. I'll take your stuff up."

"Let's wait for Giles and Buffy."

"Whatever you want." Kennedy leaned against the table and smiled at Willow. "So what's your superpower?"

Willow laughed. "I guess that's slightly better than 'what's your sign'."

"C'mon, you must have one."

"Nope. No superpowers here. I'm just research gal."

"So what, you just carry that power around for decoration?"

"What power?"

Kennedy looked at her, wondering if Willow was pulling her leg. "You light up my Slayer radar like a lighthouse."

"That's not supposed to happen," Willow said softly.

"It is."

"Hey, Will, where's everybody?" Buffy asked.

"Putting their things in their rooms," Willow answered. She turned and handed Buffy a keycard. "Dawn's all ready up there. Giles, I'm really sorry, but you got stuck with Andrew."

Giles took the keycards and went to Andrew. "I will bind you to a chair and gag you if utter a single syllable about anything not pertinent to our current situation. Do I make myself clear?"

Andrew swallowed and nodded.

"Get your bag and get upstairs," Giles ordered, and handed him one of the keycards. "Be back in five minutes."

"I gave the girls ten," Willow said quietly.

"Ten minutes," Giles said to Andrew's back.

"You ready now?" Kennedy asked Willow.

"Um, you go on and I'll catch up."

"Whatever." Kennedy grabbed her bag and Willow's suitcase. She left the computer bag sitting where Willow put it.

"Are you all right?" Giles asked.

"Kennedy said that I light up her Slayer radar."

"We talked about this, Willow," Giles said gently. "You have an immense amount of power."

"I don't want it. And why didn't Buffy ever say anything about it?"

"I don't know. It's quite possible that she doesn't notice it."

"Jo didn't say anything."

"Did you ask her?"

"No." Willow frowned. "Giles, what if she sees it, too?"

"Then we'll find a way to mask it so you don't stand out."

"What's for dinner?" Vi asked as she entered the room.

"We'll, um, we'll figure that out when everyone returns," Giles said.

* * *

><p>When they were finally organized, the draftees went to the kitchen with Blair and Anya. Jo, Buffy, Kennedy, Willow, and Giles went to the bar. Giles played bartender. He didn't ask what any of them preferred, just pulled beer for Jo and Kennedy, and poured brandy for Willow, wine for Buffy, and Scotch for himself.<p>

No one offered a toast. They looked at each other. The energy was definitely different with three Slayers in one room. "What happened to Maeve?"

"Bringers," Jo said.

Kennedy chewed on her lip and stared morosely at the table. Her Watcher was her responsibility, just like she was the Watcher's. She failed that most basic task.

Jo recognized her pain. "Not your fault," she told Kennedy.

"Indeed not." Giles said firmly. "They blew up the Council, girl. Your Watcher was collateral damage. As was yours," he added to Jo.

Jo took a deep breath. Her voice was steady when she asked Giles, "What's the plan?"

"We're still researching, both short-term and long-term items. The most pressing issues are posed by Bringers, just for sheer numbers. Many of the resident demons have left town with the humans."

"And Caleb," Willow added.

"And Caleb," Giles agreed. "If we can find out where he is, perhaps we can interrupt the creation or deployment of more Bringers."

"So we should just follow them home?" Kennedy asked.

"Yes. Two Slayers will patrol together at night. Each of you will have two nights on and one off. Buffy and Jo will begin tomorrow night, Buffy and Kennedy the next night, Jo and Kennedy the next," Giles instructed.

"Why not tonight?"

"We're taking a night off."

"What about the long term?" Jo asked.

"Somewhere, written down, is the information we need."

"I'll find it," Willow said. "I can run the searches on multiple computers using different parameters. That'll make it go a little faster."

"You can use ours," Jo offered.

"Thanks."

"That's our big plan?" Kennedy asked.

Buffy looked like she was mulling it over for a few seconds before she nodded. "Pretty much. That's how things work around here. Tomorrow, we'll gather the armory, and tomorrow night we'll get to work."

"It's your Hellmouth," Jo said. "I'm just visitin'."

"Glad you're here," Willow said. She looked at Kennedy. "I'm glad you're here, too."

Kennedy smiled. "I'm in." Jo rolled her eyes, but Buffy observed. Willow could take care of herself, but Buffy made a note to fill the youngest Slayer in about the facts of Willow.

"Very well," Giles said. "I suggest you all get some sleep tonight and meet for breakfast at nine?"

* * *

><p>After dinner, Jo turned their laptops over to Willow and she and Blair went up to their room. "Where'd you go before dinner?"<p>

"Confab with the big cheeses."

"You're a big cheese."

"Not here," Jo said.

"Why did they call you Faith?"

"That's what I told them to call me when we met."

"Why did you do that?"

Jo opened the door and they went into the room. She sat on the edge of the bed and began to remove her boots.

"Jo?"

"I, uh." Jo got her boot unlaced and slipped it off. She remained bent over, working the other laces.

Blair waited while Jo took the other boot off and leaned back on her hands. "I'd really like it if you would tell me," Blair said.

"I will," Jo said finally. "I just need a minute."

Blair nodded, walked to the edge of the bed, and stood between Jo's legs. "We're sleeping in a bed tonight," she smiled.

"Sleeping," Jo yawned, "being the operative word." She sat up and took Blair's hands. "You all right?"

"Not really. I'm bone tired, my hair smells like food, and Anya is totally insane in a completely rational way, which is pretty scary. My girlfriend has a secret, the world's getting ready to end, and we're right in the thick of it. Oh, and I'll probably miss finals. You do not want to hear what Mother will say about that."

"It'll be my fault. If we win, we'll get Giles and Buffy to write you a note."

Blair couldn't tell whether Jo was joking.

Jo didn't give her any clues. She yawned again, and scooted across the bed. Jo managed to pull the bedspread, blanket, and sheet down without getting out of bed, and laid down fully dressed. "C'mere."

Blair pulled down the covers on her side and slipped off her shoes. She climbed into bed and settled herself on Jo. "Faith?" she asked.

"It's kinda stupid," Jo said.

"Does it have to do with Catherine?"

"Yeah."

"That must've been horrible."

Jo swallowed hard before she agreed.

"Was it something she said?"

"Kinda." Jo kissed Blair's head. "After, right after, I just ran, you know, for the only place I felt safe. And I gathered up my stuff. I went by her desk. I don't know why. I never went anywhere near it before, but I went over there, and there was a book. It was open to an engraving of Kakistos. And there was a letter. For me. From her." Jo didn't tell her that it stayed in her jacket now, with her passports and the still valid Ohio license.

"She knew she was going to die?"

"I don't know what she knew. But she left me a letter. She said she was proud of me. She believed in me, and I should believe in myself."

Blair pushed herself up. "Did you?"

"I tried." Jo pulled her back down, needing the solid feeling of Blair's body against hers.


	16. Chapter 16

After breakfast, Buffy and Jo went out to gather weapons. "A hell god?"

"Yeah," Buffy answered. "It was me or Dawn or the end of the world."

"I don't remember her at all."

"She wasn't here then. It's a long story."

"We got nothin' but time."

"Why did you leave Sunnydale?"

"Honestly?"

Buffy nodded.

Jo caught it out of the corner of her eye. "I didn't belong here, and I would never let myself belong here."

"You could have stayed. We needed the help."

"Nah. I woulda gone nuts and taken you with me."

"How'd you meet Blair?"

"We went to school together before my Watcher found me."

"Is she, uh,"

"Loaded," Jo confirmed. "Also smart, funny, and gorgeous, in case you didn't notice."

"Figures," Buffy muttered.

"What?"

"Hellmouth curse. All Scooby relationships are doomed to fail."

Jo laughed. "You sound like a soap opera."

"We're about as much fun. Every girl Xander dates is a demon. Willow's dating history: cyberdemon, you, werewolf, gorgeous witch who died in her arms. Mine's almost as good. Angel, who lost his soul and turned back into a demon because of me, one night stand that I was too stupid to realize was a one night stand, Army demon fighter hopped up on special drugs and another vampire, who has been missing for the past two nights."

"Damn. So, wait, Anya is a demon?"

"She was a vengeance demon, and then she wasn't, and then she was again, and now she isn't. Another long story."

"When do you actually have time to stake vampires?"

Buffy laughed. "I haven't even seen a regular vampire other than Spike in more than a month. It's all Bringers and strays and the occasional ubervamp."

"What's an ubervamp?"

"A vampire demon. Huge, ugly, fast, and mean. The last one messed me up before I staked it."

"As long as they can be staked." Jo stopped in front of Buffy's house. "Where's your mom?"

"Dead."

"I'm sorry."

"Me, too. I really miss her." Buffy got out of the car and walked briskly to the front door. Jo was close behind. Buffy sent her to the basement, and immediately heard yelling. She ran to the kitchen and raced down the stairs.

"Can't we talk about this?" Spike asked Jo, who threatened him with a stake.

"Don't," Buffy ordered.

"Number two?"

"I am not number two anything," Spike said indignantly while Buffy nodded. Jo put the stake away.

"Spike, meet Jo. She's a Slayer."

He looked at her, and Jo stared blandly back.

"Where is everybody?" Spike asked.

"We moved to the Hilton. Come over tonight and I'll have Will set you up with a room."

"What happened to home and hearth, defending your castle?"

Buffy repeated Blair's objection to them staying there. "Fourteen women and one bathroom."

Spike nodded. There were fights about the bathroom when it was just Buffy, Dawn, and Willow. When the potentials began to arrive, even a schedule wasn't much help.

"We're gathering weapons," Buffy said, and went under the stairs. She pulled out a trunk and opened it. There were swords, knives, and stakes in it, and Buffy and Jo went through the basement and gathered weapons that were lying around.

They did the same thing on the other two floors, and ended up with two footlockers and two bags, plus a basket and a bag of magical supplies.

"We'll take these back and go to Giles' place next," Buffy said when they got everything in the car.

Giles' apartment required two trips because of the books he wanted. When they had everything at the hotel, Jo went in search of Blair. She found her in the conference room, studying a book.

She continued to study while Jo talked with Willow about the searches that still continued. They got deep into geek talk, and Blair took a moment from research then to look at them. She'd never seen Jo so relaxed and animated with anyone else. Jo and Willow were bouncing ideas off each other and occasionally they would become silent, bent over a sheet of paper holding diagrams and chunks of code, writing changes in different colors. After a while, Jo got up and went to Blair and Willow began typing furiously.

"Hey," Jo said and sat next to Blair.

"Hey yourself."

"What's that?"

"I still have finals coming up."

"We've got a while before dinner."

"You have something in mind?"

"Some time alone with you."

Blair smiled. "Sounds good." She stood up. Jo did, too, and they held hands on the way to the stairs.

* * *

><p>Patrol was more work than Jo expected. There were Bringers everywhere, especially around Revello Drive, and two Turok Han, encountered singly. Jo paid attention to Buffy, watching when she could. Buffy's fighting style was more fluid than Jo's, but she'd been at this longer, and Jo's training was restricted to martial arts.<p>

When Jo asked about her training, Buffy reminded her she'd studied ice skating and gymnastics. "And I was a cheerleader," she added. "The rest of it is stuff I picked up from Giles." Buffy paused, thinking. "I don't think I ever told you I was sorry about your Watcher."

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"Giles isn't my first Watcher," Buffy admitted. She kept pace with Jo.

"You should tell Ken."

"What do you know about her?"

"Like what?"

"Like anything."

"She's 19, she's a spoiled brat, and she's a decent fighter."

"Huh."

"What?"

"I was hoping she'd be younger."

"Why?"

"Cause she's looking at Willow like she's a buffet table."

"Oh." Jo paused for a second. "Why is that a problem?"

Buffy sighed. That long, ugly story was entirely her fault, no matter how she approached it or where she began it. "Last spring, Willow's girlfriend was murdered right after they got back together. I mean, right after. And Willow tried to end the world."

"That's what that was," Jo said quietly.

"You felt it?"

"Middle of May?"

Buffy nodded.

"I felt it. Man, she's got way more power than I thought."

"Willow?"

"Yeah. Don't tell me, you don't see it."

"No." Buffy frowned.

"When I met you guys, she was like, I don't know, a spotlight. Now she's a supernova."

"That would make sense to Wills."

"Really, really, really bright. Bringers behind us."

They turned, and continued the conversation through the fight. "So, what, she glows?"

"Kinda, but not really." Jo kicked one Bringer into another, putting them both on the ground.

"That's a Giles thing," Buffy decided, and decapitated the Bringer she was dealing with. "And that reminds me, why don't you have a Watcher?"

Jo shrugged. "They couldn't find me, and I think once I died they stopped looking. They had Kennedy." She decapitated the second and third Bringers.

Buffy took a breath and pulled out her cell phone to check the time. "2:30," she reported. "Time to head back."

"We have a curfew?"

"No. But training starts at 9 a.m., and the potentials need all they can get."

"I can't train them."

"Sure you can."

* * *

><p>The hotel was dark, and they went in through a side door. Buffy immediately went upstairs, but Jo went to the conference room to check the computer searches. Willow was there, poring over yet another thick text.<p>

"Hey."

"How was patrol?"

"Different. Why are you still up?"

"Habit, mostly. After Buffy died, I didn't sleep well, and after we brought her back, I stayed up to make sure she got home."

"She went up to her room."

"Why are you here?"

"Just checking stuff."

"The searches are still running. You can go to bed if you want. Blair just went up a few minutes ago."

Jo sat in the chair closest to Willow. "I'm sorry about your girl."

"Buffy told you?"

"Yeah."

"Did she tell you everything?"

"All she said was that your girlfriend was murdered and you tried to end the world."

Willow sighed, then stood up. This conversation required a drink. "C'mon."

Jo followed Willow to the bar. Willow raised the counter and went behind. "Got a preference?"

"Whatever you're having."

Willow looked over the bottles on display and pulled down the Wild Turkey. She got two glasses and looked at Jo again. "Ice?"

Jo shrugged.

Willow came out from behind the counter and went to a table. Jo sat across from her and Willow poured. She pushed one glass to Jo. "You weren't happy here, but you are now," she observed.

"Yeah."

"Did you ever stop Slaying?"

"Only when the doctor made me, and as soon as I could, I went back to it."

"What's Blair think about it?"

"She was mad." Jo paused, remembering the long discussions they had. "She didn't understand why I couldn't just let somebody else do it. I had a friend, a vampire, who covered for me when I couldn't work." Jo frowned. Amy just disappeared while she was laid up, and she never learned what happened to her. "And then I found out about Kennedy, you know, that another Slayer had been called, and Blair was really mad. She still doesn't like it, but you know, she accepts it."

Willow nodded. "We were glad you wrote. You were here and then you weren't. We hoped that since your stuff was gone, you went voluntarily."

Jo sipped her bourbon. "I take it you got better with the magic."

"You could say that." Willow looked at the table. "It was a process, you know, learning and experimenting. Trying to learn things that would help Buffy. And then I met Tara, and it was just, wow. She was amazing, and she made me amazing. Then Glorificus came to town. She was a hell god, looking for a mystical key to unlock the door between dimensions so she could return to the home she'd been banished from. Dawn was the key. A bunch of monks transformed her from energy into a human teenager and sent her to Buffy to protect."

Jo took another sip while she took it all in.

"Glory hurt Tara, and I went after her." Willow snorted. "Good thing Buffy came after me, because I was about an inch from getting my ass completely kicked. In the end, I was able to restore Tara, and that weakened Glory, but one of her minions had started the spell to open the portal. Buffy saved Dawn, but died to close it." Willow paused to drink. "When I went after Glory, that was the first time I used dark magic. It was this amazing rush, all the power. And with Buffy gone, we needed all the power we could get. And then it occurred to me, I can bring Buffy back. So I did.

"That was a huge mistake. She was in heaven, and we ripped her away from there and left her to claw her way out of her grave like every vampire she ever staked. And I had that huge rush again, and I was proud of myself, and I couldn't see what was happening. Tara saw, and she asked me to stop, and I couldn't. So she left me, and I got worse, a lot worse, before I was able to get better." Willow finished her drink and poured another, then topped off Jo's.

"She came back, and everything was perfect. She was happy, I was happy, Dawnie was happy, Buffy was better. It was perfect," Willow repeated, and sighed. "And then Warren came to kill Buffy, except one of his shots killed Tara. She was there and then she wasn't, and I couldn't bring her back. I didn't see any reason to keep being good without her. I went after him, and I found him, and I tortured him to death. Then I almost killed Giles and Buffy, I was trying to end the world when Xander stopped me. After that, I went to England for a while, to get control of the magic, instead of having it control me. And here I am, trying to keep the world from ending," she concluded bitterly.

"Penance?" Jo asked.

"Habit, I think, with a large dash of stupidity."

Jo nodded. "When my Watcher found me, she drugged me and dragged me off to Cleveland. I hated it, and I tried to leave. She warned me the first day that if I didn't do what they wanted, they would force me. I didn't believe them, and I ditched her and caught the first bus to New York. Next thing I know, state troopers are draggin' me off the bus in handcuffs. I busted them and kicked open the car door and took off running, and they took me down with a tranq gun before I got a hundred yards. When I woke up, there was a picture of Blair on the nightstand. They hurt her. Made it look like an accident, but they hurt her. After that, I went along. Every time I thought about getting away, I looked at that picture. And then Kakistos came to town. I dunno if he had some great plan or what, but he ripped my Watcher to pieces in front of me, and I started running. Catherine told me to come here, so I did. I was so angry then. I hated everybody. Buffy had her life, and Slaying on the side, but they took all that from me. That's why I kept my distance, so I didn't have anything else to lose." Jo drained her glass and held it out for a refill.

While Willow poured, she continued. "I used to hang out in the library, and I was readin' one day. I looked up, and there's a plain clothes cop talkin' to the librarian, and she pointed at me, and I was outta there like a shot. That's why I left. Never occurred to me that I hadn't done anything wrong. All I knew was that the Watchers sucked as bad as juvie, but at least the Watchers let you out at night. So I took off. Headed east. I was so lonely, and I wanted to make sure Blair was all right, except when I saw her, I couldn't turn around and leave again. And once she got hold of me, she didn't let go. I dunno why they didn't send another Watcher after me once we got together. Maybe it was too much of a problem, or maybe they never thought to look for me in the _New York Times_ society section. And after they got a new Slayer, they didn't give a damn."

"Definitely the last."

"And then the dreams started, and the Bringers came, and here were are. Have to remind Blair tomorrow to send an e-mail about her classes. I don't think they'll take helping my girlfriend save the world as an excuse for missin' finals, but we'll think of somethin'." Jo sniggered. "I told her I'd have Buffy and Giles write her an excuse note if we win."

Willow laughed, and Jo laughed with her. When they settled down, Jo asked, "What's the deal with Buffy and vampires?"

"Damn if I know," Willow answered. "Spike went off and got his soul back after they broke up, and I'm not sure what's going on with them now."

"I almost staked him yesterday."

"Glad you didn't. We need every body we can muster."

"What are we lookin' for?"

"Not sure exactly, but we'll know it when we find it."

"And in the meantime?"

"We do what we've been doing." Willow drained her glass and poured a small amount. She raised the bottle toward Jo, who put her hand over her glass. "Tell me about Kennedy."

Jo shrugged. "She's a Slayer."

"C'mon, you know more than that."

"Not much. She seems ok." Jo paused for another sip. "Buffy's gonna talk to her."

Willow groaned.

Jo laughed. "It's all right. Ken's a Slayer, she'll totally ignore anything she doesn't want to hear. You like her?"

"I think so."

"Go for it," Jo told her.

"But"

"No buts, Red. Go for it. You know how short life is. Especially around here."

"Yeah."

Jo emptied her glass. "You're allowed to be happy," she said, and stretched before standing up. "Even if it's just for a little while. I'm headin' up to bed. B wants me to help her with the girls in a few hours."

"Thanks for the company."

Jo shrugged it off. "Just returnin' the favor. Night."

"Good night."

* * *

><p>Buffy flipped Jo onto the mat for the sixth time in 10 minutes. She got up slowly, reining in her temper, and decided that tomorrow, Kennedy would be Buffy's crash test dummy.<p>

"Again," Buffy said to the potentials. Moments later, she said, "Switch," and the other half of each training pair was thrown to the ground, her partner holding her there, a stake poised over her chest.

They practiced this move for half an hour before moving on. As lunchtime neared, Buffy and Jo talked quietly about what to do next, and decided to start showing the girls how to anticipate what their opponents' next action.

"All right," Buffy called. "Sit down and pay attention. Jo and I are going to spar, and we're going to talk while we do it, so you can understand what's going on." Buffy turned to Jo. "Ready?"

Jo didn't answer. She threw a punch, which Buffy ducked. "Vampires and demons don't fight fair. Neither should you."

"Saw it coming. Your shoulder tensed just before you raised your arm." Buffy attempted a kick to Jo's torso.

Jo caught her leg and pulled, throwing Buffy off balance. "Low kicks are better."

Buffy got back to her feet and went on the attack. "Quick is better."

"Watch the eyes. They give away the target." Jo bobbed and weaved, and only a few of Buffy's strikes landed. She grabbed Buffy's hand and pulled her into her body, hitting her in the gut with her other hand and slamming her shoulder into Buffy's torso, then knocked her feet from under her.

From the ground, Buffy swept her leg behind Jo's legs and brought her down. "Never stop. You only need one second to win."

They both scrambled up and circled. Jo attacked this time, and Buffy sent her flying. Jo rolled and came up on her feet. Buffy was there, pushing Jo back with a flurry of blows, most of which Jo avoided.

She saw an opening, feinted with her left fist, and kicked Buffy in the stomach. "You need less than that to lose," Jo said, and walked over and offered Buffy her hand.

"Good job," Buffy said as Jo pulled her up. She faced the potentials. "After lunch, I want you all in the gym for as long as it takes for everybody to spend 30 minutes on each machine. Then you can go for a swim. You're dismissed."

As the potentials left, Jo asked, "What are we doing?"

"Research."

"Research won't help," a second Buffy said.

"One, I told you about using my body. Two, nobody asked you."

It switched to Jo's body. "It doesn't matter what you do. You can't defeat me."

"Don't use my body, either. And get your incorporeal ass outta here."

It laughed and winked away.

Buffy looked at Jo. "Didn't know you knew any words with more than two syllables," she teased.

"There's a lot you don't know about me. C'mon, or there won't be any food left."

* * *

><p>Jo bailed on research in favor of spending time with the potentials. She went to the gym and helped them with the equipment, answering questions and taking time to learn everyone's names. When they went to the pool, Blair was all ready there, swimming laps the lane closest to the window. Jo waited at the end of the lane. Blair saw her and pulled up.<p>

"What?"

"Cannonball!"

"That," Jo said as one of the teenagers took a running jump toward the pool. She held out her hand.

Blair grabbed it and pulled Jo in. When Jo came to the surface, Blair was laughing.

"Happy?" Jo asked sarcastically.

"Absolutely," Blair smiled. She moved to the edge of the pool and pulled herself out. Jo followed.

They grabbed towels and dried off some before settling in chairs to watch and make sure no one drowned. After an hour, half of the potentials were bored and left. During the next hour, the remaining ones drifted away.

"You wanna finish your laps?" Jo asked.

"Yes, but I need to help in the kitchen," Blair answered.

"Havin' flashbacks?"

"A few. Anya's a slavedriver."

"So I've heard."

"Are you patrolling tonight?"

"Nope."

"Good." Blair stood up and held out her hand.

Jo got out of her chair and picked Blair up. She walked to the pool and dropped her in.

"What was that for?" Blair yelled when she came to the surface.

"Payback's a bitch," Jo answered.

"Aren't you going to help me out?"

"Do I look stupid?"

Blair stuck out her tongue and swam to the edge of the pool. She pulled herself out of the water. Jo threw her a towel.

"Truce?" Blair asked.

"Sure."

Blair fixed the towel around her hips, and Jo put another around her shoulders. They left the pool area holding hands.

* * *

><p>"Tell me about your training," Buffy asked Kennedy as they set out for the evening.<p>

"Lots of martial arts and edged weapons."

"Anything like dance or gymnastics?"

"I had ballet and gymnastics when I was younger."

"Good. That'll help. Tomorrow, you can help with training the girls."

"What're we doing tonight?"

"Trying to find out where Caleb's hiding."

"I thought you were kidding about following the Bringers home."

"Nope. Unless you have a better idea, that's the plan."

"Are things always like this?"

"Once or twice a year, but not usually this bad."

"My Watcher used to tell me about you."

"I'm sorry they killed her."

"She sent me out to patrol, that's why she was alone."

"It's not your fault, Kennedy."

"Yeah."

"It's happened to all of us, all right? Even me. My first Watcher was killed by vampires, and I couldn't do anything to save him."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"No. It's just a fact of life. Just like you can't be everywhere at once, you can't save everyone. You can't even save the ones you love sometimes." Buffy pointed toward their first cemetery of the night.

Kennedy changed direction.

"How'd you meet Jo?"

"How is it you two didn't stay dead?"

"Xander brought me back the first time."

"The first time?"

"The time that mattered. That's how Jo was called. And since you were called when Jo died, that means the Slayer line runs through you. Anything else is immaterial."

A Bringer zipped past them, then changed direction. Buffy and Kennedy jogged after him.

"Back to my question. How'd you meet Jo?"

"Oh, uh, I was patrolling and she showed up. I punched her, and she was real that time."

"That time?"

"She'd been following me around for a while, except she wasn't solid."

"The First."

"Yeah."

They were quiet for a while as they tracked the Bringer toward Sunnydale's eastern border. They stopped at the edge of the woods, trying to make sense of the scene before them.

"Didn't know this was here," Buffy said quietly to herself.

"What is it?"

"Bringer Central."

"Besides that?"

"Don't know. Willow or Giles can tell us. I count thirty."

"Twenty-seven."

"Still way too many for us. Let's get the cavalry."

* * *

><p>Xander stood in front of the potentials in the conference room they used for training. "Now remember, we're looking for killing blows only, people," Xander said, and handed the spiked bat he was holding to Rona. "So, chest and throat if it's a vampire. Stomach, chest and face if it's a Bringer."<p>

"What if it's something else?" Rona asked.

"Could happen. Something other-worldly. And here's a handy rule: don't go for the flashy tentacles just because they're waving 'em about trying to get attention. Go for the center, brains, heart, eyes," he said, pointing at each body part. "Everything's got eyes."

"Except the Bringers," Dawn added.

"Except the Bringers," Xander agreed.

"I don't want there to be tentacles. I'm not good with squishy," Molly said.

"I don't care if it's Godzilla," Colleen said, and raised a huge sword. "I want to get in this thing."

"Godzilla's mostly Tokyo-based, so he's probably a no-show," Andrew stated.

"Besides, if Matthew Broderick can kill Godzilla, how tough is he?" Amanda asked.

Andrew crossed his arms and whined, "Xander."

"Matthew Broderick did not kill Godzilla," Xander said. "He killed a big, dumb lizard. That was not the real Godzilla."

Rona looked askance at them. "You people are even crazier than her."

"Than who?" Xander asked.

"Buffy, man," Rona answered. "I mean, taking us right into the bad guy's lair."

"Well, that's where, generally speaking, you'd go to find the bad guy. And I don't think you came here to fight plaque," Xander said.

"No, I came here for protection," Rona answered.

"Well, you signed on to fight with," Xander started.

"Look, I know, but," Rona sighed, "this plan is trouble. OK, Buffy doesn't care how many of us she puts in danger."

"Let me tell you something about Buffy. In fact, you should all listen to this," Xander said firmly. "I've been through more battles with Buffy than you all can ever imagine. She's stopped everything that's ever come up against her."

Buffy and Jo slipped into the conference room.

Xander continued. "She's laid down her life – literally - to protect the people around her. This girl has died two times, and she's still standing. You're scared? That's smart. You got questions? You should. But you doubt her motives, you think Buffy's all about the kill, then you take the little bus to battle. I've seen her heart, and this time, not literally. And I'm telling you, right now, she cares more about your lives than you will ever know. You gotta trust her. She's earned it."

"Damn, B, I never knew you were that cool."

"Well, you always were a little slow."

"I get that now," Jo said.

"All right, let's saddle up."

* * *

><p>The Bringers were gone when Buffy returned with the others. They walked up to the front door, and Buffy turned to give the others directions. "OK. Set up a perimeter. Guard the door. I don't want anything getting in behind us. My team goes in first, we check the place out. You guys are our safety-net. If this place is a trap, we give the signal, you guys come in, guns a-blazing."<p>

"So what's the signal?" Xander asked.

"I'm thinking lots and lots of yelling."

"Got it."

"Shall we?" Buffy asked, and opened the door. Kennedy, Rona, Molly, Chao-Ahn, and Spike followed her into the wine cellar.

Molly looked around. "What is this place?"

"Looks like an old vineyard," Buffy answered.

"An evil vineyard, huh?"

"Like Falcon Crest," Spike said.

"Stay alert, you guys," Buffy said. "Bringers are here somewhere. Just need to find out where."

"Shouldn't be too hard," Spike answered.

Bringers moved out from the shadows behind the wine barrels and attacked. Neither side was able to get the upper hand, and the Bringers suddenly stopped fighting and walked back into the shadows.

Caleb walked into the light. "Well now, you girls are just burning with righteousness, aren't you? Problem is, you think you're blazing like suns, when really you're burning like matchsticks in the face of the darkness. You having fun? Now, I hope my boys haven't worn you out too much. I need you fit for when I purify you."

"Save the sermon, padre," Buffy told him. "I heard you have something of mine."

Caleb chuckled. "Well, I do now. You liked my little message, did you? You know, I ruined a perfectly good knife on that girl. Got her soiled blood all over the place. I may have to get a new truck.

"So, you're the slayer. The slayer," he continued, looking directly at Buffy. "The strongest, the fastest, the most aflame with that most precious invention of all mankind, the notion of goodness. The slayer must indeed be powerful." He punched Buffy and sent her flying across the room. "So, what else you got?"

Spike vamped out and attacked Caleb, but Caleb easily pushed him down. When Spike tried to get up, Caleb head-butted him, then threw him across the room. The wine storage tank burst when Spike hit it, and the wine pushed him across the floor.

"Let's go!" Kennedy urged the potentials, and they moved toward Caleb.

The Bringers reappeared and blocked Kennedy's path to Caleb. While she was busy with the Bringer, Caleb punched Kennedy into a stack of wine barrels. Rona ran toward her, but Caleb cut her off.

Rona swung the spiked bat at Caleb, but he caught it and stared into her eyes. "Miss," he said, "I do believe you have your own problems you should be worrying about." He broke Rona's arm, and the pain sent her stumbling back.

Caleb chuckled and picked a knife up from the floor and tossed it to a Bringer. As the Bringer raised his arm to stab Rona, he was hit by a crossbow bolt. Caleb looked toward the doorway, where Xander and Jo stood. "Oh, good," he said. "There's more of you."

Jo charged Caleb while Xander began to fight his way through Bringers to reach Buffy. Jo had a knife in each hand, but her attack didn't bother Caleb at all. He looked her up and down. "Well, you're the second one, aren't you?"

Jo ignored him and threw a knife at him. He avoided it, and she attacked him with the other knife. Caleb grabbed her arm and twisted it, then brought her other arm across it to hold her immobile. He stared into her eyes while he put pressure on her arm until it went numb and she dropped the knife. She grunted and kneed him in the crotch, and broke free when he reacted. She backhanded him.

Caleb grabbed her arm and twisted it painfully behind her back. Jo doubled over, and went to her knees as he twisted and pulled her arm while walking around to her front. "The Good Book has its moments, you know. Paul had some good stuff, for instance. But overall I find it a tad complicated." Caleb slapped Jo. "I like to keep things simple." He kicked Jo across the room into a stack of wine barrels. "Good folk, bad folk." Caleb paused to stop a potential with long black hair. He grabbed the sword she swung at him, then her face, and continued to talk. "Clean folk, dirty folk." Caleb snapped the potential's neck and dropped her.

Molly stared. "No!"

"Yes," Caleb answered, and walked toward her.

At the wall, Buffy tried to sit up. "Xander, get them out of here. We have to retreat. Do it."

Xander left Buffy leaning on the wall while she gathered her wits.

Caleb continued to advance toward Molly, who backed up. She remembered her weapon and raised her arm to stab him, but Caleb grabbed her wrist with one hand, her neck with the other while the other potentials fought Bringers.

Buffy got to her feet and back into the fight. She tried to reach Caleb, but Bringers slowed her.

"What can I say?" Caleb asked Molly. "I work in mysterious ways." He stabbed the potential, driving the knife in her hand into her torso before dropping her. "Also some fairly straightforward ones."

Enraged by what he did to Molly, Buffy rushed Caleb. She was more of a match for him now, and avoided his punches while landing some of her own. She hit him so hard he flew across the room.

Spike grabbed Buffy's arm. "We're all leaving," he said, and pulled her toward the door.

Xander helped Kennedy get up. "Are you ok?" When Kennedy nodded, he said, "Let's go. Come on," and helped her to her feet while Spike helped Rona. Xander turned and waved at the others. "Let's go! Come on."

Caleb grabbed Xander and turned him so they were face to face. "You're the one who sees everything, aren't you?" Caleb pulled back his hand. "Well, let's see what we can't do about that," he said, and gouged Xander's eye out with his thumb.

Spike left Rona and charged Caleb. The collision knocked Xander free, and he stumbled back before falling down. Buffy ran to him. "Xander, come on," she said urgently, ignoring for the moment the blood streaming down his face.

Spike returned and lifted Xander from the other side, and they carried him from the wine cellar. Caleb stood and smiled while he watched them leave.


	17. Chapter 9A

Beads of breath

Strung against

The shadow you've become

Words and lips and tongue

_Something You Said_

Buffy stood at the foot of Xander's hospital bed and stared at him. His eye and head were bandaged, and he was unconscious, nearly sitting up because the bed was raised. After a while, she left him and returned to the Hilton. In the conference room, Giles, Willow, Dawn, Jo, Blair, Kennedy, and Anya tended the wounded potentials, handing out ice packs, cleaning and stitching wounds, and wrapping sprains. Buffy watched for a few moments before walking away, Dawn's eyes on her.

Buffy walked the streets, arms wrapped around herself for comfort. The last time they'd been beaten this badly ended with her dead. Memories and old doubts rose to the surface, and new questions joined them. It was one thing for the Scoobies to follow her; Willow and Xander made it clear through the years that it was their choice to do so, and they continued to fight even in Buffy's absence. The potentials were another story. Giles brought them to her for protection, but they were dying in front of her eyes, picked off one by one by the First Evil and its followers. Buffy knew she would have neither rest or peace tonight, and the thought of returning to their headquarters made her ill.

She looked up and found herself in front of her home. She slowly climbed the stairs and sat on the porch swing, and finally allowed herself to cry.

In the wine cellar, Caleb talked to the First, which had Buffy's appearance. "Now, it's a simple story. Stop me if you've heard it. I have found and truly believe that there is nothing so bad it cannot be made better with a story. And this one's got a happy ending.

"There once was a woman, and she was foul, like all women, for Adam's rib was dirty, just like Adam himself, for what was he, but human. But this woman, she was filled with darkness, despair, and why? Because she did not know. She could not see. She didn't know the good news, the glory that was coming. That'd be you. For the kingdom, the power, and the glory are yours, now and forever. You show up, they'll get in line. 'Cause they followed her. And all they have to do is take one more step, and I'll kill them all.

"See? I told you it had a happy ending."

After all the injured were patched up and sent to bed, and after the other potentials drifted uncertainly to their rooms, Jo sat in the conference room and stared at the wall. She saw more blood today than she'd seen in her entire life, and they had nothing to show for it. Xander was at the hospital. Rona went, too, but was sent home with a cast and some pain pills. Willow left as soon as they finished tending the walking wounded, headed to Sunnydale Memorial to watch over her oldest friend in his drugged sleep. She had no idea where Buffy was. Dawn and Anya were turning pages in old books, and she hadn't seen Blair for a while. Kennedy, either. Jo stood up. "Go to bed," she told Dawn and Anya on her way out of the room.

Jo went to the bar. Blair and Kennedy were there, sitting morosely at one table. Blair had a glass and a wine bottle. Kennedy had a line of empty beer bottles, and Jo sighed before she slid into the empty chair closest to Blair.

Kennedy looked at her, but didn't say anything. Jo put her hand on Blair's arm and looked back at Kennedy. "Go to bed, Ken. Red won't be back until late if she comes back at all."

"This is fucked up," Kennedy slurred.

"Yeah. You goin' up, or do I have to carry you?"

Kennedy finished her beer and stood up. She swayed a little before getting her balance, then turned for the door.

Jo and Blair watched her leave, and Jo turned her attention to Blair. "You all right?"

"No, I'm not all right. What kind of crazy mess is this?"

"I'm sorry."

"Let's go home, Jo."

"We can't."

"Why not?"

"We can't," Jo repeated.

"Did you see those girls?"

"I was there. I got my ass beat, too."

Blair began to visually check her for injuries. "Are you hurt?"

"I'm all right, Blair."

"Then why can't we go home?"

"Because if we leave, and they lose, it will always be my fault." Jo lowered her head. "I can't live with that, and if we lose anyway, I want you here with me. I know it's selfish, Blair, but I need you."

"I thought, I don't know what I thought when you woke me up that night. Right up until tonight, I thought they were all crazy, or it was some mass psychosis or something. I don't even know what to think now."

"Then don't." Jo stood up and pulled Blair with her. She put her arms around Blair and held her as tightly as she dared. "Don't think about any of it. Just come to bed with me."

Blair leaned against Jo. After several seconds, she put her arms around Jo's waist.

Jo kissed her head. "I love you."

Blair nodded slightly. "Take me to bed, Jo."

Jo opened her embrace so her arm was around Blair's shoulder. Blair kept both arms around Jo's waist and leaned against her as they slowly walked to their room. When they got there, Jo pulled the covers aside and sat Blair down. She carefully removed Blair's clothing, then her own, before getting into bed with her. Blair immediately climbed on top of her.

"It's all right, baby," Jo said softly as she pulled the sheet over them. She put her arms around Blair.

"What if it's not?" Blair asked softly.

"We'll be together." Jo stroked Blair's back gently, easing her into sleep. Jo didn't sleep for a long time. She replayed everything she saw at the vineyard, and knew they'd been lured into a trap. She didn't understand why Caleb didn't continue the attack after they were obviously defeated.

Blair shivered against her and sometimes moaned, and her obvious distress added to Jo's uneasiness. She could stand anything, _anything_, except Blair being hurt or upset.

"Jo," Blair whimpered.

"It's all right, Blair. Go back to sleep. I've got you." She continued the even motion on Blair's back, soothing both of them. Soon, Blair was asleep again, and Jo closed her eyes. She could change nothing that happened, but she could try to make sure it didn't happen again.

In the morning, Buffy began the walk back to the hotel. The main drag was jammed with traffic, and drivers blared their horns impatiently. It looked like a newsfeed from the world's current hot spot, which was, Buffy mused, unfortunately accurate. She heard her name and stopped to look around.

"Hey, you," Clem said from the driver's seat of a red Volkswagen Beetle.

"Hey," Buffy answered.

"Can you believe this mishegas?"

"Yeah. You'd think these people had never seen an apocalypse before." Buffy chuckled. "What about you? Just going for a quick spin to 7-Eleven? In Nebraska?"

"It's getting bad here. Really bad. Hellmouth acting up again, people feeling it, getting crazier. You can't swing a cat without hitting some kind of demonic activity. Not that I swing cats, or eat. Nope. Heh. Cuttin' way back. Cholesterol. Morals. I mean, morals."

"Right."

"We've seen some bad stuff in this town before but, you know, this time, it's like it just seems different, more powerful." Clem shook his head. "I don't think anyone's gonna be able to stop it." He paused when he realized to whom he was talking. "I mean, I'm sure you'll do fine. Complete confidence in you. Heh. Uh, if anyone can do it, you can, because you rock! If you save the world, I'll come back, we'll have drinks. When. When, I mean. When you save the world."

Buffy nodded and Clem continued. "It's gonna be great with all the. Rocking. Maybe. Maybe you should just get out of town this time," he suggested.

"Yeah. I probably should," Buffy sighed.

"You take care of yourself, OK?" He waved. "Bye," Clem said, and moved forward with the traffic.

Buffy began walking again.

Willow sat beside Xander on the hospital bed and held on to his hand. Buffy stood near her, talking to Xander. "And that you should expect to see some bruising when you remove the bandages. Bruising around the. Area. The, uh, bone structure and musculature was hit pretty hard."

"Ok," Xander said.

"Um, also they said that the, the meds may cause you some stomach discomfort, so we're gonna have to be careful with your diet," Buffy continued.

"I can't taste anything right now anyway. I keep waiting for my other senses to improve 50%. Yeah, they should kick in any day now."

Buffy smiled. "Well, we're looking at a possible release as early as tonight. Um, we're just waiting for your labs to get back, and Dr. Kallet said that should be a couple of hours."

"That's great," Xander answered.

Buffy nodded. "Ok. Um, I think we're all caught up then." She looked at Willow and raised the file folders in her hand a bit. "Thank you for this. This was, um, really great work."

"Oh," Willow said, disappointed. "I thought we were gonna." She looked at Xander, then Buffy. "There were gonna be card games."

"Oh, no, I just. I should really get back. I want to get everyone started on this. I think we're really close to something."

"It's OK. It's gotta be done. And I might see you tonight, without depth perception, of course, but still." He smiled, and Buffy left.

Willow squeezed Xander's hand. "So I guess you're stuck with me then, huh?" she said with false cheer. "Let's order some cherry-flavored off-brand gelatin, and then I think we'll be up for a rousing game of"

"I might need a parrot," Xander interrupted.

"Huh?"

"Well, to go with the eye patch, to really complete the look. I think I still have that costume from Halloween."

"Yeah, and don't underestimate the impact of a peg leg. Maybe the hospital can hook you up with a nice one. Maybe they have a 2-body-parts for the price of one kind of deal."

"Oh, you know what the best part is? No one will ever make me watch _Jaws 3-D_ again."

"Yeah, and." Willow tried to smile. "You'll never have to." She stopped again and squeezed Xander's hand harder as she tried not to cry.

Xander sighed when he looked at her. "Oh, Willow. Please don't."

Willow looked at her lap and struggled to get her feelings under control.

Anya lectured the potentials while Andrew stood ready at an easel full of paper with a marker.

"And so we know that a battle is coming. Ubervamps galore. We also know that the ubervamps are hard to kill," Anya said.

"Hard to kill," Andrew repeated slowly, writing the words in red.

"But I have been out talking to some of my old contacts, and they've provided some surprising bits of news. Yay for them!"

Andrew drew a picture of a Turok-Han.

"Uh, ok. For example, ubervamps can be staked. Right through the heart. Zing. Poof."

Andrew wrote "steak," then corrected himself.

"Just like regular vamps. Um, we didn't know this."

Andrew drew a red arrow from the word "stake" to the torso of the ubervamp drawing.

"Of course," Anya continued, "These guys have incredibly strong sternums, so it's a lot like driving a wooden stake through solid steel. But you guys are all super-strong, right?"

"Um, no," Rona said sarcastically.

"Right. OK. Um, but still, heart information, still good to know since holy water seems to run off these guys like they've been scotch-guarded. And, well, sunlight would work, but guess what, they're not coming out during the daytime."

Andrew flipped to a clean sheet of paper and drew a yellow smiling sun.

"Uh, also, beware of their, uh, teeth and the claws they use to shred flesh." Anya raised her hand, fingers spread like she was clawing and shredding while Andrew wrote "teeth" and "claws" on the paper.

"OK, you know what?" Rona said. "I used to be really afraid of these ubervamp guys. But then the scary preacher blew into town, and now I'm mostly terrified of him."

Anya flipped through her note cards. "Right, well, um. We're working on getting info on that guy."

"Why bother?" Amanda asked. "Nothing works. Nothing will."

Anya shuffled her cards again. "Ok, I know you're all upset, and I, myself, would much rather be sitting at the bedside of my one-eyed ex-fiancé than killing time here with you people. And I would be, too, if not for a certain awkward discussion he and I recently had following some exciting and unexpected breakup sex."

Some of the girls screwed up their faces in disgust while Andrew wrote "breakup sex" on the pad and underlined it.

"But," Anya said, "I need to give him some space, so I'm doing what I can do, contributing any way I can. And so will all of you. You still need to know this information. We can't stop just because something else is trying to kill you, too."

Buffy walked into the conference room that held the computers and other research material. Jo, Blair, Dawn, and Kennedy were there. "Hey."

Dawn hopped up. "Hey, Buffy, how's Xander?"

"He's doing really well. He's ready to come home, I think." Buffy smiled and put the folders down on the table. She opened the top one.

"What'cha got?" Jo asked.

"Info that Giles and Willow were able to pull off the police database. We figured with Caleb's, you know, overt religiosity thing if we wanna learn more about him, let's find out where he's been."

Jo read from the file. "'Incidents of violence and vandalism connected to California religious institutions in the last 10 years.' Looks like this gives us a place to start."

"Yeah. I figure we start with California," Buffy said. "We don't find anything there, we'll expand the search. But a guy like Caleb didn't just get in the game. He's been playing for a while, and I wanna know where. Whatever it takes." She looked at Dawn. "You good to help?"

"Well, I was gonna do lots and lots of homework, but darn the luck, they went and canceled school, so looks like I got the time."

"Good," Buffy said, and handed Dawn a folder.

"I can help," Blair volunteered, and Buffy handed her a folder.

Dawn sat and put the folder in front of her. She turned around. "Hey, Buffy, how was Xander's mood, you know, exactly? And did you get a chance to talk to the doctor about the meds? Because it seemed like,"

Jo noticed Buffy staring at the floor, and interrupted Dawn. "Hey, sport, why don't you go get some of the stuff you've already gotten from Giles?"

"Or, um, we can talk about this later, maybe," Dawn said.

Buffy answered without looking up. "Ok."

"Yeah, I'll be right back," Dawn said, and left the room.

"Try to find anything that looks like Caleb, his church, his ring," Buffy said.

"His ability to render a Slayer useless in just one punch," Kennedy snarked.

Buffy looked up, finally, hurt by the remark, and Jo frowned.

"I didn't," Kennedy began. "That was stupid. I don't know why I said that, especially since I was the second one down."

Buffy looked away again, trying to quash the tears that were trying to start again. "Uh, it's OK. Um, you know, I, I have to go to the school to pick up the rest of my stuff."

Kennedy stood up. "I really didn't mean."

"It's fine," Buffy lied. "Really, it's fine. Don't worry about it. Hey, uh, isn't Anya doing that thing today?"

"Yeah," Kennedy sighed. "It was depressing the hell outta me."

"Your choice, Anya or research," Buffy smiled tentatively. "I'll be back soon." She looked at Jo. "See that everyone gets started on this."

"Yeah," Jo answered without looking up as Buffy left.

Buffy left and Blair put her hand on Jo's arm. "What am I looking for?"

Jo sketched Caleb's ring on the folder. "That for starters. And Caleb, he's, uh."

"Tall, sandy hair, blue eyes, southern accent," Kennedy supplied and pulled a folder from the pile.

"And desecration of churches in a non-Satanic way. You know, no inverted pentagrams or 'hail Satan' graffiti. Just torn up, and the occupants slaughtered," Jo added.

"What did I miss?" Dawn said.

"Nothing," Kennedy said.

"Where's Buffy?"

"She said she was going to get the rest of her stuff from the school," Jo said.

"I never thought I'd miss school," Dawn sighed. "This makes geometry look fun." She took and started going through the papers.

Buffy walked through the empty halls of Sunnydale High, past the cleaned-out lockers to her office. She sat at her desk and picked up a small, framed picture of she, Willow, and Xander in a group hug during their high school days. Buffy touched Xander's face tentatively and sniffled.

"Oh, now, look," Caleb drawled, making Buffy look up to see him standing on the other side of her desk. "Things don't go exactly your way, so here come the waterworks. Ain't that just like a woman?"

Buffy got up quickly. **"**Get out of here," she ordered.

"Now, now, little girl. Manners. I do imagine that firebrand tongue of yours has inflamed many a man, weak as they are." Caleb looked around. "This here's a, uh, public school, ain't it? Kinda deserted. Only just, I suppose. Folks work so hard at keepin' the Lord out, and look what happens in return."

Buffy backed toward a filing cabinet while Caleb continued to talk. "He abandons you."

Buffy quietly slid one of the drawers open.

"Not that He could do you much good now, anyway." Caleb turned to see Buffy trying to get something from the cabinet. "Ah, ah, ah," he said condescendingly "Wouldn't do that were I you, swee'pea. Fightin' back didn't do you much good last time, did it? And how is poor, sweet Xander? Let him know he's in my prayers, and any time he's willin', I'm ready to finish the job," he concluded, making a poking gesture.

"Go near Xander again, and I will end you," Buffy vowed.

Caleb flipped Buffy's desk over and walked toward her. "Mind your manners. I do believe I did warn you once. You're angry, frustrated, scared. I like that in a girl. You really should relax a little. Look at where you are. History's gonna look back at you, at me, at this place, and they're gonna see the glory. Great things are happenin' now, right here. This school, the seal. It's all gonna be a part of the great sweepin' tide of change, and you're gonna be a part of it. Now, why would you wanna miss that? More importantly, why would you want to get in its way?"

"I guess I'm just ornery," Buffy scowled, and punched Caleb in the face.

Caleb laughed. "Oh, I knew you'd be a wild one."

Buffy tried to kick him, but he grabbed her leg and pushed her down. She kicked his shins, and he picked her up from the ground by her neck. "I'm gonna take such sweet pleasure in taming you," he said, and threw Buffy through the office window.

She slammed into the wall and slid unconscious to the floor.

"I'll see you soon, little lady," Caleb said, and walked away.

Dawn handed a file to Giles. **"**OK, well, here's the one that stood out. It's, um, a mission up north in Gilroy."

Giles looked at the picture. "I don't see anything."

"Exactly," Dawn said. "No vandalism at all."

"Then why is it in the file?"

"The place was abandoned. Um, locals started noticing after a few days that no one was going in or out. 6 members of the order lived there, but when the cops showed up, all gone. Unsolved."

"Oh."

"Oh?" Dawn repeated. "Oh, good?" she asked hopefully.

"Not sure," Giles answered. He got up and started going through boxes.

Dawn handed him a magnifying glass. "Here."

Giles took it and examined the photo. "Dawn, what do you see?"

"What am I looking for?"

"On the back wall. A knothole."

Through the magnifying glass, Dawn saw an imprint of what looked like Caleb's ring in the wood on the wall next to a statue of Mary. "That's not a knothole."

"Would you go to the bar and get Spike?" Giles requested.

While she was gone, Andrew wandered in. Everyone ignored him as he sighed and slumped into an empty chair.

Spike walked into the room, Dawn behind him. "What's up, Rupert?"

"Spike, I have a mission for you."

"Oh, really? 'Cause, you know, sometimes our missions end up with you trying to kill me. I'm not fond of those."

"This is bona fide, with real ramifications. Take a look at this." Giles handed Spike the photo and magnifying glass.

Spike looked for a few seconds and spotted the mark on the wall. "Looks like our boy's been here. You want me to go check it out?"

"I need someone who can take care of themselves in case Caleb has left some souvenirs."

Spike shrugged and headed for the door.

"I'm bored," Andrew whined.

"Take Andrew," Giles called to Spike.

Both Spike and Andrew said, "WHAT?"

"Well, you are always saying you wanna get out of the house more," Dawn said.

"Yeah, but," Andrew started.

"There may be demons lurking about. You never know. He's a demon expert. He can help."

"Oh, please," Spike said.

"Well, he can bring his pan flute thing along. Excellent. Off you go." Giles pushed Andrew out of the chair, and Andrew reluctantly followed Spike.

*****  
>"Hey. Guys, how's it," Buffy stopped and looked around the empty conference room. "going?"<p>

"Buffy." Giles looked up from the book in his hands. "Are you hurt?"

"Oh." Buffy paused, then realized how she must look. "Caleb came back looking for seconds."

"My God, is h-he?"

"Still able to make me see cartoon birdies all around my head? You betcha. The short lack of consciousness was nice. I feel rested." She sat near him and groaned. "So how did those police files work out? Were they helpful?"

"Uh, uh, yes. Very much so, I think. Um, there's evidence that Caleb may have established a foothold up north."

"That's great."

"I, um, I sent Spike to look into it." He sipped from the mug of cold tea on the table.

"Spike? Is this a mission from which you intend Spike to return alive?"

"Yes." Giles returned the mug to the table. "I sent Andrew with him."

"Again I ask the question."

"Buffy, you weren't here. Decisions have to be made in your absence."

"Yeah, well, those are the ones that have been scaring me."

"I did what I thought was right."

"You sent away the one person that's been watching my back. Again."

"We're all watching your back," Giles responded indignantly.

"Funny, that's not really what it feels like." Buffy stood up.

"Buffy."

"Where is everybody?"

"What?"

"Jo, Kennedy, the girls. Where are they?"

"Jo and Kennedy are patrolling. I imagine the others are in their rooms, or the gym. Perhaps the arcade."

"At least somebody follows instructions," Buffy said snidely, and left the conference room.

In the wine cellar at the vineyard Caleb spoke with the First in Buffy's body. "You know what I figured out tonight? Every high school in this country, from one end to the other, smells exactly alike. Now, why do you suppose that is?"

The First walked out from the shadows. "And how was our best girl?"

"They always think they should put up a fight."

"Did you lay the proper groundwork?"

"That I did. Reckon she got the message, even if she doesn't know it yet. So now the big strong slayer goes back to those girls. She's just so ready to walk them right into it. And all we have to do is give her that one final gentle nudge," he concluded, his hand going through the First's chest.

"Excellent."

Sunnydale's streets were deserted. Jo and Kennedy walked steadily, alert for any sound, but there was none.

"The vineyard was a clusterfuck," Kennedy said.

Jo sighed. She agreed, but she'd heard the potentials talking earlier. The mess at the vineyard made it clear to them what they were up against, and they were frightened, as well as angry at Buffy for dragging them into it.

"We can't keep doing shit like that."

"What's your suggestion, Einstein?"

That shut Kennedy up.

Andrew rode behind Spike on his motorcycle, an old football helmet on his head. "You sure you don't wanna stop and pick up some burgers or something, you know, road trip food?"

"It's not a road trip. It's a covert operation."

"Right. Right. Gotcha." Andrew paused. "I, I bet even covert operatives eat curly fries. They're really good."

Spike rolled his eyes before answering. "Not as good as those onion blossom things."

"Ooh, I love those."

"Yeah, me, too."

"It's an onion. And it's a flower. I, I don't understand how such a thing is possible."

"See, the genius of it is you soak it in ice water for an hour so it holds its shape. Then you deep-fry it root-side up for about 5 minutes," Spike explained.

"Masterful."

"Yeah. Tell anyone we had this conversation, I'll bite you."

"Right," Andrew agreed nervously, and they continued to speed along the empty road.

Jo saw Buffy first. "Yo, B."

"What?" Buffy answered crankily, but waited for the other Slayers to catch up to her.

"Where you headed?"

"Hospital."

"You all right?" Kennedy asked.

"No," Buffy said flatly.

"Then you can take a number," Kennedy answered.

"What's your problem?"

"You." Kennedy started to move toward Buffy, and Jo grabbed her arm.

"Let her go," Buffy told Jo, who ignored her. "You got something to say to me?" Buffy asked Kennedy.

"No, she doesn't," Jo answered for her.

Buffy turned toward Jo. "I suppose you have an opinion."

"I told you, it's your Hellmouth. I'm just visitin'."

"Were you trying to get us all killed?" Kennedy demanded.

"I'm trying to keep everyone safe."

"Then why'd you drag us to the vineyard?"

"Ken, shut up."

"How safe were they when you dragged them off to meet Caleb? How safe was Rona or Amanda or Molly?"

If Jo hadn't been holding on to Kennedy, she would have gone down when Buffy punched her. Kennedy shook Jo off and swung at Buffy, who grabbed her fist and spun her around. She shoved Kennedy toward Jo. "Head back to the hotel, Willow and I will be there soon." Buffy walked off without waiting for an answer.

Kennedy snapped to attention and saluted at Buffy's back. "Sir, yes sir," she said.

Jo shoved her a little. "Just cause she's bein' an asshole doesn't mean you have to."

"Why are you on her side?"

"I'm not on anybody's side. I just want to get this over with so I can go home." Jo turned around. "C'mon, there should be welcoming committee."

Spike pushed open the creaky front door to the mission. Andrew stood nervously behind him. Spike sighed and walked in, Andrew on his heels.

"No one's here," Andrew said. "These kinda places make me feel funny inside."

"I'll buy that. You and me got something else in common after all," Spike answered.

Someone jumped out of a closet as they walked past, grabbed Andrew, and pushed him against the wall.

"Spike!" Andrew squealed.

Spike pulled the robed man off Andrew and got a punch in the face in return. They traded a few blows before Spike shoved him into the wall. The man slid down it, and Spike pushed his hood back. On his face was a burn mark in the shape of Caleb's ring.

Willow and Buffy stayed beside Xander, giving him support as they entered a hastily cleared conference room. A banner with "WELCOME HOME!" in big red letters hung on the wall opposite the door. Everyone except Spike and Andrew were there to greet them.

"Oh, god," Xander said as he looked around.

"We didn't have time to do more," Kennedy said. "You have to pretend there's a big party here."

Dawn went to Xander and gave him a long hug.

"Welcome home, Xander," Buffy said. "I wanted you to be here for this. I think you'll be interested in what I found out."

"What did you find out?" Willow asked hesitantly.

"It, it's about the cellar. Look, I know that night wasn't fun for any of us. But I figured out some things about that place, and I realize now what we have to do."

Giles looked at her warily.

"We're going back in," Buffy said.

Spike and Andrew stared at the robed man, and Spike bent down to get a better look at the scar on his face. "Tell me about the mark."

"Oh." The monk covered his cheek with his hand.

"Hey! Are you part of Caleb's faction?" Spike demanded.

The monk shook his head. "No! No!"

"Then tell me what happened."

"I c-can't.

Andrew bent down so his face was level with the monk's "'Can't' is a 4-letter word! I'm Andrew. I'll be your bad cop this evening." He stood. "You don't start singing, my associate here"

"We're trying to fight him. Caleb. We need your help," Spike said.

"You can't fight him. You can't stop him. You can only run."

Andrew bent over again. "'Run' is a four-letter wor. A three-letter word." He stood up again.

Spike stood, too. "Talk."

"I'll do better. I'll show you." The monk took the hand Spike offered and got to his feet. "One night," he began, and picked up a candelabrum, "some time ago, a man arrived at our doors."

"And you said, 'come in, do some damage'?"

"We are. We are a benevolent order, and, yes, we welcomed him. We offered to feed him. But he had come for something else." He walked up to a statue of Mary in an alcove and touched a secret lever. The statue swung out. Behind it was a secret compartment.

"Behind this, he revealed something even we didn't know was here. A secret room." The monk entered it, Spike and Andrew behind him. "He was excited, talking the whole time. Destiny, that sort of thing."

"Yeah. We hear he's a real smooth talker," Spike said.

The monk removed a tapestry from the wall. Behind it, words were written on the wall. "He was going on about this ancient inscription."

"Neat," Andrew commented.

"He read it. And he didn't like what it said. His temper. He was the purest evil I've ever seen. He burned his mark upon me. And then I ran and I hid. And I listened to the others die."

"Running away saved your life," Andrew told the monk.

Spike took the candelabrum from the monk and walked up to the inscription. "What does it say?" He looked at it, taking in Latin words in Greek letters: _Non tibi est. Ei solae tractare licet._

"It is not for thee," Spike translated. "It is for her alone to wield."

"Look, I know what you're thinking," Buffy said, "but I had a visit at the school today from Caleb."

"Buffy, why didn't you," Dawn asked.

"I'm fine. I mean, it wasn't fun, but I'm fine. I'm better than fine. I, I figured something out. He kept making all this noise about the school."

"Is it that seal again?" Willow asked. "Do we need to try shutting it again?"

"No, that's just it. We've spent all this time worrying about the seal and the Hellmouth. Why isn't Caleb guarding them? Why doesn't he have someone there protecting it? Why is he camped out at the vineyard? The bad guys always go where the power is. So if the seal was so important to Caleb and the First, they would be there right now. They're protecting the vineyard or something at the vineyard. I say it's their power, and I say it's time we go in and take it away from them."

Xander shook his head and looked down. Giles uncrossed his arms and sighed.

"Or, in the alternative, how 'bout we don't?" Jo answered. "I mean, it's a neat theory, B, but I'm not going back in that place, not without proof, and neither should you and neither should they."

"I'm not saying it's gonna be easy," Buffy replied.

"I think Jo had the floor," Kennedy said.

"Maybe it ends OK the way you wanna play it, but maybe it doesn't. And right now, I don't think I want you playin' the odds," Jo said.

"Did you come here to fight?" Buffy demanded.

"Listen, we're fighters, all of us, but you gotta give me something to fight, something real, not."

"Windmills," Giles supplied softly and looked at Buffy.

"There is something there," Buffy insisted.

"Maybe," Giles said. "But we can't be sure of that. This is a hell of a lot to ask."

"Too much," Kennedy added.

Buffy looked around nervously. "I, I don't understand this. For seven years, I've kept us safe by doing this, exactly this, making the hard decisions. And now, what? Suddenly you're all acting like you can't trust me?"

"Didn't you say to me today you can't trust us? Maybe there's something there that should be addressed," Giles said.

"Is that why you sent Spike away, to ambush me?"

Giles rolled his eyes and sighed. "Oh, come on."

"You know what?" Rona asked. "I am sick of your deal with this Spike guy. This isn't about him. This is about you. You're being reckless."

Buffy stepped back as if she'd been hit. "What?"

"You are! I don't even know you, and I can tell! You are so obsessed with beating Caleb, you are willing to jump into any plan without thinking," Rona said.

"That's not what I'm doing," Buffy said through gritted teeth.

Kennedy stood and walked up to Buffy. "Well, that's how it feels to us. People are dying."

Willow got up and went toward Kennedy. She said her name softly.

"Why are you always standing up for her?" Kennedy snapped at Willow.

"I'm not," Willow said sadly.

"What do you mean, you're not?" Buffy asked, shocked.

"With everything that's happened, I'm worried about your judgment."

Buffy looked around. "Look, I wish this could be a democracy. I really do. Democracies don't win battles."

Xander looked away when Buffy tried to catch his eye.

"It's a hard truth, but there has to be a single voice," Buffy continued. "You need someone to issue orders and be reckless sometimes and not take your feelings into account. You need someone to lead you."

"And it's automatically you," Anya said calmly and looked at Buffy. "You really do think you're better than we are."

"No, I"

Anya didn't let her finish. "But we don't know. We don't know if you're actually better. I mean, you came into the world with certain advantages, sure. I mean, that's the legacy. But you didn't earn it. You didn't work for it. You've never had anybody come up to you and say you deserve these things more than anyone else. They were just handed to you. So that doesn't make you better than us. It makes you luckier than us.

"I've gotten us this far," Buffy protested.

"But not without a price," Xander said.

"Xander," Buffy pleaded.

"I'm trying to see your point here, Buff, but I guess it must be a little bit to my left." He shook his head. "'Cause I just don't."

"Look, I'm willing to talk strategy, OK, I'll hear suggestions on how to break this down, but this is the plan. We have to be together on this or we will fail again."

"We are clearly demonstrating that we are not together on this!" Giles retorted.

"Which is why you have to fall in line!" Buffy ordered. "I'm still in charge here."

"Why is that, exactly?" Rona asked.

"Because I'm the Slayer," Buffy answered.

"And isn't Jo a slayer, too? And Kennedy?"

"What?" Jo squawked. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. So not what I meant. I'm not in-charge-chick. I think B here needs to just chill out for a little bit. But I'm not the one you want."

"Maybe we need a vote," Kennedy said, "to see who wants Jo to have a turn in charge."

"No," Buffy said sternly.

"No, what?" Kennedy asked.

"No. You don't get to vote until I've had my chance to pal around. See, I didn't get this was a popularity contest. I should have equal time to bake them cookies, braid their hair."

"Learn their names?" Jo said.

Buffy laughed. "You're just lovin' this, aren't you?"

"You have no idea what I'm feeling," Jo said.

"Come in here, take everything that I have," Buffy snarled at Jo. "You tried it before. Did you tell them that?"

"Buffy, that's enough!" Giles said sharply.

"I didn't come here to take anything away from you. I came here to beat the other guy, to do the right thing, however it works. I don't know if I can lead. But the real question is, can you follow?"

"So we vote," Kennedy said.

"Wait. Guys," Buffy said, and looked around the room again.

Anya's arms are crossed over her chest, her mouth small and tight. Willow didn't meet Buffy's eyes.

"I can't watch you just throw away everything that." Buffy stopped, and looked at Xander and Dawn, neither of who would meet her gaze. Buffy held her head up. "I know I'm right about this. I just need a little. I can't stay here and watch her lead you into some disaster."

Dawn stood up and walked to Buffy. "Then you can't stay here," she said softly. "Buffy, I love you, but you were right. We have to be together on this. You can't be a part of it. So I need you to leave."

Buffy looked around, then walked out of the conference room.

"Ding dong, the witch is dead," Rona cheered.

"Shut your mouth," Dawn told her in a low, angry voice.

Jo followed Buffy, and caught up to her in the lobby. "Hey. Look, I swear I didn't want it to go this way."

"Don't," Buffy answered.

"I mean it, I"

Buffy cut her off. "Don't be afraid to lead them," she said, crying silently. "Whether you wanted it or not, their lives are yours. It's only gonna get harder. Protect them, but lead them." Buffy walked away again.

Jo watched her leave, then returned to the conference room.


	18. Chapter 9B

When Jo returned to the conference room, discussion was in full swing.

"Power to the people? You sound like a child of the seventies," Giles said.

"What we're saying is we're in charge in charge of ourselves," Kennedy answered.

Jo tried to intervene. "Ok, you guys, let's just try not to freak out."

"All I'm saying is now that Buffy's not here, we finally have some say in how and when we lose our necks," Kennedy said.

"Maybe you don't have to be so blunt about the losing of the necks bit," one of the potentials said, making a cutting motion across her throat.

"No," Anya said emphatically, "let the girl speak the truth. We're all on death's door repeatedly ringing the doorbell like maniacal Girl Scouts trying to meet the cookie quota."

Xander shifted in his seat. "You know, I'm thinking that everyone here shouldn't have a say."

"We just have to find some way of having constructive dialogue without going completely mad," Giles said.

"Do you know the parliamentary procedure?" Amanda asked. "'Cause that's a convenient way of organizing"

Giles ignored the discussion for a few seconds to reassure Dawn. "She's going to be fine," he said softly. "Really, it's for the best."

"Yeah?" Dawn answered. "Then why do I feel like this?"

"I hear what you're saying, but," Jo said.

"Shouldn't we get down to business?" Kennedy asked.

Willow rolled her eyes. "You guys, I think we're wasting time arguing about how to argue."

"Well, why don't we," Amanda began.

Vi turned to her. "Please do not mention parliamentary procedure."

"I second that," Caridad mumbled.

Jo let out a loud whistle. "Everyone, listen to me. Just stop, all right? It's been a long night, and I don't know about you, but I'm wiped out. Maybe we should catch some sleep and figure all this out in the morning."

"Do we really have time to waste?" Kennedy asked.

"Look, I understand you guys are stressed," Jo told them. "Frankly, our situation blows. We've got to stay cool. That's the only way we're going to get through this. Can everyone handle that?"

Murmurs of assent rippled across the room.

"Great. Off to bed, we'll meet here after breakfast." Jo dropped into a chair and massaged her temples. She felt hands on her shoulders and tilted her head back. Blair dug her thumbs into the base of Jo's neck, and Jo leaned back.

After a few minutes, the room was nearly empty. Giles, Willow, Dawn, and Kennedy remained.

"Do you have a plan?" Giles asked.

All of Blair's work was immediately undone and Jo sat up. "I don't even know what the hell just happened."

Buffy wandered away from downtown in shock. Everyone she loved, everyone she relied on, turned against her. Xander, she could understand a little. She and Giles were in the middle of one of their regular battles of will. But the betrayal of trust by Dawn and Willow cut the deepest. When Jo was the only one to come after her, and to apologize, Buffy began to shut down.

Habit sent her toward her home. The neighborhood was abandoned except for the last family putting their necessities in the minivan. Buffy walked down the street alone, arms crossed. She approached a random house, entered, and looked around.

A man came up to her, his shotgun raised. "Don't move," he yelled. "Get out of my house."

"Hey," Buffy said, and removed the shotgun from his hands with a sigh. "I thought the place would be empty. I was looking for a place to crash. You know, you really should leave."

"You can't just kick me out of my own house," he answered indignantly.

Buffy shrugged. "Why not? It's what all the cool kids are doing nowadays." She walked into the kitchen. "This is not your house. It's not your town. Not anymore." She opened the refrigerator. "Got any Tab?"

Andrew and Spike waited out the day in one of the mission's interior rooms. Andrew was obviously bored. " I spy with my little eye something that begins with a T."

"Tapestry," Spike answered, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, good one. How did you?"

"Tapestry's the only thing in the whole bloody room."

"Ah, so say you, but I say look deeper."

"I'll look deep into your jugular is what I'll look at," Spike threatened.

"Don't spaz out."

"I'm not." Spike glared at Andrew. "Don't say another word."

"Rock, paper, scissors?" Andrew suggested.

"What's the matter with you? Don't you understand what's happening?"

"Uh, yeah. We're waiting here 'til it's night again so you can ride on your motorcycle without exploding."

"And every minute we're stuck here, the Slayer's out there facing hell knows what."

"Come on. What's the worst thing that could happen to her?"

"All right. So, what do we know?" Jo looked around the conference room.

"Well, we know we're basically the last humans left in Sunnydale," Xander said.

"And that all the evil in town wants us dead," Caridad added.

"I don't want to die," Vi said.

"Don't worry," Anya answered. "It's far more likely you'll live long enough to watch most of your friends die first." She looked at Vi. "And then you'll die."

Kennedy said, "We also know that Caleb told Buffy that everything's going down at the seal. I think we should head"

Jo cut her off. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves. So, we know we've got a lot of enemies. We'll start there."

"Jo, I'm sorry," Kennedy began.

Jo interrupted her again. "I got this, OK? So let's go over our rogues' gallery. Who exactly do we have here?"

"Well, there's the First, who we can't touch," Dawn began.

"Then there's our friend the reverend I-hate-women," Xander continued.

"Who's basically untouchable," Anya added.

"There's the 'roid-rage vamps, who are pretty much the worst," Dawn said. "And the"

"Bringers," Jo concluded. "I think they're our weakest link."

"Are you thinking of attacking the Bringers?" Giles asked.

"Maybe. Or, ok, we could kidnap one."

"And what? Hold it ransom?" Kennedy sniped.

"Yeah, I'll get the magazines and start ripping out the letters now," Xander said sarcastically. "'Dear Mr. First, if you want your Bringer back, well, we'll be surprised because you got, like, three million of them. So please disregard this letter. Yours sincerely'."

"I'm saying we think about getting us a Bringer and making it talk," Jo explained. "Find out info on the First and Caleb that way."

"How do you think we should catch one if they don't want to be found?" Giles asked.

"OK, I'm not sure this is such a good idea," Kennedy said. "Why try and get information when we already know about the seal? Why don't we send a team to the high school? Do some recon and"

"No," Jo said firmly.

Kennedy slouched back and raised her eyebrows. "Just like that? You're not even listening."

"Ken, you're pushing too hard," Willow said softly.

"I thought things would be different now, but you keep shutting me down," Kennedy complained.

"Things are different, because now," Jo said, standing, "I'm your boss. Look, I'm not Buffy. I'm not the one who's been on your asses all this time, you made me your leader, which means I go first, and I make the rules, and the rest of you follow after me. Is that clear?" Jo turned toward Kennedy and pointed "So, Kennedy, back the hell off, and let me do my job, all right?" she said calmly. When there was no answer, Jo said, "Ok, let's get down to business."

Caleb and the First, in Buffy's form, watched Bringers clustered around a stone in the cave under the vineyard. The Bringers wielded pickaxes and welding torches.

"I was hoping you'd bring me some better news," the First Evil said to Caleb.

"And I wish we had some."

"Is this going to do anything? Or is all of this just to make the Bringers sweat? Do the Bringers sweat?"

"Actually, I think they pant, like dogs," Caleb answered. "And I don't know if this is going to do any good, but we have to try everything."

"You realize what will happen if the Slayer and her girls get it, don't you?"

"They won't."

The First looked at Caleb. "That's right," it said. "They won't." It walked away. "Because you're going to kill all of them and everyone they know."

"Hallelujah."

Kennedy walked down the alley alone, looking at the ground and pouting. A Bringer came up behind her wielding a knife, but Giles lassoed him around the neck and pulled him to the ground. He tied up the Bringer as the potentials helped Kennedy fight off the other Bringers who appeared, seemingly from nowhere.

After Kennedy killed the last Bringer, she stood up. "I've never been the bait before. That was, uh, actually, kind of scary."

"We had your back," Caridad reassured her.

"You did well," Giles told her. "Your performance as a disgruntled minion was spot on."

"I'm method," Kennedy smiled. She went to Giles and they lifted the Bringer to his feet. "Let's get this back to the captain."

Dawn looked up when she saw Giles enter the conference room. "Oh, hey. So?"

"Uh, the Bringer's dumb."

"You were expecting, what, a Rhodes Scholar?" Anya asked.

"Dumb as in mute," Giles clarified.

"Someone ripped out its tongue," Jo added.

"Oh, gross," Amanda groaned.

"Hey, I've been reading this old Turkish spell book," Dawn said. "There's an old conjuration that the ancient Turks used to communicate with the dying."

"Oh, yeah. I think I've read a translation of it," Willow said.

Dawn looked at her, wide-eyed. "There's a translation of it?!" She sighed. "I'm over it. Um, so the spell is used to communicate with people who can't talk. Um, like if a person was dying, this spell would let them say their good-byes or, you know, gripe about how nobody came to visit them. Would this help us with Mr. No-Tongue?"

"Yeah, I think so. I just need to get together a few ingredients."

"All right," Jo said. "While Willow does that, the rest of us can"

"We're back!" Andrew yelled from the lobby as Spike entered the conference room.

"Spike," Giles said.

"Hey," Spike answered.

Andrew entered the room, holding the football helmet. "Hi, everybody. I missed you guys a lot. Sorry it took so long to get back from our mission-mission, but we had to wait out the sun. Well, I think our mission went very well. We, uh, we rode on Spike's hog, which was very cool, and, uh, uh, played some amusing games, and. Oh! We got some new information. You know what? I really need to urinate," he finished, and left the room.

"He's a breath of fresh air, isn't he?" Spike said, rolling his eyes. "Thank god I don't breathe. So, I think we got a lead. Where's Buffy?"

"Um," Dawn stalled and looked away. "She's not here right now."

"When's she get back?" Spike asked.

Willow walked toward Spike, wringing her hands nervously. "Uh. While you were gone, we all got together and t-talked out some disagreements that we were having. Um. And eventually, after much discussion, Buffy decided that it would be best for all of us if she took a little time off, a little breather."

Spike stared, his disbelief obvious. "Uh huh. I see. Been practicing that little speech long, have you?"

Willow ducked her head and walked away.

"So, uh, Buffy took some time off right in the middle of the apocalypse, and it was her decision?" Spike asked.

"Well, we all decided," Xander answered.

"Oh, yeah. You all decided." Spike chuckled. "You sad, sad, ungrateful traitors. Who do you think you are?"

"We're her friends," Willow protested. "We just want"

"Oh, that's ballsy of you," Spike said. "You're her friends, and you betray her like this?"

"You don't understand," Giles started.

"You know, I think I do." Spike looked at Giles. "Rupert. You used to be the big man, didn't you? The teacher all full of wisdom. Now she's surpassed you, and you can't handle it. She has saved your lives again and again."

The others in the room rolled their eyes and looked away from Spike.

"She's died for you," Spike continued. "And this is how you thank"

"Hey. Why don't you take it down a notch or two?" Jo demanded. "The time for speech-giving is over."

Spike crossed his arms and looked at Jo. "Oh, is that right?"

"Yeah, that's right. Save your lack of breath," Jo answered.

"All right," Spike shrugged and punched Jo.

"You're pretty sweet on her, aren't you?" Jo asked, and kicked Spike in the face. "I think it's cute."

Spike punched Jo again, and she punched him back.

"The way she's got you whipped," Jo continued, and kicked Spike into the hallway.

Spike hit the wall and slid down it.

"Enough!" Giles roared.

Jo ignored him and went into the hall after Spike. She punched him in the face several times. He kicked her off and quickly got to his feet.

"Finally got what you wanted, didn't you?" Spike said while trading punches with Jo. "Where is she?"

"I don't know," Jo answered.

Spike rolled Jo over his back and threw her into the wall. She got up, and she and Spike stared angrily at each other for several seconds before Spike turned for the lobby.

While Giles and a few of the others dealt with the Bringer, Jo set the potentials to organizing, cleaning, and sharpening the weapons cache. Then she went in search of Blair. She found her in the kitchen and watched her until Blair noticed her.

Blair didn't say anything. She removed her apron and put it on a counter as she walked toward Jo. "There's ice in the bar," she said.

Jo nodded. Blair took her hand cautiously and gently pushed her out of the kitchen. They went to the bar. Blair put Jo on a stool and ducked under the counter. She grabbed some towels and folded ice into the center of one.

"Give me your hand," Blair prompted.

Jo switched the hand under her chin, and Blair put the impromptu ice pack on it.

"Anything else?"

Jo shook her head.

"You gonna say anything?" Blair asked.

"I fucking hate this."

"Me too."

"Spike just threw a temper tantrum."

"Spike?"

"Oh, I forgot, you haven't seen him. Smartass peroxide blond vampire. Has a thing for B."

"What was his problem?"

Jo sighed. "He's pissed off about what happened with B."

"Oh."

Jo looked at Blair for the first time. "I don't wanna be in charge," she said softly.

"You didn't want to be a Slayer, either."

"You're not helping," Jo grumbled softly.

Blair chuckled and ducked under the bar. Jo turned on the stool, and Blair came to a halt standing between her legs. She put her arms around Jo and kissed her. "You're doing fine," she reassured Jo.

Jo brushed Blair's hair away from her face, nodded, and rested her forehead on Blair's shoulder.

Blair kissed her head. "You're doing fine," she repeated.

The captured Bringer was duct taped to a chair in one of the smaller conference rooms. Giles, Kennedy, Xander and Andrew stood and watched while Willow performed the spell.

"Speak to us," Willow commanded, and looked up from the book in her hands.

"Maybe I should rough him up a little," Andrew suggested.

"Andrew!"

"Quiet!"

"I don't know, guys," Willow said. "That should have worked." She and Giles stared at the Bringer.

In a soft monotone, Andrew said, "I am a drone in the mind that is evil."

"Could you just shut up?" Xander asked.

"I say I'm part of the great darkness," Andrew continued in the same tone.

Kennedy rolled her eyes. "Somebody needs a reality check."

"Or a muzzle," Xander said.

Giles looked at Andrew. "Wait."

"I'm only a fragment of the we," Andrew went on, speaking for the Bringer. "We work as one to serve the First."

Xander and Kennedy backed away from Andrew, but kept their eyes on him. Giles and Willow just stared.

"OK, what do you - the we - do for the First?" Willow asked.

"We work to prepare for the inevitable battle."

Kennedy grabbed the Bringer's knife from the table and held it to the Bringer's throat. "How? Tell me exactly what the Bringers are doing."

"Kennedy, he can't see the knife," Giles pointed out.

"We can feel the knife."

"Kennedy." Giles held out his hand and she gave him the knife.

"We attend to the needs of the infinite evil. We exterminate girls and destroy the legacy of the slayer. We build an arsenal beneath the dirt. We obey the commands of our teacher Caleb."

"Wait. Could we go back to the dirt thing?" Xander asked.

"We build weapons to prepare for the coming war. At the farthest edge of town. We are everywhere. We are like the ocean's waves. We watch your efforts and are not scared. We will laugh at you as you die."

Giles slit the Bringer's throat.

"What the bananas?!" Andrew squawked. "You are so lucky that you did not just magically decapitate me."

"We've got enough here," Giles said. "We need to get Jo in on this. Xander, gather some maps. We need to find a subterranean space large enough to house an armory."

Andrew followed the others from the room. "I feel used and violated, and I need a lozenge," he complained, hand at his throat.

Spike walked away from the hotel. Buffy, like everyone else, was a creature of habit, and like any injured animal would seek out its lair, he reasoned, and set out for Revello Drive.

He checked her house first, and was surprised to find it empty. He stood at the end of the sidewalk and inhaled deeply, eyes shut so he could concentrate. When he caught her scent, he turned in that direction.

It didn't take him long to find her. He knocked on the door of the house she was in, and went inside when there was no answer. Spike went directly to the room she was sleeping in and stood in the doorway. "There you are," he said, without greeting. "Do you realize I could just walk in here, no invite needed? This town really is theirs now, isn't it?" Spike walked to the bed. "I heard. I was over there. That bitch," he sighed. "She's all about smiles and helping when you're on your feet, but the moment you're down, she's all about the kicking, isn't that right? Makes me want"

"It wasn't just Jo," Buffy said quietly, staring into a corner. "It was all of them." She looked at Spike. "And it's not like they were wrong. Please leave."

"No. This'll change your tune. I came here 'cause I got something to tell you. You were right," he said, excitement making his voice rise. "Caleb is trying to protect something from you. And I think you were spot on all the way. I think it's at the vineyard. So? You were right." When she didn't move or respond, he said her name.

"I don't feel very right."

Spike moved further into the room. "You're not fooling me.

"What do you even mean?"

"Well, you're not a quitter."

"Watch me."

"You were their leader, and you still are. This isn't something you gave up, it's something they took."

Buffy looked at him. "And the difference is?"

"We can take it back," Spike answered confidently.

In Blair and Jo's room, Giles and Jo talked over a map spread out on the table. "Sewer tunnel on the north side's closest, so guess we'll start there," Jo said.

"Sounds fine," Giles answered. "What time shall I tell everyone?"

"How about around 7:00?" She paused, for a moment. "7:00 sharp. So, tomorrow we fight."

"Tomorrow. Good night, Jo." Giles started to leave the room, then turned back to her. "Jo."

"Yeah?" She looked up from the map.

"You're doing just fine," he told her, and left.

Jo stood up and turned around only to see Catherine standing at the foot of the bed.

"I'd say better than fine. I'd say you're doing an excellent job."

"Get out," Jo ordered.

"I believe a 'hello' or a 'nice to see you' might be a little more welcome. It's the end of humanity, Joanna, not the end of courtesy."

"You're wasting your time. I know who you are, what you are."

The First Evil nodded. "No one's explained to you how this works, have they? You see, I am part of the First, as you call it, but I'm also myself."

Jo stared at her face. "I know what you're doing, and it's not going to work." She walked toward the door. "But feel free to keep talking, 'cause, I got all damn night to listen to you."

"Language, Joanna! You're a leader now. You need to set a good example for those girls."

"You let me worry about the girls."

"Of course. You're doing a great job with them, by the way. Much better than Elizabeth ever did. You were smart to kick her out."

Jo shook her head. "That's not what we," she started, and stopped when the thing that looked like Catherine raised an eyebrow. "Buffy got them this far."

"Why are you protecting her? Do you believe she cares about you?"

"It's different now," Jo said, shaking her head.

The First approached Jo. "No matter what you do, Buffy will always see you as a rival, someone she can't trust. She doesn't believe that you are worthy to be a Slayer. Now you have what she so desperately wants, the respect of these girls. Stay on your guard, Joanna. Buffy's dangerous. If you're not careful, she'll destroy you."

Buffy sat on the edge of the bed, with Spike standing in front of her.

"No?" he asked.

"No," Buffy repeated.

"You mean no as in eventually?"

"You really have problems with that word, don't you?"

"You can get them back," Spike insisted.

"Can, maybe. Should?" Buffy sighed and rubbed her forehead. "I'm just so tired."

"They need you."

"Well, I"

"It's bloody chaos over there without you."

"It is?" Buffy sounded surprised.

"Yeah! Yeah, it's, uh. There's junk. You know? Disarray, slovenliness, everyone's very scared and, uh, unkempt."

"Sounds dire," Buffy smirked.

"I didn't see a lot," Spike admitted. He sat beside Buffy. "I came, hit Jo a bunch of times, and left."

"Really? I mean, not that I'm glad, but."

"Oh, you say the word, and she's a footnote in history. I'll make it look like a painful accident," Spike promised.

"That's my problem. I say the word, some girl dies. Every time."

"There's always casualties in war."

"Casualties. It just sounds so, casual. These are girls that I got killed. I cut myself off from them. All of them. I knew I was gonna lose some of them and I didn't." She stopped, shook her head, and stood. "You know what? I'm still making excuses. I've always cut myself off. I've always," she sighed. "Being the slayer made me different. But it's my fault I stayed that way. People are always trying to connect to me, and I just slip away." She chuckled. "You should know."

"I seem to recall a certain amount of connecting," Spike answered cockily.

Buffy shook her head. "Oh, please! We were never close. You just wanted me because I was unattainable."

"You think that's all that was?" Spike asked angrily and stood up.

"Please, let's not go over the past." She sat on the bed again.

"Oh, no, no. Let's hold on here. I'm hummed along to your pity-ditty, and I think I should have the mic for a bit."

"Fine. The stage is yours. Cheer me up."

"You're insufferable."

"Thank you. That really helped."

"I'm not trying to cheer you up.

"What are you trying to say?"

"I don't know," Spike said. "I'll know when I'm done saying it. Something pissed me off, and I just. 'Unattainable.' That's it."

"Fine. I'm attainable. I'm an attain-a-thon. May I please just go to sleep?"

"You listen to me." Spike kneeled in front of her. "I've been alive a bit longer than you, and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine, and done things I prefer you didn't. I don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood, which doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain. So I make a lot of mistakes, a lot of wrong bloody calls." He looked into her eyes. "A hundred plus years, and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of: you."

Buffy looked away, and Spike gently turned her face back toward his. "Hey, look at me. I'm not asking you for anything. When I say, 'I love you,' it's not because I want you or because I can't have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You're a hell of a woman. You're the one, Buffy."

"I don't wanna be the one."

"I don't wanna be this good looking and athletic. We all have crosses to bear. You get some rest now. I'll check in before first light. You can decide how you want," he said, walking toward the door.

"Spike?"

He turned around.

"Could you stay here?"

"Sure." He looked at a chair. "That diabolical old torture device, the comfy chair." He took off his jacket. "It'll do me fine."

"No, I mean here." Buffy touched the bed.

Spike nodded and sat beside her again. He put his arm around her, and Buffy curled up on him, leaning into his chest, and he raised his arm to her shoulder, and held her head with his other hand.

"Deep down, you always wanted Elizabeth to accept you, to love you even. Why do you think that is?" the First Evil as the shade of Jo's murdered Watcher asked.

"Bullshit," Jo answered.

Catherine paced. "You keep looking for love and acceptance from these people, these friends of yours, but you will never find it."

"Get out."

"They'll forever see you as a quitter."

"I said get out," Jo snarled.

"I'll always be with you Joanna, in everything you do. I believe in you," Catherine said, and disappeared into a flash of light.

Blair touched Jo's shoulder. "Jo?"

Startled, Jo whirled around. "You shouldn't sneak up like that. I almost took your head off!"

"Am I supposed to knock?"

"Who? What did you see?"

"Just you, sweetheart. You look spooked. What happened? Are you sure you're all right?"

"No." Jo rubbed her hand over her face.

"What happened?" Blair asked again, and steered Jo to sit on the bed.

"The First was here."

"You've seen it before."

"It was Catherine."

"I'm sorry," Blair said, and rubbed Jo's back. "That must have been awful."

"I knew it was a trick, but it was her. Nobody else ever called me by my full name unless I was in trouble. She was wearin' one of those tweedy suits," Jo sighed. "She said I should watch out for B."

"Watch out?"

"She said B's dangerous. To me." Jo snorted.

"Well, what do you think?"

"I don't know." Jo leaned over, put her elbows on her knees, and dropped her face into her hands. "She could be, I guess. We've given her a good reason to be pissed off." Jo sighed again. "You know the messed up thing? The First is telling me to worry about her, and I just wish she was here. In a couple hours, I'm gonna lead these girls into some serious crap, and she's the only one"

"She's not the only one, Jo. You're a Slayer, too."

"Yeah." Jo sat up. "And we see what it's gotten me. What if I'm wrong, Blair? What if"

Blair covered her mouth. "Stop, sweetheart. If you don't believe, how can you expect the others to?"

Jo nodded, and Blair moved her hand to Jo's cheek. She leaned in and pulled Jo over into a kiss. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Jo answered.

"Shower with me?" Blair asked.

Jo nodded. Blair stood up and pulled her shirt off. Jo stood up then, her attention caught, as always, by Blair's body. She kissed her, reaching around to unfasten her bra, then between them to unbutton and unzip Blair's jeans. She pushed the material down, making sure to hook her thumbs in Blair's panties so all the fabric slid to the floor at once.

Blair returned the favor, breaking their kisses only long enough to pull Jo's shirt off.

"Shower later," Jo said, and pushed them onto the bed.

Willow unlocked the door and walked into the room looking at a map.

"Giles said Jo wants us to start early in the morning."

"Yeah." Kennedy lounged on her bed in something small and silky.

Willow looked at her and gulped. "Nice. Uh. Nice whatever that is."

"Glad you like it. C'mere."

Willow blinked several times, trying to settle on one train of thought. Kennedy got up and went to her. She took the map from Willow's hands and tossed it on the dresser, then put her hands on Willow's waist, leaned in, and kissed her.

Willow was still trying to clear her thoughts, and when she didn't respond, Kennedy stopped. "Something not right?" she asked.

"No. No, I just, uh, guess I'm a little scared."

"It's probably stupid to ask why, huh? Death, war, apocalypse."

"Me. I'm just scared that if we. And then I'll. And then."

"And then?" Kennedy chuckled, and stroked Willow's hair. "Isn't that the good part?"

"Good. Yeah, g-good feeling, but also…"

"Bad stuff, like unrestrained moaning and screaming with joy?"

Willow finally met Kennedy's eyes. "Well, sort of. The unrestrained part. But I've just, I've kind of been in this space where I should be restrained. I've been controlling myself and I, if I lose that control, let myself go, I could just go."

"Hmm," Kennedy said, stroking Willow's cheek. "You worried you're gonna turn into big bad Willow?"

"It's not stupid. You don't know."

Kennedy cut her off. "It's not stupid, but it's not gonna happen," she said with quiet conviction. "I just want you to know you're safe with me."

"Yeah?" Willow asked hopefully.

"You can float around, and I'll tether you down," Kennedy smiled.

Willow tentatively smiled back. "You'll be like, like my kite string?"

"Mm-hmm. You'll be a kite, and I'll be your kite string, ok?"

"Ok," Willow nodded.

"Ok," Kennedy agreed, and kissed her again. This time, Willow moved to meet her.

Anya and Xander sat on one of the beds in their room, a container of ice cream between them. "I'm going to smack Willow," Anya said crossly. "She didn't have to put our room between hers and Jo's. They could show a little respect, you know." She scooped up some ice cream.

Xander took the spoon from her. "Hmm."

"I mean, they should at least acknowledge the fact that some might not want to listen to an a capella concert of people, you know," she paused to take the spoon back from Xander after he got a bit of ice cream. Anya finished what he dipped out. "Moaning and groaning."

"Hm," Xander repeated, and took the spoon again.

"Disgusting is what it is."

Xander ate some ice cream. "Little jealous, huh?"

Anya relieved Xander of the spoon again. "Of course I am. I'm a lot jealous. I mean, if we're done having sex, then I think other people should just knock it off." She emptied the spoon and looked at Xander, then tossed the spoon and put the ice cream on the nightstand before kissing him passionately.


	19. Chapter 10A

Once upon a nail there hung a picture  
>A little piece of perfect in a frame<br>One day luck went out the window  
>And all the magic blew away<br>Nothing left now but bones and shadows  
>The last words all but faded out<br>Who is left to remember  
>To whistle in the dark<br>When the fire burns out?  
><em>Precious Faith<em>

* * *

><p>In the wine cellar, the First, wearing Buffy's form, stared without focusing. "I envy them. Isn't that the strangest thing?"<p>

Caleb said from behind it, "Well, it does throw me a tad. I mean, they're just. Why, they're barely more than animals. Feeding off each other's flesh, it's nauseating. But you. You're everywhere. You're in the hearts of little children. You're in the souls of the rich. You're the fire that makes people kill and hate. The fire that will cure the world of weakness. They're just sinners. You are sin."

"I do enjoy your sermons."

"And you're in me. Give me strength no man can have."

"And the only man strong enough to be my vessel, and I know you feel me, but I know why they grab at each other. To feel. I want to feel. I want to wrap my hands around some innocent neck and feel it crack."

"Amen."

Buffy woke up and looked around, remembering after a moment the night before. She looked at Spike for several seconds, then slowly disengaged from him.

"So, it turned out that all these stone tablets basically said the same thing," Andrew told the assemblage in the conference room. "The First and Caleb are protecting something, and, and we don't know exactly what it is, but it's something powerful, and they don't want the slayers to get it. I'm thinking it could be a weapon, and if we're looking for an arsenal."

"You're not coming," Jo said.

"If one is looking for an arsenal," Andrew answered, irritated, "what better place to find a"

"Weapon," Jo finished. "Got it. Good. Good thinking, Andrew."

"It's a pleasure, Jo. Back to you."

"Get your gear and wait in the lobby," Jo told the potentials. After they left, she addressed Willow, Dawn, Xander, and Giles. "Ok, I need you four to find B. You don't need to talk to her or get in her way or even let her know you're there. Just do a little recon."

"What are we looking for? I mean, is there some reason we should spy on Buffy?" Dawn asked.

"We're just making sure she's ok," Jo answered. She walked over to Blair, leaned over, and kissed her. "We'll be back soon."

"Be careful."

Jo nodded and left the room. The potentials milled nervously around the lobby. "Those of you who are coming with me to the arsenal, you know who you are. Everybody ready? Let's do this thing." She walked out of the lobby, a group of armed potentials following her.

Caleb and the First Evil, still wearing Buffy's form, walked beside each other in the wine cellar.

"Shouldn't be long now. Prophecies say one thing. Brute strength says another. We'll get it out."

"I heard you, Caleb."

"We're almost there."

"Yes, that's true. Now, rouse the Bringers. Get them back to work."

A Bringer flew down the stairs and landed on the ground in front of them. Caleb and the First turned to see Buffy at the top of the stairs with her hands on her hips.

"Hey," she said cockily. "Heard you got something of mine." She hurried down the stairs toward Caleb.

"Well, if it ain't the prodigal slayer?" he drawled.

Buffy looked around. "Where's it at? You know I'm gonna find it sooner or later."

"No, you're not. I lay one hand on you, and you're just a dead little girl."

Buffy shrugged. "Lay a hand on me. If you can."

Caleb took a swing at Buffy, who ducked quickly. She avoided Caleb's next punch by doing a forward somersault over him, and the one after that, with a somersault on the ground. She stood and ran, and Caleb took off after her. She ran over the wine barrels, and kicked the last one into Caleb's path. He tripped over the broken pieces and landed in the mess on the floor. Buffy stood and smirked at him.

The First sat on a wine barrel and looked at him. "Caleb, this is getting embarrassing."

"Do you have to look like that?" he muttered.

"Will you concentrate?" the First said sharply.

Through gritted teeth, Caleb said, "'Cause it's just a little confusing."

"Fine. Go. Kill." It disappeared and Caleb finally got to his feet and went after Buffy.

Buffy leaped into the air and flipped, causing Caleb to miss her again. He became angrier with each miss, and Buffy continued to avoid him. She ran toward the back of the wine cellar.

"You whore!" Caleb bellowed at her back.

Buffy stopped running and turned to face him. "You know, you really should watch your language. If someone didn't know you, they might think you were a woman-hating jerk."

Caleb pushed over a wine barrel and charged Buffy, who looked over her shoulder, and saw a hatch in the floor because light came up from it. She grinned, ducked another punch, and slid across the floor and through the hatch. Its door slammed shut behind her, and she heard wine barrels roll across it.

She walked into the small cave and stared for a moment at what she saw there. Buffy walked up to the rock where the Bringers had been working. Stuck inside it was a weapon. At one end of the shaft was a point, while the other had a wide, rounded blade. Buffy stared at it for a few seconds, and smiled as she approached it.

Caleb opened the hatch and came down into the room. Buffy turned to look at him.

"So you found it," Caleb said. "Not impressed. 'Cause the question now, girly girl, is can you pry it from solid rock before I come over there."

Buffy grabbed the handle and pulled the weapon from the stone without effort. She looked at it.

Caleb watched, shocked. "Darn," he said worriedly, and exhaled. "Now, before you go hurting yourself with that thing, why don't you do yourself a courtesy and hand it over now?"

Buffy cocks her head to the side. "Yeah? You want it?" she asked, and casually hoisted the weapon.

Caleb smiled nervously. "You don't even know what you got there," he said, and took a step back.

"I know you're backing away."

"You think wielding some two-sided doo-dad's gonna make a difference?"

The First, still looking like Buffy, appeared behind him. "Let her go, Caleb." When he hesitated, it said, "I said, let her go."

"If I let her go, she slices me open with that thing."

"No, she doesn't. She hasn't got time. She has friends. And her friends are in trouble. Go boom."

"I'm not letting her out of here with that thing," Caleb said.

"Sure you are. Then you'll come back for it later. When she's got her back turned," the First said.

Buffy ran from the cellar carrying the weapon. Caleb and the First watched her go.

* * *

><p>Jo led the potentials through a dark tunnel. They had flashlights, but they didn't help much. Jo pointed her light at a stockpile of weapons and gas canisters. "Everybody stop. I think we just found it."<p>

"Look at all this," Kennedy said.

"I don't get it," Vi said, and pulled a sword form the pile. "Why'd they abandon all this stuff?"

A Bringer jumped down from the rafters.

"Maybe because they didn't," Jo said, and pulled her sword free just in time to run a Bringer through.

Jo, Kennedy, and the potentials fought the Bringers by whatever means they could. Swords were most efficient, as they kept the Bringers at a distance, reducing the damage they could do.

Finally, the attack ended. Jo stood and looked around. Dead Bringers were everywhere on the floor, but the potentials, even those who were injured, were still standing.

"Is that it?" Vi asked. "I mean, not that it wasn't fun."

"Jo," Kennedy called. "Check this out." She shined her flashlight at something in the corner.

Jo walked over to investigate, and found a doorway that opened to a set of stairs. Everyone followed her down the stairs, and Jo took Kennedy's flashlight when thy reached the bottom. She walked over a plank that crossed a small waterway and saw a padlocked box.

Jo kicked the padlock and broke it. She bent over and opened the box to find a timer connected to bricks labeled C4 High Explosive. The timer showed 0:08. Jo slammed the lid, jumped back, and screamed, "Everybody get down!"

The box exploded in a massive fireball, and the concussion sent bodies flying everywhere. Dust hung in the air, making it harder to see as the girls began to move. Amanda found a flashlight and got to her feet. "Hey! Hey, Jo! Anybody! Is anybody here?"

"Me," Caridad coughed, and stood.

"Is anybody else alive?" Amanda yelled.

"Hello? Anyone?" Caridad called.

"I'm," Vi coughed, and stared again. "I'm here!"

Amanda and Caridad went to the corner where Vi crouched and helped her to her feet.

"Who else we got?" Caridad asked.

"Don't know," Vi answered.

"You ok?" Amanda asked Vi as they helped her walk.

"I think my arm is broken." Vi stared at the girls lying unmoving under rubble. "I guess I'm lucky."

"Where's Jo?" Kennedy asked as she stood.

"I don't know," Vi replied.

"Find her," Kennedy ordered.

"Maybe we should get the hell out of this place," Caridad said. "They could"

"Find her," Kennedy repeated emphatically.

Amanda and a couple other girls pulled Jo's unconscious body from the water.

"Oh, God!" Vi said, and turned away.

"Is she alive?" Kennedy asked.

"Breathing. Pulse," Amanda said.

"We gotta get her out of here," Kennedy said.

"Which way is out?" Vi asked.

"There's other girls," Amanda said. "There's more than Jo. We don't even know how many of us are still alive."

Everyone turned toward the sound of a growl

"What was that?" Caridad asked.

"It could've been grinding metal," Vi suggested. "It could've been"

"No," Kennedy said. "It was one of them."

"That's not possible," Caridad stated.

"How'd it get in here?" Amanda asked.

"Plans?" Vi requested.

"Run," Kennedy instructed.

The girls exited the room where the explosion happened and tried to escape down the tunnels they came in.

"Oh, no! It's blocked!" Caridad said.

"Oh, my God!" Vi cried, at the edge of hysteria.

"I told you this wasn't the way!" Amanda reproved.

"Cut the chatter!" Kennedy yelled. "Up and over! Wounded first! Let's go!"

The girls climbed over the debris blocking the tunnel, but it was a slow process with so many wounded. Vi was the last one over the pile, and barely missed being grabbed by a Turok-Han. The girls screamed and backed away as they watched it climb over the pile and move toward them.

"Group together," Kennedy ordered. "Form a circle. Nobody panic. It's all of us, one of him. We can take one of these things."

* * *

><p>While the girls stared at the ubervamp coming over the pile of debris, another jumped down the steps beside them.<p>

Giles looked up when Xander, Anya, Willow, and Dawn entered the conference room. "Did you find Buffy?"

"No," Xander said.

"But you did that spell with the little lights," Andrew said. "The locator."

"It crapped out on us, though," Anya said.

"No, it didn't. Exactly," Dawn said.

"It just took us to an empty house. She must have moved on all ready," Willow answered, frowning.

"I'm afraid we have slightly worse news here," Giles said. "Jo hasn't returned with the other girls. Something's gone wrong."

"I've been here, keeping morale up. Because that's important."

The others ignored him.

"We have to go to her," Willow said, her voice tight with worry.

"Guess so," Xander nodded.

"Yes. I'll stay here, keep working on that morale thing," Andrew said as the others left.

"Remember the training," Kennedy instructed, and raised her fists." Everybody, get ready!"

A Turok-Han sneaked up behind her and knocked her down

"There's another one," Amanda said.

Kennedy got away from her attacker and backed away from it. "Move! Move! Move! Up and over!"

"Not that one!" Amanda told Kennedy, pointing toward another uber vamp. "That one!"

The girls all screamed as the three Turok-Han advanced toward them. They grabbed one of the girls.

"Weapons!" Caridad pointed. "Over there!"

Kennedy ran to the weapons, but the Turok-Han were already ripping apart the girl they grabbed. One looked at Kennedy, snarling, its face covered in the girl's blood. It charged toward Kennedy. She swung the sword at it, but it easily disarmed her. It grabbed Kennedy by the neck and lifted her off the ground.

A loud crash echoed through the room as something fell through the ceiling. Light came in through the hole, and Buffy dropped into the room, carrying her new weapon. The ubervamp dropped Kennedy and stalked toward Buffy.

Buffy swung the weapon at the Turok-Han as it approached her, and quickly staked two of them with its pointy end. The third ubervamp knocked her down, but Buffy tumbled forward, grabbed her weapon, got to her feet, and beheaded it.

The girls watched her incredulously. Kennedy, panting, held her neck.

"Get the wounded," Buffy told the. "We're leaving."

"Are there more?" Kennedy asked.

"There's always more. Let's move." She walked away, and the others scrambled to follow.

* * *

><p>The lobby became an impromptu triage unit. The healthy girls treated those injured in the explosion.<p>

"Will, come here," Buffy said. She sat beside one of the wounded potentials. "She's losing a lot of blood."

"Got it," Willow answered, and went to the girl.

Giles and Xander carried in Jo, who was still unconscious. Blair looked up, and her gut knotted.

"Take her to her room," Buffy said, and started looking around.

Blair put the final piece of tape on a girl's leg and stood up. "Stay here," she told her charge, and followed Xander and Giles. "Don't hit her head," she said sharply as they narrowly missed the wall.

"I'll be up in a second," Buffy said.

"She gonna be ok?" Kennedy asked anxiously.

"I don't know," Buffy answered.

"What's with the axe thing?" Caridad inquired.

"I took it from Caleb. It might be important."

"Let's hope."

"I think we got punished," Amanda said.

"What?" Buffy picked up an unopened first aid kit and turned to look at her.

"We, uh, we followed her," Kennedy said nervously. "And it was"

"It didn't work out," Vi stated.

"You guys, it was a trap. It's not her fault. That could've just as easily happened to me," Buffy responded.

Vi shook her head, and Caridad said, "So are you? Are you, like, back?"

"I don't know," Buffy said. "I guess I'm not leaving." She carried the first aid kit and her new weapon, and went toward the stairs.

"So, we got a plan now, or anything?" Kennedy asked.

"Yeah, there's a plan," Buffy answered. "Get ready. Time's up."

"I still think we got punished," Amanda muttered.

The Slayers ignored her and took the stairs two at a time. Buffy knocked on the door, and Xander immediately opened it. Giles watched Blair clean Jo's face with a washcloth. Buffy tried to hide her shock as she put the first aid kit on the bed.

"Is she breathing ok?" Xander asked.

Blair nodded.

"She's still unconscious, though," Giles said.

"We've still got work to do," Buffy told them. She put her hand on Blair's shoulder. "She'll be all right," Buffy told her, even though she wasn't certain it was true. Kennedy went to the bathroom and returned with two more warm, damp washcloths. She offered one to Blair, who traded the one she'd been using.

Buffy looked at Giles. "We need to talk to Willow."

He nodded, and they left. Xander stayed by the door.

Downstairs, Andrew tore apart a sheet to make bandages. "I liked the real bandages better, but at least we won't run out of these."

"And they're white. If we were still at Buffy's house, they'd look mortally wounded Easter baskets," Anya answered.

"What?" the potential whose shoulder Anya was bandaging asked, her alarm coming through her grogginess.

"Aw," Anya shrugged, and swigged from a bottle.

"H-hey! We're supposed to use that to sterilize wounds," Andrew protested. "Mr. Giles said."

"Come on, what does it really matter?" Anya handed the bottle to Andrew.

"Hmm. Good point," he answered, and swigged from the bottle.

"Giles knows his single malt antiseptics," Anya observed.

"Blech." Andrew shook his head. "Everything's horrible."

"Yup," Anya agreed. "Many of these girls will die. Slaughterhouse is what it is."

"What?" the potential repeated, alarmed.

"Oh," Anya said sweetly, "trying to talk will just kill you sooner."

"We need supplies, and not just bandages and junk. These, these girls need stitches and painkillers."

"Yeah, well, I could use a cookie, but I'm not making reckless wishes," Anya retorted.

"No, no. We can do it. The hospital. It's gotta be all abandoned like everything else. Supplies just lying around for the taking." Anya shrugged while Andrew stood up. "I'm going in," he said, and swigged from the bottle again.

"You are?" Anya asked while she stood.

"And you're coming with me," Andrew said decisively.

"I am?"

"Well, I think you should drive 'cause that scotch made me a little dizzy."

Anya smiled. "Ok. I'll get Kennedy to watch the girls. She's tough. Imminent death won't bother her."

The potential sat up this time, truly alarmed. "What?"

* * *

><p>Buffy and Giles hijacked Willow into the manager's office. Buffy held the weapon so they could see it. "I think it's maybe some kind of scythe. The only thing I know for sure is it made Caleb back off in a hurry."<p>

Willow giggled. "So it's true. Scythe matters." She pushed Giles playfully.

"And, ignoring that, I'd just like to point out this is really quite ingenious." He took it from Buffy and examined it, checking its balance and the tools at either end.

"Kills strong bodies 3 ways," Buffy said.

"And you say you sense something when you hold it?" Willow asked.

"Not much, but it's strong. And I knew it belonged to me. I just knew it."

"In addition to being ancient, it's clearly mystical," Giles observed.

"Yeah, I figured that one out when I King Arthured it out of the stone."

"So maybe it's like some kind of traditional slayer weapon," Willow suggested.

"I can't imagine how something like this could exist without my having heard of it," Giles said.

"Well, the good guys are not traditionally known for their communication skills," Buffy answered.

"Right. Um." Giles sat on the desk. "Any chance that it might be something other than a tool for killing things?"

"The First's guys clearly wanted it out of that stone. It's not just a tool. It's important. We need to find out whatever we can. Who made it, when, why? Does it have a name?" Buffy shrugged. "I don't know, a credit report? Just find out fast."

"We'll start work immediately," Giles reassured her.

"Yeah, don't worry, Buff. We'll find out everything there is to know," Willow agreed.

"Good, because right now, that thing's all we've got going for us."

Buffy and Xander stood in the hallway outside Jo and Blair's room.

"You got it?" Buffy asked quietly.

"Wait. I'm not to the 'got it' place yet. I'm still in the neighborhood of 'you've gotta be kidding'."

Buffy sighed. "You know it's for the good."

"I don't. Buffy, do you get that? If I do this, that's it for me for this fight. I feel like you're putting me out to pasture."

"Of course I'm not putting you out to pasture." She shook her head. "What does that even mean?"

"Well, you know, it's like, uh, when a cow gets old and loses an eye, or its ability to be milked, the farmer takes it and puts it in a different pasture so it won't have to. Fight. With the priests." Xander chuckled. "Look, I don't need you to protect me."

"I'm not."

"I got hurt, but I'm not done. I can still fight."

"I know. That's why I need you to do this. Xander, I need someone that I can count on no matter what happens."

Xander shook his head. "I just always thought that I would. I would be there with you. You know, for the end."

"Hey!" Buffy said indignantly.

"Well, not that this is the end," he said quickly.

"Thanks a lot."

"No, no, no. By the end, I meant, uh, a heroic, uplifting way. See, I'm still optimistic. You're just thrown off a little by this gritty-looking eye patch."

Buffy smiled. "I know what you meant."

"I should be at your side. That's all I'm saying."

"You will be. You're my strength, Xander. You're the reason I made it this far. I trust you with my life. That's why I need you to do this for me."

"OK," Xander acquiesced.

"Also, you can't shoot a bow and arrow anymore, and every time you pick up a sword, I worry that you're gonna break one of our good lamps," Buffy joked.

"Hey," he protested.

"Don't look at me. You're the one who said I'm gonna die." She walked down the hall.

"I never said you were gonna die," Xander said, following her. "I, I implied that you were gonna die. It's totally different."

"Yeah, OK. Sure."

"Besides, if you die, I'll just bring you back to life," he shrugged. "That's what I do."

* * *

><p>"Shit," Jo groaned, a little after noon.<p>

"Don't move," Blair instructed.

"Don't think I can."

"How many fingers?" Blair asked.

Jo kept her eyes closed. "I hate that game."

"You'll hate it more if you have to play it with Dr. Hudson."

Jo opened one eye. "None."

Blair laughed and held up her hand.

"Two."

"Good. You know the rest."

Jo groaned again. "Can't you just give me some aspirin and let me sleep?"

"After this."

"Jo Polniaczek. Blair Warner. Sunnydale, California, one of the worst shitholes I have ever fallen into. Twice."

"Good enough," Blair decided. She got up and went to the bathroom, and returned with a glass of water and four aspirin. Jo leaned on one elbow to take them, then laid back and closed her eyes.

Blair put the glass on the nightstand and returned to her place beside Jo. She stroked her hair, relieved beyond words that Jo woke up and seemed fine. She'd overheard a little of what happened, and didn't want to hear the rest. Jo's conversation with her mother when she first returned to the east coast popped into her mind, and she realized that this was what Jo meant when she told them she hoped her job was never any more complicated than hunting vampires.

* * *

><p>Buffy's weapon leaned against the table beside Willow's computer in the conference room. While Willow researched on her laptop, Giles flipped through books.<p>

"OK, before the vineyard was just, you know, a vineyard, it was a monastery," Willow said. "Could've been put there then. Some creepy monks messing with powers they don't understand."

"No, it's older than that. It's pre-Christian," Giles answered, and scratched his head.

"OK. Well, I found reference to stories the monks used to tell about something older. Uh, like, some kind of pagan temple."

"Native American?"

"No. I don't know. Ugh. OK, maybe we're just going about this the wrong way. Maybe we should research the weapon itself. Like, look." She pointed at the screen. "Maybe it's the Axe of Dekeron, said to have been forged in hell itself. Lost since the Children's Crusade, where it was said to have killed." She sat back and made a face. "Oh. Children. I hope that's not it."

"Well, I have reference to the Sword of Moskva, the, uh, Reaper of the Tigris. How are we supposed to narrow this down? The illustrations are never clear enough." Giles got up and paced. "Oh, damn. We're running out of time. We really haven't got anything useful."

Willow stood and picked up the weapon.

"Do you sense any of the power that Buffy spoke about?"

"Gotta say no. Must be a Slayer thing."

"Tapping into magicks might help with that."

"Maybe. But, I mean, if Caleb is scared of this thing, it must be pretty dangerous. And tapping into that." Willow carefully put the weapon on the table.

"Willow, you could do it without endangering yourself."

"If I tried something big, I'd change," Willow said apprehensively. "And then it's all black hair and veins and lightning bolts. I can hardly do a locator spell without getting dark roots."

"And if it was necessary?" Giles asked softly.

"Honestly? I don't know." She returned to her computer.

Giles sighed. "All right. Do what you can. That's all any of us can do."

"I guess so. Ugh. Man, none of these sound right." She scrolled down the page. "I mean, look. Here's one that's just "m" question mark. What the heck is that?"

"Let me see." Giles came over and looked at the screen. "It's not a question mark. It's the international phonetics alphabet symbol for glottal stop."

"A whoey?"

"It's sort of a gulping noise. I'm remembering something here. Um. Ah. Hieroglyphs. Hieroglyphs stand for sets of consonants, as you know."

"Yes, absolutely."

Giles returned to pacing. "M plus glottal stop is represented by a picture that's commonly thought to symbolize a sickle or a scythe. It's in thousands of carvings. In Egypt, throughout the ancient world."

"Carvings like you'd have on a pagan temple?"

"Go back. See what else we can find out about this temple." Giles picked up the weapon. "The scythe is a symbol of death. Let's see where these pagans buried their dead."


	20. Chapter 10B

That evening, Xander and Dawn went through Xander's car, which he'd moved to the canopy in front of the lobby.

"Xander, my crossbow is not out here," Dawn said. "I told you, I don't leave crossbows around all willy-nilly. Not since that time with Miss Kitty Fantastico."

"Hey, did you know I have to take a driving test every year now?"

"Because you're old?"

"No, because of my eye. It's a whole state law. They don't trust my depth perception anymore."

"That sucks."

Xander stood. "And you know what's even worse? All the stupid 'it's all fun and games until someone loses an eye' jokes. 'Hey, Xander, so no more fun and games, huh?'"

Dawn rolled her eyes and sighed. "Giles was just having fun with you."

"That's not the point. It's an obvious joke. It'd be like someone calling me a cyclops."

"Oh." Dawn giggled, then stopped and cleared her throat. "OK, so not that funny."

"I mean, uh, give me some 'eye of the beholder' jokes. You know? Or, uh, some 'eye for an eye' jokes. Or maybe even a post-modern 'I, Claudius' joke, you know? It's about standards, Dawnie."

"I know." Dawn stood.

Xander sighed. "Just, uh, be creative."

"Look, everyone's still kind of on guard around you. But before you know it"

Xander put a cloth over her face, and held her with his other arm. Dawn screamed before she passed out. Xander pushed Dawn into the car and closed the door. He walked around the car, got into the driver's seat, and drove away.

* * *

><p>Enraged, Caleb threw a barrel across the room. It split open and gushed red wine onto the floor.<p>

"Not that I care personally, but you are wasting a lot of robust, full-bodied merlot," the First, still using Buffy's appearance, said.

"Why did you let her go? You know I can take her in a fight."

"We'll get her. Calm down."

"I'm calm. You should see me when I get angry."

"She's powerful right now. And you're weak."

"You know, all of a sudden, I'm getting less calm."

"Face it. Your strength is waning. It has been quite some time since we've merged."

"Maybe you're right. OK, let's do it." Caleb sniffed.

"Boy, you sure know how to romance a girl. No flowers, no dinner, no tour of the rectory. Just, "OK, I'm ready. Let's do it." Help me. My knees are weak." It rolled its eyes.

"Watch what you say now. You're starting to sound like her. This is a sacred experience for me."

"And for me as well. Look, when this is all over, and our armies spring forth, and our will sweeps the world, I will be able to enter every man, woman, and child on this Earth, just as I enter you."

"Are you trying to make me jealous?"

"I'm trying to make you a god."

The First and Caleb faced each other, both holding out their hands with heads leaning back. The First changed into a huge horned demon with glowing red eyes and lunged at Caleb, growling.

"I am thy humble servant," Caleb said.

The First contracted into a beach-ball sized glowing light and entered Caleb, who wobbled. He rolled his head further back and fell to the ground. When he sat up again, his eyes were black, his voice deeper and creepier. "And I live to serve thee," he said.

* * *

><p>Buffy knocked on the door and waited. Blair opened it a few moments later.<p>

"She awake?" Buffy asked.

"Yes."

"Why don't you go find something for both of you to eat?" Buffy suggested. "I'll stay with her until you get back."

Blair eyed the weapon in Buffy's hand and nodded. She stepped aside so Blair could leave the room, then entered.

"Hey."

"Hey," Jo answered.

Buffy laid the scythe across her lap. Jo picked it up, and her eyes opened wide.

"You feel it too, don't you?"

"Damn. And damn, that's something."

"I know."

"It's old. It's strong, and it feels like, like it's mine." Jo put it on the bed on the side nearest Buffy. "I guess that means it's yours."

"It belongs to the Slayer," Buffy answered and picked up the scythe.

"Slayer in charge, which, I'm guessing, is you."

Buffy sat on the bed. "I honestly don't know. Does it matter?"

"It never mattered to me. Somebody has to lead. Let's vote for Chao-Ahn. It's harder to lead people into a deathtrap if you don't speak English."

"It wasn't your fault."

"I blew it."

"You didn't blow it."

"Tell that to"

Buffy interrupted her. "People die. You lead them into battle, they're gonna die. It doesn't matter how ready you are or how smart you are. War is about death. Needless, stupid death."

"How do you stand it? Being alone like that, everybody looking to you for answers?"

"I love my friends. I'm very grateful for them. But that's the price. Being a Slayer."

"There's only supposed to be one. Maybe that's why you and I can never get along. We're not supposed to exist together."

"I don't know," Buffy said. "I kinda thought it was because you were an obnoxious ass."

"I was," Jo agreed. "But it was mostly because it was fun to piss you off," she smirked.

"I was an obnoxious ass, too," Buffy admitted.

"Was?"

They glared at each other for a few seconds.

"That's it, no shiny scythe time for you," Buffy joked.

"Didn't want it anyway," Jo shrugged. "When we're done here, I'll be outta your hair for good."

"As long as you leave a number where I can reach you."

"Deal." Jo held out her hand.

Buffy shook it. "Deal."

* * *

><p>Buffy met Spike in the stairwell.<p>

"Honey, you're home," he said.

"Yeah."

"And you did it. Fulfilled your mission. Found the Holy Grail. Or the Holy Hand Grenade, or whatever the hell that is."

"Right now we're going with scythe. You like?"

"Well, pointy and wooden is not exactly the look I wanna know better, but it does have flair. Can see why a girl would ditch a fella for one of these."

"I'm sorry about that." Buffy went down to the landing where Spike stood.

"It doesn't matter. You're back in the bosom. All's forgiven. And, uh, last night. Was just a glitch. A bit of cold comfort from the cellar dweller. Let's don't make a thing out of it," he finished nervously.

"Great. I have work to do."

"Oh, yeah. Another solo mission, of course."

"Yeah, it is."

"That's fine. You don't have to get shirty about it."

"I'm not shirty." She paused and looked at him. "And what is shirty? That's not even a word."

"All right. All right. Big secret mission. It's fine."

"It's not a secret. Well, I mean, it is, but that's the point of the mission. Find out the secret. This thing was forged by. I don't even know. I mean, something about. A tomb on unconsecrated ground. That's what I have to do. I need to find out what this is and why I have it."

"And that's the thing the preacher man was so anxious to keep out of your mitts?"

"That it is." Buffy looked at it again.

"Well, maybe I'll swing by the vineyard when you go, make sure he's sitting tight."

"Great."

"Ok." Spike turned to leave.

Buffy grabbed his arm. "You're a dope."

"I'm a what?"

"You're a dope. And a bonehead. And you're shirty."

"Have you gone completely carrot-top?"

"Do you see this?" She raised the scythe. "This may actually help me fight my war. This might be the key to everything. And the reason I'm holding it is because of you. Because of the strength that you gave me last night. Look, I am tired of defensiveness and weird, mixed signals. You know, I have Jo for that. Let's just get to the truth here, Ok? I don't know how you felt about last night, but I will not"

Spike took an unnecessary breath and looked away. "Terrified."

"Of what?"

He exhaled slowly. "Last night was." He looked up. "God, I'm such a jerk. I can't do this."

"Spike."

"It was the best night of my life. If you poke fun at me, you bloody well better use that, 'cause I couldn't bear it. It may not mean that much to you, but"

"I just told you it did."

He sighed again. Yeah. I hear you say it, but. I've lived for soddin' ever, Buffy. I've done everything. Done things with you I can't spell, but. I've never. Been close. To anyone. Least of all, you. 'Til last night. All I did was," he smiled, "hold you, watch you sleep. And it was the best night of my life. So, yeah. I'm. terrified."

"You don't have to be."

"Were you there with me?" Spike looked at Buffy.

She looked back, unflinching. "I was."

"What does that mean?"

"I don't know. Does it have to mean something?"

"No." He looked away. "Not right now."

"Maybe when," Buffy suggested.

Spike raised a hand to interrupt her. "No. Let's just leave it."

"Ok."

Spike sighed. "We'll go be heroes," he said, and started down the stairs again.

* * *

><p>Anya and Andrew entered another of Sunnydale Memorial's abandoned storerooms.<p>

"Ooh. This one has oxygen tanks," Andrew enthused, and shifted the bag on his shoulder.

"They'd only be useful if something big was attacking, and then we could shove one down their throat and blow 'em up like Roy Scheider did with that shark in Jaws," Anya said.

Andrew stared at her.

"What?" she asked irritably.

"You are the perfect woman."

"I've often thought so. Wanna rob?"

"Let's rob."

They walked to the shelves and started going through the contents.

"Oh, cool," Andrew said. "Gauze and alcohol. Tape and oh, sutures, if we want to get stitchy with it. Oh, and there's a, box of ointment here. I used one of these on a rash once."

"Oh. Show me."

"Well, it, it's healed up, but it was red and crusty with these little itchy places."

"Show me the box full of ointments, you little freak. And get cotton packing for the big wounds."

"It's gonna be bad, isn't it?" Andrew asked.

"Yeah," Anya answered resignedly.

Andrew sighed. "So how come you're here? I mean, you could just go. Right?"

"Yeah. I did once before."

"Before what?"

"Well, there was this other apocalypse. This one time, and. Well, I took off. But this time, I don't, I don't know."

Andrew sighed again. "Well? What's different?"

"Well, I guess I was kinda new to bein' around humans before. But now I've seen a lot more, gotten to know people. Seen what they're capable of, and," she shrugged, "I guess I just realized how amazingly screwed-up they all are. I mean really, really screwed-up in a monumental fashion."

"Oh." He nodded.

"And they have no purpose that unites them, so they just drift around, blundering through life until they die," Anya continued. "Which they, they know is coming, yet every single one of them is surprised when it happens to them. They're incapable of thinking about what they want beyond the moment. They kill each other, which is clearly insane. And yet, here's the thing. When it's something that really matters, they fight. I mean, they're lame morons for fighting, but they do. They never, never quit. So I guess I will keep fighting, too."

"That was kind of beautiful. You, you love humans."

"I do not!" she replied indignantly

"Yes, you do. You loooove them."

"Stop it! I don't love them! And I'll kill you if you tell anybody."

"I won't tell anybody. Won't get a chance to, anyway."

"I don't know. You might survive."

"No, you might survive. You know how to handle a weapon, and you've been in this world for, like, a thousand years. I'm not so," Andrew sighed. "I don't think I'll be OK. I'm cool with it. I think I'd like to finish out as one of those lame humans tryin' to do what's right," he smiled.

"Yeah," Anya nodded.

"So? Wheelchair fight?" Andrew suggested.

"You're on!" Anya put her bag on a shelf and pulled out a wheelchair.

* * *

><p>Buffy, scythe in her hand, walked through a cemetery. She opened a gate and kicked open the pyramid shaped tomb behind it. Torchlight flickered on the walls.<p>

"I'd forgotten," a woman's voice came from behind a drape. "I'd forgotten how young you would be." The drape opened, revealing an ancient woman with long white hair. "Comes from waiting. Mind plays tricks. I see you've found our weapon."

"Who are you?"

"One of many. Well, time was. Now I'm alone in the world."

"So what are you? Some kind of ghost?"

The woman chuckled softly while shaking her head. "Nope. I'm as real as you are. Just, well, let me put it this way: I look good for my age. I've been waiting." She held out her hands, and Buffy placed the scythe in them. "You pulled it out of the rock. I was one of those who put it in there."

"What is it?"

The woman admired the scythe for a few moments. "A weapon. A scythe. Forged in secrecy for one like you who. I'm sorry. What's your name?"

"Buffy."

"No, really."

Buffy shrugged.

"We forged it in secrecy and kept it hidden from the Shadow Men, who"

"Yeah. Met those guys," Buffy interrupted. "Didn't really care too much for 'em."

"Ahh, yes. Then you know. And they became the watchers. And the watchers watched the slayers. But we were watching them."

"Oh! So you're like? What are you?"

"Guardians. Women who want to help and protect you. We forged this centuries ago, halfway around the world."

"Hence, the Luxor Casino theme."

"Forged there, it was put to use right here. To kill the last pure demon that walked upon the Earth. The rest were already driven under. And then there were men here, and then there were monks. And then there was a town, and now there was you. And the scythe remained hidden."

"I don't understand. How is it possible that we didn't know any of this?"

"We hid, too. We had to until now. We're the last surprise."

"Does this mean I can win?"

"That is really up to you. This is a powerful weapon." She returned it to Buffy.

"Yeah."

"But you already have weapons."

"Oh."

"Use it wisely and perhaps you can beat back the rising dark. One way or another, it can only mean an end is truly near."

Her head moved slightly to one side with a cracking sound. She fell to the ground, and Buffy saw Caleb.

"I'm sorry. I didn't catch that last part on account of her neck snapping and all. Did she say the end is near? Or here?"

* * *

><p>When Dawn shifted in the passenger seat, Xander looked away from the road to check on her. "Hey, Dawn. Dawn, you awake?"<p>

"What happened?" she asked groggily.

"Um, I thought you might say that."

"Actually I meant to say what the hell happened?"

"It was chloroform."

"Color forms? What?" She struggled to make sense of what he said.

"Chloroform," Xander repeated. "Are you still loopy?"

"Sorry about that. Someone knocked me out with chloroform." She looked around. "Xander, where are we going? What's going on? Talk to me."

"Away," he answered, and handed her a letter.

"What's this?"

"Just open it."

Dawn opened the glove box so she could use the map light. _Dearest Dawn,_ she read, _don't be angry with Xander. He only did what I told him to do. This isn't the place for either of you. Please know that I love you and that everything I do is for you. I promised once to show you this beautiful world, and I'm going to do everything I can to make that happen._

'Damn it, Buffy,' Dawn thought, and raised her secret weapon. She pressed the stun gun to Xander's neck and fired. She grabbed the wheel, knocked the transmission into neutral, and let the car glide to a stop before putting it in park.

She freed Xander from the seatbelt and pulled him toward the passenger side. She had to get out and go around so she could move his legs. Once he was settled, she turned the car around and headed back to Sunnydale.

* * *

><p>Buffy swung the scythe at Caleb, but he grabbed it and pushed her away. She abandoned the weapon for the moment, keeping it in her grip while battling him with her natural skill. She ducked a punch, and Caleb's hand went through a stone pillar.<p>

Caleb laughed. "You're not slipping out of this fight, girl. Can't you see? You can't stop me. I can just keep going back for more. It's like being reborn."

Buffy swung the scythe at Caleb's head again, and their fight turned into a tug of war, which Caleb won. He threw it aside and went after her with his fists until she went to the floor.

"You know, I gave you ample warning. Told you not to interfere, but you chose not to heed," Caleb sermonized.

Buffy got up and charged him, but he brushed her aside, then picked her up and threw her into a pillar. He picked up the scythe.

"I was kind of hoping it'd go this way," he said smugly, and raised the scythe.

"Hey!" Angel yelled, and with one punch, knocked Caleb down. "I was never much for preachers," he commented.

"Angel."

"You look good."

"You look timely. And also good," Buffy smiled

"Heard maybe you needed a hand."

Caleb got up, and Angel moved to finish the fight. Buffy stopped him.

"Ah," he said. "One of those things you have to finish yourself."

"Really kinda is."

He backed out of the way and prepared to watch the show. Angel crossed his arms, licked his lips, and told Caleb, "You are so gonna lose."

Buffy and Caleb resumed the fight. Caleb took the weapon from Buffy and punched her. He charged her, leading with the spear end, but it jammed in the wall when he missed her. Buffy pulled it from the stone and kicked him away.

"God, I missed watching this," Angel commented.

This time, when Buffy swung the scythe, it sliced across Caleb's stomach. He stumbled back and laughed, wagging his finger at her, then fell to the floor.

"See?" Buffy asked Angel. "Under control."

"Well, at least you could tell me you're glad to see me," he answered, moving toward her.

Buffy dropped the scythe and walked toward him, and kissed Angel when they met.

Spike watched from behind a pillar, and the First, in its favorite form, whispered in his ear, "That bitch."

"Well," Angel grinned when the kiss ended, "I guess that qualifies as 'happy to see me.'"

Buffy smiled up at him. "Angel, what are you doing?" She shook her head. "Don't even. I just want to bask." She looked at him for a few more seconds, then snapped out of it. "Ok, I'm basked. What are you doing here?"

"Not saving the damsel in distress, that's for sure."

"Oh, you know me." She picked up the scythe. "Not much with the damseling."

"Got your share of distress, though." He walked to the wall

"You heard?"

Angel picked up a folder from a bench. "I got coverage on the whole thing. It's very gripping. It needs a third act."

Buffy shook her head. "You have to leave L.A."

"It's the First, right? The First evil. The power that tried to convince me to kill myself."

"Yeah. It's gotten a little more ambitious since then. It's raising an army."

"Yeah, well, it failed once, and I'm here to tell you."

He went flying across the room when Caleb hit him with a cat statue. Caleb walked to Buffy, black blood streaming from his eyes and nose. "Are you ready to finish this, bitch?" he snarled, and swung the statue at her.

Buffy blocked it with the scythe, then went after him with it, but Caleb used the statue to block it. He knocked her down and threw the statue at him.

Buffy bounced back up, holding the scythe. "Ok," she asked, breathing hard, "how many times to I have to kill you? Ballpark figure."

"You understand nothing," Caleb answered.

Buffy swung the scythe at him again, but he grabbed it and punched her, the lifted her in the air, pressing her back to the ceiling. She struggled unsuccessfully before he let her fall. He was slow getting to her, but still jerked her up by the lapels. "You think you have power over me?" he challenged through gritted teeth.

Buffy got loose and kicked him to the floor.

"Stupid girl," Caleb growled, and got up. "You'll never stop me."

Buffy twirled the scythe and swung the axe blade between his legs.

"You don't have the ba-" he stopped, shocked.

"Who does nowadays?" Buffy asked.

Caleb looked down and saw the scythe. Buffy pulled it up through his body.

Angel came to and got up. "Ok, now I'm pissed. Where is he?"

"He had to split," Buffy giggled.

"Yeah," the First whispered to Spike. "She needs you real bad."

Angel picked up the folder again and gave it to Buffy.

"I'll have the guys go through that. See if there's anything new. Reliable source?"

"Not remotely."

"Mm, any port in an apocalypse."

"I, uh, brought something else as well." He removed an amulet from his pocket and held it up for Buffy's inspection.

She looked at the crystal sunburst and shook her head. "I can all ready tell you, I have nothing that goes with that."

"It's not for you."

"Splainy?"

"I don't know everything. It's very powerful and probably very dangerous. It has a purifying power, a cleansing power, possibly scrubbing bubbles. The translation is, uh, anyway, it bestows strength to the right person who wears it."

"And the right person is?"

"Someone ensouled, but stronger than human. A champion. As in me."

"Or me."

"No. I don't know nearly enough about this to risk you wearing it. Besides, you got that real cool axe-thing going for you."

Spike walked out the back without being noticed.

"So you're gonna be with me in this."

"Shoulder to shoulder. I'm yours."

"No."

"No, what?" Angel asked.

"No. You're not gonna be in this fight." Buffy walked toward the door.

Angel cut her off. "Why the hell not?"

"'Cause I can't risk you."

"You need me in this."

"No, I need you gone."

"Why?"

"If I lose, if this thing gets past Sunnydale, then it's days, maybe hours, before the rest of the world goes. I need a second front, and I need you to run it."

"Ok," Angel agreed reluctantly, and crossed his arms. "That's one reason.

"There is no other," Buffy told him, and left the tomb.

Angel stopped her again and handed over the amulet. He looked like he wanted to say something more, but thought better of it. "I'll go start working on the second front. Make sure I don't have to use it," he told her, and walked away.

* * *

><p>Dawn waited at the hotel entrance for Buffy. As soon as she was in the door, Dawn kicked her in the shin.<p>

"Ow!" Buffy yelped.

"Dumbass," Dawn answered and walked away.

Buffy followed her to the conference room, where Xander waited with Anya, Giles, and Willow.

"Don't look at me," Xander said. "This is a Summers' thing. It's all very violent."

Buffy looked at Dawn. "If you get killed, I'm telling."

"Did you find out anything about the scythe? Willow asked.

"It slices, it dices, and makes julienne preacher," Buffy grinned.

"Caleb?" Giles inquired.

"I cut him in half," Buffy reported, still grinning.

"All right!" Willow cheered.

"He had that coming," Anya said, satisfied.

"Hey, party in my eye socket and everyone's invited," Xander added exuberantly. When everyone stared at him, he recalled what he said. "Sometimes I shouldn't say words," he said resignedly.

Buffy shook her head and leaned the scythe against the wall on her way out of the conference room. She found Spike in the gym, beating on the punching bag. "So where's tall, dark and forehead?" he asked when he saw her.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Let me guess. You can smell him."

"Yeah, that and I also used my enhanced vampire eyeballs to watch you kissing him."

"It was a hello."

"Most people don't use their tongues to say hello. Or I guess they do, but."

"There were no tongues," Buffy said impatiently. "Besides, he's gone."

"Oh, just popped by for a quickie, then?"

Buffy ignored him, and Spike approached her. "Where's the trinket?"

"The who-ket?"

"The pretty necklace your sweetie-bear gave you. The one with all the power. I believe it's mine now."

"How do you figure?"

"Someone with a soul, but more than human? Angel meant to wear it, that means I'm the qualified party." Spike held out his hand.

"It's volatile," Buffy hedged as she removed it from her pocket. "We don't know"

"You'll be needing someone strong to bear it, then. You planning on giving it to Andrew?"

Buffy looked at the amulet, then at Spike. "Angel said the amulet was meant to be worn by a champion."

Spike looked down, disappointed, but Buffy walked forward and handed it to him.

"Been called a lot of things in my time," Spike said.

"There's lots of empty rooms," Buffy said coyly.

"You can't buy me off with shiny beads and sweet talk. You got Angel breath. I'm not gonna just let you whack me back and forth like a rubber ball. I've got my pride, you know."

"I understand." Buffy turned to leave.

"Clearly you don't," Spike answered as he intercepted her. "'Cause the whole "having my pride" thing was just a smokescreen."

"Oh, thank God," Buffy sighed.

"I don't know what I would have done if you'd have gone out that door." He put his arm around her, and they walked to one of the first floor rooms at the back of the hotel. They settled on a bed, fully clothed, Spike's arm around Buffy. He fell asleep and rolled away from her, and Buffy got up.

She paced for a few minutes, then opened the patio door and stepped outside. She looked up at the sky, enjoying the silence.

The First, in Caleb's form this time, appeared beside her. "Pretty, ain't it?"

"You're not him."

"No, you killed him right and proper. Terrible loss. This man was my good right arm. 'Course, it don't pain me too much. Don't need an arm. Got an army."

"An army of vampires. However will I fight"

"Every day our numbers swell," the First continued. "But then you do have an army of your own. Some thirty-odd pimply-faced girls, don't know the pointy end of a stake. Maybe I should call this off," he said with faux concern.

"Have you ever considered a cool name? I mean, since you're incorporeal and basically powerless. How about "The Taunter?" Strikes fear in the heart"

"I will overrun this Earth," the First said firmly. "And when my army outnumbers the humans on this Earth, the scales will tip and I will be made flesh."

"Talk on. I'm not afraid of you."

The First rolled its eyes. "Then why aren't you asleep in your dead lover's arms?" it asked, and looked over at Spike. "'Cause he can't help you. Nor the other Slayers, nor your friends, certainly not your wanna-slay brigade. None of those girlies will ever know real power unless you're dead. You know the drill." It morphed into Buffy. "Into every generation, a slayer is born. One girl in all the world. She alone will have the strength and skill to. There's that word again. What you are. How you'll die. Alone. Where's your snappy comeback?"

"You're right."

"Hmm. Not your best."

"I'm drowning in footwear!" Spike said, dreaming. He sat up with a start, and when Buffy turned to look at him, the First disappeared. "Weird dream," Spike said, realizing after a moment that Buffy wasn't in the room. As she returned, he asked, "Buffy? Is something wrong?"

"No. Yeah. I just realized something. Something that really never occurred to me before. We're gonna win."


	21. Chapter 11

**Eleven**

There's a heart  
>Somewhere in darkness<br>Beating strong, a song I know  
>There's a moment I keep waiting for<br>When I'll know  
>I shake my fist at the gods who made me<br>_Surrounded_

* * *

><p>Willow and Kennedy's room was crowded. In addition to them, Jo, Blair, Dawn, Anya, Xander, and Giles looked incredulously at Buffy.<p>

"What do you think?" Buffy asked.

"That depends. Are you in any way kidding?"

"You don't think it's a good idea?" Buffy answered anxiously.

"It's pretty radical, B," Jo said, and squeezed Blair's hand reassuringly.

"It's a lot more than that," Giles said, and stood. "Buffy, what you said, it, it flies in the face of everything we've ever, every generation has ever done in the fight against evil." He smiled. "I think it's bloody brilliant."

"You mean that?"

"If you want my opinion."

"I really do."

"Whoa, hey. Not to poop on the party here," Willow said, "but I'm the guy that's gonna have to pull this thing off."

"It is beaucoup d'mojo," Jo said.

"This goes beyond anything I've ever done. It's a total loss of control, and not in a nice, wholesome, my girlfriend has a pierced tongue kind of way."

Dawn and Blair stared at her, and Giles looked away.

"I wouldn't ask if I didn't think you could do it," Buffy told her.

"I. I'm not sure that I'm stable enough."

"You can do this, Willow," Giles said. "We'll get the coven on the line, and we'll find out how they can help."

"Oh!" Dawn nodded. "Pierced tongue."

"Dawn needs to do a research thing," Buffy said with an air of panic.

"Yes, you do," Giles agreed quickly.

Dawn rolled her eyes. "It's cool," she said, and headed for the door. "Watcher junior to the library."

"I'll go dig up my sources," Giles said. "Quite literally, actually," he added as he walked away.

"C'mon Xander." Anya pulled him toward the door. "Let's go assemble the cannon fodder.

"That's not what we're calling them, sweetie," he answered as they left.

"Not to their faces. What am I, insensitive?"

Buffy handed the scythe to Willow. Jo moved beside Buffy and looked at Willow, sitting on the bed with Kennedy's arm around her. Blair, not quite comprehending all that was happening, hung on to Jo's hand while she knelt in front of Willow.

Jo put her hand over Willow's on the scythe. "We'll get him," she said, hoping it would trigger Willow's memory.

It did, and Willow smiled a tiny smile at her. "Fuck you, Faith."

Jo grinned and stood up. "We'll be with the rest of the cannon fodder."

"What was that about?" Buffy and Blair asked at the same time.

Jo waited until they were in the hallway to answer. "That was an attagirl," she smiled broadly, and pulled Blair into a kiss.

"Inside joke," Willow answered. "You really think I can do this?" she asked Buffy nervously.

"I know you can."

"You can do it," Kennedy added, and squeezed her gently.

"All right," Willow sighed.

A few minutes later, everyone was in the main conference room. Buffy faced the gathering. "I hate this," she began. "I hate being here. I hate that you have to be here. I hate that there's evil, and that I was chosen to fight it. I wish, a whole lot of the time, that I hadn't been. I know a lot of you wish I hadn't been either. But this isn't about wishes. This is about choices. I believe we can beat this evil. Not when it comes, not when its army is ready, now. Tomorrow morning I'm opening the seal. I'm going down into the Hellmouth, and I'm finishing this once and for all. Right now you're asking yourself, 'What makes this different? What makes us anything more than a bunch of girls being picked off one by one?' It's true none of you have the power that Jo and Kennedy and I do. So here's the part where you make a choice.

"What if you could have that power now? In every generation, one slayer is born because a bunch of men who died thousands of years ago made up that rule. They were powerful men. This woman," Buffy pointed at Willow, "is more powerful than all of them combined."

Willow whimpered, but Buffy ignored her.

"So I say we change the rule," Buffy concluded, smiling. "I say my power should be our power. Tomorrow, Willow will use the essence of the scythe to change our destiny. From now on, every girl in the world who might be a Slayer, will be a Slayer. Every girl who could have the power, will have the power; can stand up, will stand up. Slayers, every one of us. Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?"

It took a few seconds for the noise to begin, and longer than that for Jo to whistle them into silence. "We got other things to do," she said. "Anybody who doesn't have anything else to do today, grab your weapons and meet me in the lobby. The rest of you, get to work."

The noise rose again, but girls left the room as instructed. Jo kissed Blair quickly. "I'll be back in a couple hours," she reassured her, and headed out the door.

Anya appeared beside Blair. "C'mon. You'll worry less if you're busy," she told her, and pulled her toward the kitchen.

"I'm goin' with Jo, unless you need me here," Kennedy said to Willow, and when Willow shook her head, Kennedy kissed her cheek. "Back soon," she promised, and took off.

Soon, the room was empty except for Dawn, Willow, and Giles. "Do you need somewhere quieter to work?" Giles asked.

"No, I need all this stuff. Or most of it. I don't know. Goddess, this is"

"Breathe, Willow," Dawn reminded her. "You'll be fine."

"It's not fine," Willow insisted, trying to resist the panic rising in her.

"It is," Giles said firmly. "You can do this." He took the chair beside Willow and picked up a pad and pencil. He sketched the scythe quickly. "If they can feel the power it holds, you can reach it."

Dawn listened with half an ear while Giles calmed Willow and led her into the beginning of designing the spell. When she heard Willow ask a question, she smiled and went in search of the book that held the answer.

When the potentials left the lobby, Xander was waiting with a school bus. Buffy was the last one on. "A boy and his toys," she grinned at him.

He shrugged, closed the door, and started the drive to the school.

When they arrived, Buffy broke them into teams. She sent Jo and Kennedy with Xander and set the others to clearing the halls.

Jo took Xander's backpack as they headed toward the basement. "What's in here?"

"Plastic explosive," he grinned. "Also fuses and timers."

"You know to use that stuff?" Kennedy asked skeptically.

"Oh, yeah," Xander answered gleefully. "Remind me to tell you about the last time I blew up the school."

"So that's how you have job security," Jo teased him.

"Absolutely." Xander stopped in front of a door in the basement. "Kennedy, will you open that, please?"

"We gonna need it again?"

"Yeah."

She jerked it open, careful not to pull it from the hinges, and waved her hand toward the dark tunnel. "All yours."

"Flashlights are in the pack," he answered, and Jo turned so he could get them out. They each took one, then followed him into the sewer access.

An hour later, Kennedy kicked the door closed. "I don't think I can shower long enough to get rid of that smell."

"Vicks Vapo-Rub," Jo suggested. "Unless Willow has something better, and if she does, you better share."

They went back upstairs helped Xander rig a few non-explosive traps. Buffy found them when they were nearly finished and looked at up at Kennedy crawling across a beam. "You about done?" she asked.

"Yeah, this is the last one," he answered. "You get everything else in place?"

"Uh huh."

"Over about another foot," Xander yelled.

They heard Kennedy's voice but couldn't make out the words. Jo, directly under her, snickered.

"That's good," Xander called.

They all watched Kennedy slide back on the beam. When she reached the floor, Jo clapped her on the back. "Good job."

"'Cause you didn't have to do it."

"Bein' the baby's a bitch, huh?" Jo asked without sympathy, and laughed as she walked away.

"You're a riot," Kennedy grumbled, and joined the group. "Are we done now?"

"Yes. Get the potentials back on the bus."

A few minutes later, they were en route to the hotel.

* * *

><p>After they finished dinner, Blair and Jo went upstairs.<p>

"What's going to happen tomorrow?" Blair asked.

"I don't know." Jo sat on the bed and took off her boots.

"You must have some idea."

"Well, if everything goes right, all the potentials will become Slayers, and we'll be strong enough to win."

"And if it doesn't?" Blair asked softly.

Jo got up and went to her. "I don't know," she said again, and put her arms around Blair.

"What am I supposed to do?"

"You are gonna stay with Willow while she does her big spell, and after that, I think you'll be able to figure it out."

"You aren't allowed to die again."

"Got it."

"This is worse than finals."

Jo laughed and hugged her tightly. "I love you."

"I love you."

"Next time we come to California, we'll do something fun," Jo promised, and kissed her.

* * *

><p>Two rooms down the hall, Willow sat cross-legged on the bed, laptop in front of her and a sheaf of papers in her hand. Kennedy stretched on the bed behind her and played with Willow's hair.<p>

"I really wish she hadn't said that about me," Willow said.

"What, the thing Buffy said? I think it's true."

Willow squeaked.

"I'll be with you," Kennedy reassured her. "To keep you grounded."

"Yeah, well, you might have to keep me stab-bed, if I go to the bad place."

Kennedy sat up and looked at her. "You're saying I might have to kill you."

"I am," Willow agreed.

"Bite me."

"I will. I mean, I do mean it. The darkest place I've ever been, this is what lies beyond that. This is too important for me to"

"Buffy believes in you."

"You know, Buffy: sweet girl, not that bright."

"Hey, I'm the first one to call her out when she's not making sense. In fact, this may have escaped your keen notice, but I'm kind of a brat. I've always sort of gotten my way. So you're gonna make it through this, no matter how dark it gets. Because now, you're my way."

They kissed, and when it ended, Willow went back to her paperwork. "I better go over this again."

Kennedy laid down and curled around her.

* * *

><p>Giles and Xander are looked intently at a map on the table.<p>

"I'm, I'm, I'm all turned around," Giles sputtered. "You're here?"

"By the pillar, yeah. I'm protecting this area."

"That puts me over by the door. Demons around the perimeter. Right! I open the door."

Andrew, wearing a red cloak, read from a book. "You go through the door and are confronted by Trogdor the Burninator."

"Oh, bugger it," Giles grumbled. "Fight." He rolled the dice, and sipped from his wine glass.

"Adios to 5 hit points. Trogdor has badly wounded you," Andrew reported.

"Well, wait a minute." Giles put on his glasses. "What about my bag of illusions?"

"Illusions against a Burninator?" Andrew scoffed. "Silly, silly British man."

Giles sipped his wine again.

"I invoke a time flux on Trogdor," Amanda said authoritatively.

"Step down, girlfriend, you can't just"

"Ninth level sorcerer, and I carry the emerald chalice. Trogdor is frozen in time. Deal with it." Amanda made a note.

"Smackdown on Red Riding Hood," Xander grinned. "This could get ugly."

"Could it possibly get uglier?" Giles asked. "I used to be a highly respected watcher, and now I'm a wounded dwarf with the mystical strength of a doily. I just wish I could sleep."

"What kind of person could sleep on a night like this?" Amanda asked.

Xander looked at the next chair. Anya was passed out on the table. "Only the crazy ones," he said fondly, and stroked Anya's hair while she snored.

* * *

><p>"Welcome to Sunnydale High," Buffy announced as she led them into the building. "Only rule is: If they move, kill them. OK, potentials, in the basement. Follow Spike and Jo."<p>

Jo raised Blair's hand and kissed her knuckles before setting off. Potentials streamed past Buffy.

"If you have to go to the bathroom, it's to your left," Xander said loudly. "If you don't have to go to the bathroom, picture what you're about to face. Better to go now."

"Willow, you'll be right through there. It's directly over the seal," Buffy said.

Kennedy took Willow's bag. "I'll start getting you set up." She looked at Blair. "C'mon."

"Thanks," Willow said as they walked away.

"If the vampires get upstairs, we have three areas they could get through to another building and then down into the sewers," Xander explained. He pointed. "Down the hall in the atrium, the north hall here, and the primary target, through the lounge straight to the science building. Now odds are, most of them will head there."

"I'll take the north hall," Giles volunteered.

"Xander, I want you with Dawn," Buffy instructed.

"I concur," Xander said.

"We'll check out the atrium," Dawn said.

"So that leaves me and the dungeon master in the lounge?" Anya asked.

"We will defend it with our very lives," Andrew said solemnly.

"Yes, we will defend it with his very life."

"And don't be afraid to use him as a human shield," Xander told Anya.

She nodded. "Good, yes, thanks."

"I just want to say how proud I am to die for this very special cause with you guys," Andrew began. He pulled a sheet of paper from his back pocket, unfolded it, and began to read aloud. "There's some, um. There's people I'd like to thank, both good and evil. Um, a shout out to my brother Tucker, who gave me the inspiration to summon demons and also"

Anya dragged him away. "Nobody cares, you little monkey."

"I'm gonna check out our field of engagement," Dawn said, and walked away.

Buffy went after her. "Dawn."

Dawn turned to face her. "No," she said resolutely. "Anything you say is gonna sound like goodbye." She walked away again.

Buffy returned to the few left in the hallway. Willow, Xander, Giles, and Buffy stared at each other for several long moments.

"So," Buffy said finally, "What do you guys want to do tomorrow?"

"Nothing strenuous," Willow answered first.

"Well, mini-golf is always the first thing that comes to mind," Xander said.

"I think we can do better than that," Giles responded.

"I was thinking about shopping." Buffy smiled. "As per usual."

"Oh! There's an Arden B. in the new mall!" Willow said excitedly.

"I could use a few items," Xander said.

"Well, now aren't we gonna discuss this? Save the world to go to the mall?" Giles asked incredulously.

"I'm having a wicked shoe craving," Buffy said.

"Aren't you on the patch?" Xander asked her.

"Those never work," Willow told him.

"Here I am, invisible to the eye," Giles said, and the others walked down the hall together.

"See, I need a new look," Xander said. "it's this whole eye patch thing."

"Oh, you could go with full black secret agent look," Buffy suggested.

"Or the puffy shirt, pirate slash," Willow began.

Giles watched them. "The earth is definitely doomed," he said, and headed toward his post.

As Buffy, Xander and Willow walked down the hall, their conversation faded. When they reached the office, Willow slipped in without saying anything. They reached an intersection, and Xander squeezed Buffy's hand before turning off. Buffy continued down the hall alone, into the basement, where Jo and the potentials waited for her around the Seal of Danzalthar.

Jo handed Buffy a knife. "You first, B."

Buffy sliced her palm and returned the knife to Jo, who repeated the action. The knife went around the circle until it returned to its owner. They turned their palms to the seal, and it opened, creating a stairway into the Hellmouth. Buffy went down first.

* * *

><p>Upstairs, Willow sat on the floor, a semi-circle of white candles lit in front of her. Other candles were spread throughout the room. Kennedy sat across from Willow, watching her, while Blair stood nervously in the far corner.<p>

"They should be in place," Willow said, and sat back, hands on her knees. "Ok, magic time." She looked at Kennedy. "You ready to kill me?"

"Starting to be," Kennedy answered deadpan.

"Good," Willow said uncertainly. "Fun. Great. Brace yourself."

"Come on, Red," Kennedy whispered. "Make it happen."

Blair just stared.

* * *

><p>In the Hellmouth, Spike looked at the amulet around his neck. "Not to be a buzzkill, love, but my fabulous accessory isn't exactly tingling with power."<p>

"I'm not worried," Buffy chanted to psych herself up as she looked around.

"I'm getting zero juice here, and I look like Elizabeth Taylor," Spike complained.

"Cheer up, Liz," Jo said. "Willow's big spell doesn't work, it won't matter what you wear."

The others followed Buffy to the edge of a cliff. They looked down and saw more Turok-Han than they could count, mobbed as far as they could see, all growling, spitting, and hissing as they waited for the signal that would release them.

"I'm not worried." Buffy said.

Spike backed up.

"I'm not worried," Buffy repeated.

"Really?" Rona asked. "'Cause I'm flashing back to Xander's whole bathroom speech."

"Buffy," Amanda said, fear obvious in her voice.

"I'm not worried," Buffy said. "As long as Willow can work her spell before they see us."

As she said that, the Turok-Han looked up, then rushed for them, snarling and screaming.

Buffy stood her ground. "Willow," she said softly, both a reminder to trust her best friend and a prayer for her success.

The scythe lay on the floor in front of Willow as she worked the spell. Suddenly, she and the weapon began to glow with a bright white light. "Oh. My. Goddess," Willow said breathlessly.

At that moment, the world began to change.

The Turok-Han army rushed over the cliff and met an army of supercharged Slayers. Buffy and Jo battled with punches, kicks, and stakes, as they did on every patrol. Vi kicked an ubervamp to the ground. Rona knocked another down with a punch. Amanda staked the one nearest her, and Vi beheaded another.

* * *

><p>Kennedy grinned at the rush, and looked through the light at Willow. Her hair, now completely white, streamed behind her, and she panted through a beatific smile as the power ran through her into the universe. She felt the awakening of every new Slayer across the planet through the scythe, which continued to glow.<p>

Blair stared in amazement. She had no idea of what to expect, but even she could feel the power in the room, and began to smile hopefully.

"Willow?" Kennedy said uncertainly as the glow faded.

Willow's hair returned to its normal color, but she still looked lost in the spell.

"You," Kennedy smiled at her, "are a goddess."

Willow smiled and raised the scythe. "Get this to Buffy."

Kennedy scrambled up. She took the scythe from Willow and dropped a kiss on her head before racing from the room.

"Ha!" Willow fell onto her side, still smiling. "That was nifty."

* * *

><p>Below, the Turok-Han began to overcome the bodies attempting to hold them back.<p>

"Buffy!" Kennedy yelled from the staircase and threw the scythe to her. "Catch."

Buffy didn't look. She reached up and pulled it from the air, and redoubled her efforts. Turok-Han became dust by the dozen as she worked with the weapon, and Kennedy waded into the fray. Around her, the new Slayers fought with the speed, precision, and intensity they previously admired in Buffy, Jo, and Kennedy. Still, some of the Turok-Han were able to get past them and climb out of the Hellmouth.

* * *

><p>As the noise increased on the school's main floor, Andrew ducked behind Anya. "I think they're coming," he moaned.<p>

"Oh, God. I'm terrified," Anya said. "I didn't think. I mean, I just figured you'd be terrified, and I would be sarcastic about it."

"Picture happy things," Andrew suggested. "A lake, candy canes, bunnies."

"Bunnies!" Anya yelled angrily. "Floppy, hoppy, bunnies," she snarled, raised her sword, and beheaded the first two Turok-Han to approach.

"I have swimmer's ear!" Andrew screamed, and was pushed into the wall.

Giles stood alone in the hallway, using every tool at his disposal to beat back the Turok-Han. He had a few spells, some of them pouches of herbs that he, Dawn, and Willow made up, that became fire, a blessed sword in his hand and another on his back.

* * *

><p>Spike stopped fighting for a second, and looked down at the amulet, which was giving him an odd feeling. He touched it and winced as it burned him. "Buffy!" he yelled. "Whatever this thing does, I think it's working."<p>

"Keep the line together," Buffy ordered the girls around her. "Drive them to the edge. We can't let them do" she stopped and looked down at the sword blade protruding from her stomach. She took two steps forward before collapsing.

Jo saw her go down and went to her. "Buffy!"

Buffy leaned up on her elbows. "Hold the line," she said weakly, and handed the scythe to Jo.

Jo nodded as she accepted the weapon, and charged back into the fight. Buffy remained on the ground, grunting in pain.

* * *

><p>Dawn and Xander stood in the atrium and waited as the Turok-Han approached. Dawn held her sword but stayed in the background while Xander held them back. When there were too many, Dawn pulled a rope. A sandbag fell and the skylight opened. The sunlight turned the Turok-Han to dust.<p>

"We call that the greenhouse effect," Xander said smugly. "Very dangerous."

A Turok-Han edged around the light and attacked Xander. He went down, and Dawn went on the attack.

Bringers joined the Turok-Han in the hallways. In the lounge, Anya battled them, slashing and stabbing frenziedly. Andrew assaulted some of the Bringers, but couldn't keep them back. One sliced through Anya's torso.

Giles groaned when the Bringers approached, and unsheathed his other sword. He went toward them fearlessly.

* * *

><p>When there were too many Turok-Han around her to use the scythe effectively, Jo called to the nearest Slayer and threw the weapon to her. Buffy remained down, and somehow avoided being trampled.<p>

"Oh, no." The First Evil mocked Buffy by using her appearance. "Ow! Mommy, this mortal wound is all itchy. You pulled a nice trick. You came pretty close to smacking me down. What more do you want?"

Buffy gritted her teeth. "I want you," she said, sitting up, "to get out of my face," she finished as she got to her feet.

When Rona saw her, she threw the scythe to Buffy, who caught it and knocked three Turok-Han over the cliff with her first swing. When the others saw her back on her feet, it renewed their hope. Jo cleared the area around her while Kennedy simultaneously disarmed and staked two ubervamps. The others began to push back against the flood of Turok-Han.

Spike stumbled back from the fight as the amulet powered up. He instinctively grabbed it to remove it from his chest, and screamed, "Oh, bollocks!" when it burned his hand again.

A focused ray of bright blue light shot out of the amulet. It knocked a hole in the basement and continued unimpeded through the floor of the office where Willow recovered, opening space between she and Blair, and from there until the sky was visible in the Hellmouth. Once it reached the outside, the light changed to orange.

"Buffy!" Spike bellowed.

"Spike!" Buffy acknowledged, and started for him.

Before she could get there, the amulet refracted the orange light into the Hellmouth, breaking into rays like sunshine through the evening clouds, blowing the Turok-Han to dust. The ground began to shake.

"Everybody out! Now!" Jo ordered.

While the others rushed for the stairs, Buffy went to Spike. He looked at her, amazed. "I can feel it, Buffy."

"What?"

"My soul." He looked at her. "It's really there. Kind of stings."

The girls rushed out of the basement. One of them saw Andrew, and grabbed him on the way by.

Blair helped Willow to her feet. "Time to go," she said, and they stumbled into the traffic in the hall. A moment later, Kennedy put her arm around Willow. She looked at Blair. "She's coming," she reassured her, and kept them moving.

The building began to fail, and Xander and Dawn began to run for the exit. "Anya!" Xander screamed. "Anya!"

He didn't see her body, but Dawn did, and pulled him down the hall.

* * *

><p>Jo chased the last few Slayers up the stairs. Buffy stood near Spike, her eyes moving from his face to the amulet that continued to light the Hellmouth, the scythe in her hand.<p>

"Go on, then," Spike encouraged her.

"No. No, you've done enough. You could still"

"No, you've beat them back. It's for me to do the cleanup."

Around them, the walls began to crumble.

"Buffy, come on!" Jo yelled from the top of the stairs.

"Gotta move, lamb. I think it's fair to say school's out for bloody summer."

"Spike," Buffy began.

"I mean it!" he answered forcefully. "I gotta do this." He held out hand.

Buffy laced her fingers with his and they burst into flame.

"I love you," Buffy told him.

"No, you don't. But thanks for saying it." The earth rumbled again, and Buffy let go of his hand. "Now go!" Spike ordered, and Buffy ran up the stairs. "I wanna see how this ends."

While Buffy ran up the stairs, Spike remained in the crumbling Hellmouth, grinning as he burned up in the sunlight powering the amulet. When he was nothing but dust, the Hellmouth crumbled around him.

The school building exploded. Jo ran from the cloud of dust and jumped into the moving bus. She held on to the nearest rail and scanned the faces until she saw Blair. Dawn stared out the back window, worrying and hoping.

Buffy raced through the hallway, still carrying the scythe. She ducked falling debris and hurdled anything she couldn't run over or through. The main entrance collapsed, and she turned for the stairs. The roof door popped open when she hit it at full speed, and she kept going, leaping from building to building. She didn't look back, only forward, until she found her target and pulled out her last reserve to sprint over the last few roofs and leap onto the bus.

She spun around, remembering to hang onto the scythe, and watched Sunnydale become a giant sinkhole.

Xander concentrated on keeping the bus on the road. He kept the accelerator jammed to the floor until Jo tapped him on the shoulder. "Ease off," she told him. "We're clear."

Xander slowed, then stopped the bus. Buffy jumped down from its roof. Seconds later, Dawn opened the emergency exit, slid out of the bus and ran to her sister. While the others got out, she hugged Buffy.

"I don't understand," Giles said from behind them. "Who did this?"

"Spike," Buffy answered. Dawn let her go, and Buffy walked toward the edge of the canyon. The 'Welcome to Sunnydale' sign wavered, then fell backward and tumbled down the rubble.

"So, did you see?" Xander asked Andrew anxiously.

"I was scared." Andrew looked at his feet. "I'm sorry."

"Did you see what happened?" Xander asked. "I mean, was she?"

"She was incredible." Andrew looked at him. "She died saving my life."

Xander put his hand on Andrew's shoulder and nodded. "That's my girl. Always doing the stupid thing." After a moment, he walked toward Buffy.

Jo kept her eyes on Blair while the others left the bus. When the rush was over, Blair walked up the aisle. They hugged each other tightly, and shared a quick kiss before Jo turned for the door, pulling Blair behind her.

They worked their way to Buffy and Dawn, joining Xander, Giles, Willow and Kennedy at the edge of the hole.

"Looks like the Hellmouth is officially closed for business," Jo observed.

"There is another one in Cleveland," Giles informed them. "Not to spoil the moment," he added, then bent down, picked up a rock, and threw it into the canyon.

"We saved the world," Xander said, still a little surprised.

"We changed the world," Willow corrected, and walked to Buffy's side. "I can feel them, Buffy," she said with wonder. "All over. Slayers are awakening everywhere."

"We'll have to find them," Dawn said.

"We will," Willow agreed.

Giles paced behind them. "Yes, because the mall was actually in Sunnydale, so there's no hope of going there tomorrow."

"We destroyed the mall? I fought on the wrong side," Dawn said.

"All those shops gone," Xander agreed. "The Gap, Starbucks, Toys "R" Us. Who will remember all those landmarks unless we tell the world about them?"

"We have a lot of work ahead of us," Giles observed.

"Can I push him in?" Kennedy asked Willow.

"You've got my vote," Willow agreed.

"I just want to sleep for a week," Jo said.

"I guess we all could, if we wanted to," Dawn replied.

"Yeah," Willow smiled. "The First is scrunched, so, what do you think we should do, Buffy?"

"Yeah, you're not the one and only chosen anymore. Just gotta live like a person. How's that feel?" Jo asked her.

"Yeah, Buffy. What are we gonna do now?" Dawn chimed in.

Buffy ignored the voices around her. She stared out over the ruins of Sunnydale and slowly smiled. After a minute or so, she turned to face them, still smiling, and planted the scythe in the blacktop like a flag. "We're going to Disneyland!"

After a moment of disbelief, the others joined her laughter.

* * *

><p><strong>Epilogue<strong>

And sometimes you sense how faithfully your life  
>is delivered, even though you can't read the address.<br>From _Trust_, Thomas R. Smith

The first stop was the hospital. The second was the hotel nearest the hospital. After a day to rest up, Buffy loaded them all into the bus, and had Xander drive them to Disneyland. Buffy's favorite memory was captured in a photo: Giles wearing mouse ears, standing next to Mickey, which Willow e-mailed to Jo. After a few days, the diaspora began. The Slayers began to sort themselves into two groups: those who would stay with the group, and those who returned home.

Jo and Blair were all ready home by then. Blair went directly from the airport to her first exam. Jo dropped their things at the apartment and returned to the campus. She paced impatiently outside the lecture hall until Blair came out, and over Blair's protest, took her to the student union for a quick lunch before Blair's second exam.

They didn't talk that night, except to agree to put any serious discussions off until they were both rested. After Blair's last exam, they rode Jo's motorcycle to Georgia, taking their time on slower roads. After three days spent lounging on the beach, they began to talk about what happened in Sunnydale and what it meant.

It was the same argument they'd had since Blair learned there was another Slayer nearby. Blair wanted Jo to stop slaying, and Jo didn't want to. Blair recruited Willow and Buffy to argue her point with Jo, which started another round of heated discussions. They finally agreed that Jo would be available to the new crew if they really needed her, and that she would reduce her patrolling in favor of, as Blair put it, "a real life."

The Scoobies were astonished by how many chose to stay, and held no grudge against those who left. Giles asked only that they leave contact information, which Willow put into a database. The Scoobies relocated to Cleveland long enough to permanently seal that Hellmouth, then moved to Miami to rebuild the Watcher's Council.

The new Council instituted uniform training programs for Slayers, Watches, and witches. They established houses at active locations around the world with two or three Slayers, a Watcher, and a witch in residence at each location.

The books Giles carefully packed and shipped away from Sunnydale became the nucleus of the central research library. Willow added them to the digital collection she'd been building since high school, so the entire organization had access to those resources. Giles continued to recoup the defunct Watcher's Council funds, and there was no shortage of money. Kennedy and Willow surprised everyone by staying together. They remained in Miami, sharing training and administrative duties with Giles, Xander, and Dawn. Buffy retired for a while, but quickly became bored and started moving from location to location, and when that got old, she settled in Miami with her family.

After Blair graduated from college, she went to work at Warner Industries in New York. Jo earned a degree and took the New York Police Department recruitment test. When she showed the results to Blair, they had several long discussions before Jo got her way. Buffy, Willow, Kennedy, and Xander came to New York for her graduation from the police academy. Each of them, without prompting from Blair, reminded Jo that she wasn't bulletproof.

Ten years after obliterating the Sunnydale Hellmouth, those who survived the battle gathered there. As they had before the dust settled, they stared over the wasteland. Unlike the 20 or so people observing it, the crater was unchanged. Smoke still rose from the center, and it emitted a low guttural noise. While they watched, something approached from the opposite side at a run and threw itself into the wreckage. No one heard it land. Instead, there was only a grinding noise that made Willow shiver and signaled the others that it was time to leave. Before they did, the offerings they brought in remembrance of those who didn't escape were piled on the crumbling pavement near the hole.

-30-


End file.
